UO??

purplefan1

Today is Thursday, isn't it?? I wanna hear the UOs of the day.

AmberLiz99

I think it's silly to have your husband come to every prenatal appointment with you (unless you're high risk). What's the point of both of you having to take off work? 

I get the big ones, but every time is pointless to me. 

purplefan1

I don't like little girls in bikinis. Babies, toddlers, young children, adolescents, and I'm actually torn on whether or not they are appropriate for teens (16-18) And it seems like a slippery slope-you dress the kid in a bikini while they are young and you either let them continue wearing bikinis or you eventually have to explain that some people are pedophiles and will sexualize their young bodies and since they are developing they have to cover up. Tankinis are awesome or just go full one piece. And I'm a HUGE fan of those surfer girl shirts with the sleeves. Cover the sensitive skin up from the sun!!

Edit for words

AmberLiz99

June2016BabyW said:

I don't like little girls in bikinis. Babies, toddlers, young children, adolescents, and I'm actually torn on whether or not they are appropriate for teens (16-18) And it seems like a slippery slope-you dress the kid in a bikini while they are young and you either let them continue wearing bikinis or you eventually have to explain that some people are pedophiles and will sexualize their young bodies and since they are developing they have to cover up. Tankinis are awesome or just go full one piece. And I'm a HUGE fan of those surfer girl shirts with the sleeves. Cover the sensitive skin up from the sun!!

Edit for words

Agree!

mimi_8607

I hate printed leggings! Lularoe has some of the ugliest prints and these girls on my Facebook are going crazy over them. What am I missing?! They are ugly and over priced!

purplefan1

Oh! Thanks for that @mimi_8607. I also can't stand leggings on preteens or teens. 

Or booty shorts on babies/toddlers. I think the mix between summer coming up and the worry that I will have a little girl and have no way to dress her with the current clothing offerings is making me nervous. I feel like girls clothing particularly has become so skimpy and too sexy. Your 10 year old shouldn't look like she is in college or getting ready for a night at the bar!

And why in the name of all that is holy would there ever need to be low rise skinny jeans for girls OR boys?? My nephew showed his entire buttcrack to the congregation at church on Easter Sunday because of those pants. 

lm45678

AmberLiz99 said:

I think it's silly to have your husband come to every prenatal appointment with you (unless you're high risk). What's the point of both of you having to take off work? 

I get the big ones, but every time is pointless to me. 

DH has pretty much stopped coming- I literally pee on a stick, have my BP checked and listen to the Doppler for 30 seconds. Now that we're done with ultrasounds, he won't be coming except for the big ones (36 weeks).

almostpriceless

@June2016BabyW it's a horrible thing to have to say, but I have a 15 year old, so this is experience talking. You have to explain pedophiles and every other kind of sex crime to them eventually, no matter what they wear. Which I guess is kind of my UO. 

I firmly believe that there are age appropriate conversations for children of all ages about sexuality and their bodies. People who avoid these conversations freak me out. I also have a 15 year old niece who is incredibly naive. She's my daughters best friend.  The body of a girl who had been murdered and assaulted was found on the campus of the college my daughter wants to attend just a few weeks ago. When she mentioned it to her cousin she had to explain what that meant. In less that 3 years my niece will be off to college and have a 1/5 chance of being sexually assaulted, but had no idea what that actually meant. If kids don't know the truth about these things then they cannot protect themselves or their peers. 

purplefan1

almostpriceless said:

@June2016BabyW it's a horrible thing to have to say, but I have a 15 year old, so this is experience talking. You have to explain pedophiles and every other kind of sex crime to them eventually, no matter what they wear. Which I guess is kind of my UO. 

I firmly believe that there are age appropriate conversations for children of all ages about sexuality and their bodies. People who avoid these conversations freak me out. I also have a 15 year old niece who is incredibly naive. She's my daughters best friend.  The body of a girl who had been murdered and assaulted was found on the campus of the college my daughter wants to attend just a few weeks ago. When she mentioned it to her cousin she had to explain what that meant. In less that 3 years my niece will be off to college and have a 1/5 chance of being sexually assaulted, but had no idea what that actually meant. If kids don't know the truth about these things then they cannot protect themselves or their peers. 

