Bachelorette party and traveling at seven months...

JavAnn

I accepted to be a bridesmaid before I was pregnant. The bride is aware of my pregnancy (and was aware we were planning on getting pregnant) however the bridesmaids currently do not know about the pregnancy and my husband and I don't  plan on announcing it for several more weeks. I'm currently discussing bachelorette ideas with the one bridesmaid; the ideas have very much been thrown around and one of the original plans I was completely fine with because it was only an hour and a half away, however right now the party has turned into a weekend (Fri-Sun) getaway to a location that is approximately 5-6 hours from where we live which is something the bride requested. My husband and I are both nervous about the long drive and and me being so far away from him and the in-network hospital we will be using when the time comes. Are we being overly cautious for our first time being pregnant or is this a reasonable concern? 

Jbabylove2016

At 7 months pregnant, I think it would be a reasonable concern. It's hard to judge on how you are going to feel by that point. Once you are in that third trimester, you tend get more uncomfortable, have pains that you didn't before, and are generally more tired. For me, a 5-6 hour drive would have been out of the question at 7 months. Plus, once you get there, it's a bachlorette party, so I am sure there will be a lot of activity, staying up late, etc. You may be exhausted just from the traveling alone, and the idea of being out all night might be a lot to handle. But, for some people, it would be no problem at all. I would just weigh your options, and do what is best for you, baby and hubby.

jolydan

I dont know how far along you are right now but I think the best way to approach this is wait and see. DH and I will be taking a babymoon 4h away at 7,5 months along and my OB said unless something comes up until then I shouldn't have a problem to go as long as it's before the 36th weeks. Don't make any commitment yet!

saladflambe

It's very dependent on the person... 

At 7 months, I flew to the other side of the country and did a very intense work conference for 3 days. It wasn't fun, but I did it, and I didn't experience any negative side effects (no extra swelling or anything). At 9 months pregnant, I could honestly probably still do it if I had to. I also have had no complications in my pregnancy though. Also, it was work... I was able to sit down pretty frequently. I did have to be up very very late, I got basically no sleep... but everyone was very understanding.

If I didn't HAVE to do it, I wouldn't have done it.

KaylaR628

  I am currently 7 months and, while everyone else is absolutely right in that it will be individual to you, my comfort level has shifted very drastically in the past two weeks or so so that I couldn't imagine a) going so far from my husband and hospital and b) having fun at a bachelorette party.  I have suddenly gotten so uncomfortable in the past couple of weeks: exhausted again, very achy hips, difficulty breathing, feeling very full all the time, etc.  I agree the best route would be to not commit and just see how you feel.  

Ceridwen77

I did a 9hr (one way) drive and 5 day long weekend trip at 7 months and it was fine. I even drove the entire trip (I like driving). We just planned frequent stops so I could walk around and use the bathroom. It wasn't a big deal for me and I had a great time. 

AdorkablePixie

I probably would have gone at 7 months pregnant, but I haven't had any complications and very few discomforts. I'm 8.5 months pregnant now and still feel pretty great. It depends on the person and the pregnancy. I feel like you should hold off on deciding, I don't know how far along you are but it sounds like you have time and if you decide not to go I am sure your friend will understand!

tripledaggerWed95976

Like everyone else pretty much said it will be individual to you.   For me, I had the easiest 1st and second trimester.. No morning sickness, nothing.  It often felt like I wasn't even pregnant. Yet, my third trimester has been hell on earth- nausea, a kidney stone, diarrhea, exhaustion, pains, swelling, acid reflux, constant contractions.. Etc. So you won't really know how you're going to feel.  

delujm0

I flew home for my sister's bridal shower/my baby shower at 32 weeks (short flight - just over an hour).  I really felt fine until I was about 36-37 weeks, and then I got uncomfortable.  which didn't stop me from driving 10 hours each way to my sister's wedding at 38.5 weeks either.  However, I declined to attend her bachelorette party.  I would have been 36 weeks at the time, and a weekend hanging out in a bathing suit watching other people drink, wanting to go to bed at 9pm but being unable to because of the requisite partying, would not have been my idea of a good time.  She was completely fine with me not attending.  I would have been a wet blanket anyway. ;-)

TennisCourt

I'm in a similar situation but for a birthday beach trip celebrating all of our 30th birthdays. I want so badly to go but will be just about 34 weeks. I've told them to all go and that I will just have to play it by ear. I have a dr appt a few days before we would leave and if I get the go ahead, I will just hope there is still a bed open!  Anyway, I would just make sure the bride knows that you might be playing it by ear. I can't imagine that she would have a problem with it. My concern with going isn't being away from a hospital since there will be a hospital that is in-network nearby, it's more so that if the baby does come early and needs to spend time in the NICU.  we will be 6 hours from home. 

tdart14

Wait an see. I did 5 hour each way weekend shopping trip at 35 weeks, out of the Country. I was fine with it, no problems a comfortable enough. 

