Monday BF and/or Tuesday TW 8/23

sourlemon

Combining these since we didnt have a BF yesterday. Just in case someone needs to complain! I know you're out there!

sourlemon

Idk if this is a BF or TW but my Facebook friend started a group for peddling LLR stuff and added me to it. I removed myself. 10 seconds later she added me back. Really? 

Also I'm a tw cuz it took 3 times editing the top post before it was finally free of typos! 

scatherinem

@sourlemon the same thing happened to me! It was about 2 weeks between my leaving the group and being re-added. So now I've left it twice. If I wanted your stuff I would request to join your group. (PS I totally want ALL the stuff. But sadly it's out of my normal price range ) 

slartybartfast

The crazy toddler on bath salts that bit my poor little guy's face two hours into his first day at daycare is the TW of the day for me. I get it I get it toddlers don't have words and often resort to biting to communicate BUT NOT TO MY BABY ON HIS FIRST DAY IN CHILDCARE WHEN I'M ALREADY AN EMOTIONAL WRECK!!!



BF that I went to go swim today - the fitness center is closed for the week for maintenance. Headed toward an outdoor pool to swim and between me going and getting close, the temp plummeted 10 degrees as the front that's supposed to come through this evening decided to show up early. So I'm taking a nap. Screw today.

sourlemon

@slartybartfast I hate daycare incidents. My DD got picked on a lot when she younger because she was so tiny. She would get pushed and knocked down when she was learning to walk and toys taken from her a lot. She's learned to stand up for herself a lot now but it took time. Sorry that happened on day 1. Also, toddlers in general are dictator-y jerks. Then they show their cute cuddly side. 

Austenista

My complaint of the day is just communication etiquette. Don't text me a bunch of questions/things to check out for you and then when I respond asking for clarification/some of the answers you need, and then needing to talk some of it out, wait about 36 hours later to respond or acknowledge me. You're busy, we all have lives. Ignoring someone's messages when they're trying to get things you need, though? That makes you the TW of my week. 

phoenix870509

My boss is driving me nuts! Getting mad at me for closing out an issue that was resolved that isn't according to him. So he's all mad at me because I should have made sure, and no matter what I say he doesn't believe me. So he's a TW on top of my tech team who needs to realize start time at 8am does NOT mean turn the phones on at 9am! It means the phones need to be on at 8! I have people complaining our hours say 8-5 but the message at 8:05 says office closed. Ugh, now I have to go yell at people and I'm pissed...

Kacie209

BF goes to my coworkers. We are swamped with work, like insanely busy. It doesn't help that I am not helping out with much since I am moving to a new department next week and can't really work on any cases. So, I do feel for them. I really do. BUT, they spent a good 30+ min this morning complaining about how busy they are, etc. And I'm thinking, why don't you spend that time working instead of chatting in group chat about the work that isn't getting done? IDK. I am also one who goes to work, gets her stuff done, and leaves. I rarely complain cos this is our job... sometimes we're busy and sometimes not. It's also called having good time management with what you have control of. Yes, it stinks waiting for another area to get back to you on something, so then work on the next thing on your list and so on. There is usually something you can catch a break on and feel like you did something to get ahead.

I hate calling my LO a TW, but he is! I had another U/S today, since they couldn't get a good measurement of his spine the last time. Well, he wasn't cooperating this time either so I have to get another one done next month. They don't have any big concerns, but just want to make sure... which I understand. I just am not looking forward to that bill. it was nice to see him again, and will be nice to see him again next month too.

LinziLoo09

My body is annoying me. I caught a baby daycare plague from DD over a week and a half ago, and I still have a pretty bad cough - though it's getting better. So last night I had a coughing fit while attempting to sleep, and I think I pulled a small abdominal muscle near my rib cage. It's hurting when I move, breathe, cough, etc. I'm just tired. Between the muscle, the virus, the kidney stones, and the pregnancy in general, I feel like a shell of a human being. I just want to feel better.

ETA: Thank you for starting this thread. I have wanted to complain for a while. I needed this thread.

sourlemon

@LinziLoo09 omg those darn daycare bugs are the worst. Our whole house has been a sick ugly mess for 3 weeks. Started with DH, 3 days later I got it, DH started to improve then DD got HFM, I started to improve and DD got the cough thing the adults had, and now DH has it again. 

