Monday Bitchfest

TheJerilu

canavara said:

Maybe I'm crazy but I sometimes enjoy the rando drive-bys when they get all combative in response to people telling them they're breaking the TOU. Only the ones where they don't come bumbling in with an already positive test though and post photos. Those people are TWs.

@canavara I'm totally in this boat with you.  I excitedly refresh all day to watch them flail dramatically until it finally gets closed by admins.
  

meilay

@beary67 that's a great idea! I do have a sodastream but we typically use it for actual sodas for DH. Maybe it will help. 
@MrsJ2410 Thankfully I got the biggest thing done last year which was getting all 4 wisdom teeth pulled. I'm hoping to get as many of the smaller things done as I can before my insurance maxes out, starting with a deep clean. 

Mlight28

My inlaws are ridiculous. 

This may include a Trigger for some, so ****trigger warning: birth defects*****

My inlaws and their extended family at Easter were discussing a lady in their community that had twins, one has cerebral palsy. The twins are now 18. 
One of them ignorantly said "yeah, but everybody always said that the one twin has problems because the mom took fertility drugs."
I just about flipped my shit. I came very close to giving away our struggle to his whole family in what I said to her, and I may have, but I don't care. I (as calmly as I could) told her that that wasn't true, and if fertility drugs caused birth defects, they would be taken off the market. I told her that I felt bad for the poor mother if everybody thought that and blamed it on her. I told her how ridiculous that was, and how I wouldn't repeat that, and would correct anyone else I heard saying it. 

I don't know the poor mother, but I can understand part of her struggle to have to move forward with fertility treatments of any kind. She didn't chose it, and neither am I. Nobody WANTS to do any type of treatment, you just want it to happen!!!
But sweet lady, I'm in your corner. Even 18 years after your twins were born, you still have to deal with ignorance and people blaming YOU for your struggle and choices in wanting to have a baby. If I could, I would come hug you and tell you that I understand, and I'm sorry for the cruel and judgemental world we live in. 

Mlight28

Darn, I missed that the inlaw thread had been created!! I'll jump over there next time!

kiwieloping

aammyy33 said:

So this is totally a #firstworldproblem but my MBF is Netflix not working!!!!! Canada has a different set of channels than the US and for the past year we have been paying to use a proxy server to access all of the American content. Apparently Netflix has caught up with it all and have cancelled our access to the extra content as of today!!! Ugh, so much less selection now, and two shows we were in the middle of are gone!

Try changing your DNS #.  If you search YouTube there is a bunch of step-by-step videos on how to do this so Canadians can access US-Netflix.  The comments section of the videos usually have the updated DNS #'s.  Happy viewing!

redheeler

First of all, the Monday after Easter IS a public holiday here in Australia! It's great, but I still had to work (public Holiday rates though so not so bad!)

many MBF starts with being on the other side of the world and often missing all the drive by posts! 

Also my MIL has been away for the long weekend and wanted to come visit DS today, she was going to ring me before she left and I haven't heard from her yet! I have shit to do that I can't do until after you come around, because I need you to pick up something from DH at work first! Just hurry up!

***TW - loss mentioned in next paragraph!***

Then I have a friend who wanted to get coffee today, but when I told him about my loss he kind of just went "oh well next time" and started complaining about his boyfriend again, I'm just like seriously!? All I want is someone to talk to, DH hasn't been helpful because we've both just been so exhausted lately that any time we have together is usually spent catching up on sleep or chasing after DS.
I just want someone to complain to.

especially after being caught off guard by my SIL who is 16wks pregnant, I didn't expect her to be showing yet so when she turned up for dinner last night in a tight dress that really showed off her bump it kind of really hurt...

eta: forgot something!

AliciaGoose

1. It's CD1
2. I've been working since I woke up (still going)
3. I got my second formal complaint of the year from a parent (I teach an honors class, it comes with the territory, and they're taken with a grain of salt, but still always get me down) - this is the one I think truly bother me right now  
4. I have a terrible headache
5. My bump time has been severely limited to this post and a couple of other read throughs
6. Time to keep working

MelissaM090

@meilay and @beary67 I'm BRUTAL with water intake during the week. DH gets mad at me all the time because I'll get home after work fatigued and headachy and irritable and he'll be like 'how much did you drink today' and it'll be something awful like 'half a Diet Coke at lunch?'. I probably need an app. I just don't think to get up from what I'm doing to get a drink.

picklesplease

My MBF is that DH is being a whiny pile tonight. I have a nasty migraine and my back is killing me. I went to the grocery store after work and then carried all of the groceries in by myself before he got home. I asked him to put the groceries away so that I could take a shower. He acted like I asked him to shoot his cat. Then I got out of the shower, limping, and asked him to start dinner. He started stewing and acted like I was causing him physical pain. He gets so pissy when I ask him to help out. And then if I don't fawn over him, he acts like I never do anything. 

vintageandrea90

My MBF is DH. I tried to explain to him our "stats" for this cycle and was trying to explain why I temp etc. And he got all pissy and said "have you ever heard of trying too hard? Stop trying so hard and just let it happen and if it's meant to be it will happen." I'm like seriously? Seriously? So you just want to keep winging it and then wonder why we never get KU. Oh ok...sure. thanks for seeming semi interested in this process *sarcasm*

PepperAT

kiwielopingbride said:

aammyy33 said:

So this is totally a #firstworldproblem but my MBF is Netflix not working!!!!! Canada has a different set of channels than the US and for the past year we have been paying to use a proxy server to access all of the American content. Apparently Netflix has caught up with it all and have cancelled our access to the extra content as of today!!! Ugh, so much less selection now, and two shows we were in the middle of are gone!

