Second Baby

ShortStuff5

How did you decide to have a second baby? How did you know when the time was right? We planned our first baby and would much like to try for a second I just go back and forth when I'm ready. I would like to get a house first because we only have a two bedroom duplex and one room is daddys computer/work room so baby girls crib is in our room where we all sleep together so space is an issue for me. I know we can't put having a family on hold for a wants list like a job with more money a house a van etc because then we would put a baby off for a long time. We both are ready but we do occasionally think twice especially me being a stay at home mom and main care taker of our 9 month old daughter doing everything day in and day out. We also dont want them super far apart either but don't want to miss out on her either. I feel like the decision to have one child is easy I feel it's way more difficult to continue adding children lol.

Moore2love2014

Well, my husband and I decided we would start trying for our second after we bought our house. We/I didn't want to be living in an apartment with two baby's. So I think that was our biggest thing when it came down to trying. We only tried for two months and are pregnant. I didn't think it would happen that fast. But, you guys do what you want. If you know you are ready for your second then go for it! Only you know when the right time is, no one else does. 

TRA0816

In the same boat, I am 33 and he is 36 so time is a factor for us. We agreed I'd stop my birth control in November. I am terrified but excited. we have a house but it is a very small space as well. 

BarrettJ89

My kiddos are 13 months apart. Second babe was definitely NOT planned. In my opinion, if you and your SO have any second guesses, wait it out a little bit. Plus, moving with 2 babies is hell on earth. We moved when my son was 16 months and my daughter was 3 months. The amount of stuff to move is insane, plus, one person is always on baby duty and can't do much helping (or at least that's how it was in my case). I wish we had waited for baby #2 because I feel like my son missed out on a lot because I was big, pregnant, and miserable. Plus, my daughter was not, and still isn't, an easy baby, meaning I can't always do the things I want to with him because of her... I have a lot of guilt about it. 

On the other end, I love my babies and wouldn't trade them for the world. I'm sleep deprived, addicted to coffee, have a squishy mom-bod, and can't remember what it's like to sleep in bed with my SO (and not be too tired for intimacy), but the bond I see between those babies is worth every second. There is something special between them. They keep me on my toes and keep my sides hurting from laughter. They share, they play games, they give kisses, and I am so grateful. I try to take pictures of every one of the sweet moments to save for the teenage years when they "hate" each other

maureenmce

We're thinking of trying for baby number 2 when LO is 18 months.  That's the minimum for me for health reasons (my endocrinologist thinks my postpartum thyroiditis will FINALLY be under control in the next 3-4 months, then she wants me to wait 6 months to make sure it's really rock solid before TTC.) 

That said, we may wait longer, depending on career stuff/house stuff.  I always thought we'd have to wait until we can buy a house before having a second baby, but a couple in our apartment building just had a second kid and lives in the same exact size 2 bedroom apartment we do, and housing prices are INSANE in LA, so maybe I shouldn't hinge our TTC on that.  The jury is still out though.  I will be 36 this month so I don't want to wait too long, especially if I want to consider the possibility of 3 instead of just 2.  (Which I kind of do, though my husband is not 100% convinced yet.)

So much to think about!

cali1710

I always always always wanted my kids close together. Until I had one. Now I'm even debating having a second. I know we will though but it wont be until next fall that we try I think. Not that shes a bad baby, shes actually a dream! I'm just having a hard time thinking about sharing her with another child. I just want to devote my attention strictly to her. And she will be at a fun age next summer so I want to enjoy that with her and not be pregnant or carrying around a couple month old. 

BarrettJ89

cali1710 said:

And she will be at a fun age next summer so I want to enjoy that with her and not be pregnant or carrying around a couple month old. 

This. Lol parking lots are a nightmare! My one year old weighs over 30 lbs and often times, there are no carts in the parking lot. I have to either carry the car seat with Brynlee, the diaper bag, plus Cohen (my 1 yo), or trust my son to walk and not plop in the parking lot! I'm super anxious about getting Brynlee into a convertible car seat because I know I can only get one kiddo into a car seat at a time... and what in the world do I do with the other?! It sounds ridiculous, but seriously, these are the scenarios my mom brain comes up with... no more babes for me. 

Rakastajatar

I'm 38 years old and had a tubal, and I want a second one. TIME isn't on my side at all. I'll trade anyone younger! haha.  I just need to convince my DH to get a TR or IVF hopefully by the time i'm 40 I can have a second. We'll see. maybe we'll adopt. I want a second when she is older like 18months or 2 years old.  

All the best to you!