September 2016 Moms

UO Thursday

2

Re: UO Thursday

  • I agree with @runningisrad I hate how stereotyped baby clothes are by gender - shirts with words are generally not my style at all, but "mommy's little ___" etc. I really don't care for.

    I remember very clearly going from labor and delivery to the maternity ward after being team green and having a girl. And there  were two onesies on the wall ( which were of course available for purchase in the gift shop of the hospital) and the boys one was blue and said "Future President" and the girls one was pink and said "Princess"

    And my first thought was "Well that's some bullshit." This girl just tore her way through MY plebeian vagina. Unless her greatest achievement is going to be to marry royalty, she's never going to be a princess. I don't see any reason why both of those onesies could not have said "Future President." I admit that's not likely achievement either, but at least seems to be something worth aspiring to.

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  • Insert eight billion angry eyes rolls 
    Married 6/4/11
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  • I'm going to take this UO one step further and say that I can't stand princess culture. The whole disney fairytale princess pink-pink-pink stuff leaves a horrible taste in my mouth and I don't want to perpetuate it. When you look at these characters nearly all of them strive to marry rich and have no relevant ambition beyond that. Can't one of these women get a damn job? 
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  • @Thscary when I lived in CA, we went to a comedy club and Tosh was a surprise guest. Everyone was excited, except me- I find him painfully not funny. I took that time to go use the bathroom and I didn't have to wait!

    I can't think of an original UO at the moment.

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  • MojieJoMojieJo member
    @runningisrad 100% agreed.  I not only hate the stupid gender-based phrases on clothes but some of them downright weird me out.  
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  • Oh well! Our nursery theme will be "princess-y" and we love it! Pink everywhere and ruffles galore. We're even getting her a princess hooded towel with a crown.

    I'm particular about her clothes but will do the girly thing. I'll let my kids be kids and play with whatever they want but I'll go all pink and blue while they're tiny. Gender stereotypes really don't bother me at all. 
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  • SLou24SLou24 member
    @Cricket Bug Oh my god, that image makes me want to cry! So sweet. I love it, I wish you had gotten pictures!! 

    As for gender stereotyped clothing -- some of it doesn't bother me, some of it does. The one thing that really bothers me is when I go into a store and everything is very strongly either/or for girls/boys -- there are some stores that just don't seem to understand gender neutral clothing or even clothing with gender "hints" but no overwhelming message. 

    I think the worst one I've seen was a picture of two onesies, and the boy one said something like "stud" and the girl one said "I hate my thighs". NO NO NO NO NO. 
  • @lovelylauren86 @AlwaysAuntNeverMom My first daughter's room is pink galore. It's my favorite color, so why would I not use it? We are going yellow and grey with this baby girl, but I'm adding sparkly touches. If at any point either girls express that they hate pink/sparkles/ruffles, I'll stop putting them in it. But, as their mother, I get to dress them in the things I like. Just as we have dozens (seriously dozens) of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle onsies and shirts for them because that is a favorite of my husband.

    @cricket bug I wish I could have seen your daughter in her tutu with her drill. That sounds adorable! 

    @SLou24 The clothing you mention or the Superman logo pic example from above do bother me. I'm not putting my girls in anything with negative connotations (such as she should hate her body or be striving to find a man).






  • I grew up loving Disney princesses. Went on to get my doctorate and married for love, not money or fame or royalty aspirations, and am the bread winner of the family. I think it's fun for little kids to fantasize and watch movies and never think further into it than that.

    @lovelylauren86 - I've got some competition for you... my son is also often rocking "Future #1 Draft Pick" or "All-Star" clothing!
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  • @KimmySchmidt @PSUBecky23 that's what the root of it is - the difference between the boys stuff and girls stuff is RIDICULOUS. Baby girls only get superficial "sweet and pretty, Princess" shit and boys get the cool superhero, or ambitious stuff? Or get labeled as a "stud" or "ladies man"? Really? I hate it. I do not mind more vague stuff like "little man" or "I love auntie" or stuff like that. To me those aren't the same thing. But that Future President/Princess thing makes me want to scream.

