intro (+ anyone doing fertility treatments?)

BrightenMySky

Hello, I figured I would introduce myself over here.  I have been more active on the miscarriage/loss board and lurking over here (and before that, I was on the IF and TTTC boards a bit).  I found out I was pregnant at the beginning of Dec after our 3rd IUI cycle.  I had had a cyst that cycle that seemed to prevent multiple follicles from growing, so I was kind of bummed during the cycle but obviously it did not matter.  Missed m/c at 11 weeks at the end of January.  It took my body weeks to get back to normal.  I had a d&c shortly after we found out about the loss, a few days later was given cytotec in the ER after going in for pain, and then my HCG very slowly fell.  

I recently started a new IUI cycle as I got my period a week ago finally.  I had been a little up in the air about what I wanted to do, but we have so many out-of-town obligations this spring and early summer, I am not sure if I will be able to schedule treatments whenever I want to do so, so it seemed like I should take advantage and get one in now.  Before the pregnancy, I had been ready to do 6 IUIs and then go onto IVF.  But now I feel like maybe we should just keep going with IUIs since it worked for us once.  I know I don't have to decide now, and I really hope I never have to make that call because I get my rainbow before that, but it's hard not to think ahead.  Anyone in a similar boat?

BornReady

Hi there, so sorry for your loss. I hang out over here mostly, but remember you from/recently intro'd on the infertility board as well. I am in the midst of my first clomid/iui cycle and we are dealing with MFI as well. The plan for me is 1 IUI and moving straight to IVF next cycle. We are 100% covered by insurance either way though, so I think they are being super aggressive because of that. We were told our chances are about that or less of a "normal" couple with IUI (15-20%), but closer to 60% with IVF/ICSI. With that said we have conceived naturally twice on our own, so maybe we'll get lucky with the IUI?

I know what you mean about trying to work around all of the commitments of working with the RE. I have been shocked by the amount of appointments, blood draws, ultrasounds etc. that I have been working around. Really crazy. Good luck with whatever you decide. It's always a fine line for me, being hopeful that something will work, but always wanting to keep planning in case it doesn't. It try and take month to month (maybe day to day or hour to houe!).

ThePax89

Hi, there. No experience with treatments, but I'm glad to see you over here and I'm wishing you the best of luck. 

roxgibbons

@BrightenMySky I will be starting back on IUIs later in May as my dr decided to give me a break after my  hysteroscopy. H and I had a big discussion about this as he wanted us to try naturally since we ended up conceiving naturally and I wanted to jump to IVF because of my age and success rates- but ultimately we decided to resume the IUIs which is what my RE advised as well and IVF is completely OOP for us. I also had a good response to meds on my last two IUIs so I'm hoping the next couple cycles will do the trick. I completely understand the challenge of scheduling. May and June are pretty light for us scheduling wise so I figured I'd take advantage and get a couple of treatments in. July- Sept will be more of a challenge. I'm glad you're back on track. Did you start meds for this cycle? 

BrightenMySky

@roxgibbons yes, just had my last dose of Clomid last night, and I go in for monitoring Thursday.  If this is like my other 3 cycles, I would trigger Thursday evening and IUI Saturday, so I am hoping my cycle has evened out enough (plus the meds should help) that I'll be on that schedule again.  It is hard to let go of everything not being the same as it was when we were successful (acupuncture immediately before and after, just because of how the schedule worked out), but I know that will add a lot of stress, plus there was a genetic issue likely due to how the egg/sperm interacted, so maybe I shouldn't even want to replicate the conditions.  I am trying not to get my hopes up, but since it worked once, I just really hope it will work again and soon.  And I am glad you have the hysteroscopy behind you and can get back into treatments as you want to do so.

roxgibbons

@BrightenMySky Good luck this week! I hope it all goes as planned and you are able to do your IUI this weekend.  I understand being anxious and wanting it to work soon. I feel the exact same way  This will be my first time doing acupuncture in conjunction with treatment, so I'm interested to see how it will all works out.   FX! and I hope you have some nice big mature follies to work with.

mylittleversailles

I'm not undergoing fertility treatment, but I wanted to say hello and sorry for your loss. FX for you.

fivetimesnoluck

I am sorry for your loss and will keep you in my thoughts as you get ready for another cycle. I recently had my first medicated TI cycle and just got the protocol for our next one after getting a BFN. Our RE thinks that even with the shitty hand I have been dealt, he can potentially help us achieve our goal of a healthy, full-term pregnancy. After discussion and a lot of consideration, we decided to try one more time before moving into other, more in-depth assisted reproductive programs. If we suffer another loss, we would likely move to IVF with a frozen donor egg.

