UPDATE - scan today. I'm so freaking nervous.

amwangel

I have terrible ultrasound PTSD. I'm going for my viability scan today at the same place I found out at my anatomy scan that the baby wasn't going to make it. I'm not feeling as nauseous as I was a few days ago, so I'm convinced it's not going to go well and I'll have my 4th loss. How the heck will I pass the time today? How will I not die of anxiety? Will the universe finally give me some good news?? (I feel like I'm due. As I'm sure we all do!)


Update! Okay, heartbeat is there. Due date is April 2nd like I thought! So far so good. I can exhale. For today.

ceclarlinetlo

Ugh. I'm so sorry - I know that feeling all to well. I don't really have any advice I'm afraid just take the day as I comes, hour by hour. What time is your scan? We are all rooting for you!! 

waterfall213

I hope you get good news today! Sending positive, happy thoughts your way! 

amwangel

It's at 2pm eastern! So 3 hours.

lilp2015

I was the same way every time. I had u/s almost every week during my pregnancy. My dr put me on Zoloft cause I had myself convinced every week that it was over. She said she wanted me to enjoy the pregnancy. It def helped a lot. I would also schedule my appt for first thing in the morning so I didn't have all day to think the worst. She's 2 months old today and worth every second of it! Best wishes!!

amwangel

The lady doing my ultrasound is the same one who had to tell me my baby was going to die at my anatomy scan. NOT HELPFUL FOR MY PTSD. AIII!

amwangel

lilp2015 said:

I was the same way every time. I had u/s almost every week during my pregnancy. My dr put me on Zoloft cause I had myself convinced every week that it was over. She said she wanted me to enjoy the pregnancy. It def helped a lot. I would also schedule my appt for first thing in the morning so I didn't have all day to think the worst. She's 2 months old today and worth every second of it! Best wishes!!

Convinced every week it's over. TOTALLY me. 

lilp2015

amwangel said:

The lady doing my ultrasound is the same one who had to tell me my baby was going to die at my anatomy scan. NOT HELPFUL FOR MY PTSD. AIII!

Sorry to hear that. My ob's office has just 1 lady who does them. She was the one who told me both times we had lost the baby. As sad as it was it was also nice to see the same face every time and talk about things. She was very encouraging and kept saying we are bringing this baby home. She also personally understood what I had been through as she had multiple losses but unfortunely wasn't able to ever have children of her own. ( she's older now so not as many options when she was trying). Thoughts and prayers!

KyCade3013

Glad everything went well today!!

MWoodside

Great update!

amwangel

KyCade3013 said:

Glad everything went well today!!

Thanks. the relief lasted about 4 hours and now I'm convinced again that sometning is wrong. (Not as nauseous.) Holding on to hope!

KyCade3013

Noo!! Try to stay positive, I am the same way. Hoping it lets up after 12 weeks.