STMs: Mixing BF and Pumping

kwilliams3402

For the second+ time moms out there that mixed breastfeeding and pumping, when did you start pumping?  FTM, and I've googled and gotten mixed answers.  I'd like to start offering a bottle a day to baby around 2 weeks, and slowly transition to all pumping (assuming it works) and bottles by the end of 3 months before I go back to work.  Slowly as in start with 1 bottle a day at 2 weeks, and add another bottle a day every 2 weeks or so until we're at all pumped bottles.  TBH, I'm frankly not sure I can go more than a couple weeks of not sleeping more than 2 hours at a time and it'd be really nice for husband and others to be able to do some of the feeding! I've registered for a bunch of different bottle types so we can try various kinds and just see what works and go with those.  I'm thinking I'll rent a hospital grade-pump, at least for the first couple months so I can see if that works.  I realize this is all wishful thinking and that reality will drive whether we BF, pump, or do formula, but it can't hurt to think ahead.  Baby being well-fed is my top priority!

So, for those with experience, when did you start pumping and how did you do the transitioning?

bananers

I started pumping around 3 or 4 weeks, once a day, to build up a stash, and around 4 weeks we started giving him a bottle a few times per week, just to get him used to it before I went back to work. 

I wanted to point out, though, that exclusively pumping is really, really hard. Most women don't EP because they choose to, but because baby prefers a bottle or has an issue that prevents them from latching correctly. Not only do you have to prepapre and clean bottles just like FF moms, but you also have to clean pump parts, AND you're still a slave to a schedule, just like you would be if you were BFing. Every time baby eats, you also need to pump, including MOTN. Breastfeeding is supply and demand, and if you don't nurse or pump enough, your supply adjusts accordingly. 

That said, there's nothing wrong with formula if you decide to go that route. But a lot of new moms seem to think EPing is the best of both worlds, when in fact, it's probably the hardest of the options available. 

icyshimmerpowder

I started pumping the first week so my DH and mom could give bottles. I mostly nursed until going back to work, and then pumped 3x/day at work and nursed at home. We were lucky in that she never had a problem going back and forth. 

Are you thinking you wouldn't nurse at all once you're back at work?

kwilliams3402

This is helpful ladies!

I'm thinking once I go back to work I could realistically nurse for feedings before 8 am and after 5:30 pm, but would rather not be the only one that can feed baby in the middle of the night if baby is still needing multiple MOTN feedings every night.

And I totally have no objections to formula, at all, but husband would really like me to try breastfeeding.  So, I'm going to try, but (1) baby adequately eating is most important, and I'm willing to see lactation consultants, etc., but I won't be stubborn about turning to formula if needed, and (2) I just can't picture EBF for long on many levels.  So we've compromised on giving BF a real try, but transitioning to mostly pumping by 3 months.

mmclark10

I second @bananers, EP would be incredibly difficult.  My BFF had to EP for her premature baby after nursing for 18 mos with her first and she said it was the hardest thing she had ever done.  For one thing, you don't know what kind of supply you will have with BF and pumping is not as effective as a baby nursing so whatever you are getting from pumping is likely less than what the baby can get on his/her own.  The schedule is grueling and she was still getting up to pump during the night for almost the entire 14 months that she EP. Hugely impressed by her dedication.

To answer your original question though, I started pumping around 3-4 weeks because my DS was really only nursing one side at a time. (Lucky for me, abundant milk supply!) He took his first bottle from dad at about 3 weeks while we went to an infant CPR class and did great with it.   When I went back to work, I pumped twice a day at work and nursed mornings, evenings and all weekends.  By the time I stopped pumping just before he turned 1 yr old, I was doing everything I could to avoid pumping outside of work.  Pumping is a lot of work and nursing becomes so very easy and convenient (for most mamas) once you get past the first couple weeks/months.

