The Dreaded Baby Registry

sjo_thetwins

Hi ladies! I didn't want to hijack the other baby shower post about throwing your own, and turn it into a question about the actual gifts you are receiving. So, here's my question for anyone who has input. 

What at the hell do you put on the thing? This is our first and only pregnancy, with twins, so we literally have no clue. We don't want to put big ticket items on there like strollers and baby monitors, etc - if the price is really high - and have it look tacky. Is there a code of conduct on this? Do you just register for everything that you don't have and whatever isn't bought, you buy yourself? Do we take care of all the big ticket (or what I consider big ticket) items up front and leave them off of the registry? What are the do's and dont's of this? These checklists of all things baby are extensive and I want to register for things with options so that people who DO buy off of our registry aren't limited or forced into items they don't want to buy. Please halp! We don't want to come off as expectant or needy, but people (our moms in particular) are already asking about the registries. 

Thanks in advance!

waterfall213

Register for everything, big and small. People like to have options. Some people might go in together on a gift, I do that a lot with my mom and sister. Plus you get a discount on anything that's left on your registry. The coupon usually comes about s month before your due date. 

I wouldn't register for a lot of clothing. People will buy clothes anyway, especially if you know the baby's genders. 

ibabyloveb87

The only clothes I have registered for are solid white onesies and socks in various sizes because nobody buys anything in plain white and my friends with babies have ended up buying them after the baby. 

depineta

Thank you for asking this question, @sjo&thetwins! Every time I start to work on the registry I realize how much research I need to do, get frustrated, and give up. Basically I'm a mess and need all the help I can get! 

kmalls

REGISTER FOR EVERYTHING. Seriously. Anything you think you might possibly want or need, just put it on there. You'd be surprised how much is purchased for you, and for the items that aren't, you'll get the registry completion discount so it's a little easier to buy it yourself. Also it's a good idea to fudge your due date a little. You typically get the completion discount a few weeks before your due date, so if you move it up a bit you'll get the discount sooner. 

And like others have said, don't bother with clothes. You'll be gifted with whatever the purchaser thinks is cute anyway. 

sjo_thetwins

Awesome, thank you guys! I just didn't want to look like a total dick putting a $300 stroller and two $150 car seats on the registry on top of all the blankets, diapers, bottles, crap crap crap.

nlane0723

Register for EVERYTHING! Even the expensive items. If you register at BRU, you get registry rewards (between 5-10% cash back for anything purchased on your registry). 

Register for items you won't need until later (spoons, bowls, high chair, sippies, etc.).

Onesies, socks, and blankets are always good choices. We also registered for a lot of receiving blankets (they work wayyyyyy better as burp cloths).

Don't forget that BRU, you get a 10% discount for multiples! They let you use it every time you shop too.

kmalls

Oh and for those confused about what products are best, check out Lucie's List online. It's a godsend! 

CopperBoom86

waterfall213 said:

Register for everything, big and small. People like to have options. Some people might go in together on a gift, I do that a lot with my mom and sister. Plus you get a discount on anything that's left on your registry. The coupon usually comes about s month before your due date. 

I wouldn't register for a lot of clothing. People will buy clothes anyway, especially if you know the baby's genders. 

This. I go in together on gifts for showers all the time. Just recently, three friends and I split a $200 item from a wedding registry. Also, BRU has that whole "endless earnings" thing where you earn 10% back off every registry purchase. So register for EVERYTHING, even the stuff you plan on buying, and buy it off your registry so you get the 10% back. 

ETA: We registered for a couple clothing items just so people would know our style. I'm not a fan of pink, so we registered for a few onesie sets in teal and lavender. 

ignoscemihi

Agreed with all the other posters.  Definitely don't feel bad about registering for more expensive things.  People may want to go in together on bigger gifts.  As long as you have a range of options at different prices, no one will think you're being greedy.

UponAStar16

This is our first too, but I agree with what PPs said. People can just skip past things that are above their budget, and others may get together to buy the bigger items. It's just a list so at the end whatever isn't bought you just end up buying yourselves. And, there is usually a completion discount or coupon so after the shower(s) it can be a good idea to add things you want to stock up on, even things for yourself if it lets you add them (comfy pjs, etc), and/or to create registries at other places then.

FYI ladies, while making a BRU registry during my last pregnancy I made the mistake of selecting to allow it to be found online through TB, and we started getting tons of junk mail plus our info was all over the Internet courtesy of the multiple affiliated sites until I contacted them all directly asking them to remove it. I'm not doing that again and it's up to each person how much personal info they want to be shared and to show up indefinitely in a Google search, but just letting everyone know because it wasn't clear to me when I selected that option....