I agree completely that these conversations have to be had (which truly is just horrifying to know). And it's not that I would consider NOT having the conversation. I think since I work with kids who have been molested and sexually abused, I am probably more likely to have the conversation fairly early on (the focus can't just be on "stranger danger" any more people). However, I still think when you put little girls in clothing that should (or shouldn't) be meant for older women, you are setting a trend for what they consider to be a norm. I have friends who let their kids wear bikinis throughout their childhood but once they told them they couldnt around the age of 12, the kids argued about it because it is what they have always done. I actually had a 14 year old come in for counseling with her mom not too long ago wearing shorts that would make a volleyball player blush. I told her she couldn't come to session in those any more. Both she and her mom looked really surprised and then her mom said "I told her they were too short." Then why did you buy them for her and why did you let her leave the house in them??!?! Oh...because you yourself are wearing those ridiculous patterned leggings. The kids argument? " I always wear stuff like this." 

almostpriceless

June2016BabyW said:

almostpriceless said:

@June2016BabyW it's a horrible thing to have to say, but I have a 15 year old, so this is experience talking. You have to explain pedophiles and every other kind of sex crime to them eventually, no matter what they wear. Which I guess is kind of my UO. 

I firmly believe that there are age appropriate conversations for children of all ages about sexuality and their bodies. People who avoid these conversations freak me out. I also have a 15 year old niece who is incredibly naive. She's my daughters best friend.  The body of a girl who had been murdered and assaulted was found on the campus of the college my daughter wants to attend just a few weeks ago. When she mentioned it to her cousin she had to explain what that meant. In less that 3 years my niece will be off to college and have a 1/5 chance of being sexually assaulted, but had no idea what that actually meant. If kids don't know the truth about these things then they cannot protect themselves or their peers. 

I agree completely that these conversations have to be had (which truly is just horrifying to know). And it's not that I would consider NOT having the conversation. I think since I work with kids who have been molested and sexually abused, I am probably more likely to have the conversation fairly early on (the focus can't just be on "stranger danger" any more people). However, I still think when you put little girls in clothing that should (or shouldn't) be meant for older women, you are setting a trend for what they consider to be a norm. I have friends who let their kids wear bikinis throughout their childhood but once they told them they couldnt around the age of 12, the kids argued about it because it is what they have always done. I actually had a 14 year old come in for counseling with her mom not too long ago wearing shorts that would make a volleyball player blush. I told her she couldn't come to session in those any more. Both she and her mom looked really surprised and then her mom said "I told her they were too short." Then why did you buy them for her and why did you let her leave the house in them??!?! Oh...because you yourself are wearing those ridiculous patterned leggings. The kids argument? " I always wear stuff like this." 

I agree 100% about the clothing. I see kids all the time that make me wonder how they even ended up with the shit they are barely wearing. If they are with an adult then the adult almost always makes me think "Oh, that's why" once I see what they are wearing. 
I am probably also one of those people who had some of the conversations with my oldest at time time that would be deemed "too early" by some people. It's awful to have to talk about these things at all, but you are so right, it's not just about stranger danger anymore. One thing I have wondered that you might be able to offer insight on is what these conversations are like for the parents of boys. Are boys parents telling their sons how to not become rapists and how to not let their friends become rapists the same way that girl parents have to teach them how to try to not get raped and look out for their friends, too?
This is such a fucked up question to ask, but I am genuinely curious. I would assume that with your professional experience you might actually have a valid perspective to offer. 

AmberLiz99

@almostpriceless I actually think it's equally important to talk to boys about it. I think that teaching girls to dress appropriately is important, but this kind of thinking can quickly turn into victim blaming (which I could get very worked up about, but I won't here). An inappropriate outfit never caused a sexual assault, is was the choice of the person who did it. I think boys and girls need to be talked to about their own body, and other peoples, and how to treat and respect both aspects of it. 