It's so hard to have an expectation about what you will do regarding BF and pumping until your baby arrives.  DS also took to BF from the very first time like a champ and we never had any issues with latching (again, very lucky mama!).  It sounds like you have the right priorities of making sure baby is healthy with however you choose to provide nourishment, but give yourself and baby some time to work through BF before you decide to switch to pumping or even have a schedule mapped out.  BF was an amazing experience for me with DS, even with waking up at night and those days/weeks of cluster feeding that seem like they will never end, and I can only hope that I'm able to have a similar experience with this baby. I hope you are able to find a rhythm that works for you and your baby!

pelorunningmama

I started pumping after feedings probably during the second week. I would let her nurse then while she nursed the second boob, I would pump to get a bit more out of the one she had just nursed. It was a pain in the butt, but it helped me build supply and also have a freezer stash/bottles for husband to feed her. I did that for a little while and then once my milk supply was really solid and she slept a bit longer, I would pump after the first feed in the morning. I was always most full then so had lots left to pump. 

Fremdschamen

I was very unsure about breastfeeding before I became a mom.  My mother was never able to successfully breastfeed, so I was prepared for the possibility that I might encounter similar issues.  I was also unsure about my comfort level with nursing in front of strangers or in public.  Once my daughter was here, I just kept trying and it thankfully worked for me, but not without a pretty hefty serving of commitment and stubbornness on my side.  I also found that my whole concern about nursing in front of others just flew right out the window!  I was proud and grateful that my body was able to nourish another human being all on its own!

I think I started pumping at 10 days out or so.  Just once a day at first, and then a bit more as I tried to build up a stash.  I found pumping after early morning feeds was the easiest to fit into my schedule.  I went back to work after 16 weeks and pumped 3x a day at work so that DD could have breastmilk at daycare.  My supply was not especially high, so I usually produced almost, but not quite enough to last DD through the next day while I was at work.  My DD was EBF until about 10.5 months when my stash ran out.

I completely agree with @bananers that EP is very, very hard.  BF creates an emotional bond, while EP becomes a very sterile and irritating process. Breastfeeding is incredibly convenient!  I loved being able to feed my kid wherever we happened to be.  Once we had to start using bottles, washing all those parts and the pump parts was time-consuming and annoying.  Absolutely no judgment against those who use bottles (of breastmilk or formula), but I just preferred the convenience of breastfeeding.

Bookhousegirl

I started pumping around 10 days, just to build my supply since I had a hard time producing enough milk. It was helpful for DH to be able to give an evening bottle in those first few months. I did end up supplementing with formula because my supply was so minimal, and that worked for us until DS was 6 months when I stopped nursing. I would nurse about 75% of the feedings and then give formula for the other 25%. I felt guilty about it initially, especially since I had very high expectations of myself with breastfeeding, but it ended up being the best decision for both my son and me. 

I have to agree with other posters that pumping is a PITA, and exclusive pumping is quite challenging. However, it's important to go based on what works for you and your baby. 

ginger819

I started at about the 2 week mark as well to get started and we probably gave DD her first bottle around that time, too, maybe a week later. She luckily never had an issue switching back and forth. She took even her first one like a champ. 

Honestly, I'm pretty excited I'll be with baby every day this time so I will rarely have to pump (I might still once a day or after a feed to get a small stash in case we leave baby with grandma and grandpa or have a night out). It was a serious PITA. It felt like I did dishes five times a day and I only pumped once at work and twice at home to stock up for the day, and I was lucky because I had a fast let down and could pump pretty fast. It still took over twice as much time as just breastfeeding. 

It was nice that someone else could feed her, but most of the time I just had whoever (mostly my mom who stayed on the weekends to help out) just bring her to me, I'd feed then she would take her back and put her to sleep. Those nights were amazing. I would only have to barely wake up for maybe 15-20 minutes then go right back to sleep. And my mom loved having the time to snuggle with her. It might sound nice to be able to have DH or someone do night feeds, but you have to be careful about skipping feeding or pumping as it could cause a drop in supply (daytime issues with this caused a dip in my supply).

