Manic Monday

VS2016

I just got out of my doctor's appointment and I weigh 192 pounds with 7 weeks to go.  Last pregnancy I ended at 192.  I really want to stay in "oneder land" but I think that is not going to happen because all baby wants is greasy burgers and ice cream!  I'm having a mini panic about it but I'm sure when lunch rolls around I will get over it. Haha!!  What are you freaking out about this morning? Pregnancy related or not

finnybooboo

So much!!
-DH and I have been battling some form of gastrointestinal virus for basically the last week. I've never had anything like this honestly. One day you feel awesome, so you eat like normal, and the next day you regret it and feel bad again. He's had it much much worse then I have. Hopefully we're on the mend!
-Because we've both been feeling sick, our house is a mess and laundry has piled up. It definitely gives me a lot of anxiety.
-It's nice to be able to take off work when you don't feel well, but parenting is a job you can never call in sick for. Especially when both parents are sick! ugh!
-I really want to get my hospital bag packed and had planned to get that done this weekend. Nope. It also just dawned on me that I have to get a bag packed for our daughter too. Not sure how that one went over my head until just now!

kbrands7

@finnyboobo I've just been keeping the diaper bag extra stocked for DS rather than packing an entirely separate bag. It simplifies things a bit.

gamommyx3

I've been in this mild state of freak out/guilt all weekend over how much STUFF my husband is doing compared to how much I'm doing.  Seriously every weekend it seems like I spent even more time on the couch and he spends even more time doing baby-prep.  I want to help but I'm soooooo tired.  Unreasonably tired.  Shit, I'm glad at least one of us is nesting.  I feel really bad for not helping more.  But my everything hurts.

dsmith211

Aquinna82 said:

I've been in this mild state of freak out/guilt all weekend over how much STUFF my husband is doing compared to how much I'm doing.  Seriously every weekend it seems like I spent even more time on the couch and he spends even more time doing baby-prep.  I want to help but I'm soooooo tired.  Unreasonably tired.  Shit, I'm glad at least one of us is nesting.  I feel really bad for not helping more.  But my everything hurts.

So much this. DH is completely busting his butt getting the nursery ready - fixing walls, painting, putting new floors in, building furniture, etc. I'm lucky if I can get the house swept and vacuumed and get some laundry done. Everything takes so much more effort now.

jumpy57

My bff went into labor yesterday afternoon! (Due date today) She called me on her way to the hospital, now I have been impatiently waiting for an update/baby pic. Waiting is the worst!!!

nerdymama15

My back is so screwed up the past few days that I ended up calling in to work today (even though I work from home). I already had a day requested off in advance for tomorrow since I have back to back doctor appts tomorrow.  I hate missing work so much, although I realize I'm only missing one unscheduled day since I asked off for tomorrow weeks ago.  My back does not like me lately.  So I'm wigging out about that.  Plus we have so much stuff to do before baby gets here that it isn't even funny. 

clw617

The hospital stay the first time around had its own set of normal stresses, I keep forgetting that this time around, I need to prep for my mom keeping DS1 (who is almost 3) while we're in the hospital with DS2! She lives out of state and doesn't babysit often so potty time, meal prep, bringing him to daycare (if she wants to), picking him up, getting around town, how to work our TV remotes <-- lol she asked about this over the phone last night. Sigh. Ultimately, I know it'll be one of those "she had kids of her own, ya know, she'll figure it out" kinda things, but I felt like such a ditz like, "... Oh yeah!" 

vinerie

I can buy all the stuff. Pack a great hospital bag. Decorate the hell out of my nursery. Sign him up for a wonderful daycare. But there is simply no way to plan for a newborn and what it going to happen to our lives. The unknown is REALLY starting to freak me out. I spent yesterday wondering if this was the right choice. I hate myself for thinking that, but sometimes it IS easier to go with what is known vs. what you don't know. Everyone tells me that as soon as I meet this little guy any doubt will be erased at once, but I'm realllllly starting to freak out that I don't know what the heck is around the next bend in life! 

