need tips leaving baby for work

jarob747

I need some advice on leaving my LO. We have never been away from each other at all. I go back in less than 2 weeks, May 11th for a 15 hr day. Should I wait till then to be away or should I ease into it for an hr or two here and there? If so, How much should I be away now and how often? I'd rather wait as I don't wanna be away 1 second longer than I have to, but don't wanna make it so hard on LO. I'm gonna be a mess  regardless. I just need some tips on how you all did it.

VitaLuna

I left DD1 with my mom twice before going back (also gone 14hr/day). I just left her for a couple hours while I ran errands. Is your kiddo going to daycare? If so, maybe do a couple days the week before. 

ETA:  make sure you have something to keep yourself busy while you're away from LO, otherwise you'll just stress the whole time!

Sarahbara60

I go back next week full time and the last few weeks I've been working up to it by taking me time and getting out of the house for a few hours once or twice a week.  It's really helped me and has given DD some good bonding time with her papa.  Now we'll see how it actually goes next week when I'm gone for 9+ hours...

robinj716

I thought I was going to be a mess the morning of, but surprisingly I wasn't. This was my first week back. Leaving the LO with his daddy has helped a lot though, so I'm lucky in that aspect. I also get to go home for lunch so I see him before I leave for work and mid-day, so that helps too. I've left him alone before with his dad for grocery shopping and errands, so I was used to leaving him for a few hours here and there and I would recommend doing that just to get accustom to leaving LO behind. 

jarob747

Thanks, he will be with my neice on Wednesdays and daddy every other weekend as that's all I'll be working.  I'm not worried about neice or hubby being able to watch LO but needed to know how to transition. I'll work on leaving for a little while here and there over the next two weeks. Thanks so much for the advice. Guess we will all get through it huh. 

meg+on+the+DL

I thought my little one would have a harder time being away from me. Turned out... it was way harder on me! We had only been apart for maybe 8 hours in the 8 weeks she'd been alive. She tended to fuss when other people held her and I was around. My first day back, she was home with dad. She did awesome! Slept well and took a bottle perfectly. The next day was a daycare day. Another awesome day. They just adore her there and they think she is the easiest baby. She saves her hangry screams and sleepless nights for mama now! 

bookishbaker

I'm returning to work on the same day- it's a Wednesday so I'm planning on taking LO to daycare on Monday and Tuesday to help with the transition.

Ju111310

I think it's way harder on us than them. At this age, mine tends to be pretty happy as long as someone is feeding, changing, snuggling and giving him naps lol I don't think he "misses" me when I'm at work like I miss him. His little brain just doesn't function that way yet. I think as long as the niece/hubby know her routine than they'll all be fine without a transition period. 

However, it was really hard leaving DS1 this go around bc at 20 months old he realizes that mommy has been home every day for the past three months and now she's not. That's tough. But we'll all get through it and you'll likely even enjoy the adult interaction at work. I would absolutely love to be a SAHM but it's not in the cards for our family -- my husband is a self employed farmer and a type 1 diabetic so we have to have good insurance. I have a great job with good insurance so I have to go to work. It breaks my heart to leave my boys but I do enjoy myself at work. 

BabyHope2013

Just wrapping up my first week back to work with my second. I think its way harder on us than it is baby. I think more so with my second now, I realize that as long as their needs are being cared for (being fed, changed etc) they are happy. My advice would be that only try a trial run if you feel like you need to step away and come back for yourself. Otherwise, soak in every minute in with that LO. You're going to miss it. Just know that you will get into a routine in a few weeks and it will become your new normal. 

jarob747

I don't need a break and don't want one. I can't even imagine how hard it's going to be. I know he will be well cared for, but in gonna miss him so so much! It's a good thing in an RN so I'll be busy at least. 

meg+on+the+DL

@jarob747 Jusg for your sanity, I would suggest trying to get as close to that routine now. I have to get up at 5:30am for work. And I had been sleeping in with LO every day. (She'd wake to eat around 6:30/7 and sleep until 10am). Holy sh**!! I thought I was going to die those first few weeks. I came home exhausted every day. 

dcaron10

I have to go back to work the 9th and I am stressing about it too. I have left DS with my MIL a few times for a few hours and she is going to be the one taking care of him so I'm not worried about that. However, my husband is the one that will have to get him ready in the morning and get him to his parents house and I'm a little worried about that. My husband is not a morning person. I am also an RN and I am worried about how I am going to pump at work. We are usually so busy that you barely have time to eat lunch or go to the bathroom. I know it will take a little while to get a routine but I'm just nervous about all of it.

mrsc12414

I'm not a nurse but I'm a tech on a very busy peds floor. Finding time to pump has been hard . Some people are more understanding then others. I just finished week two back and it's been awful I still cry the whole way in . I work nights and my husband is awful with routine and can't get baby to sleep in crib so gives up and puts her in the swing . I'm desperately trying to break this habit and knowing I have to start over every time I work is awful. Babygirl has done good though she just nurses super long when I'm finally home

VitaLuna

@dcaron10 my advice is that you absolutely have to make it a priority. It's hard when we put everyone else first and are so busy. Charting can wait, scheduled meds can wait, go pump for 15-20 min and get right back at it. Your charting and 9am docusate pass won't know the difference. I also make sure I don't leave anything for my "buddy" to do, which helps people to be more willing to cover you. 

dcaron10

@VitaLuna yes it is definitely hard to put yourself first at work. Thank you for the advice, I know I'm going to have to learn to put things off to go pump. I have a really good group of women I work with so I know they will help me when they can. I feel like it's just one more thing to juggle in an already busy day!

VitaLuna

dcaron10 said:

@VitaLuna yes it is definitely hard to put yourself first at work. Thank you for the advice, I know I'm going to have to learn to put things off to go pump. I have a really good group of women I work with so I know they will help me when they can. I feel like it's just one more thing to juggle in an already busy day!

I became super efficient at work, that's for sure. When I stopped pumping (at 14mos) I felt like I had so much free/down time at work. Pack snacks and a lunch that you can eat while pumping, since you're definitely not going to get any other breaks during the day. 

jarob747

Ya I've got a room to pump in and I work with a great group also so I'm praying I can pump at least every 3-4 hours. Do you think that will be a good amount of time? That would be 3 times during my time gone. I'm so nervous and don't want my supply to drop. That's a huge fear of mine. 

VitaLuna

jarob747 said:

Ya I've got a room to pump in and I work with a great group also so I'm praying I can pump at least every 3-4 hours. Do you think that will be a good amount of time? That would be 3 times during my time gone. I'm so nervous and don't want my supply to drop. That's a huge fear of mine. 

It really depends on how much you're producing. You'll know after the first day if 3x will be enough. I had trouble pumping enough and just broke even with her bottle needs every day, so I pumped 4x/day (~9am, 12, 3, 6.. That 6:00 one was rough that close to shift change). Most of my pumping coworkers did 3x/shift. 

ambdtb

I'm starting back to work today.  I'm going to try for pumping at 1130am, 3pm and 5pm. I hope I can get away ok at these times every day.  My LO is home with DH for the first couple days before daycare starts next week. First daycare week will be super tough. Not looking forward to it!'