January 2016 Moms

So, this happened.....

Denver (D) has always co-slept with us since he finished his jaundice treatments 2ish weeks after we brought him home. He's almost 9 months and I convinced SO to *finally* set up D's crib (in our room... let's not get crazy) about two weeks ago. D HATES his crib and likes to think of it as a playground instead of a bed. As much as I try he will not sleep in it. But I usually just put him in there so I can do a load of laundry, use the bathroom etc 
*fast forward to today at around 12:45pm*
im washing clothes, getting things done packing D's bag for the baby sitter thinking about my trip to sams (kinda like Costco or BJs -- if you were wondering) the urge strikes to use the bathroom. Denver is happily playing in his crib, so I use the bathroom. 
My master bathroom doesn't have a door (why I do not know) so I have a clear view of D and his crib. His crib is on a wall and there is enough for my body to fit sideways between the crib and my bed ( not much space) *SO and I had made plans to take down the crib on Monday* anyway - D was pulling himself up and falling backwards and I'm watching him from my "throne" and he starts to reach for the blankets on my bed  - he would reach and lose his balance and fall backwards... 
i took my eye off him for ONE second -I don't even know what I looked at- 

i will never forget the sound of my son falling head in between my bed.. hitting the side rail and landing on the floor... 
in that moment I couldn't breathe I couldn't think speak anything. 
I tripped over my pants and scooped my crying baby off the floor and I sobbed.... 
my worse nightmare happened... I'm home alone I should have known not to put him in there... I should have put him in his jumper- 10 mins before this happened I walked down the hall and struggled to open his big box of wipes.  
He was on the floor half under my bed and I barely could pick him up without hitting his head again on the bottom of the bed. 
He has a huge lump close to his soft spot and I'm monitoring him for a concussion. 

I know, babies are resilliant, it wasn't my fault- but I feel so guilty.... what if it happened 10 mins earlier when I was down the hall.. or he fell two milimeters above where he hit... what if something worse happened- he cracked his skull and it shifted.... 
i keep tellling him I'm so so sorry. 
I feel like the worst mommy because I was THERE I was not even three feet away from him... 
im 5'7 the crib comes up to my arm pits that's how far he fell. 

Im thankful he's ok-  and 12hrs later no sign of concussion so far. 
But, here I am... still feeling guilty still upset...

Re: So, this happened.....

  • @carlyhammond oh my goodness...I'm so sorry you had to go through that!!! First, i am positive every mom on here would feel exactly as you do...and im sure this is the first of many times you'll have the guilty feeling (one of the mommyhood perks). However, this wasn't your fault. You couldn't have known it was going to happen and luckily you were there when it mattered to help your little boy.  If it were your SO, I'm sure you wouldn't blame them so you can't blame yourself. Sending good thoughts for you and LO! 
  • My little guy fell out of the crib last weekend. The weekend before we were supposed to lower it but didn't. I feel your pain. Don't feel guilty. It happens
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  • Poor little guy! And mommy! I went through something similar a few weeks ago. I was getting ready for work and put our LO on my bed where my husband was waking up (but eyes still closed)I told him to keep an eye on her and he grunted. Not a good sign.  I walked across the hall to her room to get something and I hear the worst thud! She rolled off our bed! With DH in it! I was literally 10 feet away. I cried longer than she did! Pretty sure she got over it quickly. I gave her tylenol and she went right back to playing after we soothed her a bit. DH and I felt awful!!! I know how you feel. Even a few weeks removed, I feel guilty BUT she's doing great and won't even remember this incident. 
  • It happens!! Don't feel guilty! I know easier said then done but you're a great mom! 
  • The same thing could have happened to me.  I put DS down for a nap and left the room.  10 minutes later, I happened to glance at the baby monitor and he was standing up, leaning all the way over the railing of the crib.  I've never run so fast in my life.  Up to that point, I hadn't even known he could stand.  If I hadn't randomly looked at the monitor, he would have been on the floor.
    You're not a bad mom at all!  Babies have a knack for getting themselves I to trouble even when you're hovering right over them. It sounds like your son is going to be fine.
  • I'm so sorry @carlyhammond! I can only imagine how you felt, and we've all been there (or will be eventually!). 