rlworzalla

@aquinna82 - (It won't let me quote) but YES YES YES!  I'm in the house right now doing dishes, cleaning up a bit and DH is working his butt off thatching the lawn with a neighbor.  It makes me want to cry because I feel so guilty!  I know he's trying to be understanding because of my breathing issues, but part of me feels like he just doesn't say anything to avoid an emotional breakdown

littlebb22

I have been so distracted by my job situation lately.  I was laid off in December and have been applying for jobs ever since (I'm a librarian) but haven't even gotten an interview!  Also, I am now so pregnant that it feels silly to keep applying but I also can't bear to stop trying even though I would basically be useless at any job until the end of the summer.  So basically when I'm not worrying about whether I have enough diapers/freezer meals/ etc. I am worrying about whether I will ever get another job or if my career is over and I will have to go back to waiting tables.  Totally getting myself worked up over things I have no control over... it is awesome  

clw617

@littlebb22 I just want to send positive vibes your way! I'm a librarian too.  

gamommyx3

clw617 said:

@littlebb22 I just want to send positive vibes your way! I'm a librarian too.  

Positive vibes too!!!  It will work out eventually.  And this way you don't have new job stress on top of new baby stress...I bet you'll find something quickly at the end of the summer.

littlebb22

Aquinna82 said:

clw617 said:

@littlebb22 I just want to send positive vibes your way! I'm a librarian too.  

Positive vibes too!!!  It will work out eventually.  And this way you don't have new job stress on top of new baby stress...I bet you'll find something quickly at the end of the summer.

Thanks you guys!  It actually feels better just putting it out there- I've been trying not to have emotional diarrhea all over DH about it and letting it build up was just making me crazy.

JoMunson

Now that I'm on leave, I feel a pressure (coming from myself) that I should be a perfect housewife, but I also want to be able to rest and prepare for these last few weeks. I'm sure every type A moms with a little type B mix feel that way- the drive to be perfect with the drive to rest!

clw617

I wasn't really stressed about this until just now. But I saw on the April board a post about traveling (in the car) close to due date. Mother's Day weekend, we had planned to drive 5 hours to visit my ILs. This would be me, DH, and DS. I'll be 37 weeks. See, when I had DS, I was 41wks+4 days, so my mind just automatically assumes that 37 weeks is still super far away from delivery. But the closer it gets, I'm like, uhh.. am I an idiot? Don't answer that, I'm emotional.

I'll talk to my OB.

(mini side rant -- My ILs never come visit us. Whenever we throw dates out there for a visit to us, they're always vague and avoid-y and never commit to a visit. So I'm like, forget it, let's just go visit them, they can get some grandparent time in, and we'll call it a day. I'm telling myself I need to be mentally prepared to potentially have my baby up there which I'm not thrilled about, but it could happen. Ugh. Maybe this is a bad idea).

kbrands7

Standardized testing is screwing up our bell schedules for the next month. I'm feeling stressed about having my 4th period class for 115 minutes straight tomorrow. As it is, that is the one class I have that makes me feel like I've had life sucked out of me because they are so needy both behaviorally and academically (phrasing it nicely)...and of course, all in one big class together right after lunch. If I don't end up with some serious stress contractions tomorrow afternoon it'll be a miracle.

gamommyx3

More manic ranting.  The worst thing about Mondays is wearing a bra.  I go the whole weekend wearing a nice comfy maternity nursing bra and then come Monday I feel compelled to wear the real thing at work.  Mostly because there's a high risk of nip sighting in the maternity bra since it's unlined...and I work in a building filled with dirty old men...

wsgjmw1

I got a call this morning from a nurse saying my doc was not going to be in today and that I could see someone else or I could reschedule for next week. I am irritated because I need to get my "off work order" papers signed and get my disability paperwork turned in. I also would like to get seen because its been a month now since my last appointment. Apart of me doesn't want to see someone else when I have only seen my doc for 8 months now, but then I need to get stuff taken care of. Would you wait another week to see your doc or just bite the bullet and see someone new?

