Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

A Poem for Those Who've Lost a Child Before They Even Got to Meet Them

I wrote this a few days after my miscarriage and it was very therapeutic for me, I hope it can bring others some healing too.

I never got to see your face
Or hear you laugh and cry
I never got to hold your hand
Or see the color of your eyes
I never got to hug you...
Or call you by your name
I never got to brush your hair
Or heal the booboo's that caused you pain
I never got to play with you
Or watch you crawl and walk
I never got to read you stories
Or teach you how to talk
I never got to watch you learn
Or send you off to school
I never got to read your report cards
Or take you to the zoo
I never got to meet your friends
Or take you to a sleep over
I never taught you to ride a bike
Or watch your eyes grow wide with wonder
I never got to hold you close
Or hear about the crush you had
I never got to teach you to drive
Or take you to the school dance
I never got to meet your teachers
Or watch you graduate
I never got to read your acceptance letter
Or watch you do something great
I never got to meet your someone special
Or see the diamond ring
I never got to help with plans
Or help with anything
I never got to hear you say I do
Or watch you drive to your honeymoon
I never got to hear about the trip
Or tell you to come visit soon
I never got to hear your own child's voice
Or hold the newly born part of you
I never got to share parenting tips
Or help when you didn't know what to do
A lifetime of nevers
A lifetime of pain
A lifetime of wonders
Of how to be whole again
I only knew about you
For such a short amount of time
But I loved you more than anything
And I'll love you till I die
Oh Lord please hear my voice
Hold my child close to you, is my plea
Comfort them with Your love
And tell them all about me
Tell them how I love them so
And tell them how I look
Tell them of my many quirks
And of my love for books
Tell them how much I love You
And how You saved my life
Tell them of my victories
And tell them of my strife
Now please hold me too, Lord
And keep me by Your side
Because how can I go on living
When my baby had to die
Give me Your comfort Lord
And give me Your peace
Let me know You are close
And never leave me
My baby is in heaven now
No longer in my womb
But I can think of no place better
For my child's own first room
Give my child a tight hug
And give them a gentle kiss
Tell them I will see them again, but until then
Not a day will go by that they aren't missed

-Written by Courtney Hartleib July 2016

Me: 29 DH: 30Married 07/05/2008TTC since 09/2013IUI: Oct. 17 2015 BFN: 11/05/15IUI: June 14 2016 BFP: 07/04/16 (Miscarried07/06/16)IUI: Sep. 21 2016 BFN: 10/05/16IUI: Oct. 24 2016 BFN: 10/29/16IUI: Nov. 11 2016 BFN: 11/25/16IUI Feb. 26 2018 BFN: 03/08/18 (First IUI with meds)IUI March 26 2018 BFP: 04/10/18Furbaby: Copper (Shiba Inu) 3 years old


Re: A Poem for Those Who've Lost a Child Before They Even Got to Meet Them

  • I'm so sorry for your lost. The poem is beautiful 
  • Sorry for your loss, I love the poem, it is beautiful...

    Me: 38 DH: 42.
    Married: 9/2008.
    4/2010 - BFP (Natural)
    12/2010 - DS born.
    8/2014-TTC#2 
    10/2014 BFP
    10/2014 Confirmed MC at 5 weeks
    5/2015 BFP
    8/2015 MMC & D&C at 13 weeks  :'(
    11/2015 BFP then CP at 6 weeks.
    3/2016 Started IVF+PGS
    4/2016 ER, only 5 eggs but 3 Frozen embryos made it to freeze. Only 1 PGS normal embryo.
    DOR
    Hypothyroidism
    MTHFR
    DH Sperm with Chromosomal Issues (high % FISH)
    AMH .65
    8/2016 FET #1 BFN
    9/2016 IVF-ER #2  1 normal embryo.
    11/2016 IVF-ER #3  0 Embryos
    2/2017 FET #2 BFP CP at 6 weeks.
    5/2017  BFP Natural. 3 Betas were ok. First US 5-31-2017. Hope it sticks and is healthy!!


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  • Im so sorry for your loss.  Thank you for sharing your beautiful poem.  I shared it with my DH and he finally opened up about his feelings.  Your poem hit so many of the things I was thinking.  Thank you 
  • All the tears. Absolutely beautiful. Thank you for sharing.

    Me: 27 years old            DH: 27 years old
    Type 1 Diabetes since 2001, MTHFR hetero A1298T
    Dogs: Raider 4 yrs, Dex 4 yrs
    Married in July 2014
    TTC #1 since late Feb 2016
    BFP #1 3/29/16     MMC: 5/5/16
    BFP #2 7/6/16    SCH, D&C 8/4/16
    BFP #3 12/26/16     EDD: 9/6/17
    My Chart / My Diabetes/Pregnancy Blog
    My Type 1/TTC/Pregnancy Podcast: 
    Juicebox Podcast Episode 118
    A1Cs:
    1/12/16 6.7%
    5/25/16 6.0%
    11/2/16 6.1%
    3/22/16 5.8%
    4/27/17 5.4%
    6/13/17 5.3%
               
    "Sugar Fancy Tutu"
  • Thank you everyone for your kind words. I am so very sorry for each and every single one of your losses. Please feel free to share this poem, I know that each one of us has felt all of these things. I'm so glad that the poem has helped you all. I'm praying for each of us!
    Me: 29 DH: 30Married 07/05/2008TTC since 09/2013IUI: Oct. 17 2015 BFN: 11/05/15IUI: June 14 2016 BFP: 07/04/16 (Miscarried07/06/16)IUI: Sep. 21 2016 BFN: 10/05/16IUI: Oct. 24 2016 BFN: 10/29/16IUI: Nov. 11 2016 BFN: 11/25/16IUI Feb. 26 2018 BFN: 03/08/18 (First IUI with meds)IUI March 26 2018 BFP: 04/10/18Furbaby: Copper (Shiba Inu) 3 years old


  • Thank you so much for pouring your heart out and sharing this beautiful piece with us. 
    I'm 29, husband is 30
    Together since 2006
    Married 01.17.15  <3

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 

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