Lyette1206

I agree with the bikinis on babies - mostly for skin exposure (we are a very fair family, and DD burns so easily!), and I don't understand putting her in a clothing item that is meant for breasts when she doesn't have breasts. However, it gets tricky when kids (and in this case the discussion typically focuses on girls) get older. I personally think a woman should be able to dress however she feels comfortable/appropriate. And we shouldn't judge or shame her just because we don't agree. And I feel like teaching our young girls that their body is shameful and sexual and it is their responsibility to cover up so men/boys don't "get the wrong idea" is so dangerous and damaging. Unfortunately I also work in a field where I see every day just how often women are victimized by men, so I appreciate that this isn't so easy. I just hope the conversation changes with young men/boys soon, and people start focusing on their behaviors and what is/is not appropriate. 

lm45678

My (probably very) UO: I think children who can ask to be breastfed are too old to breastfeed.

I don't mean to offend or mommy shame- I just can't help but think it's weird and slightly inappropriate when 3,4&5 year olds are still breastfeeding.

Rosehip15

AmberLiz99 said:

I think it's silly to have your husband come to every prenatal appointment with you (unless you're high risk). What's the point of both of you having to take off work? 

I get the big ones, but every time is pointless to me. 

The point is you've got an insane Italian husband who thinks you need to be chaperoned b/c your OB is a man.  Once I switched to a woman for scheduling reasons, he stopped coming every time.  Sigh. 

Oh wait, this doesn't apply to everyone? 

almostpriceless

@AmberLiz99 it is totally great to know that there are not moms out there who aren't scared to have these conversations with their sons. I am assuming that it's no less awkward or frightening for them, but I just wasn't sure if it was happening at all. 

@Lyette1206 I don't think that @June2016BabyW or I were trying to suggest that an outfit is ever to blame for anyone's sexual behavior. Our topics just sort of overlapped. I'm not in to slut shaming, or teaching girls that they need to keep their body covered to be safe. Clothing doesn't prove anything about a person, but it doesn't change the fact that there are some things that are not age appropriate. My kid is 5'8" and well on her way to being built like a Victoria's Secret model at only 15 years old. She's stunningly beautiful and has grown men oogle her when she's in church clothes. The problem with "revealing clothing" isn't about her looking like a skank, it's about her looking 22.

mar101483

June2016BabyW said:

I don't like little girls in bikinis. Babies, toddlers, young children, adolescents, and I'm actually torn on whether or not they are appropriate for teens (16-18) And it seems like a slippery slope-you dress the kid in a bikini while they are young and you either let them continue wearing bikinis or you eventually have to explain that some people are pedophiles and will sexualize their young bodies and since they are developing they have to cover up. Tankinis are awesome or just go full one piece. And I'm a HUGE fan of those surfer girl shirts with the sleeves. Cover the sensitive skin up from the sun!!

Edit for words

I  completely agree! I've had this convo with my Bff. Her 2 yr old wore a bathing suit,l but her SIL puts her LO who is 3 or 4, in a bikini. It's not even cute and sadly we live in a world where Pedophiles exist. I remember when I was 10 or so, swimming in my pool, in my bikini, my creepo neighbor stood by my pool and preceded to say "I wanted to see how good you look in your bikini"! Total creep! Not my kid

almostpriceless

laurenm2123 said:

My (probably very) UO: I think children who can ask to be breastfed are too old to breastfeed.

I don't mean to offend or mommy shame- I just can't help but think it's weird and slightly inappropriate when 3,4&5 year old are still breastfeeding.

This is really only strange in the civilized world. There are many cultures around the world where this is what boobs are for. The society that we live in decided they were sexual at some point, which is what makes it inappropriate. What's really inappropriate is boobs being seen as sex objects.

RNMegan0711

almostpriceless said:

laurenm2123 said:

My (probably very) UO: I think children who can ask to be breastfed are too old to breastfeed.

I don't mean to offend or mommy shame- I just can't help but think it's weird and slightly inappropriate when 3,4&5 year old are still breastfeeding.