It is definitely difficult to not think ahead. I have a million methods I use to try and help me stay present, but it's a daily struggle.

Fingers crossed we will all reach our goals soon!

BrightenMySky

@roxgibbons do you have an IUI coming up?  I am triggering tonight and IUI Saturday.  I was nervous because I had a lot of spotting, which I never had before w/Clomid, but everything still looks good.  How are you liking the acupuncture?  I am going tomorrow, looking forward to it.

roxgibbons

@BrightenMySky that's awesome!! Good luck with the IUI!  I'm glad everything looks good and the spotting is not an issue. I know it's been a long road for you getting your cycle back post loss so I am thrilled for you that you were able to get a treatment going and you are back in it.

So unfortunately I couldn't get an IUI in this cycle because my hysteroscopy was more invasive then expected as I had fibroids and not a polyp. My RE wants to skip this cycle and wait for the next. I am currently on CD 14 and waiting to O. My RE said we are free to try on our own this cycle but I'm not holding my breath. If my cycle is the same as before, then I should be doing an IUI third week of May or so. It sucks waiting for the cycle before the treatment cycle- waiting is the worst.

I'm loving acupuncture so far. I went in on Tuesday and she did some techniques to help stimulate ovulation so I'm hoping it works. I go once a week and it's been really nice and if anything it definitely has been helping manage my stress.

I've been hanging out on the May IUI board as well- you should join the fun

BrightenMySky

@roxgibbons thank you.  I hear you on the waiting, although I am glad you are cleared to try now if you want to and can do an IUI next cycle.  I have been on the IUI threads before...I need to find the right balance on the boards to manage anxiety, so we will see.  And I am glad you are liking acupuncture.  

BornReady

@BrightenMySky We have the same timeline, trigger tonight and IUI on Saturday. See you in the TWW!

roxgibbons

That's great @BornReady! Good luck!! Hoping for quick TWW for the both of you and of course BFPs

@BrightenMySky that's totally fair about the boards. I get anxious sometimes as well getting into all the detail on the threads. I'll check in with you here. 

fivetimesnoluck

Do you have to wait a full two weeks for betas after IUIs? I've got my fingers crossed for you both, @BornReady and @BrightenMySky!

I took 1/2 pill clomid tonight, take another tomorrow, Menopur Sunday and the u/s to evaluate my follicle(s) will be Monday. If we get to trigger, I will be close behind you all in the TWW.  

BornReady

@fivetimesnoluck Yup, my beta draw is May 14th so exactly 2 weeks out. My luteal phase is usually shorter than that though, so I assume I will know before then. 

Good luck to you starting this new cycle!

BrightenMySky

@BornReady I knew someone was my trigger buddy, I just did not remember who, sorry.  I made myself bleed with the shot, I'm out of practice.  I am not sure if my RE's office does betas on Saturday.  With my first 2 IUIs, I got AF either right before or on the way to the doctor for my beta, so with IUI #3 I scheduled the beta for 2 days later to try to avoid that stress.  Plus I'll be out of town the weekend of the 14th, so I probably won't be able to go for a beta until the following Tuesday.   If AF hasn't showed by then, I'll be super happy.  Fx for you this cycle!

@fivetimesnoluck GL with this cycle!

catiecatp

Fingers crossed for each and every one of you

BrightenMySky

Right back at you @catiecatp.  

mylittleversailles

Fingers and toes crossed for everyone! 

SnobunnieMel

Good luck everyone!! So much to look forward to 

cooaladolly

Good luck ladies with your IUI's! FX for all the upcoming procedures and for BFP's in the upcoming weeks!

roxgibbons

@BornReady and @BrightenMySky how did your IUIs go?

BornReady

IUI is all done. Piece of cake. DH took a some time to "produce a sample" and I was worried as the minutes ticked by that it wasn't going to happen. His friend last week told him about his inability to produce a sample for an IUI once and he said it got in his head. They also just put the men in the exam room and none of the rooms have locks on them, so he was paranoid, understandably. 