Wait and see cause we're all different. 

SnarkasaurusRex

Wait and see how you feel. DH and I had planned a ski vacation and brewery tour in Colorado (6 hour flight for us) with some friends before I got pregnant. I was right at 7 months for the trip, and I didn't experience any problems from traveling. I obviously didn't ski (DH sent me for a spa day by myself instead), but I was able to be up and about and participated in pretty much everything else. I had been really worried about the trip, because I'd had a number of issues earlier on in my pregnancy (MS that lasted until 6 months, tons of spotting during 1st tri), but my OB gave me a clean bill of health and told me to make sure that I stayed hydrated and didn't sit still for too long on the plane. Heck, 4 days before DS was born I was at a music festival. First 2/3 of pregnancy were miserable for me, but the last bit I was feeling better than ever.

huskypuppy14

I"m 7 months now, and like a pp said, the last couple weeks have been much more uncomfortable. The travelling part wouldn't be the thing that bothered me, it would be sharing a bed/room with other people that want to party when you just want to sleep. I don't think there is any way I would go to a bachelorette party at this point in time, and I've had a pretty good pregnancy. 

Just remember, just because you are a bridesmaid, doesn't mean you have to attend the bachelorette party, and if the bride has a problem with it, she's not a good friend.

splsmama2016

I have the opposite situation as you. My best friends bachelorette party/wedding is after I have baby, and she knows there's no way in hell im traveling with a new born for a big bachelorette party. But I'm in her wedding, so I have to hire a baby sitter for a few hours to watch my child in my hotel room. 

whataboutscience

I'm curious how many weeks exactly you'd be. I traveled at 31-32 weeks last time I believe with my OB's blessing, but I had a healthy, uncomplicated pregnancy. If it was 34 weeks, I might be more nervous. Ask your OB about how late they allow/recommend travel. Sounds like you are still early in your pregnancy though, and there is the possibility of developing conditions such as GD, preeclampsia, etc. that may make travel more risky. If your OB allows it, I would go, but if you and DH will be really stressed about it, then you should probably pass. Everyone else involved should understand.

PhoebeJune1984

I would wait and see how I was feeling, and go from there. If I went, I would make sure that I had my own room/space, so I could crash if I was starting to get tired and didn't want to party. If it gets to the point where you don't feel like going, everyone should understand (and those that don't, even if that ends up being the bride, then they aren't thinking about whats in the best interest of you/baby and are being selfish). With my first pregnancy, I was still camping (on an air mattress....in a tent), until my 8th month, about 3.5 hours from where we lived. I had a very easy pregnancy, my OB had no medical concerns, and I just made sure we knew where the closest hospital was (we also had the carseat and our hospital bag with us). We also made sure we were camping with another couple that could gather our camping gear if we had to leave. But this pregnancy, total opposite.....and there is no way I would camp at all during this pregnancy. My husband wanted me go camping 2.5 hours away, but he understood when I said that there was no way I could. He knew that if it was going as well as my last pregnancy, that would be different. But since it has been a lot harder on me this time around, being on a air mattress is the last place I want to be. 

Do what you are comfortable with. 

ncm1919

Because of work, I plan to travel up until about 35 weeks unless something changes (I'm currently 29 weeks).  What I'm personally finding is that it is not that travel bothers me. Rather I just have so much less endurance and my feet hurt. I can't walk as far and I'm really struggling to know my limitations. So I end up pushing it too far and needing a day or two to recover.  

The other thing I would consider is do you really want to be around a bunch of drunk people for three days? I'm going to a wedding at 31 weeks and decided to do it because I rarely see my friends. I'm willing to put up with how annoying it is to be the only sober one to see them all. I'm not sure I could handle a bachelorette party at this point.