This is really only strange in the civilized world. There are many cultures around the world where this is what boobs are for. The society that we live in decided they were sexual at some point, which is what makes it inappropriate. What's really inappropriate is boobs being seen as sex objects.

I "loved" Lauren's comment (stupid mobile app won't let me tag appropriately) originally because I do see her point and agree with it... But then I read your comment and that completely makes sense too! You're right, it probably is no where near as strange in other underdeveloped countries. 

lm45678

RNMegan0711 said:

almostpriceless said:

laurenm2123 said:

My (probably very) UO: I think children who can ask to be breastfed are too old to breastfeed.

I don't mean to offend or mommy shame- I just can't help but think it's weird and slightly inappropriate when 3,4&5 year old are still breastfeeding.

This is really only strange in the civilized world. There are many cultures around the world where this is what boobs are for. The society that we live in decided they were sexual at some point, which is what makes it inappropriate. What's really inappropriate is boobs being seen as sex objects.

I "loved" Lauren's comment (stupid mobile app won't let me tag appropriately) originally because I do see her point and agree with it... But then I read your comment and that completely makes sense too! You're right, it probably is no where near as strange in other underdeveloped countries. 

I agree- and in an area that is underdeveloped breastfeeding is very beneficial.

However, I've seen my 4 year old niece eat salmon and fried calamari so I don't think she needs to be breastfeeding.

purplefan1

@almostpriceless I think the conversation has to be had with both sexes. How do you respect yourself, how do you respect others, how do you show a partner, a friend, a peer respect, etc. I'm horrified when I have kids read me some of the text messages they have sent to each other. So much slut shaming from girl to girl, so much "hoe, c*nt, bitch" etc. And I just had a teen tell me yesterday that it is expected that you put out to your prom date. They even processed it and said "but what of you just wanted to be friends with them or what if you only said yes because you didn't want to be rude but you have no interest in them?" And I've had makes who are being pressured in to sex with their girlfriend who refuse to get on BC because "it will make me fat" but don't want the boy to wear a condom because "it doesn't feel right." I have to work with these guys to respect the girls decision not to be on medication but to learn to voice for themselves that their decisions and rights have to be respected as well. No condom, no sex. And for the girls, quit slut shaming each other!!! If your boyfriend cheats, don't tell the other girl you are going to "beat her skank ass" instead, tell your crappy boyfriend he is a low life and bye. 

Clothing apparal has nothing to do with victim blaming. I would NEVER blame someone for what happened to them based on where they were, what they wore, who they were with, etc. But I do think our current culture is highly sexualized between clothing choices available, the shows on television, and social media. I find society is encouraging children and teens to grow up too fast in some ways but teaching them little to no skills to actually be mature adults. So I see 12 year olds acting like they are 17 and those 17 year olds then act like they are 12.

alileecam

Re: the breastfeeding debate...
I think it's cool to breastfeed however long you and your kid decide. However, I had a friend describe how a colleague in a meeting brought her 2.5 year old daughter and breastfed her the whole time. I think that's extreme. The kid probably wanted Goldfish instead of boob juice, and I cannot imagine flopping out my boob at a business meeting in front of my coworkers (even though many strangers have seen it in other contexts!). A preschooler who eats 3+ solid meals a day just like an adult probably wouldn't have missed it during that 1.5-hour stretch of time. I just think that in this instance it was totally unnecessary. At home at night or in the morning? Do whatever the eff works for you. But I have to question the usefulness of it when the kid is that old and within the business meeting context. 

BabyboyS2016

AmberLiz99 said:

I think it's silly to have your husband come to every prenatal appointment with you (unless you're high risk). What's the point of both of you having to take off work? 

I get the big ones, but every time is pointless to me. 

