So our 8-year-old has been having an issue with lying about anything and everything for the past year. I mean destroying things and blaming it on the four-year-old, throwing homework away and saying he doesn't have any, breaking his teachers things, begging his classmates not to tell and STILL lying about it instead of owning up to it. He is extremely disruptive and destructive in class and at home when he THINKS he can get away with it. He will not tell you the truth even if you CATCH him in the act. And even when he is punished, he seems like he genuinely does not care at all... he says "okay, whatever" and makes comments like that, rolls his eyes, pouts, and is just all around disrespectful about it.
Recently, his lying and disruptive behavior took on a third partner: theft. In the past two months, he has stolen $130 from us, and that's just what we KNOW about, what he has been caught with at school and what we have caught him with. And yet, he lies about where it came from. After investigation and we find out he certainly stole it from us, he still lies until it boils down to "tell the truth or you're getting spanked". And we HAVE had to spank. And the truth finally comes out. But he does NOT seem to care and he just. Keeps. Doing it.
We have tried EVERYTHING... rewarding him for GOOD behavior, but that turned into him feeling entitled to rewards and treats for simply not getting in trouble or in trouble much that day, not deserving it for behaving particularly well. We have tried grounding. Doesn't phase him. Intervention with his teacher, principal, AND counselors, didn't phase him. And as mentioned, tried even spanking, does not phase him... We love him so much, but we are at our wits end. He has no remorse, no empathy, he just truly does not care unless he is getting what he wants when he wants and we don't know what to do. Anybody struggled with their child in a similar manner? What did you do or did anything at least help a little? We are terrified of him getting older and keeping these habits and growing into a person he (and others) won't like, and continuing to make poor choices and get into trouble in the future. How do we stop this NOW before it gets worse?