    I also hate the whole princess culture. My daughter likes princesses, but I try to steer her toward ones like Merida or Elsa, who don't end up with a boy in the end. When all is said and done I want her to CHOOSE who she wants to be (THATS feminism) but i can't help but try and give her gentle little nudges away from the superficial "fashionista" crap.
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  • However YOU want to raise your child, whether it's all the frills and lace for your daughter or tough guy toys for your son, that's fine. I don't need clothing companies and marketers encouraging boys to go into science fields and girls to stay home and be pretty.
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  • I typically prefer baby clothing without sayings and cute animals etc. It's good to know though that so many people appreciate it because there's a lot out there!  Different strokes for different folks :)  I was happy to find primary.com that offers baby and kid basics in solid colors. Even black :) 
  • However YOU want to raise your child, whether it's all the frills and lace for your daughter or tough guy toys for your son, that's fine. I don't need clothing companies and marketers encouraging boys to go into science fields and girls to stay home and be pretty.
    ^^^ this. And it also bothers me when others just assume things about my kid one way or the other. I swear to all things the first time someone tells this boy to "man up" I will bite them in the face. When we found out this baby was a boy my MIL lost her mind. "Now you have to buy stuff with trucks and puppies and monsters and blah blah blah!" She's very into traditional gender roles. 
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  • However YOU want to raise your child, whether it's all the frills and lace for your daughter or tough guy toys for your son, that's fine. I don't need clothing companies and marketers encouraging boys to go into science fields and girls to stay home and be pretty.
    ^^^ this. And it also bothers me when others just assume things about my kid one way or the other. I swear to all things the first time someone tells this boy to "man up" I will bite them in the face. When we found out this baby was a boy my MIL lost her mind. "Now you have to buy stuff with trucks and puppies and monsters and blah blah blah!" She's very into traditional gender roles. 
    Or when they tell them that they need to stop crying because boys don't cry! I work with a guy that's always talking about his son crying and him telling him to suck it up and be a man. No. You're teaching your son to avoid feeling and empathy.
  • I think I might be your MIL @runningisrad lol.  We're even doing a truck/construction themed nursery this time around.  I love traditional gender roles for little kids.  I am fully accepting that some do not accept traditional gender roles and that down the road we might learn that my sons don't identify with the gender they've been born into.. but until I know that, it's all trucks, sports and puppies in our house
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  • BernieRaeBernieRae member
    edited May 2016
    I believe tutus and capes (both worn by either girls or boys) are for dress up and not school or going about town.*

    *i have never had to dress and get a child ready to leave the house in the morning so we'll see how my opinion gels with real parenting life!

    ETA: I feel like I've written this in a past UO. IDK. Tired. 
  • However YOU want to raise your child, whether it's all the frills and lace for your daughter or tough guy toys for your son, that's fine. I don't need clothing companies and marketers encouraging boys to go into science fields and girls to stay home and be pretty.
    I don't think anyone is arguing this. I actually think the general consensus on here is that marketing in that direction is crap.






  • However YOU want to raise your child, whether it's all the frills and lace for your daughter or tough guy toys for your son, that's fine. I don't need clothing companies and marketers encouraging boys to go into science fields and girls to stay home and be pretty.
    I don't think anyone is arguing this. I actually think the general consensus on here is that marketing in that direction is crap.

    I think there are some on here who don't see it as a big deal, with the feeling that if you don't like it, then don't buy it. To me, it's a symptom of larger societal problems - that include the wage gap, ridiculous beauty standards, stigmas against feminism, people like Trump hurling the "women's card" at our first legitimate female presidential candidate (yes, I went there), etc, etc.
    Married 6/4/11
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    Due 9/14/16

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  • ThscaryThscary member
    I don't mind the sayings on kids clothes mostly. I already bought a few pieces that say "hunk" "daddy's allstar" and one with a whale that says "I'm a really great catch". But I don't know how I would feel about some of the sayings if we were having a girl. I can't believe that they make a girls onesie that says "I hate my thighs". That shit is infuriating 
  • However YOU want to raise your child, whether it's all the frills and lace for your daughter or tough guy toys for your son, that's fine. I don't need clothing companies and marketers encouraging boys to go into science fields and girls to stay home and be pretty.
    I don't think anyone is arguing this. I actually think the general consensus on here is that marketing in that direction is crap.

