When I said I wanted to compare them it was for my own information, out of my own curiosity. Not so I could inform others one is worse than the other. Every single person experiences pain differently. My migraine pain and kidney stone pain definitely wasn't in the same place or caused by the same thing, but I can compare them myself and say, "I definitely enjoyed this less than that." That's all.
I totally got what you meant. Before labor with DS, I was wanting to see how it compared to the effort of say... a marathon or something. I'd heard from some that "think about it like a marathon and not a sprint" - whatever, it was nothing like any of that. It was so different. It really is a COMPLETELY different experience.
Even though I've been through labor before I'm still wondering how the heck it's going to be. Especially knowing it can be so different each time.
Interesting, thanks for sharing that. It will be interesting to see what your perception is during a different birth @slartybartfast My description is best described as a general overview of all my births... I've had one particularly painful and stressful birth and one particularly easy birth but I generally throw both out and use my other two as probably what's my average "normal" for me. I agree, I felt totally cheated with my hardest birth, particularly since if came after my easiest one... "Isn't it suppose to get easier"... My new focus is just to accept what comes and not have too many expectations.
i'm a few days late but I haven't had much chance to bump this week. working some long and weird hours and busy with the kids.
1 - How far along are you? almost 21 weeks 2 - Overall, how is pregnancy going this week? back pain and reflux are dominating. i'm not having so much heartburn as I am having burning in my throat/esophagus real high up no matter what i eat. everything is giving me reflux, even the "safe" foods. I don't remember it being this bad this early, I thought I had another month. 3 - Are you gonna eat it? (Your placenta) yes, if I can get someone to encapsulate it for me (and the placenta is healthy). I felt like it helped post-partum last time, even if it was placebo effect.
BTDT bonus: did you eat/drink during labor last time? If so, what foods/drinks? once I was in active labor (about 2 hours in) I really didn't care about eating. before that, during the putzy stage, all i wanted was a breakfast sandwich. by the time DH got me one i didn't want it anymore. while i labored at home for the next 8 hours I drank water and Gatorade but kept throwing up. laboring in the hospital was so painful that I DGAF about eating or drinking. once I succumbed to the epidural though, I got really hungry. i sucked on lifesavers and snuck in a few sips of water here and there. i don't remember what crappy meal they gave me to eat after she was born but it was the most amazing food ever.
as far as my labors have gone, i wouldn't have described them as "intense" or "pressure". that shit hurt. i have read that women who go med free have different memories of the pain of labor than women that get epidurals. i don't remember why, and it seems to me that maybe women who get epidurals are actually in "more" pain, relative to their tolerance, but this stuck with me because it seemed to be their memory of pain, not the actual pain. i have always thought that might be why women who go med-free describe labor in less painful terms, because their memories and coping is different. i hope i can go med-free so i can compare the two.
@zubenescamali i think there was a study done on med-free and medicated mothers perceptions of pain and overall feelings about birth done a few years ago (I'll try to find it) that had those findings. From what I remember med-free women generally describe being in less pain and feeling more satisfied with their birth no matter the outcome and one of the questions that the study posed was were they actually in less pain (obviously not) or that they just weren't preoccupied or concerned about pain... As a personal goal for birth (perhaps). Basically, that pain management/avoidance wasn't the focus of their satisfaction associated with their birth. Or did they have more of the benefits of the hormones linked with making post birth a more harmonious time and that cause them to "forget" the pain and feel more satisfied? It's a valid question... My husband totally thinks it's the later... And is like "honey, you just don't remember how horrible it is... I do!" Haha! Either way, I'm glad I feel good about it, whatever happened.
However, with my hardest birth, it did stick with me! We didn't have another for 6 years after that, mostly because i couldn't stand the thought of going through that again... And that midwife who "wronged" me at that birth... No feelings of love toward her like i do my other midwives... She's dead to me!
Any thoughts on the first meal after birth? Like, did any of you have this planned out, or was it more of a "Here is what I'm craving" or "Here is what we have in the house" thing? I want it to be as mind-blowing as possible
Me: 31 | DH: 31
Together since 2003 | Married 2010 TTC #1 January 2016 BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016 Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018 BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
Any thoughts on the first meal after birth? Like, did any of you have this planned out, or was it more of a "Here is what I'm craving" or "Here is what we have in the house" thing? I want it to be as mind-blowing as possible
I was starving so the nurse gave me some crackers and juice. Once we got settled I to our room, I had DH go out and get me Chili's and it was delicious. Sinice it was later at night and the cafe at the hospital was already closed the nurses had some sandwiches that I could have but I didn't want them.
@PensiveCrayon Rule in my family is you don't show up at the hospital to visit a baby without at least calling to ask what food is requested. Not sure what I'll feel like yet, but grandma can't see her grandson unless she's got some grub for mama
That's intriguing... And not the one I read. @zubenescamali I haven't had time to look for it, but I will.
