How to know you are in the last two weeks of pregnancy (give or take a week :P )

VS2016

Within the first hour of being awake, no less than four people ask if you are still pregnant.  Why yes, thanks for reminding me.  
Every day takes a total of 9 years. 
You analyze every cramp hoping it is the start of the real thing. 
You panic thinking about the fact that you might be in labor... Soon

mmemartinez

Ugh I thought it was happening yesterday....I've had a terrible cold with cough and then our bathroom flooded so I cleaned that up. With that and the coughing I started having pretty consistent contractions....so my parents picked up DS and the dogs. Then, everything just stopped. So, boo. I'm convinced at this point baby will come once I'm finally done with this cold. But I've been sick now for two weeks, it keeps morphing into something new (all the kiddos at school are sick so I blame then).

Anyway tl;dr = I'm miserable and everything sucks 

valerie4786

mmemartinez said:

Anyway I'm miserable and everything sucks 

THIS.  I don't have a cold luckily (so sorry to hear about yours @mmemartinez ), but this statement is pretty spot on for how to know your in the last two weeks of pregnancy. 

thismakes4

Any one of us would be excited to have blood, water, and mucous coming out of our lady bits.

Normally we wouldn't .

avidkeo

All the above. I puked in the shower yesterday and got excited because I thought labour might be imminent. Nope still pregnant. 

BabyL52716

Low back pain. Tons of BH that also come with cramping that last awhile. Its a tease. 

VS2016

thismakes4 said:

Any one of us would be excited to have blood, water, and mucous coming out of our lady bits.

Normally we wouldn't .

This!!! A million times over!  When I wake up I check for a broken water and am disappointed every time!! Haha!

Karenpreggo

Last night I dreamed of flowing water and woke up and felt wet - yay waters broke! Nope. Just sweat (ew).  Got up, peed for the gazillionth time and went back to sleep.  

Ugh. 

saltedcaramel518

Every night, about the third time I wake up to pee, I contemplate just going back to sleep and risking peeing in the bed because it's just too hard to get up.

mrstmoose

When it seems like everyone on the BMB has had their baby except for you. 

KSkeld

Spylon

kitandcat

Oh my gosh... while I was getting ready this morning, I sneezed, and I didn't cover my mouth or nose at all because I was holding a makeup brush in one hand and blush in the other and it just came outta nowhere LOL... and I felt like it was like a mucus-y messy sneeze but I didn't see anything so I moved on with my life. 

RIGHT before I'm about to walk out of the house, my cat comes up and stretches up to my belly, and I saw a glimpse of something and pulled my shirt up and THERE WAS MUCUS ALL OVER IT. OMG. It was like right under my belly. I am so friggin happy I saw that and didn't show up to my last day of work covered in my own boogers. 

Long story short... How do I know I'm in the last two weeks of pregnancy? Because I'm friggin gross!! :-) 

jumpy57

Kit&Cat omg I'm trying so hard not to laugh out loud in cubicle land at work.

Pascal86

bshurdy said:

Every night, about the third time I wake up to pee, I contemplate just going back to sleep and risking peeing in the bed because it's just too hard to get up.

I have come close to crying when I wake up with nerve pain down one leg, because it means it's time for me to roll over to the other side, which is IMPOSSIBLE. I can't even remember what it's like to roll over to your other side in bed and have it not be the hardest thing I've ever done.

waldropra

Pascal86 said:

bshurdy said:

Every night, about the third time I wake up to pee, I contemplate just going back to sleep and risking peeing in the bed because it's just too hard to get up.

I have come close to crying when I wake up with nerve pain down one leg, because it means it's time for me to roll over to the other side, which is IMPOSSIBLE. I can't even remember what it's like to roll over to your other side in bed and have it not be the hardest thing I've ever done.

Lurker from June. This is exactly me. If I lay on one side too long, I get excruciating hip pain and have to roll over to the other side which makes me want to cry because of the pelvic pain that occurs when rolling over. Ugh. 

jenashawn

Pascal86 said:

bshurdy said:

Every night, about the third time I wake up to pee, I contemplate just going back to sleep and risking peeing in the bed because it's just too hard to get up.

I have come close to crying when I wake up with nerve pain down one leg, because it means it's time for me to roll over to the other side, which is IMPOSSIBLE. I can't even remember what it's like to roll over to your other side in bed and have it not be the hardest thing I've ever done.

This is me as well. It's insane how hard it is just to readjust in the middle of the night. I swear I spend half of the night trying to flip fro one side to the other.

KyleeWaller

When you're on your third day of eating Chipotle. 

katxattack1212

bshurdy said:

Every night, about the third time I wake up to pee, I contemplate just going back to sleep and risking peeing in the bed because it's just too hard to get up.

I have some Depends for the first post op days. I almost put one on the other night. I was so exhausted from peeing every hour. 

TinaTho

When you sneeze and pass gas at the same time while cuddling with DH on the couch and you don't even acknowledge it. Because what's the point. I'm no longer sorry that I'm gross.

valerie4786

TinaTho said:

When you sneeze and pass gas at the same time while cuddling with DH on the couch and you don't even acknowledge it. Because what's the point. I'm no longer sorry that I'm gross.

Or bend over and pass gas.  I have no control anymore and it's just a waste of my time to acknowledge it and apologize to Husband now because I just can't help it..

1mae2016

By feeling consistently disappointed. All. The. Time. Some days I feel so completely miserable and then the next I feel on top of the world just to have it crushed by debilitating sleepy-ness. Over the past few days I've been having menstrul like cramps but I've come to terms that it probably means nothing. Also, by dreading leaving the house because you know some stranger is going to say something along the lines of "When are you due? Oh, my! What are you doing out?!". I'm not a wild animal people, I don't belong in a cage. Thanks though. Because you do make me feel like attacking you. 

AdorkablePixie

valerie4786 said:

TinaTho said:

When you sneeze and pass gas at the same time while cuddling with DH on the couch and you don't even acknowledge it. Because what's the point. I'm no longer sorry that I'm gross.

Or bend over and pass gas.  I have no control anymore and it's just a waste of my time to acknowledge it and apologize to Husband now because I just can't help it..

I bend over and pass gas at the gym pretty much every day and I'm not sorry. I don't care anymore. At home when I do it and it's loud I'll blame it on the dogs (because that's what we do..). And it seems like anything I eat lately (or don't eat) makes me SO GASSY!

gingerbride26

So glad I found this one today...I am just so over being pregnant today.  The constant questions and poking.

For the last 2 weeks or so I've been having what seems like labor - contractions very different from BH, very regular, increasing in pain, get to the 5/1/1 point...then POOF all stops. Every day they get stronger than the day before and last a bit longer but every day it eventually fizzles. At this point this kid is going to be born in the car because I don't trust my body any more.  Found descriptions online of "prodromal labor" and that's exactly what it seems like.  I know they are at least somewhat "productive" contractions because I've progressed to almost fully effaced and 2 cm as of Monday.  So frustrating and physically and emotionally exhausting.

@valerie4786 - I actually let out a huge belch yesterday and didn't acknowledge it because I barely notice it any more lol DH laughed his butt off.

galain

Every time I have a BH my husband asks if it's time to go to the hospital.