First Time Pregnancy Help

Tinkerbell23

Hi, I am 23 years old and I found out I was pregnant the day before my 23rd birthday. Now, I am approximately 9 weeks pregnant and I have my first dr appointment tomorrow morning. My boyfriend wants me to get an abortion and I don't want an abortion, never believed in killing a being growing inside me. Now, I know everyone is going to say do what I believe in and c what makes  me happy. Before I found out I was having pretty much all the symptoms of being pregnant except the sore breasts. My friend actually bought me a test because I looked to her like I had the sick pregnant look. I just thought I was getting sick from over working myself with two jobs. I'm scared and nervous about the baby and the appointment tomorrow. I so want this baby. I've grown so attached to him/her already. He/she is already the size of a cherry and I know that if I have an abortion it's going to destroy me. Any and all feedback is welcome. Thank you and I'm so sorry this was long.

meggyme

Tinkerbell23 said:

Hi, I am 23 years old and I found out I was pregnant the day before my 23rd birthday. Now, I am approximately 9 weeks pregnant and I have my first dr appointment tomorrow morning. My boyfriend wants me to get an abortion and I don't want an abortion, never believed in killing a being growing inside me. Now, I know everyone is going to say do what I believe in and c what makes  me happy. Before I found out I was having pretty much all the symptoms of being pregnant except the sore breasts. My friend actually bought me a test because I looked to her like I had the sick pregnant look. I just thought I was getting sick from over working myself with two jobs. I'm scared and nervous about the baby and the appointment tomorrow. I so want this baby. I've grown so attached to him/her already. He/she is already the size of a cherry and I know that if I have an abortion it's going to destroy me. Any and all feedback is welcome. Thank you and I'm so sorry this was long.

If this is something you want and are prepared to deal with for better or worse and you think you can provide a good life for your baby, then go for it. Just make sure you think it through very well and start building a support system.

eggplantface

Tinkerbell23 said:

Hi, I am 23 years old and I found out I was pregnant the day before my 23rd birthday. Now, I am approximately 9 weeks pregnant and I have my first dr appointment tomorrow morning. My boyfriend wants me to get an abortion and I don't want an abortion, never believed in killing a being growing inside me. Now, I know everyone is going to say do what I believe in and c what makes  me happy. Before I found out I was having pretty much all the symptoms of being pregnant except the sore breasts. My friend actually bought me a test because I looked to her like I had the sick pregnant look. I just thought I was getting sick from over working myself with two jobs. I'm scared and nervous about the baby and the appointment tomorrow. I so want this baby. I've grown so attached to him/her already. He/she is already the size of a cherry and I know that if I have an abortion it's going to destroy me. Any and all feedback is welcome. Thank you and I'm so sorry this was long.

You need to talk to your boyfriend and literally anyone else in your life who knows you personally, and NOT internet strangers. We can't begin to give you advice; I don't even know what advice you want. Encouragement to keep the baby no matter what? To have an abortion? To give it up for adoption? It's just not fair to ask that of people who don't know you or your circumstances.

I can tell you in general that babies are a ton of work under the best of circumstances, so as cute as they are in their onesies they're also screaming, crying poop machines that need constant care and money. Lots of money.

NamelessAria

If you don't want an abortion don't let anyone talk you in to having one. If you really feel like having an abortion would destroy you then absolutely don't do it. It's your body and you do what you want with it. If you want to have the baby then you have every right to have your baby.

If you don't want to raise the baby I promise you there are a lot of amazing couples out there suffering from infertility who can't have children of their own. I know some of them personally and the couples I know would make AMAZING parents. So if you don't want an abortion and you don't want to raise the child might I suggest putting the baby up for adoption? 

If you do want to keep the baby and you feel you can provide him/her with a good life then by all means keep the baby! Your boyfriend doesn't have to agree with you. Plenty of women raise a child on their own. It may not be ideal and it may not be easy but it is doable. And if it's what you want then I say go for it. Ya know, assuming you'd be able to provide for baby. There are a lot of government aid programs available to help pregnant women and mothers. If you need some assistance you may want to look into some of the programs available. Someone can correct me if I'm wrong here but I think you can contact a social worker to discuss your options in terms of government assistance.

I wish you all the very best!

ETA: Like others have said you may find it helpful to talk to the people in your life and get some opinions from other people. But in the end it's your life and your decision. And even if everyone else thinks you should get an abortion and you feel like it isn't right for you: don't do it. In the end in life you have to do what is right for you and your baby.

SmrBrd2012

NamelessAria said:

If you don't want an abortion don't let anyone talk you in to having one. If you really feel like having an abortion would destroy you then absolutely don't do it. It's your body and you do what you want with it. If you want to have the baby then you have every right to have your baby.

If you don't want to raise the baby I promise you there are a lot of amazing couples out there suffering from infertility who can't have children of their own. I know some of them personally and the couples I know would make AMAZING parents. So if you don't want an abortion and you don't want to raise the child might I suggest putting the baby up for adoption? 

If you do want to keep the baby and you feel you can provide him/her with a good life then by all means keep the baby! Your boyfriend doesn't have to agree with you. Plenty of women raise a child on their own. It may not be ideal and it may not be easy but it is doable. And if it's what you want then I say go for it. Ya know, assuming you'd be able to provide for baby. There are a lot of government aid programs available to help pregnant women and mothers. If you need some assistance you may want to look into some of the programs available. Someone can correct me if I'm wrong here but I think you can contact a social worker to discuss your options in terms of government assistance.

I wish you all the very best!

ETA: Like others have said you may find it helpful to talk to the people in your life and get some opinions from other people. But in the end it's your life and your decision. And even if everyone else thinks you should get an abortion and you feel like it isn't right for you: don't do it. In the end in life you have to do what is right for you and your baby.

All of this, especially the bolded. Good luck!

SaphireSweetie88

Tinkerbell23 said:

Hi, I am 23 years old and I found out I was pregnant the day before my 23rd birthday. Now, I am approximately 9 weeks pregnant and I have my first dr appointment tomorrow morning. My boyfriend wants me to get an abortion and I don't want an abortion, never believed in killing a being growing inside me. Now, I know everyone is going to say do what I believe in and c what makes  me happy. Before I found out I was having pretty much all the symptoms of being pregnant except the sore breasts. My friend actually bought me a test because I looked to her like I had the sick pregnant look. I just thought I was getting sick from over working myself with two jobs. I'm scared and nervous about the baby and the appointment tomorrow. I so want this baby. I've grown so attached to him/her already. He/she is already the size of a cherry and I know that if I have an abortion it's going to destroy me. Any and all feedback is welcome. Thank you and I'm so sorry this was long.

I am sorry you're being pressured by your boyfriend but ultimately the choice is yours. Only you know what you want BUT based on the bolded parts, it seems like you may already know what you want to do.

charliegirl816

It's normal to be scared and nervous when you know you're going to have a baby! There are a lot of moms on sites like this that can help answer questions you may have, so you're not alone.  It is wonderful that you want to keep your baby and realize what the consequences could be otherwise. You are strong and brave and will do great, just take it one day at a time!!!