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Extra Activities for my almost 4 year old daughter

The background on my daughter is that her hearing was off, and she got tubes for her ears when she was 1 years and again when she was 2 years old.  Her hearing was finally cleared last year.  She has been in speech therapy since she was 1 years old. She was diagnosed on the spectrum for Autism last October.  She will be 4 years old at the end of April.  We will be getting her ears checked this Wednesday.  

We worked really hard on potty training, and she finally got it at the end of December. So I enrolled her in parent tot Gymnastics and Ballet at the beginning of January.  I ended the parent tot gymnastics at the beginning of March--it was getting too difficult to get her to follow direction, and it was exhausting for me to be on the floor with her.  With ballet, I kept her in because the teacher pretty easygoing, but we are concerned about her being a distraction to other kids and not sure what she will do in the recital.    

The one thing that I am struggling with is extra activities where the kid has to follow direction--I cannot tell if my kid is just behind compared to other kids and  following direction, or my kid is really bored and does not care, or I should just take her out of class and put her back in when I think that she will be more committed to it.  Is there any help that I can get her to follow direction better?   Are there any activities that your kids have done really well at?   

When all of this was happening, I was wondering if she would be ready for kindergarten.  She did developmental preschool and daycare this year.  Next year, we have enrolled her morning MWF preschool at daycare and then put her in a developmental preschool at local school during the afternoon T,W, Th, Fr.  
imageimageLilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Premature Baby tickers Lilypie Premature Baby tickers image BFP on 07/18/08. Miscarriage 07/30/08. BFP 3/25/09. Confirmed second miscarriage, no heartbeat, no growth beyond 7 weeks, 5/19/09. TTC again, on baby aspirin, due to value of 23 on Anticardiolipin Antibodies. BFP 11/15/09. Brown spotting, Beta 3735 11/25/09, Beta 5602 11/28/09. Anticardiolipin Antibodies now negative, still on baby asprin. On 100 mg of Prometrium (progesterone) until 10 weeks. Good heartbeat at 1st appt. 12/16/09. Started taking fish oil. Perigestational hemorrhage and red bleeding 12/17/09. 2nd Ultrasound-8 weeks, still a heartbeat 12/17/09. Baby measured 9 weeks, still a heartbeat 12/23/09. Good NT Scan on 1/8/10, heartbeat 164. EDD 7/28/10. TEAM BLUE! Aidan Thomas born on May 26, 2010. Baby #2, BFP 11/27/11, EDD 6/5/12. TEAM PINK! Noelle Elizabeth born 4/30/12. Blessing from God, Blessing from God, Blessing from God, Blessing from God.

Re: Extra Activities for my almost 4 year old daughter

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    Congrats on the potty training!! That's huge!

    Consider why it is you want her in gymnastics/dance. Is it fun or frustrating? Many typical 4 year olds would prefer free play over that kind of controlled setting. Does she even want to do it? Is the expense and frustration worth it to you? Honestly, my typical 7 year old is just getting to a point where he may be interested enough to follow directions in lessons IF it's something he chooses. In the baseball class he begged for, he spent more time doing somersaults and picking flowers than actually listening to the teacher. 

    As for what may work, it depends on your goal. If it's following directions or participating in group activities, the preschool or therapy (such as ABA) should work on that. If it's for fun/exercise, what does she enjoy? I know many kids who found their love in swimming or therapeutic horseback riding. Check for local programs geared towards kids with special needs, they may have staff and programming that's a better match for your daughter.

    Regarding your concern with being ready for kindergarten, does she already have an IEP with your school district? (I'm assuming you're in the US) The school district should provide services for kids with educationally significant disabilities from the age of 3. The IEP process will identify her areas of need and what services she needs to access education in the least restrictive environment (a general ed preschool for now and kindergarten later, ideally). Right now, that may be teaching her to follow directons in a group setting and following a classroom routine. Her teachers can work with you making sure she's ready for kindergarten. 

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    Thanks for the advice.  She started swimming when she was 1 years old and then finally passed after the 5th parent tot class when she was 3 years old.  Our local pool in Sequim, Washington, closed last October.  But it will be reopening under the YMCA this September.  I am wanting to put her back into swim lessons because she loves wearing a swimsuit and swimming.  

    She has a IEP through the developmental preschool.  We just got her ears checked out.  One of the tubes fell out and the other is in her ear in earwax.  She has had a cold in the last couple of weeks.  So they want to recheck her in one month to determine if she needs to get tubes again.  

    There was a post on Facebook that I thought was inspirational:
    https://www.facebook.com/topic/Amandas-Academy-of-Dance/107558015940611?source=wtfrt&position=9&trqid=6271423272613899817
    imageimageLilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Premature Baby tickers Lilypie Premature Baby tickers image BFP on 07/18/08. Miscarriage 07/30/08. BFP 3/25/09. Confirmed second miscarriage, no heartbeat, no growth beyond 7 weeks, 5/19/09. TTC again, on baby aspirin, due to value of 23 on Anticardiolipin Antibodies. BFP 11/15/09. Brown spotting, Beta 3735 11/25/09, Beta 5602 11/28/09. Anticardiolipin Antibodies now negative, still on baby asprin. On 100 mg of Prometrium (progesterone) until 10 weeks. Good heartbeat at 1st appt. 12/16/09. Started taking fish oil. Perigestational hemorrhage and red bleeding 12/17/09. 2nd Ultrasound-8 weeks, still a heartbeat 12/17/09. Baby measured 9 weeks, still a heartbeat 12/23/09. Good NT Scan on 1/8/10, heartbeat 164. EDD 7/28/10. TEAM BLUE! Aidan Thomas born on May 26, 2010. Baby #2, BFP 11/27/11, EDD 6/5/12. TEAM PINK! Noelle Elizabeth born 4/30/12. Blessing from God, Blessing from God, Blessing from God, Blessing from God.
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