CIO-late to the game — The Bump
January 2016 Moms

CIO-late to the game

I can't take the frequent night wakings and rocking to sleep any longer. I'm at my wits end and exhausted.  I know there was a thread on this a few months back but now that our LOs are older, I'm curious for those of you that have done it how things are now? I have said that I was going to do CIO but just never stuck to it because I didn't think I could be consistent with it knowing that's a key factor. It's a different story now. My LO is almost 10 months old and it's ridiculous at this point. 

I'm trying it tomorrow night since my husband is off the weekend and can help. Also, she currently gets a bottle in the middle of the night since that helps her fall back asleep quickly. With CIO do I still offer her a bottle? Can I offer her her pacifier? Thanks for the help guys! 

Re: CIO-late to the game

  • We did CIO several months ago and it was HARD, but only lasted a few nights. What kept me sane was a very sincere belief that a) he was crying in protest, not because he was hungry or wet or any physical problem, and b) ultimately, this would help him sleep more and better. It sounds like you're in the same place! 

    At this point, David still occasionally gives a few halfhearted cries for naps but goes down within a few minutes. He doesn't cry at bedtime. He does consistently wake up for nursing once/night and I have not made any attempts to change that. The only middle of the night CIO I've had to do was that after nursing he would sometimes cry when I put him back in the crib. Two nights of letting him cry back to sleep and now he goes back in happily even if he's still awake. I will sometimes hear him talking and hitting the wall after I leave, but not crying thank goodness! 

    Overall it has been a really positive thing for all of us and I wish you success!
    krrpe99
  • Honestly. I am adamantly against CIO, I think it's probably the worst sleep training option out there. 
    BUT I will offer the hope that we have been using The Baby Whisperer the last 5 days and are already seeing significant progress. Like down to 1-3 wake ups from 4-6, and down to 1 night feed from 3, and daily improvement still. I personally feel it's a better option, since you aren't leaving your baby alone at any point, for any amount of time. My LO just turned 9 months last week and he really seems to be responding to it. 
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  • @kvacmak Ok I'm intrigued, and happy for you guys! Whats the gist of the baby whisperer method?
  • Also curious about the baby whisperer. I'm opened to anything at this point. Seems like an awesome outcome for you guys. 
  • We did CIO at 6 months. She also had one feeding at night at that time. Its hard but it only lasted a few nights. Just keep in mind that a full night sleep isnt just good for you, its good for baby! If you want to cut out the motn feeding then itll be especially hard. We cut it out when we did it and her cry was heartbreaking but she immediately started esting more during the day. We kept her soother. We felt it was too much for her to cut out food and do sleep training. She still uses it and we are ok with it. Here are some tips I found helpful:
    1) be CONSISTENT. If you plan to go in at 5 min intervals, stick to it. Don't go in early. They will think crying makes you come in and they wont learn
    2) when you go in don't stay in for longer then a minute. We went in, did not take her out of the crib, said "night night. Its time to go to sleep. Mommy and daddy love you" and walked out. Even if she was loosing it. 
    3) pick one of you to be the one to go in. We were switching but it wound her up more
    4) if you're cutting out that night feeding, she will cry hard. Either try feeding her more during the day, or (like we did) just let them cry and don't feed  her. She was gaining enough weight that we knew it wasnt effecting her. And like I said she ate more during the day after that.  By night three she wasnt hungry at night and slept way better. And could go to sleep on her own. 