If you do decide to ep buy lots of extra pieces. I found it a lot easier after I invested in even just a second set of everything to give me a small break from washing them after every pump. 

Also, like others have said if it doesn't work for you formula is always an option. DD has been on formula since 6 months (a combination of my supply drop and that we wanted to get pregnant again and I really didn't think I could take bfing and pumping with ms) and though I hope to go longer BFing this time the formula has worked out fine (and a lot easier) with DD. I also initially felt bad about it and it was a tough decision, but in the end it was the best decision for us and why we are expecting this baby. Also, I never have to worry about forgetting the milk at home (I've only done this once, but I'm surprised it hasn't happened more as DH is constantly grabbing stuff I forgot as we're heading out the door )

karlimonster

I was laid off when I had my son so I started pumping and trying bottles way too late (about 3 months). I think this time I will start the process about 3-4 weeks. If memory serves, I was crazy tired for the first 3 weeks so I don't want to add pumping into that. Especially since you have to wake up regardless to keep supply up. Once back to work I pumped every 2 hours (4 times), which was enough for him for a few months (until he was 6/7 months), then we threw in some formula. I was sad to be unable to produce enough and spend the money, but it was nice to be done pumping at work. 

texasmama2014

Never, could I ever, exclusively pump.  Kudos to moms who do, but I absolutely hated pumping at work and cannot imagine having to do it around the clock.  That being said...

I didn't offer a bottle until 6 weeks to help stabilize my supply and solidify her latch.  (I used a nipple shield for 6 months so honestly, it didn't effect much once we offered the bottle).  I pumped prior to 6 weeks only when I felt uncomfortable and she wasn't needing to eat just then. (I did have a slight over supply).  After the 6/8 week mark I tried to pump once per day extra to boost my supply and get a freezer stash going.  I went back to work part time at 10 weeks and pumped 3 times per day until she was 1, then slowly dropped down to 1 pump per day by 15 months, and totally stopped pumping that day.  I had built a large enough freezer stash to last until she was 18 months.

This time around I will probably pump once per day around 4 weeks or so to build up a stash.  I also plan to give my DD who will be 2 a few ounces per day (if I wean her off the boob... Jury i still out, I may try tandem nursing, so there's that.)

SkiChic626

I started pumping maybe 5 or 6 days after DD was born to help stimulate my milk to come in....didn't come in until 10 days after birth so I had to supplement during that time :-(  I pumped pretty much from then on out and DD obviously had bottles right from the start.  She went back and forth between pumping and nursing with no problem until I went back to work (around 5 mos), and then she completely rejected nursing by about 6 mos and I EP'd until my milk dried up.

I ended up with about 600 oz in my freezer and THANK GOD I did because my milk dried up around 7.5 mos, and that stash got us another 2 months or so of EBF  

This time I plan to bring my pump with me to the hospital and start there, if for no other reason than to give myself additional stimulation since I had such issues last time.

Ceventa

I started pumping about 6 weeks after DS's birth since I read that your milk supply is usually regulated by then and baby has figured out the latch. At that point, I was still home on leave, so breastfed him during the day, would do a pumping session in about twice a day, and at night would let DH do a feeding so that DS would get used to the bottle and I could take a break to shower, sleep, whatever. My main focus to pumping during this time was to build a freezer stash of milk for emergencies and to introduce DS to the bottle, but I was still mainly nursing. Fortunately, he picked it up right away and didn't seem to have any confusion between the breast and the bottle. 

When I went back to work and DS started going to daycare, I still did a combination of breastfeeding and pumping. Whenever he was with me I would nurse him directly, so at home during the evenings, during the night, and on the weekends, he nursed. During the workday, I would pump at least 3-4 times a day and DS would have his bottles of BM at school. Even if I went to visit him during the day I would refrain from nursing him because it would throw off his feeding schedule and it would throw off my pumping schedule. I knew I need to pump a certain amount everyday to supply him for the next day, so I didn't mess with it. 

