17 DPO, No AF, BFN, Temps still above cover....what to do?

kelly_jeanne

Hey all,
We're in our 2nd month trying, the first time I was a crazy symptom spotter; but this time since my fertile signs were all weak, I didn't really think it could have worked (at home ICI) so I sort of stopped paying attention (except for temp and occasional CM check).  But now I'm 17DPO, AF is 4-5 days late and I don't feel like AF is coming at all.  My temps have been erratic (see chart below) but predominantly above cover...and above cover right now.  I've been HPT every other day since 10DPO and they have all been negative - I've taken two frer and two wondfo.  I woke up this morning just before my 6am temping alarm with overwhelming nausea, to the point where I thought I'd gag from the thermometer.  I took my temp and then went and sat in the bathroom for a while feeling nauseated and a little constipated...and then went back to bed and passed out for 5 HOURS (woke up at 11 )  My GYN is IMPOSSIBLE to get an appointment with unless you book months in advance, isn't open when I can go now that school has started again (I'm a teacher), and rolls her eyes about FAM- she's about drugs and letting her be in charge.  So I'm feeling pretty torn.  I thought maybe I pegged my ov wrong, but no other point in my chart passes the 3 over 6 rule, and although my OPKS never gave a strong positive, they had lines and then no lines during my EWCM time.  So I feel like we did the best we could with timing, but now feel a little WTF about the rest.  I don't know if I should keep POAS, if I should try to change dr, or what.  Are there any charting mavens out there who can give me a second set of eyes?  Also, any other feedback welcome.  Thanks and fingers crossed for all the TTC ladies out there!

kelly_jeanne

Oh - and I've been temping since January, my luteal phases have always been 12 days except for one that was 13 - so 17 is way over.

SnobunnieMel

kelly_jeanne said:

Hey all,
We're in our 2nd month trying, the first time I was a crazy symptom spotter; but this time since my fertile signs were all weak, I didn't really think it could have worked (at home ICI) so I sort of stopped paying attention (except for temp and occasional CM check).  But now I'm 17DPO, AF is 4-5 days late and I don't feel like AF is coming at all.  My temps have been erratic (see chart below) but predominantly above cover...and above cover right now.  I've been HPT every other day since 10DPO and they have all been negative - I've taken two frer and two wondfo.  I woke up this morning just before my 6am temping alarm with overwhelming nausea, to the point where I thought I'd gag from the thermometer.  I took my temp and then went and sat in the bathroom for a while feeling nauseated and a little constipated...and then went back to bed and passed out for 5 HOURS (woke up at 11 )  My GYN is IMPOSSIBLE to get an appointment with unless you book months in advance, isn't open when I can go now that school has started again (I'm a teacher), and rolls her eyes about FAM- she's about drugs and letting her be in charge.  So I'm feeling pretty torn.  I thought maybe I pegged my ov wrong, but no other point in my chart passes the 3 over 6 rule, and although my OPKS never gave a strong positive, they had lines and then no lines during my EWCM time.  So I feel like we did the best we could with timing, but now feel a little WTF about the rest.  I don't know if I should keep POAS, if I should try to change dr, or what.  Are there any charting mavens out there who can give me a second set of eyes?  Also, any other feedback welcome.  Thanks and baby dust to everyone!

QFP

First of all, please do NOT use the phrase baby dust on this board. It is incredibly offensive to anyone who may have had to creamate a lost pregnancy. That is very clearly outlined in the newbie guide. 

Second, this type of post does not need its own entire thread. This would go great over in the TWW

im not sure if you are recently off BCP which can take your body time to regulate, but if tests are negative, then you are not pregnant. I recommend following up with a doctor if your period is not arrived in a few days. 

NamelessAria

Welcome! Hopefully your stay here is pleasantly short.

I'm going to second not using the phrase "baby dust." I know you were just trying to be nice but some of our members find the phrase triggering. Because of that we, as a community, politely ask that you use phrases such as "good luck to everyone!" or "hopefully you all get your BFPs soon!" or something instead of "baby dust."

I guess my first question with your chart would be are you temping correctly? Same time every morning on at least 3 hours of sleep? And around when ovulated was marked did you have anything that might artificially elevate temps such as an illness, drinking the night before, poor sleep, etc?

If all those temps are solid then it would be hard for me to pick another O date.

I'm assuming your luteal phase is usually very short if you're 17DPO and your period is 4-5 days late. For what it's worth my last several cycles I've had a lot of variation in my luteal phase length. I know it isn't "normal" for your luteal phase to vary but it can happen. Mine has fluctuated from 13-16 days, as confirmed by temping and such. So it's possible that you'll get your period today and you just had a really long luteal phase for some reason.

If you're thinking you may be pregnant I'd say it's really unlikely. Even with a later implantation date you'd had a positive test by 17DPO. 

Edit: removed QFP since someone beat me to it.

SnobunnieMel

@NamelessAria I gotcha!!

kelly_jeanne

Thanks for the input ladies - I haven't been on BCP in 15 years and so I don't think that is a factor, I also temp at 6am every day with an alarm and am rarely awake past 11 - so as much as I can control, I'm temping per guidelines.  My luteal phase is usually 12 with an occasional 13 - and so AF is definitely usually here by now.   It's super frustrating to have such an unavailable doctor.  I'd really like her input.  I literally probably can't go until like October without taking time off of school, and during the first few weeks; I'm loathe to do that. 