Coughing when pregnant sucks! It hurts so bad and now I even pee-cough. And the baby hates it so she kicks me right after...in the lungs of course, which causes more coughing. I'm crossing my fingers it goes away completely soon...I'm at 80% better. Hope you get there too!

slartybartfast

@sourlemon I'll echo @LinziLoo09 's thanks for starting these. I need our weekly vent spots!!! 

kattyc-2

BF - been selected for jury duty tomorrow. Have to leave the house over an hour before I usually do to battle Atlanta traffic. Never served before so I'm hoping they're accommodating to my needs (eating & peeing all the damn time). 
Those who think I shouldn't complain about jury duty just bc I'm pregnant are TW.  

zubenescamali

ugh I really want to complain.  a huge regulatory agency is visiting us at work this week and causing me so much stress with their bs standards. trying to get people outside my department to follow policies is maddening, yet i'm responsible for them following them.  I have no authority but I have to answer to it. 
and MIL made meatloaf for dinner.  I hate meatloaf.  i know i should be grateful that she made dinner - especially since standing longer than 10 minutes grounds me for several hours with pain - but yuck. 

KateH1216

Work. Work is my BF/TW right now. I'm an engineer for a big company. My former boss (who was completely incompetent) left in April. When he resigned, they asked me to cover for our team. I was barely pregnant and not interested in sharing this fact at work at 6 weeks, so I accepted. Not a huge deal other than being crazy tired.

Fast forward to mid-June when my office partner was promoted to a different team. I was so super happy for him, but it meant that I would be covering for him too. My new boss came on board mid-July, but they still haven't replaced my office partner. Haven't even started interviewing actually.  I'm overworked (still doing the work of 2 people), tired, constipated and cranky. My only ask was that they replace my partner by Labor Day at the latest so I can train them before I go on leave (thanksgiving).  It's not looking good. On top of all this, it's our busy season, so shit is crazy busy and I'm trying to wrap up loose ends on projects before leave. It's lame. And I'm over it!

LinziLoo09

@sourlemon OMG the pee-coughing! I have always had a bladder of steel. All the way through my last pregnancy, I never dealt with frequent peeing, urgency, or leakage of any type. This go around...the opposite. I'm peeing at least twice an hour, and with the onset of the daycare plague, I'm pee-coughing. I'm already wearing panty liners most days, but I may need to upgrade to full pads if this keeps up. Kegals have done shit for me. And it's only going to get worse...

slartybartfast

LinziLoo09 said:

@sourlemon OMG the pee-coughing! I have always had a bladder of steel. All the way through my last pregnancy, I never dealt with frequent peeing, urgency, or leakage of any type. This go around...the opposite. I'm peeing at least twice an hour, and with the onset of the daycare plague, I'm pee-coughing. I'm already wearing panty liners most days, but I may need to upgrade to full pads if this keeps up. Kegals have done shit for me. And it's only going to get worse...

I remember your bladder of steel claims of first trimester. I remember the jealousy I felt. And now I welcome you, not with an "i told you so" face, but just sympathetic open arms, into club pee pee pants.

penelope4612

@KattyC - I think jury duty is always a good reason to complain, pregnant or not.  

dmontgo

BF would be work. I'm starting to do more writing and proposal assignments, and I asked my boss (who is the CEO) if we had any proposal templates already created. First she tells me that I'm "not being clear" with what I'm asking, so she sent me a Quote template. I reiterate that while the Quote template is helpful for that section of the proposal, I would really like our company's proposal template with sections for past performance, overview, etc. She tells me that she "doesn't understand what I'm asking for." OK, FINE.

So today I start creating a new template and writing this proposal...I let her know...and you know what she said? "Oh, we already have proposal templates created--no need to reinvent the wheel."

Um. Wtf. That's what I asked for yesterday!! I wasted 2 hours of my life making sure our template had the logos, GSA number, etc and now you tell me that I did all of that for nothing? Because I was being perfectly clear with what I needed to do my job, but you "didn't understand"?

Generally I have no issues at work, but that really pissed me off.

fauxpa-2

@KattyC Ugh! I had jury duty yesterday! If you make it to the questioning phase be sure and mention that you are pregnant and need frequent breaks.  They most likely won't even want to deal with the hassle of it but if for some reason you are actually chosen they will absolutely give you frequent breaks because they want you comfortable and able to pay attention. 