Like other people said, breastfeeding is all about supply and demand. The more you nurse/pump the more milk you make. Personally, I really enjoyed the combination of pumping and feeding. I liked the time I had with him while nursing, it was a nice bonding time, plus it was honestly easier. I didn't have to take out a machine and clean it afterwards then prep the bottle. I just whipped out a boob and that was it. Breastfeeding also helps your body monitor your baby's health since your body picks up on what the baby is needing, you milk will adjust. So I wanted to nurse directly in addition to pumping to keep my milk adjusting to what he needed.

I highly recommend building up a freezer stash! I caught a stomach bug that knocked me on my butt for 3 days straight, I didn't want to eat or drink, which meant that my milk supply went to practically nothing. It took me a whole week to get it back to normal with breastfeeding and extra pumping sessions. If it wasn't for my freezer stash, I would have not been able to meet the quantities he needed. 

I'll probably do the same thing when LO arrives. 

cait5413

Great info, ladies! FTM here, due Aug 4. I go back to work August 22--just Mon and Wednesday at first. Am I crazy to plan on BF'ing and pumping? I guess it depends on when LO actually arrives (hoping for a slightly early arrival!). I was hoping to get by without formula, but maybe I'll need to prepare myself for formula days on M and W even if BFing goes well?

jmknox

I started pumping for DS around 4 weeks to start trying to build a stash while still breastfeeding.  He took the bottle great.  Once I went back to work at 6 weeks he preferred the bottle and completely refused the breast which was fairly devastating to me as I was hell bent on him getting Breastmilk as long as possible.  So I resigned myself to a  lifestyle of exclusive pumping for 13 months.   I even woke up in the middle of the night to pump and finally dropped that around 7 months and started slowly backing off and made it to 13 months when he weaned and was basically on solids and cows milk.   I am one of those people that just pull up my boot straps and does shit, even when the going gets tough.  And somehow I did that for a whole year... It was super hard, not easy at all, but I was literally on Autopilot, I JUST did it.   So much washing, membrane and part changes, the ANXIETY one gets when you are engorged and needed to pump so bad....  Lugging pump parts and coolers EVERYWHERE I went if it was going to be longer than 3-4 hrs...  So much dried breast milk in my car from pumping on the road... Others thought I was crazy but I didn't GAF because it made this working mama feel like I was trying to do what I could for my son at all times when I couldn't actually be there and for me it helped with my working mom guilt.  Never did I ever imagine it would be like that but I also didn't really go in to it with preconceived notions.   You will find too that you will do what's best for you via instinct and it will work out for the best.  I also participated in some great pumping support groups on FB that helped during the tough times (like illness, blocked ducts, etc) and they can help with creating pumping schedules to keep supply up, etc.     

My next leave I'm going to take 8-10 weeks to better establish the breast routine first but I won't hesitate to do it all over again for this LO if I have to.  The suckling at the breast stimulates milk way better than any pump.... And while some of us respond well to a pump some don't respond at all.   My best advice is to keep an open mind and don't forget a good post partum lactation consultant can be worth it early on to help trouble shoot issues.  

haboobjob

I started pumping almost immediately as we struggled to latch (seriously one of the most frustrating things I've ever experienced and made me doubt myself more than anything else as a FTM). DD didn't like my nips and no amount of nipple stimulation would interest her in trying to latch. I EP for the first 6-8 weeks (maybe?) until I got mastitis and tried the shield in hopes that it would help me remove the blockage. It worked and I relied on that until she was just over a year old. I tried weaning her off the shield but she wasn't interested. We didn't have any issues going back and forth between bottles and BF, probably because the shield basically made my boob look like an oversized bottle. 

