Breastfeeding vs formula?

karabearrr

Just wondering what everyone prefers. I have three friends that are new moms. All of them said that they tried breastfeeding for a week, and just couldn't handle it anymore whether it be due to the baby having trouble, or just the amount of time it takes, so they moved on to formula feeding. I still don't know what I want to do yet. 

jenlynne0624

I'm still nursing my almost 2 year old and he's never had a drop of formula. For me, and feeding a baby is pure personal preference, nursing is a million times easier. It's already the proper temperature, it's free, and it's what baby needs because your milk is made for your child. Breast milk is not the same from every mother and will change as your baby gets older. Your baby will automatically root to the breast as soon as its places on your chest because it's the natural thing to do. Plus, it has growth hormones in it and it heals cuts, scrapes, clogged tear ducts, diaper rash, etc. faster than what medication does. Breast fed babies have a lower chance of getting sick, and nothing beats the bond I have with my son because of nursing.

With that said, some aspects of nursing are freaking hard. The first 6 weeks are not easy as your milk is regulating, you're perfecting baby's latch, and you're dealing with sore and bleeding nipples. You'll panic that you're not making enough milk, you probably are, and are worried about people judging you for nursing in public. Clogged ducts and mastitis are also a thing you have to deal with sometimes. Leaky boobs, nursing pads, etc too, but once your milk regulates and you get into a routine, nursing is easy. I still enjoy it and plan on nursing this one too.

However, if I need to supplement or something with formula, then so be it. A fed baby is best.

princesslockness

L couldn't ever latch well enough to nurse, so I pumped from about 2 weeks on. I made it to 4 months before I lost my supply due to having to change schedules because my prep moved from before lunch to after lunch.
It was hard, I had to keep to my schedule exactly and always remembering to take all the little parts everywhere was a pain. But L was happy, and he still is. He is right on his growth curve at 10 months.

He still is a mama's boy when he needs comfort, and Dada is for playing.

BF isn't for everyone. Some can't deal with the physical, some with the emotional/mental of being babies only food source. Some just never have a supply that can support baby.

I recommend at least trying for 2 weeks. Then if it isn't working, find what does.

ashleaf2018

As a FTM, I plan on breastfeeding. As @jenlynne0624 said already, it's free; it doesn't have to be measured out or warmed up; your breastmilk changes due to what baby needs, etc. However, I also know that breastfeeding is hard and some things come up that don't allow you to breastfeed. So that being said, our plan is to breastfeed, but above all our plan is to feed our baby, and we will do that however we have to. 

revelatory7

I had low milk supply for my first pregnancy due to IGT, which many of my doctors did not believe was A Real Thing, so I was unaware that my baby was essentially starving for the first seven days of her life until we switched her to formula. I continued nursing/pumping for about three months (she had about 4 oz of breast milk a day) until I gave up because it was too painful (I literally jerked forward every time I strapped myself into the machine) and I was spending more time hooked up to a medical-grade pump instead of holding my daughter.

For this second baby, I'm more prepared and plan to start pumping sooner and taking additional supplements, but we are going to be ready with formula from day one.

I think the bottom line is that you should do what is most enjoyable for you and choose not to feel guilty about it. When I made the mindful choice that holding my baby with a bottle and formula was better than pumping for 4-6 hours a day, my life became a lot more joyful.

jenlynne0624

I'll add that I didn't pump until I went to work at 7 months, and if I was an exclusive pumper I may have felt differently about it. I was blessed with a good supply and a great nursling so I was lucky. I hope to be so this time around too.

fauxpa-2

I plan on trying to breastfeed, however because of previous surgery I may not be able to.  I'm totally in the "fed baby is best" camp so it's one of those if it works out it works out, if it doesn't I'm not going to kill myself with stress to make it happen.