That1didntcount

@clw617 YES! Having the same freakout, I did not go early with my first either. The weekend I am 37 weeks we are planning on driving two hours for a baptism. My husband mentioned making a weekend out of it, and getting a hotel the night before and doing some fun things with our toddler, and I am like what if I go into labor?

SO emotional - and planning on talking to my OB about it as well.

js8812

wsgjmw1 said:

I got a call this morning from a nurse saying my doc was not going to be in today and that I could see someone else or I could reschedule for next week. I am irritated because I need to get my "off work order" papers signed and get my disability paperwork turned in. I also would like to get seen because its been a month now since my last appointment. Apart of me doesn't want to see someone else when I have only seen my doc for 8 months now, but then I need to get stuff taken care of. Would you wait another week to see your doc or just bite the bullet and see someone new?

Is it just a quick, routine, in and out appointment?  I would just see whoever is there.

LadySamLady

vinerie said:

I can buy all the stuff. Pack a great hospital bag. Decorate the hell out of my nursery. Sign him up for a wonderful daycare. But there is simply no way to plan for a newborn and what it going to happen to our lives. The unknown is REALLY starting to freak me out. I spent yesterday wondering if this was the right choice. I hate myself for thinking that, but sometimes it IS easier to go with what is known vs. what you don't know. Everyone tells me that as soon as I meet this little guy any doubt will be erased at once, but I'm realllllly starting to freak out that I don't know what the heck is around the next bend in life! 

I totally relate. I'm not questioning our choice so much as asking myself "Are we crazy?!" And I think the answer might be yes because a) this baby has to come out some how and b) we will be responsible for her once she is born. Sometimes I just feel like a big kid myself, how can I be someone's mother? We are ready with all of the tangible stuff and physically I am so ready not to be pregnant but emotionally we have no idea what we're in for! I know it is all worth it and I have never been more excited for anything in my life but yeah, I'm freaked out!

JoMunson

kbrands7 said:

Standardized testing is screwing up our bell schedules for the next month. I'm feeling stressed about having my 4th period class for 115 minutes straight tomorrow. As it is, that is the one class I have that makes me feel like I've had life sucked out of me because they are so needy both behaviorally and academically (phrasing it nicely)...and of course, all in one big class together right after lunch. If I don't end up with some serious stress contractions tomorrow afternoon it'll be a miracle.

Movie day(s)!

balamama

LadySamLady said:

vinerie said:

I can buy all the stuff. Pack a great hospital bag. Decorate the hell out of my nursery. Sign him up for a wonderful daycare. But there is simply no way to plan for a newborn and what it going to happen to our lives. The unknown is REALLY starting to freak me out. I spent yesterday wondering if this was the right choice. I hate myself for thinking that, but sometimes it IS easier to go with what is known vs. what you don't know. Everyone tells me that as soon as I meet this little guy any doubt will be erased at once, but I'm realllllly starting to freak out that I don't know what the heck is around the next bend in life! 

I totally relate. I'm not questioning our choice so much as asking myself "Are we crazy?!" And I think the answer might be yes because a) this baby has to come out some how and b) we will be responsible for her once she is born. Sometimes I just feel like a big kid myself, how can I be someone's mother? We are ready with all of the tangible stuff and physically I am so ready not to be pregnant but emotionally we have no idea what we're in for! I know it is all worth it and I have never been more excited for anything in my life but yeah, I'm freaked out!

I feel this exact same way and am so glad others are voicing it too. Makes me not feel so alone or guilty about these thoughts. 

LadyStardust179

@littlebb22 So sorry you are going through this! I feel your pain. I'm a librarian too. I was unemployed, then underemployed for a little over a year following a move to another city. Applying for jobs is the pits.