I had a very healthy supply and had to pump every 2-3 hrs or I would become extremely engorged and start leaking everywhere. I did a lot of skin-on-skin for the first couple months while I was not BF to still create that connection and I feel that it worked for me. I still pumped throughout the first year as DD did not eat as quickly as I produced and it took my body awhile to regulate it's supply. For me, pumping is a PITA and was super painful at times but it was super nice to have all the extra breastmilk for times we were on the go or needed to pack extra for trips. 

BF is super tough and everyone's experience is different. It takes a lot of time, dedication and commitment. EP can be super difficult because it's kind of a lonely process (it was for me at least). I always kept a blanket that smelled like DD nearby while I was pumping and the skin-to-skin was key.

SkiChic626

cait5413 said:

Great info, ladies! FTM here, due Aug 4. I go back to work August 22--just Mon and Wednesday at first. Am I crazy to plan on BF'ing and pumping? I guess it depends on when LO actually arrives (hoping for a slightly early arrival!). I was hoping to get by without formula, but maybe I'll need to prepare myself for formula days on M and W even if BFing goes well?

How can you know when you're going back to work already?  What if LO is two weeks late?  Just curious....

cait5413

SkiChic626 said:

cait5413 said:

Great info, ladies! FTM here, due Aug 4. I go back to work August 22--just Mon and Wednesday at first. Am I crazy to plan on BF'ing and pumping? I guess it depends on when LO actually arrives (hoping for a slightly early arrival!). I was hoping to get by without formula, but maybe I'll need to prepare myself for formula days on M and W even if BFing goes well?

How can you know when you're going back to work already?  What if LO is two weeks late?  Just curious....

It's a new job. I'm a professor, and that's when the semester starts. Obviously, if I'm in the hospital, I won't be there, but I have no maternity leave, so....

That's why fingers are crossed that LO decides to come a little early. 

SkiChic626

cait5413 said:

SkiChic626 said:

cait5413 said:

Great info, ladies! FTM here, due Aug 4. I go back to work August 22--just Mon and Wednesday at first. Am I crazy to plan on BF'ing and pumping? I guess it depends on when LO actually arrives (hoping for a slightly early arrival!). I was hoping to get by without formula, but maybe I'll need to prepare myself for formula days on M and W even if BFing goes well?

How can you know when you're going back to work already?  What if LO is two weeks late?  Just curious....

It's a new job. I'm a professor, and that's when the semester starts. Obviously, if I'm in the hospital, I won't be there, but I have no maternity leave, so....

That's why fingers are crossed that LO decides to come a little early. 

Got ya - makes sense.  I would definitely prepare yourself to pump during those days that you'll be away from LO.  If you supplement with formula you're basically telling your body that you don't need to make milk, and it will affect your supply.  Anything, really, can effect your supply, though - for me it was my hormones - no amount of pumping or nursing made a difference.  Once I got my period, which I NEVER got before I had LO - I have anovulatory PCOS - it completely put a hault to my milk supply.  You just never know, so my recommendation would be to pump as much as you can.  Good luck!

Ceventa

cait5413 said:

SkiChic626 said:

cait5413 said:

Great info, ladies! FTM here, due Aug 4. I go back to work August 22--just Mon and Wednesday at first. Am I crazy to plan on BF'ing and pumping? I guess it depends on when LO actually arrives (hoping for a slightly early arrival!). I was hoping to get by without formula, but maybe I'll need to prepare myself for formula days on M and W even if BFing goes well?

How can you know when you're going back to work already?  What if LO is two weeks late?  Just curious....

It's a new job. I'm a professor, and that's when the semester starts. Obviously, if I'm in the hospital, I won't be there, but I have no maternity leave, so....

That's why fingers are crossed that LO decides to come a little early. 

Ugh, that stinks that you don't have the leave time you deserve, but don't worry, pumping and breastfeeding is totally doable! Eventually you fall into a routine of it and it becomes second nature when your body regulates. My biggest advise to mamas, don't stress yourself out because it's not good for you, your milk, or baby. 