MKJeffrey2002

I agree with everyone. I register for everything big and small. I try to register for  a lot of items in the $15-25 range but a lot of my family goes in together on big ticket items so I hit everything that I might need.  

UponAStar16

Also, the checklists often have way more things than you actually need so it is helpful to consult with recent moms when you go scanning, to figure out what's most helpful/necessary

waterfall213

And ditto @UponAStar16 about registering for things for you after the shower to get the discount. I put breast pads, nipple cream, etc on my registry. 

von1976

This is our first. We'll be getting a lot of hand-me-downs so we didn't register for a ton of big ticket stuff, but I did put a glider and ottoman, a stroller, and a baby monitor on there. Then I put all kinds of other stuff we'll be needing: cloth diapers, cloth-safe diaper cream, baby lotion, bottles, breast pump parts, temporal thermometer, nasal aspirator, swaddling blankets, crib sheets, a diaper caddy, diaper pail, wet/dry bags, even baby's first halloween costume! I also put some books on there (Mayo Clinic's Baby's First Year, etc.), and a baby memory book. I did put some essential newborn clothing on there: onesies, socks, sleep sacks, and a few things up to 3 months in size--but we aren't finding out the sex and expect a ton of hand-me-down clothing regardless of what sex the baby turns out to be!

You can literally put anything you want on there that's baby-related. Just make sure there's plenty of things to choose from at all different price points. No one will be offended.

ignoscemihi

@sjo&thetwins I remember a few weeks (or months) back, there was a thread about what items btdt moms had found useful and what was worthless.  That might help if you want ideas about specific items to put on the registry.  https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12668475/btdt-moms-favorite-baby-tools-and-tools-you-didnt-need/p1

msBlackandGold

Like everyone has already said: register for any and everything. Big items and small items. There are times groups of friends will get together and pay for a big item and say "from all of us." And then you want the small items so that there are all price ranges there. Also, there often is a completion coupon that can be used after the baby is born, so you can get a discount on things that weren't purchased for you, but you said you wanted prior to the babies coming. 

Clothing, you can put on there, but in my experience, people who want to buy clothes buy what they think it cute. 

mizzkbrat

Unless you're my mom then she makes a rude comment "a $600 stroller? Are you kidding me?" 

Ha but we still had it on the registry! 

annabenanna

I had a wishlist on Amazon at first, that I eventually transferred into the Baby Registry.  We are registered for everything on there, from the Nose Frida to a Glider Recliner.  

kmvisioli

Ditto everyone else, but I would skip registering for clothes and blankets since people will buy them anyway. Some people go in on big items together, and even if you don't receive them as gifts you get to use the completion discount for it yourself. I set up several registries that are set to "secret" or "private" to get the coupons and discounts to use myself. Do register for things beyond just the first 6-months of age, like older baby toys and feeding supplies so you are set up for a bit longer. Don't register for a whole bunch of the same kind of bottle or pacifier, since you don't know what your baby will like (if any at all).

edit to add: one pack of swaddle blankets and one pack of receiving blankets on a registry is good. I was meaning people will give you knit/crochet and fluffy blankets regardless of registry.

JessK81

Another nice thing about registries is that you can still add stuff after your showers. I added a bunch of things after my shower with DS that I didn't realize I needed/wanted--handheld pump, nursing pads, etc--so I could use the completion discount. 

TNlove1027

I initially had one set up on Amazon but started liking some of Target's decor and bedding stuff and knew some people would rather have a local store to go to, so then I started that one and found out that now Target links their ONLINE registry (only Target items show up on the kiosk printout) to numerous other sites (BRU, Pottery Barn, Amazon, etc.) so we linked our Amazon and Etsy items to the Target site, and are just telling everyone and putting on baby shower invites we're registered at "target.com" for a one-stop-shop. I like Amazon because for our bigger ticket items that Target doesn't carry it has a "Best Seller" section to show you the top rated products for every category.

NoraAurora

kmalls said:

Oh and for those confused about what products are best, check out Lucie's List online. It's a godsend! 

+1, you must look at Lucie's List. She even has reviews & recommendations for twin stuff. I pretty much made my whole registry for DS off LL reviews, and I do not regret.