Anyways, sperm count was still OK after wash, above their minimum where they see little difference in success rates and motility was good. I started cramping/ovulating about 2 hours after the procedure so hopefully timing was good. Thanks for asking!

BrightenMySky

I'm done, too.  I have been cramping since yesterday and am pretty uncomfortable.  Aside from walking the dog, trying to take it easy today.  I was a little worried about my DH since he got a stomach bug last night, but he was still able to do his part.  He was feeling pretty ill when he was sitting in the room with me during and after the procedure.  It reminded me a lot of when we went to the ER several days after my d&c and ended up getting cytotec for retained material, because he had pretty bad food poisoning while I was being taken care of and didn't want to get separately checked in and be apart from me, but I had to drive us home after that he was in such bad shape.  Not exactly pleasant memories.  Anyway, hoping he's on his way to recovery.  

@BornReady no locks sounds stressful.  I think at our clinic they send you to the bathroom...DH was expecting a little nicer or maybe more discreet, but that's the way it goes.  And thanks for asking @roxgibbons!

BornReady

@BrightenMySky Glad all went well! I was pretty uncomfortable yesterday afternoon. I guess releasing that many eggs takes a toll on the body. I can only imagine what egg retrieval for IVF is like with many more eggs. Hope you're feeling more comfortable today!

roxgibbons

Glad your IUIs went well! I remember always being uncomfortable after IUIs and even a couple days afterwards. Glad you are both done and starting TWW. I've been waiting to O. Historically OPKs work well for me but I've been testing and no positives. I had some significant cramping yesterday so I'm thinking maybe and I know OPKs don't indicate that you ovulated but I just want some sign that my body is getting back on track. I guess it makes sense for it to be off with everything (procedures and coming off BCPs). I'm just frustrated with my body and this process. Lots of triggers lately. 

BrightenMySky

Hugs @roxgibbons. 

roxgibbons

I finally got a + on my OPK this morning- a little late but to be expected. Finally!

runfast

I am doing fertility meds. Just had a miscarriage from a medicated IUI. We are starting IVF once my HCG gets to zero. I have no idea how long that is going to be and it's make me crazy. We were planning to start if the IUI didn't work and I keep thinking if it hadn't worked we'd be ready for the retrieval this week. Sucks having to delay things. 

BrightenMySky

Are you having weekly draws @runfast? Mine took a long time (I posted in your thread on the miscarriage board) and it was so hard to wait. I had anomie bleeding at one point and when in for a baseline (I hoped), only to find out my hcg was still triple digits. I hear you about the delay. And this loss experience has changed my view about treatments a little. At least for now. 

runfast

@BrightenMySky Yeah I am going in weekly. It is so painful to even be in the clinic and see pregnant woman. Everything is hard right now. How do you mean it has changed your view of treatments? Do you think you will hold off a bit? I want to get started immediately because it is the only way I can see myself feeling better. But I can't unfortunately.

BrightenMySky

@runfast can you do blood draws with your RE? That's what I did, in part because I like my RE and dislike my OB (was in the process of switching when the baby died), plus I didn't want to be seeing so many pregnant people like that. And I just mean I am not sure about IVF anymore. My plan had previously been 6 IUIs then onto IVF, but now I'm not sure because this loss has been so crushing, I don't know if I could go through so much with IVF and then be so worried about loss. Plus IUI worked once, so that is somewhat reassuring. I'm still planning to do 6 total in any case, so I'll reevaluate then if I want to keep going as I have been, move on to IVF or what. 

roxgibbons

@BrightenMySky  @BornReady  How are you both doing during TWW? When are you testing? I just thought it may be easier to check in with you both here as I know we all post on multiple threads. 

I'm 8 or 9 days DPO and just waiting it out. I had jury duty which was a nice distraction but I'm back at work now. FX for you both!

BornReady

Thanks for checking in! I am 11 DPiui. I was feeling hopeful and positive, but today I've crashed into a more negative head space. This is my usual TWW emotional roller coaster. My beta is on Saturday and they told me I have to go whether I'm getting BFN or not. I have chosen not to test yet, but came close yesterday afternoon of all times. Still undecided if I will test or be "beta or bust". I'm not sure if I could handle the stress of listening to the beta numbers or if I'd just prefer to see a negative test. So many decisions!

FX for you too!