Fremdschamen

Yes, agreed, pumping and BFing are totally doable.  From 4 mos to 10.5 mos, I BF'd at home and pumped when I was at work.  DD had no issues switching between bottle and breast.

cait5413

Thanks, ladies! I guess I'm just concerned that I won't be able to pump enough that early for baby to have enough to eat during the day. But we'll see how it goes! I'm going to do my best, and hopefully I inherit my mom's abilities--she BF'ed my brother and had enough supply to donate some to the hospital, and she had appendicitis 2 weeks after I was born, and when she got back from the hospital, I would only take a bottle, so she pumped the whole time with me (and hopefully pumping technology has improved a bit in 30 years!). She also had 2 c-sections, though, so hopefully I didn't inherit everything.

On the other hand, my cousin did not have enough supply, and sent herself into PPD trying to BF and pump constantly and her baby ended up back in the hospital for losing too much weight. They were all much happier with formula. So, trying to be realistic!

kwilliams3402

@cait5413 - I'm with you... I think the important thing is to be realistic.  All we can do is our best, and focus on the most important thing-baby's gotta eat and grow well!

lalalorelai

@cait5413 I'm not in the same exact situation you are, but I will have (at most) 4 weeks maternity leave. I've been nervous that it's not enough time to establish a backup supply and start pumping. Honestly, I'm just going to do the best I can and try not to be too hard on myself!! Whatever keeps your baby fed and healthy! 

ShanRum3

I started pumping when my DS was about a week old. I would pump after every time he nursed, to empty each breast and let my body know it needed to produce more milk. I was able to get enough frozen to last about the first few months while I was on Maternity leave, and after I went back to work, I was only able to pump once a day, at work. That meant that my supply dropped, but when I was at home, I exclusively nursed and pumped after nursing. I still had to start supplementing with formula around 5 months or so, but it was just 1 bottle or so a day. Whatever happens, what matters most is that your baby is getting fed!
@lalalorelai Will your dr. even release you to go back after only 4 weeks? I know my OB won't release you until your 6 week check up, and my company won't let you come back to work until they have that release form from the Dr.

cait5413

@ShanRum3 My employer knows when I am due (Aug 4) and expects me to be back on Aug 23. I'm not even sure the last time they dealt with a pregnancy, so I'm not sure they've really thought about it. If I have a c-section, recovery is very different and we might have a different plan, but otherwise, I'm pretty sure they expect me back. If I have to, I'll sit down to teach. 

ShanRum3

cait5413 said:

@ShanRum3 My employer knows when I am due (Aug 4) and expects me to be back on Aug 23. I'm not even sure the last time they dealt with a pregnancy, so I'm not sure they've really thought about it. If I have a c-section, recovery is very different and we might have a different plan, but otherwise, I'm pretty sure they expect me back. If I have to, I'll sit down to teach. 

Do they realize that is less than 3 weeks?? Did they make a mistake and maybe mean September 23rd?? I'm just blown away by that. I don't know any Dr that will clear you to go back so soon. I would seriously revisit that with your employer!  I'm praying that they made a mistake! What if you go past your due date?? What if there are complications??? So many things.....WOW!!!

lalalorelai

@ShanRum3 according to my doctor she doesn't do any "clearing" for returning to work. It's an office job, so it's not like I'll be doing heavy labor or even on my feet all day. It's going to suck but it is what it is. I personally feel lucky that I even get any paid leave (it's not a position that's covered by FMLA, so I'm literally at the mercy of my boss and I'm lucky he's very understanding so far). Some women have to go back after just a few weeks or else they risk losing their job. It sucks that that's an issue in our country still, but it is. 

Just out of curiosity, what would your doctor do if someone couldn't get 6 weeks from their job? If I were facing losing my job or couldn't financially swing more than a few weeks unpaid time and she told me she wasn't going to "clear" me to return to work, I'd probably tell my doctor to shove it. 