[Deleted User]

Let me see here...
<img src="https://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/a5/b0/a6/a5b0a6e7bb4611840ab5aea9146c611b.jpg" alt="" height="404" width="291">
I agree that the temps don't show a lot of other possible clues, except that you did not actually have a positive OPK around the time as your EWCM.  It's possible that your body was gearing up to O and then didn't, temps get a little weird, and then BAM big rise on CD25.  You may say I'm grasping at straws here, but to my eye, those post-O temps are still pretty wild, perhaps too wild to be trusted, and - for argument's sake, could almost even be annovulatory.  Temps can be affected by all kinds of things, even under the best circumstances.   There are no more CM notations, just two days of EWCM, and - not being sure how reliable CM usually is for you - there's still no positive OPK anywhere in sight.  So hypothetically, you could be at more like 10DPO with crap timing, no positive tests, and if your LP is about 12-13 days, then AF is most likely on her way.  (The start of a new school year can totally cause fatigue.)  Or heck, if you throw out that other wild spike, maybe it's CD28 and you're like 7DPO.  Or maybe you didn't ovulate at all.  It's possible for a folli to start to develop but not quite fully release so the corpus luteum does not properly develop and produce the nice progesterone-driven sustained rise pattern.
<img src="https://karipatterson.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/i-dont-know.jpeg" alt="" height="273" width="364">
Also this.
<img title="Image: https://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/i-dont-know-whats-more-awkward-answering-dora-or-sitting-in-slience.jpg" src="https://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/i-dont-know-whats-more-awkward-answering-dora-or-sitting-in-slience.jpg" alt="">

If you are not turning a test, you are not pregnant at this time.  Please don't waste your OB's time by calling to tell her you have a negative HPT and no AF until closer to 60 days.  By all means, intro and/or jump right into the TWW and you will get to know a whole host of lovely ladies who will happily CS and cheer for your BFP, but be forewarned, this type of post historically does not go over well, and it is against TOU to ask the community if you are pregnant, even in a roundabout way.  GL!
<img src="https://tse4.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.M00c02b283807e91543ad8282e84160ebH2&pid=15.1&P=0&w=264&h=177" alt="" height="262" width="394">
*edited bc TB ate my awesome dora meme

eggplantface

What @BusinessWife said. Also, if you end up being pregnant, please don't come back and update us.

tripledaggerWed95976

Agreed with what everyone else said so I won't repeat anything other than that If u are truly 17dpo and getting negatives I would say you are not going to get a bfp this cycle.  

[Deleted User]

Seconding that this should probably be in the TWW (two week wait) thread.

This is quite an interesting chart.  It's strange that you didn't turn an OPK positive - have you turned them positive in previous months?  I am also really surprised by how rocky your temps have been post assumed O day.  Have you changed what blankets you sleep with, fans in your room, ac settings?

I have noticed that because the summer is getting hotter my temp this cycle is not lowering very much.  Have you seen any spotting whatsoever? 

If you are still getting negative tests on 17 DPO unfortunately I don't see any possible way for you to get a BFP this cycle.  I would wait until you hit CD60 and then make an appointment with your doctor if you are still getting negative HPTs and haven't had any spotting.

NamelessAria

I'd also just like to say that if your doctor is truly that unavailable you may want to consider getting another doctor. I mean maybe it's just me but I expect my doctor to be available in a reasonable amount of time if I have something come up and I need to see her. And even if I can't see my doctor I expect to be able to see some doctor or nurse practitioner in the practice in a reasonable amount of time. I get having to wait a couple of months for your yearly check up but for a problem? That doesn't seem right.

Edit because "expect" and "except" are not the same words.

J1D

I don't have anything new to add but I would like to also toss in my recommendation to get a new doc. No point staying with a doc you can't ever actually see. My doc has evening and weekend hours, 4 docs in the practice and 3 NP's and in any given week I can see someone pretty much immediately or within a few days. Not necessarily "my" doc, but someone. And if it's important to you find out the office policy on when they schedule your first prenatal visits with the doc. Some don't do it till 8+ weeks, but my office will get you in with an NP the minute you turn a hpt. 

mangomimosa

Just here to say - get a new doc. You don't need to see your doctor for this yet, but it sounds like you're not on board with your doc philosophically and you can't even get in to see her. If you do get pregnant...this doc sounds like a nightmare to go through a pregnancy with. I bet her c/s rate is like 40%+.

NurseMarie9

I'd get a new doctor if she's that unavailable to you. Also this question belongs in the daily TWW threads. Please read the Newbie Guide and TOU before posting. GL! 

MrsFL2015

You're normal until you're not.  Last month, I was 16 DPO and had no AF.  I took 4 HPT and they all came back negative (started testing 12 DPO). I'm one of those people that doesn't have a set luteal phase but 16 DPO was the longest one I had since charting.   I was hopeful, but then AF showed up.  I know everyone is suppose to have their "typical" luteal phase but it's possible for it to change/vary.  

If you're not getting a BFP, then you're not KU.