BrightenMySky

Thanks @roxgibbons! I am doing ok. Beta isn't until Tuesday because I'm out of town this weekend.  Hard to stay positive but not get my hopes up. DH is staying home while I travel this weekend, so I'm a little nervous that I'll get AF and be upset, but he won't be there with me. 

roxgibbons

@BornReady I tested early once in my last IUI and it did soften the blow of the negative from the Beta, but I guess see how you feel. Either way waiting for the line or the numbers is hard- I totally hate it! I hope this is your cycle!  BTW- I also go through the emotional roller coaster as well and one day I'm so positive and the next I'm sad and defeated and quite frankly tired of this process.  GL to you on Saturday!!

@BrightenMySky  It's a tough balance of being positive but not get my hopes up. I want to be optimistic but the last few months have really taken a toll. DH is convinced we'll be successful soon since my fibroids were removed but I'm not so sure plus we didn't do a treatment this cycle and just tried so that makes me feel like our chances are slim. I hope AF stays away and you get your BFP next week

 

BrightenMySky

Well I am out, as I'm pretty sure AF started today (not feeling pregnant + seems heavy for implantation bleeding).  In a way I am...relieved?  Part of it is that if AF came in a few days, I probably wouldn't have the option of another IUI this cycle because of work commitments & schedule, so now I can do my baseline tomorrow and probably have that option.  But I also wonder if I know that PGAL will be so many ups and downs and anxious moments.  I did have a glass of bubbly & rare tuna at lunch (we happened to be celebrating a work-related victory, and we don't usually drink at work lunches, so it was a nice treat and celebration).  

Hope things are going better for you @roxgibbons and @BornReady.  

roxgibbons

@BrightenMySky I'm sorry about AF but I'm glad you're ok about it and that you didn't get it while you were away. I hope the timing for your next IUI works out well. I feel the same way about PGAL although it would be amazing to be successful, I know I'll be a wreck and  dealing with another loss would be devastating. I can't believe it's mid may already and this year started with the best news ever and now I'm just getting back to trying. Sorry for the rant but sometimes this whole experience just seems surreal. I'm ok right now just waiting out my TWW. This was our natural cycle while my RE was giving me a break from procedures so we'll see what happens- if BFN I should be back on Femara later next week to start my next IUI.  If I don't get AF I'll POAS on Wednesday. Glad you got a treat of bubbly  

BrightenMySky

@roxgibbons I know this year started out so blissfully lovely, and now between the loss and our dog getting diagnosed with cancer, it's turned supremely shitty.  Also, with how long it took for my HCG to drop and everything to be ok to start TTC again, it looks so unlikely I'll be pregnant before my due date (mid-August), which I try not to think about too much.  Do you think the break with doing a natural cycle this round helped you physically and/or emotionally?  

BornReady

Ladies, I have a question for you about a natural cycle break. I am moving to IVF, but with the upcoming end of this cycle, there isn't enough time to get everything settled with insurance to cycle right away. That means I'll have 1 cycle until we can start sims for my IVF. I asked for an IUI and they said no, because they'd be telling the insurance company conflicting messages about my needs. What do you guys think about doing a clomid/TI cycle versus taking a cycle off of ovary stimulation?

Sorry about the upcoming due date, @BrightenMySky . I thought I would be pregnant by mine too, but doesn't look like that will happen for me either by June7th. 

BrightenMySky

@BornReady thanks and sorry about your upcoming due date, too.  

I was/am actually thinking about doing clomid/TI if my RE agrees & I cannot do an IUI because of travel this cycle.  I had a cyst on my baseline this morning, so depending on bw I might be able to start meds right away (in which case I could do the IUI), or I might have to come back next week to see, which would probably be too late on timing, we'll see.  I cannot remember if you are unexplained IF or have another diagnosis, but depending on that, it might be worth thinking about clomid/TI.  Your DH won't be getting a boost from the wash & IUI, but you still will be getting the clomid boost.  One thing on my mind is the 6 lifetime max usage for clomid, which I am not sure if it's even that real of a restriction anymore (my RE said that the reasons have turned out to be not an issue, but he didn't come out and say I could do unlimited clomid).  Since I have done 4 clomid cycles, I might not want to "waste" one if I can only use it 2 more times, because I respond well to it and we haven't seen a reason to switch to other stims.  Another issue could be if you get cysts from the clomid cycle and then it throws off when you want to start IVF.