ShanRum3

lalalorelai said:

@ShanRum3 according to my doctor she doesn't do any "clearing" for returning to work. It's an office job, so it's not like I'll be doing heavy labor or even on my feet all day. It's going to suck but it is what it is. I personally feel lucky that I even get any paid leave (it's not a position that's covered by FMLA, so I'm literally at the mercy of my boss and I'm lucky he's very understanding so far). Some women have to go back after just a few weeks or else they risk losing their job. It sucks that that's an issue in our country still, but it is. 

Just out of curiosity, what would your doctor do if someone couldn't get 6 weeks from their job? If I were facing losing my job or couldn't financially swing more than a few weeks unpaid time and she told me she wasn't going to "clear" me to return to work, I'd probably tell my doctor to shove it. 

My company is large enough that they are required by law to offer me FMLA, which is not paid leave, but it saves my job. HR will not let anyone go back to work if they've been off for any medical reason unless they have been medically cleared to go back. I have saved up sick time and vacation time so I will be paid for the first 4-5 weeks I am off. I am also full time, so I am offered short term disability, or what they call it is extended sick pay, which will pay me I believe 50% of my wages for the remaining time I am off. My job is a strenuous job, requiring me to be on my feet and lifting all day, so maybe my company sees it a little differently than ones that aren't as physically demanding. I'm not sure.
It is the Dr.s job to make sure you are physically able to return to normal duties. If they say ok, you can go back to work, and something happens, they can be sued... it's a CYA kind of thing. My Dr.s say you should not drive for 2 weeks after having a baby due to the stress it puts on your body, and the slowing down of your reflexes from the whole ordeal. I'm sure if you were terminated due to a medical reason, and your Dr. confirms you were unable to work during that time, you could get unemployment, to say the least. I would think there could be huge legal repercussions for someone who fires you for not returning to work so son after giving birth.

kristynmac

cait5413 said:

@ShanRum3 My employer knows when I am due (Aug 4) and expects me to be back on Aug 23. I'm not even sure the last time they dealt with a pregnancy, so I'm not sure they've really thought about it. If I have a c-section, recovery is very different and we might have a different plan, but otherwise, I'm pretty sure they expect me back. If I have to, I'll sit down to teach. 

I was a college student and went back to school a week after I had my son. Was it ideal? not really, but it did work out in a pretty great way! I started pumping after every time he nursed and I had a great supply built up. I certainly wanted to spend time with him, but I could not justify setting myself back and finishing my last semester in the fall. You can do this  

Bookhousegirl

I will also only be taking 4 weeks off because I am a therapist in private practice and not only do I not get any paid leave, but I would lose clients if I took anymore time than that. I took only 3 weeks last time and it definitely sucked, but was doable. I'm only part time, which helps, but on the days I worked I made sure to set aside times to pump during the day and was as consistent about it as possible. I plan to do the same this time. I would love to have 3 months off, but it's just not in the cards for me because of what I do. 

kwilliams3402

This has been so helpful--thank you ladies!!

lalalorelai

ShanRum3 said:

lalalorelai said:

@ShanRum3 according to my doctor she doesn't do any "clearing" for returning to work. It's an office job, so it's not like I'll be doing heavy labor or even on my feet all day. It's going to suck but it is what it is. I personally feel lucky that I even get any paid leave (it's not a position that's covered by FMLA, so I'm literally at the mercy of my boss and I'm lucky he's very understanding so far). Some women have to go back after just a few weeks or else they risk losing their job. It sucks that that's an issue in our country still, but it is. 

Just out of curiosity, what would your doctor do if someone couldn't get 6 weeks from their job? If I were facing losing my job or couldn't financially swing more than a few weeks unpaid time and she told me she wasn't going to "clear" me to return to work, I'd probably tell my doctor to shove it. 

