Strange Reactions to Pregnancy Announcement

stumptownmama

I thought it might be fun to share some of the odd reactions we receive when we share the news.

We have only told our parents and siblings so far, but I'm so let down with my in-laws lack of enthusiasm. Man, they are the most non-reactionary people ever. They hardly get excited about anything. We told them last night by having our daughter wear a big sister t-shirt. She entered the room, they saw the shirt and made no expression. We asked if they read her shirt and said "yeah, so do you know if it's a boy or girl?" So underwhelming. No smiles, excitement, hugging, NADA. I guess I should be getting more used to it after 6 years of marriage but I just can't. 

Anyone else have a weird reaction?

mommywesley

We told today and no weird reactions but a couple funny ones. MIL said "oh no! Again?" Ha! This is #5. Grandmothers in-law wouldn't believe us lol she just kept saying "no you're not!" We'd say you're gonna be a great grandma again in January and she'd ask "by who?" Lol I think she'll finally believe us when she sees my growing tummy lolololol 

myriamc96

My hubby's sister in law, (she's hated me since day one) said to my hubby, when he told her at 20 weeks that I saw pregnant with my first son "are you SURE she's pregnant? She doesn't look like it!" And she looked down her nose at me. And then she was pissed that she wasn't invited to our baby shower, lol I thought you said I wasn't even pregnant 

scgirl6113

Last time we out our oldest son in a big bro tshirt when we went to have dinner with my inlaws. They never said anything and finally my DH asked if they say LOs shirt and they said yes. And my DH was like "well..." And they said we'll surely you would have called us to tell us that kind of news. We were just kinda like "um well we thought this was a fun way to tell you..." Very anticlimactic and super awkward...

stumptownmama

@scgirl6113 that's irritating!! 

ChaoticWolf

Oh no! After hearing all these stories I'm sorta dreading telling my in laws.

Vivi20

That's so sad how some of your in-laws are reacting. I honestly don't know how my MIL reacted because my dh told her. But he said she's excited, and I've talked to her since, and she does indeed  seem excited about it. When I told my dad he seemed less than thrilled; just very, "oh, you're pregnant? Was it planned?"

hjmorgan-2

My dad is the realist in the family. This will be their first grandchild, when DH and I told my parents my Dads first reaction was almost depressed, and all he talked about afterwards was how we're going to move and get a house now, etc. Then he went on to talk about other non-related subjects. After a few days he got excited,  but it takes awhile for him to accept his "little girl " is growing up. So it was a bit depressing he wasn't excited right away. took him nearly 6 months to be ok with me being married and moved out! (even though he LOVES DH)

christac1010

Both our parents were ecstatic (my husband is the only boy and I'm an only child), but telling them was so weird. First we gave my mom a frame on Mothers Day with a quote about grandmothers. She kept looking at the stock picture and finally asked who the people were in the picture. DH told her to read the quote because I was crying. Then she caught on. For his mother, we sent her a picture of us holding the pregnancy test, a pregnancy book, and my shirt said "napping for two." After 15 minutes, she called to say she couldn't read the test and was confused. Like I said everyone was happy, but it made for weird, funny stories. 

stumptownmama

When I told my grandma about my last pregnancy. She said "I thought you were a little thicker when I gave you a hug."  I was 8 weeks and didn't gain a pound until 16 weeks. Thank grandma!  This is the same grandma that said to me when she visited the hospital after I gave birth "when I walked out of the hospital with all 5 of my babies, I looked like I was never pregnant. You'll have some work to do."  Gotta love grandmas with no filter. 

zdmd_14

@underthesea  haha! My grandmother told me that she had told my grandfather that she thought I might be because I was a little plumper the last time she saw me.  Um...the last time you saw me I wasn't pregnant.  And I don't think I was plump either.   Thanks but no thanks.

ETA--TB ate the rest of my post.  
Most of our family was excited, though me insisting that my dad/stepmom FaceTime with us made them worry that I was going to tell them something bad. 
When we called my other step mom though, she said "oh! ....well that's surprising" and "well that wasn't expected".  Her husband kept repeating "well that's great news!!" like he was trying to compensate for her awkwardness.  She's excited now but she's implied that she doesn't believe that it was planned. Can't win them all I guess. Lol

KarliQ88

underthesea said:

When I told my grandma about my last pregnancy. She said "I thought you were a little thicker when I gave you a hug."  I was 8 weeks and didn't gain a pound until 16 weeks. Thank grandma!  This is the same grandma that said to me when she visited the hospital after I gave birth "when I walked out of the hospital with all 5 of my babies, I looked like I was never pregnant. You'll have some work to do."  Gotta love grandmas with no filter. 

I love this lady!!! So funny. 

ashanne88

We face timed DH's parents on Saturday to tell them.  We put DS in a big brother shirt, but they didn't notice at all.  DH had to ask if they saw his shirt multiple times.  FIL even read "big brother" out loud and didn't comprehend.  LOL they finally got it after about 5 min.  We called them back last night when my SIL was there and she noticed within 30 seconds.  It was pretty hilarious.

aishmc

@underthesea your Grandma sounds like mine! I'm most worried to tell her honestly! She's asked me 4 times in the last few weeks if I'm pregnant since I look plumper (I've actually lost 5 lbs due to morning sickness) and my skin looks horrible. She said it in front of 8 other people at the dinner table. Never a dull moment!