My husband would completely disagree with this, even before I was labeled high risk. Our son was never supposed to be, according to 3 fertility specialists. The positive pregnancy test came out of absolutely nowhere, we were making no changes that we hadn't done over the last 6 years. Even though all I do is provide a urine specimen, get a blood pressure/weight check, have a Doppler done and get my belly measured, he wants to be part of everything. He wants to hear the heartbeat, he wants to know his wife is healthy, he wants to build rapport with the physician who is birthing his unexpected miracle son. Trust me, I know where you're coming from. It may seem silly, especially when every appointment has to be after 3pm so he can attend without taking time off, or if this is your second/third/fourth child. But I cannot imagine going through any point of this journey without him, especially since you can receive unexpected news at any point in this pregnancy. All I'm saying is that there may be a reason why a husband insists on being present for his child before he's even born. 

lm45678

shannonrnbsn said:

AmberLiz99 said:

I think it's silly to have your husband come to every prenatal appointment with you (unless you're high risk). What's the point of both of you having to take off work? 

I get the big ones, but every time is pointless to me. 

My husband would completely disagree with this, even before I was labeled high risk. Our son was never supposed to be, according to 3 fertility specialists. The positive pregnancy test came out of absolutely nowhere, we were making no changes that we hadn't done over the last 6 years. Even though all I do is provide a urine specimen, get a blood pressure/weight check, have a Doppler done and get my belly measured, he wants to be part of everything. He wants to hear the heartbeat, he wants to know his wife is healthy, he wants to build rapport with the physician who is birthing his unexpected miracle son. Trust me, I know where you're coming from. It may seem silly, especially when every appointment has to be after 3pm so he can attend without taking time off, or if this is your second/third/fourth child. But I cannot imagine going through any point of this journey without him, especially since you can receive unexpected news at any point in this pregnancy. All I'm saying is that there may be a reason why a husband insists on being present for his child before he's even born. 

Can I have your husband?!?!

AmberLiz99

shannonrnbsn said:

AmberLiz99 said:

I think it's silly to have your husband come to every prenatal appointment with you (unless you're high risk). What's the point of both of you having to take off work? 

I get the big ones, but every time is pointless to me. 

My husband would completely disagree with this, even before I was labeled high risk. Our son was never supposed to be, according to 3 fertility specialists. The positive pregnancy test came out of absolutely nowhere, we were making no changes that we hadn't done over the last 6 years. Even though all I do is provide a urine specimen, get a blood pressure/weight check, have a Doppler done and get my belly measured, he wants to be part of everything. He wants to hear the heartbeat, he wants to know his wife is healthy, he wants to build rapport with the physician who is birthing his unexpected miracle son. Trust me, I know where you're coming from. It may seem silly, especially when every appointment has to be after 3pm so he can attend without taking time off, or if this is your second/third/fourth child. But I cannot imagine going through any point of this journey without him, especially since you can receive unexpected news at any point in this pregnancy. All I'm saying is that there may be a reason why a husband insists on being present for his child before he's even born. 

That's what makes my opinion unpopular.
It is Thursday right?

BabyboyS2016

AmberLiz99 said:

shannonrnbsn said:

AmberLiz99 said:

I think it's silly to have your husband come to every prenatal appointment with you (unless you're high risk). What's the point of both of you having to take off work? 

I get the big ones, but every time is pointless to me. 

My husband would completely disagree with this, even before I was labeled high risk. Our son was never supposed to be, according to 3 fertility specialists. The positive pregnancy test came out of absolutely nowhere, we were making no changes that we hadn't done over the last 6 years. Even though all I do is provide a urine specimen, get a blood pressure/weight check, have a Doppler done and get my belly measured, he wants to be part of everything. He wants to hear the heartbeat, he wants to know his wife is healthy, he wants to build rapport with the physician who is birthing his unexpected miracle son. Trust me, I know where you're coming from. It may seem silly, especially when every appointment has to be after 3pm so he can attend without taking time off, or if this is your second/third/fourth child. But I cannot imagine going through any point of this journey without him, especially since you can receive unexpected news at any point in this pregnancy. All I'm saying is that there may be a reason why a husband insists on being present for his child before he's even born. 

That's what makes my opinion unpopular.
It is Thursday right?

It sure is I was offering the other side too. 

alileecam

shannonrnbsn said:

AmberLiz99 said:

I think it's silly to have your husband come to every prenatal appointment with you (unless you're high risk). What's the point of both of you having to take off work? 

I get the big ones, but every time is pointless to me. 

