How do you stay positive?

rainbowwishes5

After 2 consecutive losses I can't help but feel I'll continually keep losing my babies. That it is inevitable. How do you stay positive or try to be positive? I'm sure we all struggle. Does anyone have any good coping strategies?? I try looking at PGAL but I just figure that will never be me, that I'm not lucky like that.

Boots&Co

It's really really really hard. I've had 3 losses myself, the last one being in April, and I'm just pulling myself back together and getting back on the baby train. It takes time, and support, and maybe an adventure to reset your mind. I've had a lot of long walks in the woods by myself to reflect on my feelings and work on my emotional strength. No one understands unless you've gone through it. Sending lots of love and strength your way. 

rainbowwishes5

Thank you. I'm so sorry for your losses.

dpjennifer

@rainbowwishes5 I've had 2 losses and I have this fear as well.  I see the people come and go and also feel like that may not ever be me.  But, I know that I want to have a baby so I feel like the only thing I can do is keep trying.  I tell myself that 2 could be a fluke.  That I could've just gotten the short end of the stick twice.  That I just haven't had a successful pregnancy YET.  I also tell myself that if I get pregnant and have a 3rd miscarriage, that I'll be able to get testing and so if there is a problem, hopefully they can identify it and work with me so I can then go on to have a successful pregnancy.  I keep trying and I keep having hope because that's the only thing to do.  The only other option is to give up, but I don't feel that would be better because I'm still going to get a period every cycle anyway, and I'm still going to be upset over that, so I may as well at least try and hope for the best outcome available. 

TScalei

Ditto pretty much everything that dpjennifer said. I have had 2 losses as well but I am going through RPL testing now. I just keep telling myself that this is what I want more than anything in the world and somehow someway I will be a mother some day. I just keep focusing on stages to get too - hearing the babies heartbeat for the first time and how that will finally feel, finally being able to put the announcement on facebook...etc. And I am just determined to get to those stages where I know everything will mean so much more to me now. This process has also taught me that I am stronger than I have ever thought so I know I can do it - we are all some tough ladies who have gone through stuff people can only imagine.

I also try to keep myself distracted I read a lot and try to plan fun things for DH and I to do on the weekend to keep busy. I am already trying to think of a little weekend trip or something for November to lessen the blow of a possible BFN.

rainbowwishes5

Thank you ladies. Yes, it's one foot in front of the other and keep swimming I guess. Next ovulation we're cleared to try again so I'm so very nervous. But there really is no alternative for me- that's true.

NewMommyCoop

@rainbowwishes5 I try to stay positive by continuing to do the things I enjoy. I am also using this time to get into better shape, so my body handles the pregnancy well. I also remind myself, a lot, that nature took its course and I miscarried because the baby was not going to be normal. It helps me to remember that most likely I had the losses because of chromosome issues and that I would have much rather it happen early rather than late in pregnancy. (I don't know if I have explained it well, sorry).