A little back story: when my brother was in 7th grade (so like 12 or 13), his good friend hung himself. It happened seemingly out of nowhere and was obviously devastating for his family and friends. My brother has never really been the same since his friend's death. He did the typical kid stuff and acted out a ton while he was in high school. When he was in college, he started getting in a lot of legal trouble and then we found out he had been doing drugs and was drinking like crazy. He's now 28, and finally starting to get his life back on track and is doing really well. I've always suspected the death of his friend played a large role in his destructive behaviors, but my family isn't the type that really discusses these things.
We are expecting a boy this time around and have been struggling to find a name we both like. I suggested the name Caleb to H today, and he said he liked it. The only problem is, that was my brother's friend's name. In all honesty, it would be a name to honor him because I was also quite fond of his friend. He was just one of those kids that always made you laugh and was just all around sweet and kind.
I texted my dad and asked him what he thought, but he hasn't responded yet. I didn't even bother asking my mom because she'll blow it out of proportion one way or another (either that we are so great for honoring him, or that we're thoughtless and horrible people for using it). I don't want to say anything to my brother yet because I'm not sure we're even going to use it yet.
What would you do? Should I just ask him and see what he thinks? Or should we just forgo the name and find something else?