Sharkey

I'm in the make sure the baby is fed regardless if it's BM or formula. However, I'm also a big supporter of breastfeeding. I nursed until LO was 21m. It's very hard in the beginning but once you get past the pain and adjust to your baby it is SO MUCH EASIER! I think people don't properly prepare for how mentally/emotionally/physically taxing nursing can be in the beginning which is why some people aren't successful. All the pain is temporary and will go away. I can attest to that. 

Toller

Sharkey said:

I'm in the make sure the baby is fed regardless if it's BM or formula. However, I'm also a big supporter of breastfeeding. I nursed until LO was 21m. It's very hard in the beginning but once you get past the pain and adjust to your baby it is SO MUCH EASIER! I think people don't properly prepare for how mentally/emotionally/physically taxing nursing can be in the beginning which is why some people aren't successful. All the pain is temporary and will go away. I can attest to that. 

THIS!!!!! It's SO much harder than it seems (or should be!) and if you don't set yourself up with support from the very beginning, it can be extremely difficult!!! It's something at seems so natural but can be very difficult without knowledge on how to fix problems.

I also think everyone should give it a go- but you should do your best ahead of time to set yourself up for success.

Obviously life happens, so it's not possible for everyone, but definitely worth a shot. (plus it burns mega calories!!!!!!!! which is always nice) 

spruce1978

My first was 6 weeks premature, so she was put on formula while in the NICU. I was pumping, but had a really low supply. I'd pump every two hours around the clock, and it would take 24 hours to fill a small bottle for her. I pumped for 5 weeks then gave up. She was fed through a NG tube for several weeks, and we never successfully breastfed. That being said, I loved having her on formula. My husband could do night feedings while I slept, it was easy to leave her with Grandma for an hour or two, and I found it easy to make bottles on the go. I hope to attempt breastfeeding this time around but will have zero hesitation switching to formula if needed. No guilt. My daughter is nearly 4 - healthy, intelligent, and happy. Do what works for you, mamma!

whitneyp26

I breastfed my first for 10 months, pumped for 9 months with my second, and only made it 5 weeks with my third. No doubt bm is amazing but I expected my third kid to be sickly because I didn't nurse long and she has been the healthiest of all my children. I don't think I'm going to bf at all this time. For me it got harder and harder the more children I had. The last time I felt like the house was falling down around me every time I had to sit and nurse. 

MamaWino

I made a very personal decision to formula feed both of my girls from day 1 and plan to do the same with this baby.  My husband was actually the one to feed each of them their first bottle and formed an incredible bond and wonderful memory with each of them because of it.  I also love that he (and the grandparents) can help with feedings.  I have no idea what the bond of breastfeeding is like, but I can attest to the fact that the bond is just as special when you're feeding your baby a bottle.  Feeding time was always my favorite part of the newborn stage.  Also, my girls are extremely healthy (no colds until my oldest started preschool and was exposed to other kids' germs) and I lost all the baby weight without the extra calorie burn from breastfeeding. 

And before someone assumes it, I'm not trying to make an argument against breastfeeding here.  I just wanted to talk up the positives of formula feeding a bit since it's still so taboo (I got a ton of flack from many different people in my life for it).  Bottom line... do what's best for you and baby.  A happy mama and full baby are the most important things to consider

1982Babies

My first DD wouldn't latch, but I kept trying for every feeding.  After a good 6 weeks or so, I gave up trying daily and just pumped.  She latched okay in the hospital a few times, but was mostly bottle fed BM.  I pumped until about 13 months.  I am hoping this one latches so I don't have to spend so much time attached to the pump.  However, if you end up in my shoes, get a strapless pumping bra and the Pumpin' Pals flanges.  Best things evvaaaa

Edit:  I didn't want to do formula because I am cheap and I had supply, so I just kept pumping.  I did end up having to supplement towards the end due to my supply going down, but then switched to supplementing with cow's milk pretty quickly.

