Pregnant after a Loss

Pregnant but it doesn't feel real?

My firstborn was still born at 25.5 weeks, and my second attempt ended in a miscarriage at 6 weeks, I'm pregnant for a 3rd time now but I'm basically just expecting it to end the way the last two ended.  I'm still really early in this pregnancy (I'm one of those people who just "know" they're pregnant like a week before their period arrives) but it just doesn't feel real.  I'm realistic enough to understand that I will never get to experience one of those blissful stress free pregnancies they show in the movies but I guess I'd figured that my losses wouldn't kill my excitement?  Does anyone else feel like this?  Like they fully do not expect a baby out of their pregnancy because of their previous losses?  I'm not sad or depressed, I just don't expect to get a baby from this pregnancy.  Is this "normal"?
Pregnancy Ticker

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

Re: Pregnant but it doesn't feel real?

  • I feel the exact same way as you! I am around 5 weeks and I just feel like I'm not normal. Not feeling pregnant or anything 
  • I'm 5 weeks today according to this app.  I'm sorry that you had to experience loss(es) as well but it's reassuring to know I'm not alone.  
    Pregnancy Ticker

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
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  • We are due like the same time! 5w1d here. And yes it's nice having others to talk to!
  • Yeah my EDD is march 29.  
    Pregnancy Ticker

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • I'm totally the same. I made a bunch of appointments with my midwife and MFM for next month and thought to myself "Welp, gonna have to probably call and cancel those in a few weeks." 

    I have moments of embracing it and being excited, but really struggle to think that this will happen. I lost two pregnancies at 6 & 8 weeks, had a son, then lost a baby at almost 22 weeks in April - so I used to just think "Have to see a heartbeat. Have to make it out of the first trimester. Then I'll think it's a baby." Now if I'm lucky enough to stay pregnant (just barely pregnant - found out last Friday), I'm going to be an anxious wreck for months still! :-/ 


    2010: son born 9/1 

    2013: 2 miscarriages + d&cs, both at 10 weeks: April & July

    2014: son #2 born 6/29

    2016: Baby girl stillborn at 21w6d 4/29 and baby boy stillborn at 20w 3d 11/16

  • Linnie29Linnie29 member
    edited July 2016
    Yeah. I keep telling DH things like "well, if this sticks..." or things like that. Super early here, 5w2d, and I don't know if/when it'll be real. I found out with both of my previous MC's during a routine u/s so even the thought of having one done in the next few weeks is terrifying. And I'm seeing a RE, so I know I'll need at least 3 ultrasounds before I graduate. Stress. Nerves. Anxiety. Love and FX for all of us ❤️

    (Edited for spelling)
  • edited July 2016
     I still try to protect myself from heartache and have been very anxious this whole pregnancy. I am currently 32w3d's and some days it feels real. After 5 1st trimester losses, I don't think i will truely feel relief until I am holding my daughter. Good luck to you, and here's to a healthy and happy pregnancy to you all!
  • I feel exactly the same way. We lost twins at 20 1/2 weeks in 2014, and the pain of losing them never goes away. I am currently 5 weeks pregnant, so early, we are so happy, but at the same time, I am terrified of suffering another loss. DH almost doesn't even want to talk about the pregnancy yet, he said he still feels so guarded. I think it's normal to feel the way you feel, but my advice is to take it one day at a time, that's what I am trying to do. Lots of hugs and a healthy pregnancy to you. XOXO
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