    I think there are some on here who don't see it as a big deal, with the feeling that if you don't like it, then don't buy it. To me, it's a symptom of larger societal problems - that include the wage gap, ridiculous beauty standards, stigmas against feminism, people like Trump hurling the "women's card" at our first legitimate female presidential candidate (yes, I went there), etc, etc.
    I agree 100% with you. 
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  • BernieRae said:
    I believe tutus and capes (both worn by either girls or boys) are for dress up and not school or going about town.*

    *i have never had to dress and get a child ready to leave the house in the morning so we'll see how my opinion gels with real parenting life!

    ETA: I feel like I've written this in a past UO. IDK. Tired. 
    I've totally let my daughter wear her dress-up stuff out. She's been out in a cape, a Merida dress, a Spider-Man costume, a mask... Not so much anymore now that she's older, but when she was 2-3 she loved wearing her costumes all over!
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  • However YOU want to raise your child, whether it's all the frills and lace for your daughter or tough guy toys for your son, that's fine. I don't need clothing companies and marketers encouraging boys to go into science fields and girls to stay home and be pretty.
    ^^^ this. And it also bothers me when others just assume things about my kid one way or the other. I swear to all things the first time someone tells this boy to "man up" I will bite them in the face. When we found out this baby was a boy my MIL lost her mind. "Now you have to buy stuff with trucks and puppies and monsters and blah blah blah!" She's very into traditional gender roles. 
    Or when they tell them that they need to stop crying because boys don't cry! I work with a guy that's always talking about his son crying and him telling him to suck it up and be a man. No. You're teaching your son to avoid feeling and empathy.
    THIS. 
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  • edited May 2016
    I never will forget when our nephew was about 2-3, he was writing with chalk at his grandparents (husbands parents) house. He was coloring with pink chalk and had gotten some on his clothes. My sister in law (his mom) came to pick him up and started teasing him for it, calling him a girl, asking if he was a little sissy, shit like that. I was LIVID, and he isn't even my child. 

    I fear for the person that tries to do something like that to my son. 
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  • However YOU want to raise your child, whether it's all the frills and lace for your daughter or tough guy toys for your son, that's fine. I don't need clothing companies and marketers encouraging boys to go into science fields and girls to stay home and be pretty.
    I don't think anyone is arguing this. I actually think the general consensus on here is that marketing in that direction is crap.

    I think there are some on here who don't see it as a big deal, with the feeling that if you don't like it, then don't buy it. To me, it's a symptom of larger societal problems - that include the wage gap, ridiculous beauty standards, stigmas against feminism, people like Trump hurling the "women's card" at our first legitimate female presidential candidate (yes, I went there), etc, etc.
    I agree with what you are saying about some of these clothing options planting seeds that continue gender inequality issues, but I also haven't read anything anyone has posted as being in favor of the onsies that say things like "I hate my thighs" or "I only date Super Heros". Some people have said they put their kids in clothing with sayings (I am one), but there are sayings on clothes that are not gender stereotypical and degrading. 

     






  • BernieRae said:
    I believe tutus and capes (both worn by either girls or boys) are for dress up and not school or going about town.*

    *i have never had to dress and get a child ready to leave the house in the morning so we'll see how my opinion gels with real parenting life!

    ETA: I feel like I've written this in a past UO. IDK. Tired. 
    My daughter isn't old enough to pick out her clothes yet, but I totally see this as a "pick your battles" kind of thing. 






  • AMT1107AMT1107 member
    I guess my UO would be I don't care about the shirts and onesies, my kid can't read and if I don't like the shirt, I won't buy it or put it on DS.  