Also - it's a good idea to have multiple registries. As others have said, there are completion discounts offered most places for the last 6 weeks or so of your pregnancy, so you can purchase what you didn't get from the shower at a discount. Some places also give you new baby "gift bags" (Target & Amazon). Plus you will have older relatives who won't want to shop off amazon, and need to go into a store to buy. Or people who don't have a BRU or BBB nearby. 

kmvisioli

Another YES for Lucie's List! And if you need car seat installation tips/car buying advice check out carcrashdetective.com- he has tons of car seat reviews and specifically lists which cars and seats will fit 3 across if you need that.

lindzsers

One piece of advice I got from a friend, which I hadn't thought of, is to register for a second set of breast pump parts.  She got her breast pump covered through insurance, so once she found out the brand she would be covered for, she got a backup parts set just in case it broke, got dirty and she was tired and didn't want to clean it, etc.

NoraAurora

@lindzsers - good one. You definitely want enough sets so that you only need to wash them once a day, esp after you go back to work (if you plan to). 

mrsman2018

My husband and I have been purchasing the big ticket items because they have been on good sales. I have had friends tell me to stop buying them because they want to go in on something big. But at this point, I think most of our big ticket items we will have bought. 

owlcup

I agree with everyone else. Register for everything. Try to keep it "even" with high end, middle end and cheaper items. So there is something for everyone to potentially get. I wouldn't register for clothes or blankets though because odds are you will get a TON of those. I seriously had like 20 blankets for my first DD. 

AshleyGemini24

just did my registry at walmart and BRU. it seemed simple enough. I tried to keep it on the midprice range. But now that I have read through this thread, i will probably be going back into my registry and adding some things. I didnt think to add the things I will need later. But ya'll reminded me of the 10% bonus. Definatly going back in to add things. thanks for the advice on that ladies. 

nsquaredlife13

So sorry if this has already been suggested but check out Lucie's List!! They have a great gear guide and registry basics guide to get you started.

Also, Amazon's baby registry has some good guides to help you find things to register for.

Just as other's said, register for everything, register everywhere. I had maybe 4 or 5 registries. Didn't mean I shared them all, but having different registries at different stores was awesome when it came time for registry fulfillment. Most retailers (including Amazon) will give you a completion discount ranging from 10-20%, and sometimes a bunch of other great coupons.

rebeccuh

Thanks for the "register for everything" advice. I just started really looking at ours last night and felt weird putting things like pacifiers on it. Also, I'm another Lucie's List fan. Most of the stuff I'm adding is from their recs.

I'm using Baby List to organize everything (you can add things from anywhere, or include things like "help cooking meals" which is pretty cool.) I also started one on Amazon and one on Target and can import the link to Baby List so everything is in one spot. I'm mostly using it as a list for myself right now and plan on taking care of some of the more expensive stuff on my own, mostly because I feel like a dick having anything over $100 on there. 

Here's a question though: How do you register for bottles and nipples, since babies are little divas when it comes to those? Do you just put a few different kinds on the list and see which they like when they get here?

kmalls

Just something to think about when you're using Amazon for your registry: when I used it in 2015, so much stuff was excluded from the completion discount that I actually couldn't take advantage of the discount at all! I'm not sure if you can check ahead of time for exclusions, but it's worth taking a look.

nsquaredlife13

@rebeccuh a lot of bottle brands will sell starter kits. I would suggest registering for a couple of those, or just a few onesies of different bottles so you can try and find what works. Unfortunately some babies will refuse a dozen bottles before finding the one that works. We went through 4 different brands. Some will take the first bottle they have.

rebeccuh

@nsquaredlife13 Okay, that makes sense. I was that picky baby, according to my mom. Apparently there was a day my grandma was watching me at her house and she had the wrong kind of nipple, and all hell broke loose! 

kmvisioli

@kmalls I had that issue with my first, but this time around I noticed Amazon marks the items that are eligible with a little logo in the corner once it is on your registry list.

smmatt08

@rebeccuh I am registering at both BRU and Amazon. I made sure to put bottles on the BRU registry so that I can easily go to the store to exchange if baby doesn't like. Easier than shipping it off to Amazon!

rebeccuh

@smmatt08 That's smart! Thanks for the tip.

ignoscemihi

@kmalls I think they only allow the completion discount on things sold or shipped through Amazon.  So most items that are sold through a third-party seller aren't eligible.  And, like @kmvisioli mentioned, they now tell you if it's eligible on the registry - though I'm not sure that was the case when we made our registry in 2013.  (I only know this because I made a private registry with a double stroller so we could get the completion discount when we purchased it and it was eligible when I first put it on, but once it sold out through Amazon, they replaced it with the same stroller sold through a third-party seller and then it wasn't eligible.  Hopefully by the time August rolls around, it'll be back in stock from Amazon.)