LinziLoo09

I breastfed DD for 15 months, and I really enjoyed the experience. But we were open to supplementing from the beginning. After pregnancy for 9 months, I didn't want to be the sole reason she was continuing to survive. My dad is a pediatrician and both he and our pediatrician were very open and supportive of us just doing whatever we could to keep her alive. And with my dad's connections, we were able to get a great supply of free formula as well. Essentially there's already so much you'll feel guilty with in parenting that I think it's important to let yourself off the hook for things like this. Do what you've got to do to keep the child nourished. Period.

Also as a PSA, I experienced dysphoric milk ejection reflex, which can absolutely play a role in your ongoing commitment to nursing. Basically for your milk to drop, your prolactin levels have to increase, and dopamine inhibits prolactin. So about a minute before your milk drops, your dopamine level will drop so the prolactin can increase. The plummet in dopamine doesn't affect every woman; however, it CAN affect some women's mood. For me, I noticed that before my milk dropped, I thought I was going to have a panic attack...every time. My anxiety would shoot through the roof. I had another friend who experienced this anxiety before the milk drop as well. Another friend said that before her milk would drop, she felt, "like the saddest woman in the world." She didn't have any postpartum depression, but this reflex actually led her to quit breastfeeding after one week. Some women note that they feel ragey/angry at the time. Dopamine just has different impacts emotionally on each individual. There is very little research on this, but out of myself and 6 other friends who gave birth around the same time, three of us noticed this issue. My advice for anyone experiencing this is to pay attention when it's happening and know that it is acute. I got to the point where, when I felt a flash of anxiety, I could tell myself to wait it out because it will end when your milk drops. You can push through it, and eventually it just becomes a warning of when your milk is about to drop.

sourlemon

I couldn't breastfeed my first due to multiple reasons. I no longer feel like I have to list them out, though I did for a good 18 months whenever I was asked. I had extreme guilt over it and started into ppd before getting help. 

With that said, my formula fed 2 year old has never had an ear infection or any other type of illness aside from 2 colds when she was about 7 months old that she picked up visiting my great grandma on her death bed, in a hospital. She's incredibly smart and her teachers (daycare) are constantly surprised she knows things that the other kids in her class (ages 2-4) don't know. DH helped a lot with feedings and DD is a total daddy's girl. It helped DH bond with her from day 1.

 Yes formula costs money and bottles are a pain to wash, but my daughter is no worse off due to formula feeding. I wish the stigma (one way or the other) would stop. I have had near strangers ask me if I was breastfeeding DD or will be with this one. Why is that even a question people should ask others? I find it ridiculous that either choice has to be defended. Feed your kid. Do what you can/what you want/what your baby is able to do. 

This time around I'm going to do whatever is right at the time for my baby and my family. And not feel guilty. So should everyone else here. 

sourlemon

I couldn't breastfeed my first due to multiple reasons. I no longer feel like I have to list them out, though I did for a good 18 months whenever I was asked. I had extreme guilt over it and started into ppd before getting help. 

With that said, my formula fed 2 year old has never had an ear infection or any other type of illness aside from 2 colds when she was about 7 months old that she picked up visiting my great grandma on her death bed, in a hospital. She's incredibly smart and her teachers (daycare) are constantly surprised she knows things that the other kids in her class (ages 2-4) don't know. DH helped a lot with feedings and DD is a total daddy's girl. It helped DH bond with her from day 1.

 Yes formula costs money and bottles are a pain to wash, but my daughter is no worse off due to formula feeding. I wish the stigma (one way or the other) would stop. I have had near strangers ask me if I was breastfeeding DD or will be with this one. Why is that even a question people should ask others? I find it ridiculous that either choice has to be defended. Feed your kid. Do what you can/what you want/what your baby is able to do. 

This time around I'm going to do whatever is right at the time for my baby and my family. And not feel guilty. So should everyone else here. 