TinaBelcher

My dad was so excited. He's older (67) and these will be his first grandkids. They knew about our IVF cycle and my stepmom asked me how it turned out while I was talking to her getting ready in the gym locker room! I couldn't tell her like that so I went straight to their house to tell them. Dad's all excited and I'm like "it's really early we're not telling anyone else yet, nothing online ok?" (This was like, 4 weeks, before beta even) 

I go to leave, they walked me to my car and I'm chatting with my stepmom, dad wanders to the neighbor outside next door. Getting in my car I shout out my final goodbye and the neighbor's all "congratulations!!! How exiting can't wait for a little one blah blah!!" 

DAD! You couldn't keep a secret for literally 15 minutes?!  goofy man

therealfrizzle

Both of our brothers were extremely underwhelmed. We made each a onesie that said something about Uncle (in my profile pic). My brother said, "Is that why you invited me over?" and his brother just looked at it for a few minutes and we were like...???? Then he said he had figured it out earlier in the week when we were trying very hard for him to meet us with his parents. Turns out, he's been super depressed over it 'cos he's the older brother and isn't married with no prospects. One of my other friends ended up doing weird stuff trying to get attention whenever someone asked me about my pregnancy. And a co-worker who miscarried sometime earlier this year or last year, (I don't know 'cos she never told me about it, which is fine, not my business) is super upset I'm pregnant and won't even acknowledge me in the hallway. Always thought pregnancy brought joy, never thought it'd bring so much drama too.

sgolden02

We haven't told many yet. I'm only almost 8 weeks. Waiting for father's day. 2 out of the 3 people that know asked "Did you mean to?". Isn't there like a rule you shouldn't ask that???

ladysaceb

My family has never really showed emotion and when we announced with number 4 they didn't really believe us at first. I am expecting a similar reaction this time and maybe even a few negative comments because we had made it pretty clear we weren't having any more kids.  Surprise!  My ILs will be over the moon excited, although I am a little nervous to tell SIL as she had 3 miscarriages last year.

curlysue22

My ILs don't show much emotion, they are very reserved.  And my MIL is a very negative person.  So when we told them this weekend (DD was wearing a Big Sister shirt and DH was wearing a "I (heart) my Pregnant Wife" shirt"), my FIL gave me a hug.  My MIL however, though smiling, said:
1. Ugh in January? You better hope there's not a snowstorm.
2. (To DD) - You won't be the center of attention anymore.
3. (To DD) - You'll have to share all your toys.
4. (To Me) - In the middle of the school year ?! (I work at a high school)

Come on, couldn't a "congratulations" or "we are happy for you" slipped in there?  Such a negative nancy.

@sgolden02 , I agree.  Someone asked me all earnestly with my DD "Is this a good thing"?

sjanish

mommywesley said:

We told today and no weird reactions but a couple funny ones. MIL said "oh no! Again?" Ha! This is #5. Grandmothers in-law wouldn't believe us lol she just kept saying "no you're not!" We'd say you're gonna be a great grandma again in January and she'd ask "by who?" Lol I think she'll finally believe us when she sees my growing tummy lolololol 

Hahha yes! This is #4 and we get a lot of are you done NOW?  Like 4 isn't that many people. It isn't 27! 

wpowell

We haven't told our families yet. I've told a few people at work who have been very happy for us (even one who miscarried last year has been so sweet about it all). I also told my parents neighbors who are like second parents to me. They were very excited for us as well. 
I don't really know why but I am dreading telling our families a little bit. This Baby is due 1 day before our DD's 7th birthday. My family has been on us for a while about having more kids but we weren't really sure we wanted more kids until earlier this year. My DD will be so excited and I think our families will too but I am just dreading telling everyone... 

TexasGal24

PMForbie said:

Both of our brothers were extremely underwhelmed. We made each a onesie that said something about Uncle (in my profile pic). My brother said, "Is that why you invited me over?" and his brother just looked at it for a few minutes and we were like...???? Then he said he had figured it out earlier in the week when we were trying very hard for him to meet us with his parents. Turns out, he's been super depressed over it 'cos he's the older brother and isn't married with no prospects. One of my other friends ended up doing weird stuff trying to get attention whenever someone asked me about my pregnancy. And a co-worker who miscarried sometime earlier this year or last year, (I don't know 'cos she never told me about it, which is fine, not my business) is super upset I'm pregnant and won't even acknowledge me in the hallway. Always thought pregnancy brought joy, never thought it'd bring so much drama too.

Don't let those negative people take your joy away (easier said than done). None of their reactions have anything to do with you or your baby and EVERYTHING to do with their lives/choices/circumstances. 

