Trying again after a loss

LadyB1984

hi ladies just thought I'd creat a new discussion for anyone who has recently had a loss and is on the ttc train again X I have just experienced my third miscarriage very early at 5 weeks  X I have three children ages 13,10 and nearly 2 it took 7 years to conceived my last baby X we Lost a baby at 16 weeks before I fell pregnant with him X it was horrendous however this time I feel guilty that I don't feel sad this time just more disappointed that my body has let me down X 

anyway I'm back on tht ttc train again and hoping it happens quick like the rest of us I suppose X would love to hear from anyone else who's just started ttc again X 

brooklyngirl18

hi, sorry for your loss. This whole board is dedicated to discussions revolving around ttc after a loss so I encourage you to check out the other threads and participate. 

2fitBees

I wish you the best @LadyB1984! I am awaiting my 5th AF after my second MC. I try to see the silver lining/ positivity in every situation, so now I see the opportunity to get debt free, go back to school and finish my degree, pay my car off, save up a down payment for a house, etc. So I'm not tracking/timing. Our families know about the first MC, but we refrained from telling them the second time I fell PG, so they have no idea about the second MC. Both of my Sister-in-laws are pregnant at the moment, and our families keep excitedly saying DH and I are next.  If only they knew the weight of their words.

DH and I are not preventing in any way, and I feel that I am healthy enough to TTC, but a third MC scares me. On the other hand, I keep telling myself that (given I fell PG right now) that we would have a whole 8-10 months to continue to pay off debt. I am also hesitant to start tracking/timing because I don't want to start an obsession.

I also mourned differently with the second MC than my first. My second due date wasn't as much of a hurdle as the first. My first due date felt like a milestone that I had to get past before we could try again or even feel completely healed. With my second MC I actually ended up passing the remaining tissue on my due date. It was heartbreaking to go through MC again, and for a while I felt like my body couldn't do anything that it was supposed to. What helped me get past that feeling was realizing that my body was able to actually get pregnant, which is a lot further than some women get, so I am thankful for that. I do feel that I was more concerned with getting healthy and back on track than I was with my first.

I think before I ever got PG, if I would have know that I was going to MC, then I would have never tried. I would have tried to prevent at all cost. I would not have known how strong I can actually be, and how good my body really is to me. I had so much faith in my second pregnancy. Even though it ended in MC as well, after mourning and healing, I still feel stronger than before. Although I wish I could have my two beautiful babies here with me now, I feel that I have learned from these experiences and I now have a heart for others going through it as well.

I am so sorry you have experienced the things you have- I hope to see you graduate from the TTCAL board