Anxiety

kelseycookies84

Hi ladies.

I had a miscarriage late summer-no embryo ever formed-and very quickly became pregnant again, last period was 8/30. I was very worried the entire time I was pregnant before because I didn't have any symptoms. I kept telling people I was sure something was wrong, and they told me I was worrying too much. Obviously I ended up being right. 

Last week I experienced some bleeding, first bright red and then it turned a dark brown. I went in to see my doctor and was convinced before I got there that I was headed for another miscarriage. I was shocked to learn that everything looked fine and he even detected a heart beat, though of course I'm aware how of how often you can get a false reading this early.  I was also comforted because I started experiencing some nausea and food aversions. 

Now I'm back to worrying because the nausea has subsided though I do still have some food aversions, but I'm worried that the aversions are just in my head. I've also still been experiencing some dark spotting. 

I know I just have to wait until I go back to the doctor to really know what's going on, but thought I would post on here to hear about what other people are going through. Would love to know how everyone is coping with the worry!

xoxo

xomarisaxo

@kelseycookies84. first off congrats! Sorry you are going though this. I know a lot of people who spotted throughout the whole first trimester. When is your next doctors appointment? Maybe your doctor can have you come in early
and check your levels just to give an idea and put your mind at ease?? Sending positive vibes !

Assiram42

@kelseycookies84, I'm so sorry for your loss. unfortunately, after experiencing a loss, it can really play mind tricks on us. I'd take it day by day.

Unfortunately, some spotting can be perfectly normal, or it could be a bad sign.  I've had spotting in each pregnancy and everything turned out fine.  However, I didn't have any spotting with my m/c.

Pregnancy is such a mind f*ck.

HollyGolightly09

I can not even imagine how difficult this must be when you have already experienced a loss. I find myself being anxious a lot, without any basis for it. 

I have noticed my symptoms kind of subsiding the past few days, which had me worried... but, I figure no symptoms are going to stay completely consistent from day to day-  why should pregnancy be any different? 

I hope everything turns turns out okay! Try to take some peace of mind from them saying everything seemed good as of now. 

mamaelle27

Pregnancy, especially the first trimester, is a naturally anxious time. I'm sure that it's even harder when you've experienced a loss like yours. I just try to stay positive and be happy about the baby right now, and heaven forbid something went wrong, worry about it then and not now, because otherwise I'll make myself sick over something that is very unlikely to happen anyway. Know that you're not alone, and most of us are nervous and analyzing everything that happens. If you're concerned about spotting or anything else, don't be afraid to call your doctor, that's what they are there for and they'll tell you when to worry and/or provide reassurance if it's probably nothing. Also, the anxiety will get easier after the first trimester, so hang in there. 

semicolon

I am a PGAL late loss mom and the one thing I believe in my heart, is that if you suspect complications you call and go in ASAP. My heart is with you, and my name is also Kelsey. Let me know how things go! ❤️

email2ash

Sending you positive vibes! I also had a miscarriage this summer due to an ectopic. I am 7w today and spotted for two days last week. When I went in everything looked good as well. Hoping both of our babies are getting comfortable in there!

kelseycookies84

You have all been wonderfully sweet and helpful. I'm going to try my best to relax and hang in there until my appointment in two weeks. I'll be sure to let you know how it goes, and I'm sending good vibes for healthy babies to all of you as well. Lots of hugs. xo

HookEmNelson

@kelseycookies84 Like most ladies above, I can completely relate.  The anxiety can be overwhelming at times, but I really try to stop, breathe and tell myself that I'm doing everything I can for this pregnancy.  It's hard to give up control, when you just have to trust your body.  PGAL brain is hard to get past.  One day at a time.

merrylea

Yes. This. All of this.  I am scared AF about all I cannot control.  I am old. I am overweight. This is my first pregnancy.  At my 8 week appointment in a few days THEY ARENT EVEN DOING ANY TESTING. No blood tests, no peaking up the ole vjay jay, no Doppler, nothing!  It's an intro!!!! How do I know that this is a viable pregnancy?  How do I know that little chalupa batman is doing ok?  ARGGGGGH!!!!!

abmommy15

With my son I was a wreck the whole time.  Had next to no symptoms and an anterior placenta that made it hard to feel movement.  I would love to tell you the worry goes away but it doesn't.  Just concentrate on taking care of yourself and your nugget and try your best not to worry.  I bought an at home Doppler that really helped once I could hear the heart beat but nothing calmed my fears early on.  I'm sure I will be the same with this one but I just keep telling myself I'm doing everything I can to be healthy and that's all I can do.  

HollyGolightly09

@merrylea

lol, chalupa batman is great! 

It does seem odd that they aren't doing anything. I'm sure that is very stressful. Do you know how soon you'll go back? 

amberp1528

@merrylea I went in a 6 and a day and all they did was a pee test to see if I was pregnant my doctor did ask a lot about symptoms too. At 8 weeks I do however get to do the whole 9 yards I would just ask what is normal there 

kdanjou

Anxiety sucks.  I just try to tell myself that there is nothing I can do except wait and see. 

merrylea

@Hollygolightly09 - I think it is odd too.  So far I've only talked with the nurse, so I have yet to actually talk to the doctor.  I will be seeing her in a few days and hope to relay my concerns at that time. It is hard to give up the control, though, you know? Especially with something that we want oh so badly. 

HollyGolightly09

@merrylea  I know what you mean. I know it's 100% normal, but I don't want to wait 10 weeks for another ultra sound. I just want to say "Don't y'all know this is the most important thing in the world?!?" 

Xath

@merrylea Do you have any medical contacts in your EBDB who can help you out?

In all seriousness though, discuss these concerns and your anxiety with your doctor when you go in for your appointment.  A good practice will help you ease/resolve your concerns, either by doing some peace of mind testing or talking you through all of your questions.  

mamaelle27

In case anyone needs a little ray of sunshine, I'd been feeling really down the past couple of weeks, just so anxious, and I finally had my 8 week appointment Monday, and now I finally have some energy and cheer back. So, to those of you ladies in the early weeks, hang in there. I believe the anxiety gets better week by week and milestone by milestone (1st appt, 2nd appt, end of first trimester, etc). 

thatlauragirl

Wish I had advice, but just wanted to assure you that you're not alone. If you find your anxiety affecting your ability to function normally, please know there are specialized counselors out there that can help you through this. Please take care of yourself!

wifeinraleigh28

I'll jump in a commiserate with all the anxiety! I feel like after each appointment I get a day or two of relief, and then the anxiety creeps back in. At yesterday's ultrasound we were told that the baby is measuring right on track and that the heartbeat "looks good." Yesterday I felt amazing, but today I can feel the anxiety building up again. My fertility clinic isn't able to tell us the exact heart rate, so now my mind is filled with worry... what if when I see the OB next week they say the heart rate is behind?? When will this anxiety ever end? My guess is never.

HollyGolightly09

I read something yesterday that I found interesting... thought you ladies might, too. Apparently among women who already have issues with anxiety, pregnancy makes it worse for 50%. I do have some anxiety issues in general, so it was kind of comforting to me to know it isn't completely crazy of me to be feeling more anxious now. 

kelseycookies84

Hey ladies,

Just came from the doctor. All still looks good. Of course it's very early, but comforting to know I've made it this far. Sending calming vibes to everyone! 

xoxo