Ali Grindell

Yes!! My dreaded MIL. When we told her on Mother's day that she was going to be a grandmother in her card (this will be her 1st grandkid), her first question was "So, what birth control failed?" We just looked at her in confusion and shock. She has since tried to make up for it by over trying with excitement but it just makes it worse. Also, she already gave my husband a "happy father's day" card and signed it from her and "baby G" as that's what we all our baby for right now until we know the sex. I found it odd/rude that she signed it from our baby or is that just me overreacting because I don't like her? 

colleenkevin

@Ali Grindell  I would be annoyed if my MIL signed a card from herself and my unborn baby.  Maybe we are both overreacting, but I feel like that's your place to give him a card from the baby if you want to.  

LCartee2016

@Ali Grindell I would be on a war path if my MIL did that. It's just rude and my ragey baby can't handle rudeness right now.  

stumptownmama

@curlylocks3  sounds like our MIL could be friends. Those are terrible reactions. It's gotten easier for me to brush them off but still really effects me. 

EH112212

@underthesea  both times I told my dad, he told me he told I looked a little bigger. I was about 8 weeks both times and had not yet gained any weight. Thanks Dad :-)

stumptownmama

EH112212 said:

@underthesea  both times I told my dad, he told me he told I looked a little bigger. I was about 8 weeks both times and had not yet gained any weight. Thanks Dad :-)

Not cool dad!

Ali Grindell

@colleenkevin  @LCartee2016 I knew I wasn't crazy! She's very manipulative like that and if I called her out on it, she would play dumb. Lately I've just been steering clear of her because she causes me the most stress and she's not worth it! Thanks for not making me feel like i'm crazy!  

katesmama0706

@Ali Grindell oh man. My MIL pulls that crap too and it makes me SO. MAD. but every time that I've called her out she's all denial and "oh you just misunderstood me" oh no I didn't, you're just a brat. Avoidance is the name of the game!
We're announcing next week and I'm so nervous because last pregnancy we did it in person at Christmas and got blank stares but when my SIL announced 3 days later via text people lost their minds they were so excited (our first and her second- she also made a point to find out the sex of her baby the day before I found out ours and did the same thing with the same responses when they were both girls) . I'm going text route then shutting off my phone and letting DH deal with it this time cause I can't deal with their crap. 

gonetothesea

I am also in the "no filter" grandma camp.  DH and I told his grandma the news last week, and she said "I thought you looked a little bigger at Christmas." Ummm, definitely wasn't pregnant then, but thanks.

katesmama0706

@gonetothesea omgggg I would have snapped right then and there! 

JennaLee1486

I've had multiple comments along the lines of "you know how that happens right?" My kids will be 18 months apart. Yes, I know how it happens. We planned this. I'm a grown married woman. Jerks.

katesmama0706

@JennaLee1486 haha someone said that to me over the weekend (18 month gap for us too) and I deadpanned "no! Its the darndest thing!" That shut them up. I once said it to a man at the zoo when I was nannying 4 kids too. I don't know what it is that makes people question other's knowledge on reproduction 

Ali Grindell

@Katesmama Ugh.. i feel your pain! I'll never understand why people, esp family, has to be so ugly about a joyous blessing. You do what you have to, to stay stress-free and happy because no one is worth adding more to what you're already going through! 

sarahmsoda

Part of me wonders if MIL's just feel like they have a lack of control and say over their son's partners pregnancies. My MIL has all boys so she will never get to see her child carry a grandchild or witness a birth (unless one of her DIL's let her which is unlikely)... so sometimes I understand her lack of tact because she is just coping with it in her own way. Other days I am less understanding and just want to call her out. I know that when it comes to parenting we will have a whole new level of battles... so I better learn to let it roll off me now. 

I am thankful for my very chill father, I know he will be nothing but supportive the whole way. 

Shannibear

My mother-in-law sobbed for an hour and a half and kept asking my (now) husband (then boyfriend) if this is what he really wanted and telling him he didn't have to go through with it. She also begged him not to marry me. It was pretty disappointing. We have a better relationship now, thank God.

Shannibear

And with our second pregnancy (after we were married) his grandma just said, "oh no!"

azwildcat62

My step mom (who I'm not close with) said, Congrats! About time! Your egg & his sperm have known each other for a long time so they were obviously excited to officially meet.  ummm... thanks? lol

Michellewfhs

I sent MIL a cute scratch off type lottery ticket that revealed we are expecting since she's 16 hours away. I also sent her a card explaining it I'm case she didn't connect the dots and asked her to keep our news to herself until we're ready to share. Her response was a "how sure are you?" text. Since then she has taken it upon herself to threaten us that she will tell everyone our news when she doesn't get her way. My husband's brother got married over the weekend so we made the trip out there and she was awful the whole time. She has alcohol abuse issues, but there's no excuse for acting like that. Everyone else we've told has been beyond excited for us.

mrskimm09

Yes, my parents were less then thrilled. They said because they are nervous but have been asking us when we were going to try again. I don't get it. Don't let it bum you out too much. There is a miracle in progress.