    Good luck! Its only a few nights and everyone is happier! 
  • @cali1710 thanks for the helpful tips. When u went in to soothe her did u offer her the pacifier? How long did it take her to fall asleep on her own the first night? My LO stopped having a bottle in the motn at 6 months then recently, maybe a month ago , I started giving her a bottle again because I was desperate for sleep. Now it's definitely just a habit. 
  • fishee333 @JanuarysBaby1
    It's a combination of Pick-up/put-down and EASY (eat, activity, sleep, you time) during the day. But it reinforces that you do not give in, even if PU/PD doesn't feel like it's working. The first night I was in the room with LO for 1 1/2 hours, but it was so worth it in the end because now it only takes 10-15 minutes MAX to resettle him (and this is only 5 days in). Last night he made it all the way to 5 am before he needed a feed, so I'm thinking any day now he'll be able to go all night. He's eating so much more during the day, he's happier and just more energetic, and I am too!
    Seriously, the book is $18 on amazon, and if you get the kindle edition you can read it tonight!
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    JanuarysBaby1
  • We did CIO at 5.5 months.  the first night it took a full hour for him to sleep, but it was half that the next night.  We didn't try to cut out the night feeds since I was worried about his weight.  our rule was if he slept more than 3 hours I would nurse him.  if he fell asleep at the boon fine, but if he didn't, I wasn't going to let him nurse for 20+ minutes until he did anymore.  it took us about three night and now he can put himself to sleep in just a few minutes without any crying
    JanuarysBaby1
  • @cali1710 thanks for the helpful tips. When u went in to soothe her did u offer her the pacifier? How long did it take her to fall asleep on her own the first night? My LO stopped having a bottle in the motn at 6 months then recently, maybe a month ago , I started giving her a bottle again because I was desperate for sleep. Now it's definitely just a habit. 
    I have 4-5 soothers in her crib. She does rely on them to fall asleep so if she wakes in the night she can always grab one. 
    The first night it was 1.5 hours before she fell asleep, then woke once in the night and again took 1.5 hours (she expected food but we didnt give it to her). Night two she fell asleep in half an hour then woke once and it took 1.5 hours again. Night three it took 10 min with no crying and woke once in the night, went back to sleep after 15 min. Night 4 she slept through. If you know she can go without food like you said then its really just breaking the habit. 
    JanuarysBaby1
  • I just did CIO last week at almost 10 months old. I did a modified version. At night he usually nurses to sleep no problem (and I am ok with that one nurse to sleep) but it was becoming a battle to put him down into his crib. At my wits end I finally had to acknowledge that he was fed, dry, and completely fine. We did 5 minutes, go in and resettle, then 10, then 15, and so on. He's never made it past the 25 minute re settle. We also had to have the battle at nap time and it has made a world of difference. He now whines himself to sleep within 10 minutes tops. I have also started making sure he gets a lot of protein at dinner so that he's nice and full and sleeps well. He still wakes up 1-2 times a night for a feed, but it is very quick and he goes right back to sleep (he's very slow on liking solid food). Good luck mama, it's rough, but worth it in the long run.
    JanuarysBaby1
  • Thanks guys. Hopefully it goes smoothly. She falls asleep while having her last bottle before bed. I'm hoping that's not a big issue. I know you're supposed to put them down awake.  
    cali1710
  • My LO used to fall asleep during his last feed too. I switched up the routine so his last feed is the first thing we do at bedtime, then change, stories and lullabies. Now he's always awake when I put him down.