LinziLoo09

@sourlemon I hate the stigma and ongoing battle between breast and formula feeding. Before DD was born, I wasn't planning on breastfeeding, but I felt I had to defend that to everyone. And since you can't do a randomized controlled trial ethically on breastfeeding, the research is very biased. There was, however, a study that came out in the last few years where they controlled for confounding factors (like family and environmental factors that affect IQ and health) by comparing children who were formula fed vs children who were breastfed within the same family. So one child received exclusive breastfeeding and another was formula fed. Since they came from the same families, these environmental factors were much better controlled for. What they found longitudinally (I believe after 11 and 14 years) was that there was no statistical difference in IQ or health between the groups. So do what you've got to do to keep your child fed. That kid will be totally fine and no different in the long run.

DiFazette

I'm going to try like all hell to nurse these babies.  I exclusively pumped (using that term loosely because he had extra calories from birth and in NICU for about 3 months).  I want to nurse these babies.  That's what I think will be best for our family.  To each their own.  I get sad when I hear people who really wanted to nurse quit at a week- that's the hardest point when that milk comes in and baby can't get a handle on the flow/nipple/whatever.  I'm part of some BFing groups to try to set myself up to be successful this time (assuming I don't have 2 preemies or two medically compromised babies) and they've all said the first two weeks are really hard.  Once you get past that, it all falls into place.  We switched DS to formula at 8 months since my supply couldn't stay ahead when he went to daycare/j went back to work.  I could only pump 1-2 feeds ahead so we had to start supplementing and I dried up quickly.  

beff12

I breastfed DD until she was 13 months or so and she was supplemented with formula at least once a day the whole time. I made it a few weeks exclusively nursing and wanted to gouge my eyes out. Rather than giving up, we settled on DH giving DD a bottle of formula every night. I also sent formula/bottles with her if she stayed with a babysitter. 

Setting small goals helped me tremendously. Thinking "I have to breastfeed for a year" wasn't encouraging to me, so I pretty much went month by month and had a "yay me" party every time I made it to the next month. 

Breastmilk is great for the reasons others listed and formula is also great! I was a solely formula-fed baby and I like to think that I turned out pretty awesome  But really, you'll find what's best for you. Whether it's BFing or FFing, as long as your LO has a full belly, you're doing it right! 

JEM525

My pediatrician recommended breast feeding for the first year, so that's what we did. My DS weend on his own, and it came very natural to us. That saying it's not for everyone and I'm a strong believer on what is healthy for my family may not be healthy for your family. I do think you should try and if it's not for your family then you should be alright with moving to formula, just watch for the recalls. The big companies tend to take turns recalling different formulas. 

Let me EDIT I mentioned BFing was very natural for me and DS, but I forgot to mention he had low blood sugar so they gave him formula along with breast feeding in the hospital. We stopped formula once I got home ( because my milk came in full force). The goal is to feed your baby so they are healthy! How ever way works for you

DiFazette

LinziLoo09 said:

@sourlemon I hate the stigma and ongoing battle between breast and formula feeding. Before DD was born, I wasn't planning on breastfeeding, but I felt I had to defend that to everyone. And since you can't do a randomized controlled trial ethically on breastfeeding, the research is very biased. There was, however, a study that came out in the last few years where they controlled for confounding factors (like family and environmental factors that affect IQ and health) by comparing children who were formula fed vs children who were breastfed within the same family. So one child received exclusive breastfeeding and another was formula fed. Since they came from the same families, these environmental factors were much better controlled for. What they found longitudinally (I believe after 11 and 14 years) was that there was no statistical difference in IQ or health between the groups. So do what you've got to do to keep your child fed. That kid will be totally fine and no different in the long run.