My husband would completely disagree with this, even before I was labeled high risk. Our son was never supposed to be, according to 3 fertility specialists. The positive pregnancy test came out of absolutely nowhere, we were making no changes that we hadn't done over the last 6 years. Even though all I do is provide a urine specimen, get a blood pressure/weight check, have a Doppler done and get my belly measured, he wants to be part of everything. He wants to hear the heartbeat, he wants to know his wife is healthy, he wants to build rapport with the physician who is birthing his unexpected miracle son. Trust me, I know where you're coming from. It may seem silly, especially when every appointment has to be after 3pm so he can attend without taking time off, or if this is your second/third/fourth child. But I cannot imagine going through any point of this journey without him, especially since you can receive unexpected news at any point in this pregnancy. All I'm saying is that there may be a reason why a husband insists on being present for his child before he's even born. 

I was firmly in the silly camp before, but I get it now. I am high risk and I have a million appointments and my husband has been to one (he went to two for DS1). I go to the doc and everyone else has their husband there and I just thought it was annoying because they always take the good seats in the waiting room, ha. But I get that some husbands really want to be super involved for various reasons. I think my husband's participation level echoes a larger dynamic in our relationship--we are partners, but we don't share everything. There are some married couples who do (or do sometimes because of reasons like @shannonrnbsn outlined)--because that's what works for them. What works for me and DH at the moment is just me going to all my appointments and then communicating with him what he needs/wants to know. 

alileecam

laurenm2123 said:

shannonrnbsn said:

AmberLiz99 said:

I think it's silly to have your husband come to every prenatal appointment with you (unless you're high risk). What's the point of both of you having to take off work? 

I get the big ones, but every time is pointless to me. 

My husband would completely disagree with this, even before I was labeled high risk. Our son was never supposed to be, according to 3 fertility specialists. The positive pregnancy test came out of absolutely nowhere, we were making no changes that we hadn't done over the last 6 years. Even though all I do is provide a urine specimen, get a blood pressure/weight check, have a Doppler done and get my belly measured, he wants to be part of everything. He wants to hear the heartbeat, he wants to know his wife is healthy, he wants to build rapport with the physician who is birthing his unexpected miracle son. Trust me, I know where you're coming from. It may seem silly, especially when every appointment has to be after 3pm so he can attend without taking time off, or if this is your second/third/fourth child. But I cannot imagine going through any point of this journey without him, especially since you can receive unexpected news at any point in this pregnancy. All I'm saying is that there may be a reason why a husband insists on being present for his child before he's even born. 

Can I have your husband?!?!

Lol, I would offer to trade mine for @shannonrnbsn 's super supporting/involved one, but after my WTH post the other day, I am sure no one wants the pants-shitter.

xc1148

shannonrnbsn said:

AmberLiz99 said:

I think it's silly to have your husband come to every prenatal appointment with you (unless you're high risk). What's the point of both of you having to take off work? 

I get the big ones, but every time is pointless to me. 

My husband would completely disagree with this, even before I was labeled high risk. Our son was never supposed to be, according to 3 fertility specialists. The positive pregnancy test came out of absolutely nowhere, we were making no changes that we hadn't done over the last 6 years. Even though all I do is provide a urine specimen, get a blood pressure/weight check, have a Doppler done and get my belly measured, he wants to be part of everything. He wants to hear the heartbeat, he wants to know his wife is healthy, he wants to build rapport with the physician who is birthing his unexpected miracle son. Trust me, I know where you're coming from. It may seem silly, especially when every appointment has to be after 3pm so he can attend without taking time off, or if this is your second/third/fourth child. But I cannot imagine going through any point of this journey without him, especially since you can receive unexpected news at any point in this pregnancy. All I'm saying is that there may be a reason why a husband insists on being present for his child before he's even born. 

Ha! Sounds like my husband. After going through IVF he is soooooooooooo excited. And he is a total science nerd so any extra teeny bit of information is thrilling to him.

Yesterday when I made my appointment there was this dad there planning his whole week around the appointment, it was adorable. He said "well if it's thursday at 11, I can take the afternoon off, since I don't work fridays, 3 day weekend! Yes!!"