@PensiveCrayon I'm planning on having a light meal post birth. Both times with my home birth I've requested peanut butter on toast, a fruit smoothy and an over easy egg. It was heavenly! (And easy to keep on hand). Both times my midwife made it and I just put the stuff in one spot so they could find it. The thing is that if you have the baby in the night getting quality take out might be hard, so I plan to have food on hand, even if it's something like a smoothy. (Which is nice to have if you are a "vocalizer" like me because moaning for 4-16 hours can make your throat hurt... Imagine that?) For my second meal, after some sleep, I usually tuck away something like chicken pot pie (my parents brought that with my 3rd) or huevos rancheros (husband made the morning after my 4th)... By that point I'm ravenous and want something a bit more hearty. You could also pre-make what you want and freeze it and then get to out when you think you're in true labor to thaw. By the time you have the baby it will probably be ready to be heated for you. I agree that whoever comes to visit you soon after (close people like moms or sister) ought to be told to bring good food for you ... And for your husband... He will likely be hungry too.
...speaking of the husband... while you may not be very interested in eating during much of labor, he probably will. We literally had multiple discussions of how, in the days after 38 weeks, we were going to eat non-adventurous foods because we didn't want to be dealing with digestive distress in either of us during this time. We packed food for my husband to eat at the hospital during labor.
However, when the time came, he seemed to only think about eating the Mexican food there and ended up feeling like crap after two days of nothing but hospital burritos and tacos...
So yea. Husband food choices matter too. I'm hoping DH learned his lesson.
Also, if you're at home, I think it's considerate to ask your midwives if there's anything they can't eat/avoid and stock up a meal for them... If you have a long labor they will all need to eat and will rotate caring for you and resting/eating. I also stock up on coffee and tea and set out a new mug for them with their names on it and some honey straws and a package of almonds or such. I know some ladies who get a whole spread like veggie platter and meat/cheese and bread... How they manage that in early labor is beyond me, but we also don't live with in 20+ miles of a store, so that's probably the big difference.
@maamawaabangi If anything, shopping & preparing for a spread like that seems like it would be a nice way to take my mind off early labor for a bit! I'm already hoping to figure out a good list of funny movies and YouTube sketches to help.
Me: 31 | DH: 31
Together since 2003 | Married 2010 TTC #1 January 2016 BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016 Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018 BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
Has anyone ever done/is anyone thinking about music or scripture/worship or similar (meditation? if you're not religious) for motivation during birth? How did they work or how are you planning to use it?
I've heard of people doing that for encouragement, though I'm not sure how I would react to it, if it would be positive or negative. I'm thinking something like the sound of rainfall or ocean waves drowning out everything might be helpful for me to not get overwhelmed and focus on the task at hand. Just considering the options.
I'm going to bring my copy of Pink Floyd's "Pulse" concert and let it play during labor. It's very soothing for me, and Ashton being born to Pink Floyd seems fitting.
@caseyewhitaker I'm just going to stock my phone up with everything/Spotify and steal my moms speakers. Maybe I'll find the sounds of wandering stream calming. Or maybe I'll be blasting some dance music to pump me up. All I know is FI can't veto my music choice for once
Has anyone ever done/is anyone thinking about music or scripture/worship or similar (meditation? if you're not religious) for motivation during birth? How did they work or how are you planning to use it?
I've heard of people doing that for encouragement, though I'm not sure how I would react to it, if it would be positive or negative. I'm thinking something like the sound of rainfall or ocean waves drowning out everything might be helpful for me to not get overwhelmed and focus on the task at hand. Just considering the options.
Yes. It was an amazing part of my last labor. I'll stick this question on this weeks thread so we can get more responses and I'll describe what I did.
@caseyewhitaker I'm planning on playing Orthodox hymns/chants through my labor. I HOPE this works! They're very relaxing, especially when they're low enough to just be background noise. Also, I'm in the church choir, so I'll be able to sing along to some of the pieces.
Me: 31 | DH: 31
Together since 2003 | Married 2010 TTC #1 January 2016 BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016 Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018 BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
Music in early labor is nice... but after things get going I can't stand it. Too much stimulus!!! It's just silence from then until I hear my baby cry! But, yes... done that.
Re: Med-free Check-in 8-11
Before labor with DS, I was wanting to see how it compared to the effort of say... a marathon or something. I'd heard from some that "think about it like a marathon and not a sprint" - whatever, it was nothing like any of that. It was so different. It really is a COMPLETELY different experience.
Even though I've been through labor before I'm still wondering how the heck it's going to be. Especially knowing it can be so different each time.
My description is best described as a general overview of all my births... I've had one particularly painful and stressful birth and one particularly easy birth but I generally throw both out and use my other two as probably what's my average "normal" for me.
I agree, I felt totally cheated with my hardest birth, particularly since if came after my easiest one... "Isn't it suppose to get easier"...
My new focus is just to accept what comes and not have too many expectations.
Due December 27th with baby #7
1 - How far along are you? almost 21 weeks
2 - Overall, how is pregnancy going this week? back pain and reflux are dominating. i'm not having so much heartburn as I am having burning in my throat/esophagus real high up no matter what i eat. everything is giving me reflux, even the "safe" foods. I don't remember it being this bad this early, I thought I had another month.