I'm not ragging on you @LinziLoo09 in any way, but these studies annoy the shit out of me.  This is making an incredibly incorrect assumption that every member of a family with shared DNA has the same IQ.  I have 2 big brothers.  One is Mensa material, the other is your average joe.  They're both lovely, but they are different people - similar DNA, same environmental factors, etc.  It doesn't really matter, but that's like saying babies born vaginally are smarter than those via cesarian.  One must take into account the IQ and commitment to education of the parents and surrounding family to make that judgement.  

brittnic86

I got really frustrated with my mom today, because when I was asked if I was planning on breastfeeding, I said I was going to try my best...but with twins...and having to go back to work after 6 weeks...I didn't know how well it would work. I'm also a FTM. My mom chimed in with oh trust me you'll have plenty of milk, and breastfeeding is so much better for them. Um, okay, thanks, I knew that. But I'm also trying to not work myself up with a lot of expectations about pregnancy, labor, breastfeeding, parenting....I've read so many things from mothers who planned on this all natural at home water birth, for example, and ended up having to have an emergency C-Section, and feel like a failure because of it. That's the last thing I want, to feel like I failed somehow. So I'll just do my best, and see what happens.

OliveP27

If you want to nurse, it's super helpful to set up a support system in advance. Find your local La Leche League, go to meetings, educate yourself, find your local IBCLC or better yet pick a hospital with one or more on staff. (lactation consultant =/= IBCLC) 
with all of that support and education you'll have a far higher chance at success and overcoming or avoiding obstacles. You don't have to pick today, but it would be to your advantage to start educating yourself if you are considering breastfeeding. The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding is a good place to start. 

LinziLoo09

DiFazette said:

I'm not ragging on you @LinziLoo09 in any way, but these studies annoy the shit out of me.  This is making an incredibly incorrect assumption that every member of a family with shared DNA has the same IQ.  I have 2 big brothers.  One is Mensa material, the other is your average joe.  They're both lovely, but they are different people - similar DNA, same environmental factors, etc.  It doesn't really matter, but that's like saying babies born vaginally are smarter than those via cesarian.  One must take into account the IQ and commitment to education of the parents and surrounding family to make that judgement.  

I completely agree that using siblings to help control for environmental and DNA factors is an imperfect practice. Individual differences within families can be outstanding for sure! However, since we can't do randomized controlled trials with breastfeeding/formula, we are left with these imperfect methods. I like this study in that it at least attempts to address some of these factors rather than (as with nearly every previous study) automatically assuming that breastfed children (whose parents are statistically more likely to be of a higher educational level and SES, have lower rates of smoking and obesity, and practice better nutrition overall) have better health and intelligence outcomes solely due to breastfeeding as opposed to any of these other factors that can certainly have a great effect. 

The study I was discussing used several measures to examine academic achievement: Peabody Picture Vocabulary Test, Peabody Individual Achievement Test - Reading Recognition, and Peabody Individual Achievement Test – Math Ability, Wechsler Intelligence Scale (WISC), and scholastic competence. While there certainly were still differences between many pairs of siblings (there certainly are within my own family), the data did not show a statistical trend supporting greater intelligence based on either feeding category. You can read the full study here for more information: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4077166/ 

cjt121413

I BFed with DS and want to do with the same with this LO. I had a breast reduction when I was 18, so I was really scared I wouldn't be able to BF, but I was, and after the initial struggle it was great. If anyone has questions about BFing after breast surgery I'm happy to help if I can.

zubenescamali

the benefits of nursing far outweigh those of formula feeding. but nursing doesn't come easy for everyone, and it is definitely harder than formula in the first few weeks. but over time, studies have shown that most mothers rank BF as easier than FF once they get it established.  this typically takes more than a week.
this is for direct BF though, pumping is a whole different story.
DD1 got a couple bottles of formula in the early days. it smelled bad and gave her reflux.
DD2 never tasted formula.
if you are willing to try BF, there really is nothing to lose. but give it a decent try, around a month, and get yourself prepared for some possible early struggles. a myriad of issues can arise during BF a newborn but many of them can be fixed with a little effort.