AshleyBKeen

There is an article posted on about six of my friend's facebook pages today about how HARD Mom-life in your 30s is.

... almost all of them are Stay at Homes.

Not to Mommy War, but my level of sympathy for their plight is so, so small right now.

almostpriceless

@June2016BabyW your job sounds heartbreaking. I'm as glad that there are people able to do what you do as I am angry and sad that it's necessary. 

Also, this is totally FFFC, but I had no idea that it wouldn't be "normal". My husband comes to almost every appointment. However, we are both fortunate enough to have jobs where there really isn't a schedule. We usually have a nice lunch and it ends up being like a date. 

Bear14+

AshleyBKeen said:

There is an article posted on about six of my friend's facebook pages today about how HARD Mom-life in your 30s is.

... almost all of them are Stay at Homes.

Not to Mommy War, but my level of sympathy for their plight is so, so small right now.

You must think being a SAHM is easier. That's pretty funny to me. 

RNMegan0711

laurenm2123 said:

RNMegan0711 said:

almostpriceless said:

laurenm2123 said:

My (probably very) UO: I think children who can ask to be breastfed are too old to breastfeed.

I don't mean to offend or mommy shame- I just can't help but think it's weird and slightly inappropriate when 3,4&5 year old are still breastfeeding.

This is really only strange in the civilized world. There are many cultures around the world where this is what boobs are for. The society that we live in decided they were sexual at some point, which is what makes it inappropriate. What's really inappropriate is boobs being seen as sex objects.

I "loved" Lauren's comment (stupid mobile app won't let me tag appropriately) originally because I do see her point and agree with it... But then I read your comment and that completely makes sense too! You're right, it probably is no where near as strange in other underdeveloped countries. 

I agree- and in an area that is underdeveloped breastfeeding is very beneficial.

However, I've seen my 4 year old niece eat salmon and fried calamari so I don't think she needs to be breastfeeding.

Lolol

AmberLiz99

Bear14+ said:

AshleyBKeen said:

There is an article posted on about six of my friend's facebook pages today about how HARD Mom-life in your 30s is.

... almost all of them are Stay at Homes.

Not to Mommy War, but my level of sympathy for their plight is so, so small right now.

You must think being a SAHM is easier. That's pretty funny to me. 

This. And I've done both. One is not easier than the other 

CourtJack

Wow - I'm excited because this is the first UO thread in ages (possibly ever) where almost every post is a legit UO.

I disagree with so many people! lol

Here's what I disagree with and why ( and thanks for having UOs people!)

1. Baby girls in bikinis are adorable and this is not the problem with our culture and over-sexualization. However, I do agree that proper UV protection is much more important and necessary. DD wears a bikini every so often b/c she looks so stinkin' cute with her little Buddha belly sticking out of it. But, when we're at a beach she is wearing appropriate swim wear to keep her safe.

2. Breastfeeding is fine wherever, whenever, at whatever age. I bf'ed my daughter until she was 2 - she could talk, she asked for 'boob'. Would I bf my daughter during a board meeting? Probably not - but I'd never side eye someone who did. In my opinion, we, as women, can't selectively support other women in their (healthy) choices because of our own discomfort. Women judging other women for making a choice to breastfeed beyond what they think is an acceptable time period makes me sad and IS what's wrong with our culture and over-sexualization. Boobs made milk before they made porn.

3. SAHMs are f'ing superheros. You can't say "not to mommy war" and then engage in exactly that.

splsmama2016

My H comes to every appointment that he can. He's missed only 2 because he had early work meetings. So I totally agree that if a husband wants to come to the appointments, no matter how short or pointless, he should come. 