DiFazette

I'm going to lose my f-ing mind over car seats/strollers.  Sounds stupid,right.  Originally bought a double stroller system only to lean it's not small baby (forget preemie) friendly.  Promptly took back 3 boxes the sizes of a small sedan back to the store all by myself, because I'm freaking Shira (I probably lost those of you born much past 1986).

After doing diligent research, we (I) decide on Graco Click Connect 35 LX car seats.  Found them on sale and bought them.  Decided to use a Joovy Twin Roo+ (a frame stroller similar to the snap and go) since it's 'compatible' with my seats.  I then order adapters to make it 'compatible'.  Well, we tried playing with everything tonight and it's compatible, if you line it up to the hundredth of a centimeter -  it will work. 

Who had time for that shit?  I'm having twins and already wrestle a toddler.  What the hell?  I CAN NOT be messing with my car seat/stroller 10 times to get ONE car seat in it.  My son will be running across 4 lanes of traffic.  Why is this so hard?  Am I the first person having twins, ever?  I'm going to freak out over this.  

dmontgo

@DiFazette What you just described sounded like baby quantum mechanics, and I started sweating. 

I obviously have no advice, but you are a smart lady--you can do anything!

DiFazette

@dmontgo I had no idea it would be this hard.  Very few companies make compatible sets for twins like they do for singles.  And the ones that do are crazy expensive because - 2 babies, let's rake you over the coals twice!  I just want to find something with awesomely safe car seats that work with a stroller that isn't the size on my shed and doesn't weigh 50 lbs.  I guess I'm asking for too much.  

Where my twin moms at?  What are you guys doing?  SOS!!!

ea301

@KateH1216 just curious but what type of engineer are you? My hubs is in the market for a new job so maybe he could fill your teammate's open position? Only downside is that he would be taking a bit of leave around the same time as you

kattyc-2

Thanks for the advice @Fauxpa!

princesslockness

@DiFazette have you looked into a leash/backpack for your DS? That is the only way I will ever take L anywhere anymore. I can lengthen it to about 10ft or shorten it to about 4.

DiFazette

@KateH1216 sorry your work is a TW right now BUT... There are few things I love more than a woman rocking a male dominated industry.  I know we've got a few around here - Engineering, IT, Programming, scientific studies - I love seeing women excel in those roles.  There are no 'male' jobs!!  

sourlemon

@LinziLoo09 I had a bladder of steel before my first pregnancy. Then the sniss and pee-cough became regulars. I'm a firm non-practicer of kegals...lazy...but my ability to keep it together returned a few months after delivery. 

Considering the pee-cough has started so much earlier this time than with my first, I'm not as hopeful. Oh well. Still too lazy for kegals. 

KateH1216

Thanks @DiFazette!  I take great pride in the fact that I was one of 5 women engineers in my graduating class. I worked damn hard for this degree!

@ea301 I'm an industrial engineer with an emphasis in supply chain/logistics. I have been doing this since 2002 for two very large corporations (I'm old ).

My team is made up of industrial, manufacturing and mechanical engineers. I'm the only woman on my team of 10. And one of 4 in our larger engineering/automation design team of 48 people. Some days I feel like a superhero and others ( like today) I throw my hands up and wonder if it's all worth it!  *for the record, being a woman in a male-dominated industry will always be worth it to me. We can do anything as good (often times better) than men...we just have to have the opportunity. And I will gladly preach that to this baby girl and my step daughters ALL. DAY. LONG. 

DiFazette

@Kate08Young no.  Not my favorite option to be honest - no judgement, just not my preference. He'll be closer to 4 than 3 by the time the babies come so I'm hopeful we can work until then on listening through independent measures.  If he's still darting on me then though, all bets are off.  I have seen improvement over the past few months, so I'm hopeful.  

princesslockness

@DiFazette I swore I would never use one. BUT now L can crawl faster than I can get around. Today I turned to put his diaper bag down and he was up 6 rows of bleachers. I had my mom pick one up on her way home. Not playing that game anymore.

jennbaylor12

@DiFazette - I'm no help on the twins front but I did want to say we had a Graco Click Connect with DS and loved it! Our new one just arrived on Sunday and I'm beyond thrilled - they're really great carseat!
I'm sorry it's so complicated to use the Click Connect feature with 2

ea301

@KateH1216 lol, I'm old too so don't worry about that! Your job sounds awesome. It is one of my all time regrets that I didn't get an engineering degree, but I have spent the majority of my career in IT (also alongside mostly men) simply because I have the aptitude for it. Maybe one day I'll get formally educated. Maybe

Unfortunately DH is on the systems engineering/IT side too, so neither of us can help your work problems. I hope they're able to hire someone to offload some of your work soon! 