3 - Are you gonna eat it? (Your placenta) yes, if I can get someone to encapsulate it for me (and the placenta is healthy). I felt like it helped post-partum last time, even if it was placebo effect.
BTDT bonus: did you eat/drink during labor last time? If so, what foods/drinks? once I was in active labor (about 2 hours in) I really didn't care about eating. before that, during the putzy stage, all i wanted was a breakfast sandwich. by the time DH got me one i didn't want it anymore. while i labored at home for the next 8 hours I drank water and Gatorade but kept throwing up. laboring in the hospital was so painful that I DGAF about eating or drinking. once I succumbed to the epidural though, I got really hungry. i sucked on lifesavers and snuck in a few sips of water here and there. i don't remember what crappy meal they gave me to eat after she was born but it was the most amazing food ever.
as far as my labors have gone, i wouldn't have described them as "intense" or "pressure". that shit hurt. i have read that women who go med free have different memories of the pain of labor than women that get epidurals. i don't remember why, and it seems to me that maybe women who get epidurals are actually in "more" pain, relative to their tolerance, but this stuck with me because it seemed to be their memory of pain, not the actual pain. i have always thought that might be why women who go med-free describe labor in less painful terms, because their memories and coping is different. i hope i can go med-free so i can compare the two.
My Wedding Bio!
i think there was a study done on med-free and medicated mothers perceptions of pain and overall feelings about birth done a few years ago (I'll try to find it) that had those findings. From what I remember med-free women generally describe being in less pain and feeling more satisfied with their birth no matter the outcome and one of the questions that the study posed was were they actually in less pain (obviously not) or that they just weren't preoccupied or concerned about pain... As a personal goal for birth (perhaps). Basically, that pain management/avoidance wasn't the focus of their satisfaction associated with their birth. Or did they have more of the benefits of the hormones linked with making post birth a more harmonious time and that cause them to "forget" the pain and feel more satisfied?
It's a valid question... My husband totally thinks it's the later... And is like "honey, you just don't remember how horrible it is... I do!" Haha!
Either way, I'm glad I feel good about it, whatever happened.
However, with my hardest birth, it did stick with me! We didn't have another for 6 years after that, mostly because i couldn't stand the thought of going through that again... And that midwife who "wronged" me at that birth... No feelings of love toward her like i do my other midwives... She's dead to me!
Due December 27th with baby #7
https://nursingbirth.com/2009/03/30/study-finds-that-memory-of-labor-pain-is-influenced-by-a-womans-childbirth-experience/
My Wedding Bio!
TTC #1 January 2016
BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016
Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018
BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
TTC #1 January 2016
BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016
Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018
BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
I haven't had time to look for it, but I will.
@PensiveCrayon I'm planning on having a light meal post birth. Both times with my home birth I've requested peanut butter on toast, a fruit smoothy and an over easy egg. It was heavenly! (And easy to keep on hand). Both times my midwife made it and I just put the stuff in one spot so they could find it. The thing is that if you have the baby in the night getting quality take out might be hard, so I plan to have food on hand, even if it's something like a smoothy. (Which is nice to have if you are a "vocalizer" like me because moaning for 4-16 hours can make your throat hurt... Imagine that?)
For my second meal, after some sleep, I usually tuck away something like chicken pot pie (my parents brought that with my 3rd) or huevos rancheros (husband made the morning after my 4th)... By that point I'm ravenous and want something a bit more hearty. You could also pre-make what you want and freeze it and then get to out when you think you're in true labor to thaw. By the time you have the baby it will probably be ready to be heated for you.
I agree that whoever comes to visit you soon after (close people like moms or sister) ought to be told to bring good food for you ... And for your husband... He will likely be hungry too.
Due December 27th with baby #7
We literally had multiple discussions of how, in the days after 38 weeks, we were going to eat non-adventurous foods because we didn't want to be dealing with digestive distress in either of us during this time. We packed food for my husband to eat at the hospital during labor.
However, when the time came, he seemed to only think about eating the Mexican food there and ended up feeling like crap after two days of nothing but hospital burritos and tacos...
So yea. Husband food choices matter too. I'm hoping DH learned his lesson.
Also, if you're at home, I think it's considerate to ask your midwives if there's anything they can't eat/avoid and stock up a meal for them... If you have a long labor they will all need to eat and will rotate caring for you and resting/eating. I also stock up on coffee and tea and set out a new mug for them with their names on it and some honey straws and a package of almonds or such.
I know some ladies who get a whole spread like veggie platter and meat/cheese and bread... How they manage that in early labor is beyond me, but we also don't live with in 20+ miles of a store, so that's probably the big difference.
Due December 27th with baby #7
TTC #1 January 2016
BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016
Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018
BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
I've heard of people doing that for encouragement, though I'm not sure how I would react to it, if it would be positive or negative. I'm thinking something like the sound of rainfall or ocean waves drowning out everything might be helpful for me to not get overwhelmed and focus on the task at hand. Just considering the options.
TTC #1 January 2016
BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016
Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018
BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
Due December 27th with baby #7