I also disagree that a SAHM is not as bad ass as a working mom. This is our first child, and financially, it doesn't make sense for me to go back to work once she's born. Plus, H wants me to do what makes me happy. If that means keeping house, I'll do it. My sister was in school when my niece was little and it was hard for her. She wasn't working because she was in school all day, and she was pregnant with my nephew. Once he was born and she had graduated, she's now a SAHM who essentially works from home (newborn photographer, graphic designer/computer programming freelancer). Just because she doesn't have a set 9-5 job doesn't mean she has it easy. Now, the SAHM's who have like, 6 nannies, a personal chef, butler/assistant, driver etc... THOSE ladies aren't super mom, in my opinion.

almostpriceless

I'm with @AmberLiz99. I've been working mom and SAHM anthey are both hard in their own right. There was a point when I truly believed that staying home was easier. Then my BFF quit working for baby #2 where I only had one kid when I was at home. I can attest to the fact that we are often suffering in our own equal kind of hell, depending on the day's events. 

DeePaddy24

I've never been a SAHM (though who knows what my future holds), but I have massive respect for what they do every day. @CourtJack is right...they are superhero's!! 

purplefan1

I can attest to the fact that we are often suffering in our own equal kind of hell, depending on the day's events. 

I loved this last line for some reason.

My sister is a SAHM and she is a badass. Because honestly, no SAHM actually gets to just stay at home. Homie is running EVERY WHERE AT ALL TIMES. There is no rest. There are no quiet bathroom times, lunch breaks, pensive thoughts, etc. Working moms don't necessarily have it easier or better. When you work you worry about missing out, balance, sacrifice, etc. Any mom is super mom to me if they love their children, care for their families, and work every day at whatever job they call theirs. Whether working or staying at home, that shit takes balance, patience, perseverance, and possibly an awful lot of wine.

crdo

Bear14+ said:

AshleyBKeen said:

There is an article posted on about six of my friend's facebook pages today about how HARD Mom-life in your 30s is.

... almost all of them are Stay at Homes.

Not to Mommy War, but my level of sympathy for their plight is so, so small right now.

You must think being a SAHM is easier. That's pretty funny to me. 

Oh come on, @AshleyBKeen. WTF do you think SAHMs do all day? Oh yeah, everything. What about that sounds easy to you?

Goocran17

My UO is probably going to catch a lot of heat. Everyone in my area is up in arms about Target and their stand on the bathroom issue. Do I agree with it? Nope, not one bit. But that's my opinion. Everyone is welcome to theirs. Am I going to boycott Target? HECK NO, I'd die without it!

I firmly believe we can all get along whether we share the same opinions or not. I'm very conservative, and those who are more liberal may think I'm a backwoods hick based on my opinions, and that's their right. But we all should realize no one is ever going to agree 100% on everything, and just learn to get along. If you don't wanna go to Target, fine, don't go. But don't yell at me because I refuse to stop going! I thought it was stupid for liberals to boycott Chick fil A and Hobby Lobby just because of their beliefs. It's a business people, get over it. I don't shop there for the atmosphere in the bathroom. I shop there because of the cute clothes, home décor, and my severe cartwheel addiction.

Target, if you ever see this post, I'll never let go!

WinniethePoohsPants

CourtJack said:

Wow - I'm excited because this is the first UO thread in ages (possibly ever) where almost every post is a legit UO.

I disagree with so many people! lol

Here's what I disagree with and why ( and thanks for having UOs people!)

1. Baby girls in bikinis are adorable and this is not the problem with our culture and over-sexualization. However, I do agree that proper UV protection is much more important and necessary. DD wears a bikini every so often b/c she looks so stinkin' cute with her little Buddha belly sticking out of it. But, when we're at a beach she is wearing appropriate swim wear to keep her safe.

2. Breastfeeding is fine wherever, whenever, at whatever age. I bf'ed my daughter until she was 2 - she could talk, she asked for 'boob'. Would I bf my daughter during a board meeting? Probably not - but I'd never side eye someone who did. In my opinion, we, as women, can't selectively support other women in their (healthy) choices because of our own discomfort. Women judging other women for making a choice to breastfeed beyond what they think is an acceptable time period makes me sad and IS what's wrong with our culture and over-sexualization. Boobs made milk before they made porn.

3. SAHMs are f'ing superheros. You can't say "not to mommy war" and then engage in exactly that.

ALLLLL of this, everything.