doodleoodle

When DD was born it could take up to an hour to get her to latch and once she did it was toe curlingly painful the entire time. At her one week well check it was discovered that she had a tongue tie. The doctor clipped it right there and she latched right away. It was still incredibly painful, but I had read that for the first few weeks it can be. A few weeks later it was still awful. I dreaded every feeding and had to pump myself up before letting her latch. My nipples had huge fissures so it looked like chunks of my nipples were missing. My OB actually winced when she saw them at my 6 week follow up. I made it to 2 months and I was so close to giving up, but I found a dentist willing to see if baby had a lip tie. She did, we got that revised. Unfortunately, it was too late. After that she couldn't figure out how to work her lips. She struggled. It again began taking an hour to get her to latch, not because she couldn't but because she wouldn't. She went on a nursing strike. My supply plummeted. We did a weighted feed and in a 45 minute nursing session she got less than 2 ounces. Her growth slowed. She hated nursing so I began pumping and supplementing with formula. I did this for a little over a month before I switched over exclusively to formula. It's been super easy ever since. Breastfeeding, for me, was a nightmare. Will I try to breastfeed this little one? Absolutely. It's such a beautiful, loving thing. It's also really nice to not have to go downstairs to the kitchen and make a bottle in the middle of the night. I was devastated when breastfeeding didn't work out with DD, but you know what? She's now 7 months old and is happy and healthy, in 5 more months it literally will not matter at all whether or not she was breastfed. 

Do whatever is best for you and LO. Don't let anyone shame you into making one choice over the other. Even though breastfeeding was such a personal thing for me and I struggled so hard to try to make it work, that breast is best crap makes me ragey. I'm so sick of the mommy shaming. I've totally been judged by strangers who know absolutely nothing about me or DD for bottle feeding. I'm just waiting for it to happen again so I can say something smart and make them feel like an idiot. 

slartybartfast

Pros and cons to both. For me the pros of breastfeeding to age 1 make that my preference. I guess I would just suggest planning on breastfeeding so that you can make that decision based on your experience with the cards you are dealt. Read any post on this and its clear that there are soooo many variables associated with breastfeeding that affect an individuals choice on the matter.

sreysaw17

Here's a question from a FTM. First of all, I have to say I appreciate the honest and respectful conversation on this topic! So helpful for me to hear both sides and to hear it discussed without that awful stigma attached. I loved the "fed is best" bend I'm hearing now.

So, onto my question. I fully intend to try to BF with the knowledge that things don't always turn out the way you want them to. I will be staying home once the baby is born so there isn't an issue with feeding times during the day but I would like to be able to pump some as well so that my H can take his turns in the night or take an evening feeding session. How does that fit in with a typical BFing schedule? Am I going to have to be pumping in the middle of the night while he's feeding the baby or, assuming good supply, would I be trying to accumulate enough extra milk during the day so that I could *sleep* through those feedings? Just a bit of FTM ignorance that hopefully some of you can help me out with...

slartybartfast

I was never able to sleep through night feedings. It was just as easy to pull the baby in bed with me, feed, and then put him back in his bed (next to my bed). It really wasn't a big interruption for me.

doodleoodle

slartybartfast said:

I was never able to sleep through night feedings. It was just as easy to pull the baby in bed with me, feed, and then put him back in his bed (next to my bed). It really wasn't a big interruption for me.

Truth. I have friends who could sleep through it.

zubenescamali

Srey Saw said:

Here's a question from a FTM. First of all, I have to say I appreciate the honest and respectful conversation on this topic! So helpful for me to hear both sides and to hear it discussed without that awful stigma attached. I loved the "fed is best" bend I'm hearing now.

So, onto my question. I fully intend to try to BF with the knowledge that things don't always turn out the way you want them to. I will be staying home once the baby is born so there isn't an issue with feeding times during the day but I would like to be able to pump some as well so that my H can take his turns in the night or take an evening feeding session. How does that fit in with a typical BFing schedule? Am I going to have to be pumping in the middle of the night while he's feeding the baby or, assuming good supply, would I be trying to accumulate enough extra milk during the day so that I could *sleep* through those feedings? Just a bit of FTM ignorance that hopefully some of you can help me out with...