    DS is into super-heroes (he's 3.5) if he wants to dress like a super hero and wear his Thor, Captain America, IronMan costumes or his  fireman boots with his fire jacket to the store, we let him, it's not about the gender stereotype, it's about what he likes.  This is what he wants and to be honest, he's 3, who cares. If I don't like it or feel it might be offensive, it doesn't make it into his drawers for him to pick in the morning. 

    There are tons of things in the store that I find "offensive", why do people need to wear a saying on the butt? So people can stare at your butt and try to figure out what it says?  I don't wear them, but to each their own, same goes for baby clothing. 
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  • However YOU want to raise your child, whether it's all the frills and lace for your daughter or tough guy toys for your son, that's fine. I don't need clothing companies and marketers encouraging boys to go into science fields and girls to stay home and be pretty.
    I don't think anyone is arguing this. I actually think the general consensus on here is that marketing in that direction is crap.

    I think there are some on here who don't see it as a big deal, with the feeling that if you don't like it, then don't buy it. To me, it's a symptom of larger societal problems - that include the wage gap, ridiculous beauty standards, stigmas against feminism, people like Trump hurling the "women's card" at our first legitimate female presidential candidate (yes, I went there), etc, etc.
    I agree with what you are saying about some of these clothing options planting seeds that continue gender inequality issues, but I also haven't read anything anyone has posted as being in favor of the onsies that say things like "I hate my thighs" or "I only date Super Heros". Some people have said they put their kids in clothing with sayings (I am one), but there are sayings on clothes that are not gender stereotypical and degrading. 

     
    I guess I read things a little differently than you. To each, her own. Just a hot button (to me) issue that I feel strongly about.
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  • @AMT1107 the problem there would be if you had a daughter and she also wanted to wear super heroe stuff and you would either buy her the pink version of the suit her stuff or make her wear princess stuff because she's a girl. 

    As as far as the tutu and capes conversation, husband and I have decided that on a daily basis, when baby starts wanting to dress himself, he must follow the following rules: some type of weather appropriate bottoms, some time of weather appropriate top, shoes (socks if needed) and a coat/jacket if needed. If he wants to wear a cape or a tutu on top of that, go for it. By giving him a choice of what to wear, hopefully he will fight less on days where he needs to wear something specific (school uniform, formal events, etc). 
  • I'd agree with @camichael84 - If my comments are being interpreted as saying that I like onesies saying "I hate my thighs" then I'm being misread. I do like pink, "girly" clothing for girls and I do like "macho man" outfits for boys.  To me, the two things can not be equated.. I'll bend enough to say that they're on the same, very long wavelength, perhaps... but are on such opposite ends of an extreme spectrum.
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  • AMT1107AMT1107 member
    @AMT1107 the problem there would be if you had a daughter and she also wanted to wear super heroe stuff and you would either buy her the pink version of the suit her stuff or make her wear princess stuff because she's a girl. 


    I'm okay with this, she can wear whatever she wants, why can't a girl wear an IronMan mask or a boy put on a tutu and dance around?  This is the time to show their independence and show the world what they love.  We let DS pick what he wants when we go to the store, if he has a gift card or money from the grandparents, we don't steer him towards the boy stuff or the girl stuff, we walk all of TRU.   If he wants to pick the pink kitchen set there, that's his choice. 

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  • However YOU want to raise your child, whether it's all the frills and lace for your daughter or tough guy toys for your son, that's fine. I don't need clothing companies and marketers encouraging boys to go into science fields and girls to stay home and be pretty.
    I don't think anyone is arguing this. I actually think the general consensus on here is that marketing in that direction is crap.

    I think there are some on here who don't see it as a big deal, with the feeling that if you don't like it, then don't buy it. To me, it's a symptom of larger societal problems - that include the wage gap, ridiculous beauty standards, stigmas against feminism, people like Trump hurling the "women's card" at our first legitimate female presidential candidate (yes, I went there), etc, etc.
    I kind of think that everyone here is saying the same thing, just that they're all saying it in a different way. I completely agree with you.
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