In other anxiety news, LO is estimated to be 6 lbs and I am only 34 weeks. I wasn't surprised since DS1 was almost 6lbs when he was born 6 weeks early. And I know the size estimates can be way off. But still, I don't want to birth a gigantic baby!

obryana6219

So I'm sitting in L & D because my BP was 148/98 at my NST today. Now they want me to stay the night for monitoring but won't tell me why. My last few BP readings have been great (123/56) so why do I need to stay? Plus I only had a sitter for my daughter during my appointment so she had to drop her off with my mom who's at work. The nurse at my OB's office told me that maybe my sitter just needed to miss school if I couldn't find someone else to watch her. Um I pretty sure this is my problem not my sitters and what an inappropriate comment to make. I almost brought my daughter with me to the hospital because I didn't want my mom to get in trouble for watching her while working. Ugh!

JennyS86

littlebb22 said:

Aquinna82 said:

clw617 said:

@littlebb22 I just want to send positive vibes your way! I'm a librarian too.  

Positive vibes too!!!  It will work out eventually.  And this way you don't have new job stress on top of new baby stress...I bet you'll find something quickly at the end of the summer.

Thanks you guys!  It actually feels better just putting it out there- I've been trying not to have emotional diarrhea all over DH about it and letting it build up was just making me crazy.

I'm sorry the job situation is so stressful!  My DH was job hunting last fall, and finally, he got an offer.  Even though he is working very hard and often stressed, it is a better stress because he has a job!  You will get there soon - I hope that you can enjoy the infant period and then find your dream job by the end of summer!

JennyS86

I'm going crazy today because apparently my insurnace doesn't cover the FFN lab test that was done on me in triage during 3 separate visits for preterm labor.  This is $655 times 3.  I'm trying to find out if it was coded incorrectly or not covered at all.  grrr

bookelf221

littlebb22 said:

I have been so distracted by my job situation lately.  I was laid off in December and have been applying for jobs ever since (I'm a librarian) but haven't even gotten an interview!  Also, I am now so pregnant that it feels silly to keep applying but I also can't bear to stop trying even though I would basically be useless at any job until the end of the summer.  So basically when I'm not worrying about whether I have enough diapers/freezer meals/ etc. I am worrying about whether I will ever get another job or if my career is over and I will have to go back to waiting tables.  Totally getting myself worked up over things I have no control over... it is awesome  

I'm sorry that's happening to you! I think there are a number of full time jobs in VA right now - vla.org has a jobline. I hate how hard it is for librarians to find jobs right now! 

Edit: Holy crap how did I not realize how many librarians are on here!?!?! We're awesome- people need to realize this and give libraries more money so we can all have jobs. 

bookelf221

My manic monday stuff is all good excitement. Found out yesterday that for the summer my brother will be living 30 minutes away instead of 4 hours away - so I get to actually see him, and he'll actually get to spend time with my hubby and his niece!!!!! Also got to talk to the doctor about the fact she's also preggers and is due not this weekend but the next- and I was a little stressed about that- but she said the most that will impact is whether my appointment the last week in April will be at the beginning of the week or the end of the week. It also will be in the afternoon instead of morning- so I'll actually have to take leave but whatever. I also finished packing our hospital bags this morning before my dr. appt with the exception of the electronic stuff. OH AND we have someone lined up to take care of our pups during the time I'm actually in labor- my hubby will run home for a few hours here and there once we're in the "recovery" phase-- and this person is our dog trainer and our friend and raises bullies so she knows how to handle our energetic pups. 

The only stress I'm really feeling is trying to make sure that I'm not taking on too much at work and that everything is done quickly so that if I go into labor early (I'm currently 35w+3d) everything is taken care of. 

amberraysofdawn

littlebb22 said:

I have been so distracted by my job situation lately.  I was laid off in December and have been applying for jobs ever since (I'm a librarian) but haven't even gotten an interview!  Also, I am now so pregnant that it feels silly to keep applying but I also can't bear to stop trying even though I would basically be useless at any job until the end of the summer.  So basically when I'm not worrying about whether I have enough diapers/freezer meals/ etc. I am worrying about whether I will ever get another job or if my career is over and I will have to go back to waiting tables.  Totally getting myself worked up over things I have no control over... it is awesome  

The problem with trying to find a job in library science is that there's usually some kind of hiring freeze because funding for libraries is always being cut (don't even get me started on this issue), and/or once people get into the field, they generally stay at the job that they're at because it's just so good. 