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    JanuarysBaby1cali1710
  • Ugh unfortunately CIO will not happen this weekend. My husband is sick so him helping as much won't happen until next weekend. I was so ready too! 
  • @januarysbaby1 I've done the whole CIO process on my own. DH is deployed and for my sanity it was just better to get it done and over with. It was a hard couple of nights and it broke my heart a bit, but it was soooo worth it for the better sleep. Sure we have a backslide night every now and again (last night), but for the most part it was better to do the CIO at bedtime than in the middle of the night and having multiple wake ups. Sometimes it's just best to bite the bullet and get it over with (your sanity and physical health are important!).
    cali1710
  • @cricket99 you're totally right. Last night went like this: Bed at 9 up at 1, 3, 345, back to sleep at 6 got up at 8. This was the last straw for me. I'm doing it tonight weather my husband is helping or not. I don't sleep either way so it really doesn't make a difference. I need to do it get it over with and feel normal again! 
    cali1710Cricket99
  • @JanuarysBaby1 good luck! Let us know how it goes! Honestly by yourself will be fine. Like you said you arent sleeping anywYs whats the difference! You'll do great and so will baby!
  • Thanks. I'm dreading it but just want it to be over. Did you guys do naps also at the same time as nighttime sleep? Ive read the Ferber method for naps that you try for an hour and if they don't fall asleep on their own, nap time is over.  
  • I did naps too. I didnt want to confuse her. They went really well! I think it helped with nighttime. 
    JanuarysBaby1
  • We did naps at the same time too.  The only time it didn't work is when he had a poopy diaper
    JanuarysBaby1
  • I also did naps at the same time too. It helped get the message across that when you are in bed it's time to sleep. 
  • How did it go?!
  • Surprisingly good! She was in her crib awake at 845. We went in at 3 minutes, 5 then 7. It was REALLY hard. I was borderline crying, I almost gave in. Then a hour and a half later she was asleep. I was in shock. She woke up again in the middle of the night not crying just playing. She did that for 20 minutes then fall back asleep! She woke for the day at 815! I hope tonight is the same if not better! She's like a different baby. So happy. 
    nackiecali1710
  • I'm so glad it went well!! I hope tonight is even better! You are giving me hope haha.
    I am definitely considering sleep training... again. Her sleep was so good after we did sleep training a while ago. Then traveling to Spain and a cold for about a month long threw everything off. Probably leaps and sleep regression didn't help. I swear, every night is getting worse. We were up 7 times last night. 7!! 3 of those times I nursed her. Gahh. I've been hoping she would magically get better but at this rate, it's just getting worse and worse every day. My mother in law is in town for the next week though so I think I have to put it off until next week. So. Tired.

    JanuarysBaby1
  • @fishee333 thanks! Friday night was the breaking point for me. I couldn't do the multiple wake ups any longer. It wasn't even like she would go right  back to sleep right away either. She would be up for 2 hours sometimes! I was also hoping that she would get better on her own but I knew it wasn't going to happen. Hopefully we will all get this sleep thing under control soon! 
  • So glad it went well!!!! 
    JanuarysBaby1
  • So glad it went well!!! Hope you continue to see progress, it's life changing when that baby finally sleeps I swear haha 
    JanuarysBaby1
  • How was night 2?!
  • Even better! No crying at bedtime but  woke up crying once for 10 minutes in the motn and went back to sleep. Naps were a huge improvement also today. Yesterday they weren't that great. I'm mad I didn't this months ago lol 
    cali1710l4rkMamabeagle
  • Thats awesome! Glad everything went so well!! 
    JanuarysBaby1
  • Glad it's working!!

    I kind of did "CIO" during the night accidentally. I was just so exhausted, I remember LO getting up several times, but I went back to sleep while she figured it out, though LO never ended up crying... just more fussing. So I'm not sure how long it took her to get back to sleep, but she did it! I still nursed her twice, and I'm working on making those stretches longer. I'm pushing out the first feeding in 15 min increments each night until we are back to just one 4am feeding per night. 
  • @fishee333 good luck! That sounds like a big improvement. It's totally worth it. Better sleep for both of you is on it's way! Like I mentioned previously, I'm mad I missed months of sleep because of not doing CIO sooner! 
  • What do you guys do for naps when you're at somebody's house? I use to rock her in the car seat or push her in the stroller but I don't want to do that any longer since she puts herself to sleep now. I was at my aunts house today and I tried putting her in the pack n play and it just wasn't happening! I had a very cranky baby when we got home lol
  • @januarysbaby1 From day one I have done naps in the Ergo. If we are out and about and it's nap time I just plop him in the carrier and off he drifts. I find it's much better to get him his nap when he needs it however I have to do that we don't have a mount Vesuvius meltdown....
    JanuarysBaby1
  • We have a travel pack n play that we'll bring.  it took him a while to get used to it, but now he knows when I put him there, it's naptime
    JanuarysBaby1
  • We have a pack and play too but I don't use it much. We've lucked out that events have been around her nap and my parents have a crib she can sleep in. 
    JanuarysBaby1
  • Freya has a hard time sleeping on the go or anywhere that's not in her crib. If we are lucky, and keep her whole nap routine exactly the same, we may get a nap. Or else she just doesn't sleep. Sometimes when shes in the carrier she is just so exhausted she passes out, but usually not. 
    JanuarysBaby1cali1710
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