DiFazette

@jennbaylor12 thanks!  I polled my twin moms group and quite a few recommended a double click connect.  

dmontgo

@ea301 Same field as you! Been doing a lot of network engineering  (I have a computer degree & MBA), but if you really wanna piss the guys off, get those certs! My old job started sending me to do them because I could pass first-time go when the dude bros were failing. Oh man you would have thought I took away their man card.

Honestly the certs would make a bigger impact than the degree, IMO! You go girl--we're awesome.

ea301

haha! Love it! @dmontgo I will definitely check into certs... I have an MS in Technology Management but that's obviously not a technical degree, just teaches you how to deal with people in technology (dude bros - ha). Any schools or training you would recommend?

dmontgo

@ea301 I would start with the companies your partnered with. The big ones tend to be Cisco, Juniper, Brocade, and VMWare. If you are a gold partner especially, they give huge discounts for certification classes and tests--your company should pay for them since they would be considered professional development. A lot of the courses you can do online (they are live so you can ask questions), but if you need to be in class then they usually have an in-person class.

Ciena and McAfee are another good place to start because they usually aren't as intensive or hard as those big certs--you can get your feet wet and see what's out there (that's what I did!). 

I'm currently on cert burnout because I had do so many back to back so we could grab some projects, but generally you can take 6 months to prepare for any tests. I'm branching out and working on other things I like, such as technical writing, for now. 

Good luck! 

ea301

@dmontgo taking notes! I am actually unemployed at the moment (laid off from a small startup, so my former company wouldn't have been able to provide those classes anyway!) but my husband may be able to take advantage of MANY of these for free through his company... Thank you!!

ETA: I was actually a tech writer for many years! I loved it! Look into Plain Language training - it is super valuable and teaches you to cut your writing down to bare bones so that people understand it. I should probably refresh myself on that skill... I've found myself getting pretty wordy at times

dmontgo

@ea301 No problem! Always glad to help a fellow lady techie.

I'll look into that book! I did academic research writing for a long time, so in many ways tech writing is a breath of fresh air because it doesn't have to be so wordy--but it's definitely an art!

LinziLoo09

It's not Monday or Tuesday, but I have another bitch/TW. The hospital where I'm supposed to give birth has decided to arbitrarily change its "best practices" on water labor/birth, VBAC, and eating/drinking during labor. I say arbitrary because they're only doing it to my provider - who doesn't have any record of sanctions of negative outcomes in his practice and is regularly voted as the best OB in my area. It seems like it's an entirely political thing, but they are essentially forcing women to have c-sections and imposing very outdated and uneducated practices on a group that wants their birth preferences honored. The OB is doing VBACs at another hospital now, but that hospital has even more outdated practices with regard to water birth and eating (and they generally try to coerce all women to have pitocin). 

One of my friends who uses the same OB and is due in just 3 weeks is organizing some massive protests. But overall I'm just feeling really disheartened. I'm particularly worried about the food. I wouldn't have had the energy to give birth had my midwife not given me food during my super long labor last time. I've heard that they can't legally take away food if you bring it; they can just coerce and guilt you. But I'm annoyed to know that it's likely I'll come up against push back of any type. Labor and delivery is already very difficult without having your hospital staff be unsupportive and punitive regarding your decisions. I'm feeling really frustrated.

slartybartfast

@DiFazette I'm not having twins and I'm BOGGLED by strollers. I get them used because I want to be able to shed them when I find something that actually feels right. I want all the features in one lightweight stroller that fits into the trunk of my civic.

Anyways have you looked at craigslist? You can't just take it back if it doesn't work and reselling is a hastle but you can find things at good enough prices that if it doesn't work out... oh well...

DiFazette

@slartybartfast unfortunately twin strollers that take two infant car seats are not easy to come by, then you're faced with the compatibility question.  So few strollers take 2 infant seats.... It's bullshit!!