In case you haven't heard of it - a lot of people that I know in the library community hadn't until recently - look up INALJ (stands for I Need A Library Job) and your state. They have volunteers for each state/region who basically scour the internet once a week for library/MLIS related postings. One of them was in one of my tech classes, and if it wasn't for her I wouldn't have found the last two jobs in a row that I found. The ALA/TLA job boards have nothing on this girl.

I'm sure you'll find something somewhere, and will keep my fingers crossed for you...at least you probably won't be dealing with summer reading! 

thismakes4

We just got back in last night from our weekend trip. Our 6 1/2 hour one way trip ended up being closer to a 12 hrs there and 12 hours back.... definitely not fun at any stage of pregnancy. Anyways, DH is playing catch up from the weekend (he rarely takes a day off) and so many people in our neighborhood are dependent on him and today they are all asking for his help. One guy approaches him because the management here is getting on him for making repairs to his car and they want it gone-DH is putting it on our property. Another guy is having a septic problem that is in no way our problem and he wants DH to fight the management on it and he doesn't want to get involved. After he leaves we hear our old neighbor yelling for DH that he needs help... and so DH jumps in the car and they are going somewhere right now (probably the hospital). Poor DH.

And I'm all over here like, man I only have 1 real friend since moving up here 2 years ago, a neighbor, and I need more friends. Lol. I meet a TON of people all the time and I'm nice to most people but I don't want to be friends with them if ya'll know what I mean. I definitely believe that you end up becoming like the people you hang out with so I'm really picky when it comes to being "real" friends with someone. All of my really good friends live 10+ hours away and most of them don't even have kids yet and here I am expecting my fourth.

bookelf221

amberraysofdawn said:

littlebb22 said:

I have been so distracted by my job situation lately.  I was laid off in December and have been applying for jobs ever since (I'm a librarian) but haven't even gotten an interview!  Also, I am now so pregnant that it feels silly to keep applying but I also can't bear to stop trying even though I would basically be useless at any job until the end of the summer.  So basically when I'm not worrying about whether I have enough diapers/freezer meals/ etc. I am worrying about whether I will ever get another job or if my career is over and I will have to go back to waiting tables.  Totally getting myself worked up over things I have no control over... it is awesome  

The problem with trying to find a job in library science is that there's usually some kind of hiring freeze because funding for libraries is always being cut (don't even get me started on this issue), and/or once people get into the field, they generally stay at the job that they're at because it's just so good. 

In case you haven't heard of it - a lot of people that I know in the library community hadn't until recently - look up INALJ (stands for I Need A Library Job) and your state. They have volunteers for each state/region who basically scour the internet once a week for library/MLIS related postings. One of them was in one of my tech classes, and if it wasn't for her I wouldn't have found the last two jobs in a row that I found. The ALA/TLA job boards have nothing on this girl.

I'm sure you'll find something somewhere, and will keep my fingers crossed for you...at least you probably won't be dealing with summer reading! 

I LOVED that community- I didn't end up getting my job through them- but they gave me hope when I was searching lol. 

littlebb22

bookelf221 said:

amberraysofdawn said:

littlebb22 said:

I have been so distracted by my job situation lately.  I was laid off in December and have been applying for jobs ever since (I'm a librarian) but haven't even gotten an interview!  Also, I am now so pregnant that it feels silly to keep applying but I also can't bear to stop trying even though I would basically be useless at any job until the end of the summer.  So basically when I'm not worrying about whether I have enough diapers/freezer meals/ etc. I am worrying about whether I will ever get another job or if my career is over and I will have to go back to waiting tables.  Totally getting myself worked up over things I have no control over... it is awesome  

The problem with trying to find a job in library science is that there's usually some kind of hiring freeze because funding for libraries is always being cut (don't even get me started on this issue), and/or once people get into the field, they generally stay at the job that they're at because it's just so good. 