My company is large enough that they are required by law to offer me FMLA, which is not paid leave, but it saves my job. HR will not let anyone go back to work if they've been off for any medical reason unless they have been medically cleared to go back. I have saved up sick time and vacation time so I will be paid for the first 4-5 weeks I am off. I am also full time, so I am offered short term disability, or what they call it is extended sick pay, which will pay me I believe 50% of my wages for the remaining time I am off. My job is a strenuous job, requiring me to be on my feet and lifting all day, so maybe my company sees it a little differently than ones that aren't as physically demanding. I'm not sure.
It is the Dr.s job to make sure you are physically able to return to normal duties. If they say ok, you can go back to work, and something happens, they can be sued... it's a CYA kind of thing. My Dr.s say you should not drive for 2 weeks after having a baby due to the stress it puts on your body, and the slowing down of your reflexes from the whole ordeal. I'm sure if you were terminated due to a medical reason, and your Dr. confirms you were unable to work during that time, you could get unemployment, to say the least. I would think there could be huge legal repercussions for someone who fires you for not returning to work so son after giving birth.

Actually, to the bolded, unless your position is covered by FMLA or other state laws there are no legal repercussions at all. Most states are at will employment meaning the employment relationship can be terminated for literally any reason, by either party, at any time. This is subject to federal age/race/sex/disability discrimination laws, but only if those laws apply to the place of employment. 

In my case, my position is a temporary, one-year placement so it is not covered by FMLA. It is a federal government job but because it's temporary there are no regulations on maternity leave in place. In fact, I don't have any guaranteed sick leave at all. I'm completely at the mercy of my boss. He could have fired me on the spot when I told him I'm pregnant. It absolutely would have looked bad for him but it would have been legally permissible to do so. 

This is a HUGE problem in our country and I was just kind of surprised that your doctor won't even consider clearing someone before their 6-week appointment. According to this article (https://inthesetimes.com/article/18151/the-real-war-on-families) 25% of women return to work within 2 weeks of giving birth. It's a really sucky reality. 

Sorry, I know I kind of derailed this thread a bit. It is great to hear that there are women out there who were able to make pumping work even with such short maternity leaves! 

cait5413

ShanRum3 said:

cait5413 said:

@ShanRum3 My employer knows when I am due (Aug 4) and expects me to be back on Aug 23. I'm not even sure the last time they dealt with a pregnancy, so I'm not sure they've really thought about it. If I have a c-section, recovery is very different and we might have a different plan, but otherwise, I'm pretty sure they expect me back. If I have to, I'll sit down to teach. 

Do they realize that is less than 3 weeks?? Did they make a mistake and maybe mean September 23rd?? I'm just blown away by that. I don't know any Dr that will clear you to go back so soon. I would seriously revisit that with your employer!  I'm praying that they made a mistake! What if you go past your due date?? What if there are complications??? So many things.....WOW!!!

So, this is a new job. FMLA only applies after you've worked for a year, the state I'm in has no maternity laws of its own, and the company short-term disability leave doesn't kick in til you've worked there 2 years. I'm a professor, working at a college, so I only have to be in class teaching 2 days a week; otherwise, I can do a lot from home at first. I actually think I'm pretty lucky in some respects, as with a different job I might have to be back full time that early. The semester starts on August 23, and that's just the way it is. Like I said, fingers crossed for an early delivery, and if something else happens, we'll deal with it as the time comes. I may record a few lectures just in case I can't start right away. 

This is why we need different maternity/paternity leave laws in the US. We're so behind. 

charmedlifex3

The *only* work around is being fired because of a pregnancy induced disability would be illegal.

So if a doctor tells you you need more time before going back, you'll have to document medically you were unable to, because of XYZ condition, and if you were discriminated against based on a medical disability (even temporary disability) that violates the law. Most people who are fired under these circumstances don't fight it though, so in practice employers aren't being forced to hold to the letter of the law, but at least you would (likely) be able to collect unemployment from them based on wrongful termination.

No more protection than when I tore my knee out skiing... but it's good to know there is something.