Your biggest milk production occurs in the wee morning hours. So many moms will nurse off one side only in the morning and pump the other side to save. (If you're really good you can pump and nurse at the same time- caution, spillage is likely!) I don't recommend picking up the pump at all for the first month unless there is a really good reason. Your supply will take time to regulate and adjust with LOs needs, and oversupply can cause just as many problems as undersupply.  feeding on demand typically adjusts your supply for you

fauxpa-2

cjt121413 said:

I BFed with DS and want to do with the same with this LO. I had a breast reduction when I was 18, so I was really scared I wouldn't be able to BF, but I was, and after the initial struggle it was great. If anyone has questions about BFing after breast surgery I'm happy to help if I can.

I would love to hear more about your experience! I also had breast reduction surgery and my OB/nurses keep asking if I had "duct salvaging" which I have no idea... my original surgeon just told me that I might not be able to breastfeed.  Did you have surgery specific struggles or do you think it was just the "usual" breastfeeding hurdles?  Feel free to PM me if you don't want to answer these publicly. 

Christinaruth74

Feed all the babies! 
But seriously.. You will do what's best for you and your family. I never wanted to BF until I got pregnant with DD. It was really important to H and became important to me. My birthing/hospital experience ended up not being at all as I had envisioned. There was lots of trauma and exhaustion and medication on top of my baby who was dropping weight and growing increasingly jaundice. I tried for a while to keep the breast milk torch burning by pumping and supplementing and trying to perfect her latch.. It all became too much for me and it was even affecting my marriage. I put a lot of mommy guilt on myself for choosing to formula feed exclusively around 3 months, but looking back I have no regrets. None. 
This time I will not put crazy expectations on myself, but I will also probably try harder to BF now that I know what to anticipate. But, if we have to switch to formula, that will be ok too

SmashJam

I echo what others say about the first two weeks being the hardest...I quit when the ped made me give ds a bottle after he lost weight at his 2 week. I was so anxious that I wasn't feeding him I just quit immediately. I often wonder if I had stuck with it we would have hit our stride and been fine! I hope to try again with this one. 

That being said, DS is happy and healthy and wonderful and formula has worked out great for us so if I have to go that route I'm fine with it!

erniebernie1

I breastfed my first for 11 months until he weaned because my supply got so low. I started pumping when I went back to work at 3 months. Pumping at work was incredibly stressful, I barely made enough to get to the next day, and had to pump after Lo went to bed every night. Not being able to share night feedings was also a lot. That being said since I'll have 2 under 2 this time I am stressed about finding time to pump when I go back to work. I plan on breastfeeding until my leave is over, and then just doing the best I can

jennbaylor12

Some really great advise and examples have been given in this thread!! I'm def of the mindset that fed is best. I breastfed DS (now 2yo) exclusively (meaning on the breast and pumped breast milk) until just past 3mths, then slowly began to incorporate formula and was done nursing/pumping entirely before he was 6mths old. Breastfeeding was incredibly important to me - DH has truly terrible, debiliating at times, asthma and allergies. I'd done a lot of research and knew that exlusively breastfeeding is considered to be incredibly beneficial to reducing the potential of a child developing asthma, especially if a parent has it. I set small goals for myself - the first week, the first month, to 6wks, with the major goal being exclusively on breastmilk until 3mths old minimum. I'm proud that I made it - it wasn't always easy but it certainly wasn't terrible for me. I'm fortunate in that DS latched immediately in the hospital and continued to do so for the duration. In hindsight, I'm not 100% sure he had the best latch - there were times my nipples were completely raw, cracked and bleeding and I had to seriously mentally prepare myself with deep breathing before letting him latch bc it was so painful. I'll also say that those experiences were extremely short lived although they felt like forever at the time. I also think I waited too late to start pumping before returning to work. I went back to work when DS was 10wks old and didn't even break the pump out of the box until he was 8wks old. I wish I had started when he was 4-6wks old, after my supply was estabilished but had given myself more time to build up a stash as well as to get used to pumping. If I had, I think I would have been able to have had him exclusively on breastmilk for longer. But, he was 9.5lbs when born and was a hungry baby!! Lol. Regardless, I'm glad I breastfed for as long as I did and, although I was very sad at the time, I'm now very glad I incorporated formula when I did - it was best for both of us! I'll give breastfeeding a go this time around too, hopefully I'll be kinder to myself  

princesslockness

zubenescamali said:

