The Politics Post - Page 10 — The Bump
February 2017 Moms

The Politics Post


Re: The Politics Post

  • It just doesn't make any sense wtf a ban on Iran they've never done anything. H thinks they're just trying to stir shit and it's not even thought out. 
  • It was definitely not thought out. Not one bit. I'm so sorry that this hits so close to home for you. I cannot imagine how you or your H feels. 
  • Like many of you. I am so worried about our country. Trump is literally following the fascist handbook right now. I want to resist. But I am so busy growing this human that I don't feel like I can. 

    I'm usually really politically active so it is turning into invisible emotional labor. All day every day people (co-workers, my interns, friends, family) call, text or interrupt my day to say things to me like, "Can you believe Trump today?" and I have to ask "Which thing are you talking about?" BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY. And then they want to talk and it makes me upset all over again. 
  • I always thought the slide into fascism would be more gradual...
  • Yesterday, DH and I got into a bit of a fight over how to deal with my Dad visiting once the baby comes.  My dad supported Trump, which is causing DH to want him not to see the LO.  I've been told that at the very least my dad will be getting a lecture on how awful Trump is and why supporting him was akin to being a racist.

    Now, I'm not happy to admit that my dad was publicly supporting Trump and all of his ideals.  But, I think that stirring up trouble when he comes to visit his grandbaby for the first time isn't the best way to handle it.  Now I feel like I have to either have my dad visit when DH is not going to be around or I need to have a talk with my dad to set expectations.  Problem is, I'm pretty sure my 60-something YO dad isn't going to appreciate being lectured at by my husband.

    I don't come from a family where political debates ever happen...  I was actually surprised to see my dad take a public stance at all.  DH and his family are the opposite and debate politics all the time; so, he's much more comfortable with the idea of bringing this up and stating his opinions.

    Mostly, I feel like this isn't something I want to be worrying about at this point.  Reading the daily news is upsetting enough and I don't want my new family bonds to be broken before they even have a chance.
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Trying to convince H to go to a protest at our state house later. It's near both our home and delivery hospital. I want to do SOMETHING. I can't just sit around this house and be pissed anymore. I don't really want to go alone at 9 months pregnant though. 

  • @MLRocha my inlaws also were very supportive of Trump (ikr? It's so awful) but I wouldn't DREAM of lecturing them about their choice. It's not my place and it's frankly disrespectful. 
    Your husband needs to take a seat on this one. 
    Same and same. We just avoid the topic and all is well. 
  • Agreed, @MLRocha. My extended family is pro-Trump and we just don't talk about politics. It's definitely upsetting, but not a reason to keep him from your baby assuming you'd otherwise want him there. 

  • I'm with your husband @MLRocha ;

    if youre coming to my house and supporting a fucking Muslim ban you should probably not be coming over. 
  • @MLRocha I have family members who are huge Trump supporters (immigrant origins! from one of the countries on the list originally! THE DOUBLE STANDARDS ARE INSANE) and I'm struggling with the same issue. Luckily they're not immediate family, but I'll have to see them at some point... and I really am dreading it. There's no easy answer. 
  • GretchypooGretchypoo
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited January 2017
    @MLRocha that is so frustrating. I think the kid of the parent gets to make the decision, personally. So you decide your comfort level and boundaries and H should go with it. 

    Being a Trump supporter doesn't mean you're going to abuse my kid. But I agree, if Grandpa comes in bragging about how Trump is making America great again or says something racist/homophpbic/etc. you should reserve the right to ask him to leave. 

    Also, if H wants to tell your dad what he thinks consider letting him do so. Esp if your dad has been so public with his support. But the 1st meeting of your LO is not the right time or place.

    Just for reference, I had a bunch of super Evangelical Christians in my family. Very conservative quiver-full type religious. They did try to "teach" me and my sister some things. My parents just spent a lot of time talking to us about how people believed different things and they thought my Aunts and Uncles' line of thinking was dangerous and why. 

    ETA: And my mom did kick my Aunt out of our house once when she said gay ppl should be put to death. Tolerance only goes so far.
  • Thanks everybody for their thoughts on this.  I think that the biggest issue I have is with DH wanting to bring politics up from the beginning, without seeing if my dad will just be in the moment, focused on the baby, etc.

    I know that everyone is keyed up at this point.  There are more and more reasons to be angry every day.  I know this will blow up at some point; I'd just prefer it not to be at the hospital right after I've given birth to our first child.

    @Gretchypoo - This is a very good point.  I know that religion will be another part of life where we get a lot of inputs (probably from both sides of the family) and are going to have to fight for our own beliefs and sharing them with LO.  My mom is already asking where baby will learn about God if we're not getting him/her baptized/christened.  Never mind the fact that I was never baptized.

    I think that setting expectations about what's allowed to be discussed in our house, in front of our child, is going to be the key to making this work.  I guess because it wasn't an issue in the past, I've been kind of naive thinking that we could go on ignoring differences and having surface peace.
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Interesting PSA concerning the lack of paid family leave in the US:
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Pretty sure our president and press secretary don't know that Frederick Douglass is dead and has been dead since 1895........
    Me: 36, H: 37
    FTM, 2 Furbabies
    married 03/17/07
    lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
    due: 2/15/17
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