Hitting..

vibarra27

OMG! So the boys dont hit eachother as much as before but they've picked up on hitting me!

I redirect, tell them its not nice to hit. I tell them keep their hands to themselves while moving their hands away and putting their hand on their side. I tell them not to hit as i move away and it doesnt work. They laugh! They think its so hilarious, and the more i redirect and i get my "mad mommy" voice on the harder they hit me,  laugh, or turn to hit eachother. 

Idk what to do

missliz53

We've introduced time-outs. She's not hitting us yet, but all of our hard work practicing being nice to the kitties hasn't paid off yet. We try redirecting or ending the activity, but if that doesn't work then I give her a warning and put her in her pack n play with toys for a few minutes. Not so much as a think about what you've done, but just as a container to keep her from going back to whatever she's not supposed to be doing. 

BabyBugutsky

Following this because my LO is hitting and biting. He thinks it's super funny! We say ouch and not to hit and bite but he keeps doing it. If he's really bad that's when I take his toys away and put him in his play pen for a time out. I've been told consistency is key but I want to nip this in the butt before he gets worse. 

vibarra27

Thank you ladies! Imma try the crib and playpen time-out. Yesterday DD helped me by suggesting to pretend to hit me infront of them and when she did, I told her "no we don't hit " in a loud firm voice.  My son that was hitting me at the moment looked @ her, then back @ me (while i looked angry) and he put his hand down & looked away. Haven't gotten hit today lol. Don't know if it was cus of sissys wonderful acting or they're just not in the mood lol.

rachelkawesome

There's also the option of ignoring them and redirecting- it's hard when they are hurting you/each other, but the attention they get when you tell them to stop might be egging them on. 

vibarra27

rachelkawesome said:

There's also the option of ignoring them and redirecting- it's hard when they are hurting you/each other, but the attention they get when you tell them to stop might be egging them on. 

I agree cus they just laugh when i say no hitting and all that...

RobsMrs77

Mummy abuse!!! - totally there with you ladies! Jakey bites, pinches, slaps, head butts and back hands me! The pain from biting is instant. I can't help but yell from the "pinch" like pain. When I tell him "no!, we don't bite mummy, Jakey" he puts his head down and cries.... like I'm the bad one! 

Yiggle09

Oh yes the biting. Usually I catch him as he's leaning down to do it and I say don't you dare bite mommy. It usually works. He's smacked my face as well.

hlb8179

My ped said at this age babies may be too young for their own time out so instead we put ourselves in timeout. He explained that our attention is their biggest reward so the best negative reinforcement is to take that away. When LO has bit me, I set her down and walk away for a minute.  She had done it three times in one week about a month ago, right around when she turned 1, and hasn't done it since.  

vibarra27

@RobsMrs77 omg he goes all out lol. And one of my boys does the same SOMETIMES where he cries cus i say "thats enough i already told you we dont hit its not nice" then his bottom lip curls up and he cries for 5 seconds lol.

@Yiggle09 omg the biting is starting now too. Not as bad as the hitting. But Adriel(twin B ) bit Alan(twin A) on his finger the other day amd left 2 bite marks. My poor son cried his heart out! And smacking in the face is the problem i have with them but ive notices theg only do it when hubbys around...hmmm..

@hlb8179 that makes sense as well! Thanks!

kmcshane0211

Time out is not advised this young. Honestly, reinforcing this behavior by giving it attention is truly a slippery slope. And setting you and your child up for failure by trying to discipline through time outs this young (which is developmentally not appropriate for this age) is also a slippery slope to more undesirable behavior, etc. I think people REALLY a underestimate the impact inappropriate discipline methods can have on a child's development, self-esteem, the relationship within the family, etc. I'd really really caution you on this one. Look up "positive discipline" and use instead. 

Here's an example of how this approach reframed something as common as being overly negative by saying "no" a lot. https://www.google.com/amp/amp.parents.com/toddlers-preschoolers/discipline/tips/saying-no-to-no/?client=safari

ABombard12

When you all say "hitting" is it also more of a shoving? My LO has started to like push me out of the way when he wants something if I am standing over/in front of it to block him, or if we don't pick him up when he wants to he will keep pushing us over and over until he gets his way (we make him use his words during this time for "up please").  He is also doing this to kids at daycare... if they are using a toy he wants or even just sees them playing with he will go over take it/shove them off of it.    Trying to figure out if this is him 'hitting' or just being a non-sharer and how to handle it.  This is hard because he is a big boy and younger than the one kid at daycare who is 3 and he shoves him he is about the same size as my son ha and LUCKILY my friends son so I haven't made any enemies from other moms -- she is understanding but still!

missliz53

I think they can do either or both. We haven't had this issue yet, just a meltdown when I wouldn't ler her take another kid's snack, but the other kids in her toddler class seem to either be shovers or hitters, especially the ones with older siblings. I'm not sure if it's because she's an only child and doesn't have to compete with siblings or that's just her personality. 

vibarra27

@missliz53 i say/do the same things to the boys when they shove as i do when they hit. My sons are @ that stage where they take things away from eachother and hit if they dont get what the other had. Also, my boy's dont walk yet so when theyre cruising and one is trying to get somewhere and the other is in the way they push eachother. 


The taking toys from others or eachother i take it away and say "he/she had it first you can get it when theyre done with it." and i hand it back to whoever had it first and i say it maybe 2 times before they understand & crawl away to find something else to play with. Same with the pushing "say excuse me and go around thats not nice." I know half the time they dont entirely understand but i knownrepeating myself as much as i do theyll catch on lol.