Srey Saw said:

Here's a question from a FTM. First of all, I have to say I appreciate the honest and respectful conversation on this topic! So helpful for me to hear both sides and to hear it discussed without that awful stigma attached. I loved the "fed is best" bend I'm hearing now.

So, onto my question. I fully intend to try to BF with the knowledge that things don't always turn out the way you want them to. I will be staying home once the baby is born so there isn't an issue with feeding times during the day but I would like to be able to pump some as well so that my H can take his turns in the night or take an evening feeding session. How does that fit in with a typical BFing schedule? Am I going to have to be pumping in the middle of the night while he's feeding the baby or, assuming good supply, would I be trying to accumulate enough extra milk during the day so that I could *sleep* through those feedings? Just a bit of FTM ignorance that hopefully some of you can help me out with...

Your biggest milk production occurs in the wee morning hours. So many moms will nurse off one side only in the morning and pump the other side to save. (If you're really good you can pump and nurse at the same time- caution, spillage is likely!) I don't recommend picking up the pump at all for the first month unless there is a really good reason. Your supply will take time to regulate and adjust with LOs needs, and oversupply can cause just as many problems as undersupply.  feeding on demand typically adjusts your supply for you

There are many details that can change your plans to BF. L sttn at about 3 days old. I started pumping at about 3:30am every morning to get an extra bottle for the day/build a stash up. Since I had to go back to work at 10days pp I just pumped after every time he had a bottle, and did 1 extra session at 3 am. So how long you get to stay home, how often LO eats, when they start sttn all can change your feeding and pumping pattern.

SarahF8611

So, onto my question. I fully intend to try to BF with the knowledge that things don't always turn out the way you want them to. I will be staying home once the baby is born so there isn't an issue with feeding times during the day but I would like to be able to pump some as well so that my H can take his turns in the night or take an evening feeding session. How does that fit in with a typical BFing schedule? Am I going to have to be pumping in the middle of the night while he's feeding the baby or, assuming good supply, would I be trying to accumulate enough extra milk during the day so that I could *sleep* through those feedings? Just a bit of FTM ignorance that hopefully some of you can help me out with...

You can absolutely pump to have some BM stored up for outings and overnight trips although I wouldn't reccomend sleeping through feelings. You will wake up really really uncomfortable and it could mess with your supply. I would reccomend pumping after baby feeds during around week 6 to have some reserve. When baby starts sleeping through the night you can also pimp before you go to bed. 

Sharkey

I think it's important to note that BF babies tend to lose weight soon after birth and before you even discharge from the hospital. That is completely normal as it takes a few days for your milk to come in. They'll be eating colostrum which is wonderful for their little bodies. Don't feel like you're starving your baby or doing them a disservice! It's normal, you're not a bad mom. 

sourlemon

Sharkey said:

I think it's important to note that BF babies tend to lose weight soon after birth and before you even discharge from the hospital. That is completely normal as it takes a few days for your milk to come in. They'll be eating colostrum which is wonderful for their little bodies. Don't feel like you're starving your baby or doing them a disservice! It's normal, you're not a bad mom. 

Don't ALL (or most) babies lose weight after birth? My pedi said it's expected which is why they check it at their 1 week visit to ensure they get back to birth weight. 

My baby took 2.5 weeks to get back to birth weight and she was formula fed. That caused concern but she was gaining so I had more time before interventions.