In case you haven't heard of it - a lot of people that I know in the library community hadn't until recently - look up INALJ (stands for I Need A Library Job) and your state. They have volunteers for each state/region who basically scour the internet once a week for library/MLIS related postings. One of them was in one of my tech classes, and if it wasn't for her I wouldn't have found the last two jobs in a row that I found. The ALA/TLA job boards have nothing on this girl.

I'm sure you'll find something somewhere, and will keep my fingers crossed for you...at least you probably won't be dealing with summer reading! 

I LOVED that community- I didn't end up getting my job through them- but they gave me hope when I was searching lol. 

This is great! Thank you guys so much for your positive feedback and help. Yay librarians!

laurenmdrn16

This is a total AW rant. It is in the form of an email to a coworker because I don't have the time/energy to type it out again.

Hi Jennifer,

I was wondering if you knew who our union rep is or what that situation is. I have a grievance that I need to file and am just so lost. I know I am leaving in a few days for maternity leave, but I can't let this go any longer. I was wondering also if other nurses in the district were having significant issues with Rita (nurse leader) or if I am the lucky one. Her treatment of me has been very unprofessional in the past month or so and has actually started to affect my health despite my best efforts to just block her out. My OB wanted me to take earlier leave because of the added stress, but I can't afford it. I'm sorry to dump this on you, but I just feel so helpless. 

Like yesterday, she starts off by emailing me that I need to get my priorities straight regarding visit notes and monthly reports. Ok, fair enough. So I start working on those and then she dumps a brand new sub for me to orient from 10am to 2pm. So I am running around, showing this woman the ropes, doing a full-on Aspen tutorial, while handling over 50 student visits spread between two buildings. And I had planned to be present for the Red Sox Opening Day activities in case of any issues, but Rita told me I could not because I needed to orient this sub. So then I had to explain to the gym teacher why the plan was changed. Then Rita said she "assessed" a Lower Bell student, but I got a call a few hours later from the teacher that the student had to be dismissed and when I asked Rita about it, she denied assessing the student. The only reason I did not haul my pregnant butt and my tag-along orientee down to the Lower Bell to personally assess the student is because Rita said she already had. So now, staff are royally pissed off with very good reason. And the language she used in the emails to me was very unprofessional and inappropriate. I did BCC Bob (her supervisor, the Director of Student Services) on my responses, but wasn't able to touch base with him directly. And this was just one day. Add to that the extremely inappropriate way she handled my request for a bereavement day, her blatant refusal to appropriately plan for staffing my office during my planned maternity leave (I told her I was pregnant before I told most of my family, FYI), the fact that she has put her name on MY work when presenting to the Health and Wellness Advisory Committee (literally copying and pasting my words and putting her name on it), and directing other nurses to go to me for documents and assistance that really should be handled by the nurse leader, especially one who has no student load of her own.

I am also very upset because I am under the impression that she is planning to use you along with piece-meal subs to fill in gaps that she created by not hiring a long-term sub to fill the maternity leave position. I can not express how difficult it has been to have no idea who was going to be finishing out the school year in my office, but looking at the other side, it is ridiculously unfair and unacceptable to your position at the high school to be pulling you at such an important time of year. If you can't tell, my blood pressure is through the roof right now and I am seeing all shades of red, which is not how I envisioned that last month of my pregnancy to be. Again, I am sorry to rant and I know it is not professional, but I don't know where to turn. She cannot continue as she has been in this position and someone needs to know how this has been so poorly handled. I don't trust myself entirely to address this on my own so I want to reach out and see if there are any avenues for help.