    Can I ask what setting you all have the crib on? Our LO can pull to stand but hasn't done it in the crib yet. We have it on the middle setting, so when I stand him to pick him up the rail is about at his armpits. Now I'm wondering if we should have it on the lowest setting already. 
  • We have ours at the lowest setting - it feels safest. 
    Baby Birthday Ticker TickerMarried DW <3 08.2013; AI 2x; IUI 6x; IUI #7 05.2015; DD born 2.2016 o:); Reciprocal IVF FET #1 on 11.18.2020 
  • We now have ours on the lowest t
  • We also went to the lowest setting
  • It was such a pain to lower it the first time that we decided then to go from highest to lowest setting an de haven't looked back. 
  • Thanks ladies! We moved it to the lowest setting before his next nap :)
  • Oh @carlyhammond, you're absolutely not alone. One morning, Brynlee woke up, so I went to grab her, and by the time I came back across the hallway, my one year old woke up. I handed her off to SO, so that I could grab the toddler. He flooded his diaper, so I went straight downstairs. As I'm downstairs with the toddler and my stepdaughter, I hear the most awful thud, then the baby screaming. I don't even remember touching the stairs! SO set her in the middle of our bed to grab a shirt... and somehow, she found her way to the edge (and down!). Our bed is set extremely high as it has storage underneath. Like, "I need a step stool to get into bed" height... and we have hard wood floors. Awful, awful feeling. SO said she fell flat on her butt, but I was terrified about her back bring jarred. We watched her extremely close and gave her tylenol. She was back to standing and being silly like usual, but that sound still haunts me. 
  • Been there. Worst feeling ever. Ella has now fallen off our bed twice (now she isn't allowed on it.) This last time, I was sitting on the floor with my back towards her and my husband was standing at the foot of the bed, packing for our camping trip. Yet still, she managed to propelled herself off, head first to the floor right behind me. I'm even getting shooken up now remembering it! I was so devistated I even thought her low grade temp the next day was bc of it, totally not. I asked my friend to run it by a ped ED doc at work lol. We have all been there, good thing these kids are so resilient!!
  • @carlyhammond Please forgive yourself. I promise you that many moms have a story where they looked away and their LOs fell or hurt themselves. It happens. If you must, let this be a teaching moment for you, hug your sweet baby, and move on. I hope he's doing ok and you are too!

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • I'm fairly certain it was on the last setting (it's taken apart and in the spare room now) 
    its now about 36hrs after the "incident" and I'm pretty sure he's ok. 
    After it happened he wasn't acting like himself, he was quiet- he was playing but he wasn't talking much (talking as in babbling) he was pale and not himself. He woke up on his own last night and was coherent and this morning he woke up and I could just tell he was feeling better. He's laughing, talking, playing and he's more of himself. 
    No exorcist vomits he waking up great, his pedi said that for babies after 6months to monitor for 24hrs but since there isn't that big of a difference between 6 and 8 months to watch him for 48. But I feel like he's ok.
    i however am watching him SO close, im so scared I was lucky this time and next time I won't be so lucky. 

    Also, D is a VERY tall baby. He doesn't look like he's 8 months at all ( even the doctor commented he didn't look 8 months ) -and she said it was bound to happen because of his size and recommended I get a (I can't think of the actual term) play yard? It's the baby fence thing that goes in a circle and the baby can crawl and play in them...  but for now he will be in his jumper when i need to leave him alone. 
    Hug your babies tight ladies, they move faster than you think. 

  • These things happen! I'm so happy he is okay! Several weeks ago, Nolan and I were taking a nap on my bed. I got up, he was still sleeping, to see what time it was and had to walk out to the living room to get my phone. Not 30 seconds later, I heard a thump and a wail. Nolan must have awoken when I got up and crawled himself right off the bed. He was curled on his arms and knees on top of a tshirt on the tile floor. I have no idea how or where he landed and bumped. I never saw a mark on him and he was acting fine as the day went on. I felt so guilty, though. I thought he was sound asleep and I was going to lie back down with him.
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    Lilypie - FiGB
    Married DH 11/15/08
    Formerly MissMheMhe
  • Oh my gosh, you poor thing!  How scary!  I'm glad it looks like your little one is fine - don't beat yourself up about it - you were right there, just a few feet away, and accidents happen.  Hugs!
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