2 kids: night and day experiences

16isourluckynumber

Just thought I'd share in case this helps anyone.  I'm waiting for an ultrasound this afternoon and having trouble concentrating on work.  

I have a 5 year old daughter and a 2.5 year old son (2 y 10 mo).  With my daughter, we started trying to potty train at 2 y 6 mo because daycare said she was ready and was waking up dry from naps.  She was also highly verbal.  So we did the whole 3-day weekend only underpants during waking hours thing.  It was a disaster.  We used bribery, didn't make a big deal out of accidents, followed all the instructions, etc.  She improved some but only from about 8-10 accidents per day to 2-4 every day.  She was OK for pooping in the potty but not peeing, which I know is opposite of many kids.  She was also always dry at nap and even bedtime.  But she kept having wet accidents for months.  She would say things to me like "Mommy, I think I'm starting to have an accident right now," and I'd be like "then run to the potty!!!"  We ended up taking her to the doctor at 3 years old and they sent us to a urologist.  The urologist said BACK OFF or you are going to create really serious issues.  So we did - she was thrilled to go back in pull ups for 6 months, until she was 3 y 7 mo.  Then one day she decided she was ready.  She was mostly ok, but she was still having all of these "partial" wet accidents -- not a full accident, but her underwear were always a little wet.  Back to the doctor.  They ran some tests, tried a medication for urgency/frequency, and also said she was constipated, so she's been on Miralax for 2 years now, which seems to help some.  It was not until she was close to 5 years old that she started to be pretty consistently OK.  Although she does still have an occasional accident (maybe once a month).  The whole process was extremely stressful on everyone.  

Enter my son at 2 y 9 mo.  He didn't seem interested, but he would say things to me that suggested he might be physically ready, like "I'm peeing!"  Haha.  We decided to give it a try but I was firmly set on backing off if it didn't take right away.  The first morning that we tried, he had several accidents, but they helped him make the connection right away.  After nap time that day, he has basically been golden.  Maybe an accident every few days, dwindling down to none by day 10-12.  It's been amazing - like angels singing.  He has even been telling us when he needs to go since day one -- something my daughter didn't do for months and months.  He gets a jelly bean when he goes (and shares one with his sister).  Dare I say the process has been fun?  

Anyway, I guess one of my points is that not every kid is ready at 2.5 years old, and no matter what other parents say, your kid might be different.  My daughter is extremely intelligent and verbal but her body just wasn't ready.  Forcing her only made all of us miserable and stressed out.  Also, if you're in the trenches, I hear you.  It can be so hard.  Try to give yourself and your kid as much time as you can.