Talking about loss with expecting women? — The Bump
Late Term and Child Loss

Talking about loss with expecting women?

Today I shared a video about the silence of the topic of stillbirth and I have a few expecting women on my friends list. I have a feeling they were upset by this, should I feel bad for sharing? Should I have blocked it even though the point was to bring awareness? 

Re: Talking about loss with expecting women?

  • I don't think you should feel bad about doing something like posting an article on Facebook. People can choose to read or not. I've had it come up a couple times when friends have pregnancy complications that I can relate to (like bedrest), but I don't want to say anything because I can't say "don't worry I went through that and everything worked out ok!"

    i think we need to be sensitive (just like others need to be sensitive with us!) but not afraid or ashamed. I say be yourself and share what's on your heart!
  • Thank u so much for this reply :) @PabloAndChristine
  • I don't think you should feel bad at all for posting that video and don't let anyone guilt you into feeling bad. First of all, I am sorry if you've experienced a loss, and secondly, remember that most people look down on issues/experience they have no understanding of. I think it's important for women to bring awareness to these issues and to be able to express how they feel without fear of shame.

    Do not let any person allow you to second guess "how you are supposed to feel," or "supposed to act." I made that mistake when I allowed myself to become profoundly impacted by my friends/family's negative behavior after my loss. Unfortunately, until you experience it, you have no idea; even then, you don't get to decide how people are allowed to feel. Be yourself, you love, you have a heart, and be proud of it.  <3
  • I dont think you should feel bad at all, maybe it will cause a dialog that might help you in the long run. They might be more conscience of your feelings when they have their babies!
    People do not know how to deal with loss like we have all been through. My step-mom doesnt even know we named her and have her ashes, because she feels that at 19 weeks it is still a fetus not a baby! 
  • Don't allow others to change you or tell you how you should be. If you wanted to share - great! They can choose to view it or not.
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