Intro (loss mentioned, a little long)

artemis618

Hello!  I will probably be lurking for a while, but thought I'd introduce myself here in case I feel compelled to comment on anything so people aren't all, "Who is this chick?"

I'm artemis618 and ttc #1 at age 39.  DH (age 41.5) and I got married in June (6/18) and we couldn't believe our luck when we got pregnant with my July cycle (at our ages).  Well our luck didn't hold up as we lost our little girl (naturally and completely, thankfully) at 11w5d at the beginning of last month (10/1).  We BD'd last month (first cycle after loss) around what should have been the right time with no luck.

I just met with a RE last week because this month would have been six without a successful pregnancy >age 35 and we decided to bench ourselves this month as we're jumping straight into IVF (well, just starting the process - will do initial blood work with beginning of next cycle since I didn't think about this in time for this one) for screening and (hopefully) embryo banking purposes.  So while I don't officially have a diagnosis (yet?), I'm very lucky that my insurance will cover two cycles so long as there's a xfer within 90 days of the second retrieval.  If we are lucky enough to have a baby, and we can swing my taking some time off from work, this insurance benefit from my employer may not be available to me when we are ready to try for a second, and because we want a second, the prospect of potentially being able to bank some embryos to use later is appealing (not to mention screening to try to reduce chances of another loss - and my eggs certainly won't be any younger than they are now).  But we'll see what we get.

I actually went through the first half of IVF four years ago when I froze some (only got 9 mature) eggs four years ago after I turned 35.  But those frozen artemis618cicles are the last resort (and that RE doesn't take insurance).

So I guess that might put me on track for a transfer some time in the Spring?  I don't even know - I'm supposed to get my CD3 blood work/DH his SA before we meet with RE again to discuss.  If there's anywhere better on here to learn about IVF, please point me in that direction - but you ladies seem to know what's up.

I wish you all the best of luck!  I'll go back to lurking now

rainbowwishes5

Welcome! And I'm sorry for your loss.

oxinfree

Welcome @artemis618 ! IVF and infertility is something you generally have to go through to really understand I feel. It's almost like a cruel initiation. If we try and explain the ins and outs you'll feel undoubtedly overwhelmed... especially since there are so many varying scenarios dependent on your case, your RE, your outcomes etc. Once you get going though you take it day by day and it's not too bad. The emotional side of it is definitely something you want to prepare yourself for. We tend to focus so much on what I'll need to do and what I'll need to take and when etc. that we forget in a sense that there is a mental/emotional component to this journey as well, and it can be trying at times. Setting yourself up with a community of support (ie. this forum) is a great start! Make sure you talk with your significant other and effectively communicate how they can best support you. The rest of it all will fall into place and we'll be here to answer questions along the way. In the meantime, if you have any specific IVF questions I've been around the block so feel free to DM me. 

Also, if you're doing some testing and two banking cycles spring seems about right for transfer, but all dependent on cycle duration etc. etc. 

Best of luck to you on this journey. xo

artemis618

@oxinfree Thanks so much for your kind message.  I've mostly been lurking, but keeping busy (so off of here) with a work deadline and getting ready to move next weekend, so didn't see it till now.

Meeting with the RE next Wednesday to go over the CD3 and SA results (SA hopefully just a technicality as an FDA requirement as per the RE).  I had my first SSH on Monday, but she does want to take a closer look with a hysteroscopy (possibly retained tissue since she considers mc at almost 12 weeks on the later side).  The good news is she says we can do it in the same cycle as first ER, so hopefully both of those will happen next month.  Starting bc at the end of the month so I suppose that will give us a little more flexibility.

I have a long list of questions prepared for Wednesday, but I still find it super helpful to read about everyone's experiences (though it makes me consider things I hadn't before).  I'm grateful that so many people are willing to share their journeys.