Try changing your DNS #.  If you search YouTube there is a bunch of step-by-step videos on how to do this so Canadians can access US-Netflix.  The comments section of the videos usually have the updated DNS #'s.  Happy viewing!

 I hear you! We can't even change the DNS# They don't want us viewing the US version so they blocked it, but it has way better TV shows on it.  *sad panda*

mrsdaddario

@vintageandrea90

I mentioned this when I was first on TB, but when DH and I were around month 4 going on 5 of trying, and I was on like CD 60 or something ridiculous, I was also explaining our stats to him and he said I was too passionate about it. I almost murdered him. I totally feel your frustration. Luckily DH has gotten A LOT better but I think that's because I got the PCOS diagnosis. It was actual proof that I wasn't BSC when I kept saying something wasn't right. I ended up writing him a really scientific/this is why you hurt my feelings email after I got diagnosed and that seemed to wake him up too. Do you think your DH might respond to something like that? Getting all of your feelings out in one spot? He can read it and have time to absorb what you're saying, instead of having a face to face where everything might sound over his head and harder to comprehend. I hope he comes around!

meilay

@vintageandrea90 It seems to be a stage in the TTC process for many of us. It can take a little bit sometimes for our SO to understand or at least try and it is so hurtful and for me, it made me really lonely. I agree with @mrsdaddario. Explaining your feelings in a more neutral space may help. Honestly, I got DH to hear me out when we were snuggling one night after HIO. Though I guess how much he was actually listening is debatable. Anywho, when I explained that to not do anything and "just chill" would cause me significantly more stress and heartache, he came around and just asked that I not pressure him about FW and O days and all that. It felt like a good compromise to me. So he knows when I'm POAS but not what the results are. And he may notice that I'm extra frisky for a couple weeks but he's ok with the extra BD and uh, favors. I hope you're able to get more support from him in this process soon. 

vintageandrea90

@mrsdaddario @meilay Glad to know it's not just my DH. Thanks for your words of support...hopefully he hears me out eventually!

kiwieloping

PepperAT said:

kiwielopingbride said:

aammyy33 said:

So this is totally a #firstworldproblem but my MBF is Netflix not working!!!!! Canada has a different set of channels than the US and for the past year we have been paying to use a proxy server to access all of the American content. Apparently Netflix has caught up with it all and have cancelled our access to the extra content as of today!!! Ugh, so much less selection now, and two shows we were in the middle of are gone!

Try changing your DNS #.  If you search YouTube there is a bunch of step-by-step videos on how to do this so Canadians can access US-Netflix.  The comments section of the videos usually have the updated DNS #'s.  Happy viewing!

 I hear you! We can't even change the DNS# They don't want us viewing the US version so they blocked it, but it has way better TV shows on it.  *sad panda*

Are you sure?  I'm Canadian and this is how we access US-Netflix.  It's blocked for CDN DNS.  Anyway...not really a bump topic but I'll take any distractions during the dreaded TWW.

redheeler

Probably need a Twatwaffle Tuesday for this, because I'm feeling a bit of a twatwaffle, 

TW someone else's pregnancy + loss mentioned

my SIL is 20wks today and just found out she's having a girl, I've got to admit that after my loss a couple weeks ago I'm feeling less than thrilled, don't get me wrong I'm so happy for her and so excited about havig a niece, but she was always so adamant that she didn't want kids, would complain about DS all the time when he was around, and just generally didn't like kids (she's gotten better with DS as he's gotten older though) I just wanted a little girl so badly (don't get me wrong on that either, I would be absolutely thrilled for another boy, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't have a slight bias) I don't know, none of this probably makes much sense, but I hadn't seen her in awhile and her bump caught me off guard the other day and I've just been really depressed since, not even sure if it's the news of a girl that has me feeling like this, or just the fact that she gets to announce it and I won't get to with the baby I lost. 

guess I just need to suck it up, at least I can go buy cute pink things for someone now.

Neikoda

Aphillips95 You're fine. It totally makes sense and I would be upset if I was in your shoes too. My SIL wouldn't even test for 2 months because she was so adamant that she wasn't KU and didn't want to be. I hadn't seen her in a few months. Easter there was a big 6.5 month bump in my face. It's hard and definitely takes you off guard. And I'm sorry for your loss. I was supposed to be 2 months behind her so I understand the difficulty in watching someone else experience what you should be going through. Sending good thoughts your way.

redheeler

@nwegman7878 thanks, it makes me feel better to know that I'm not being crazy, someone else gets it. Had a good chat with DH when I got home from work tonight and he was quite upset about it too. Not that I would've known if I hadn't mentioned it... I hate how well that man can hide his emotions! I on the other hand am like the stereotypical Italian housewife when it comes to being upset, I'm so over dramatic!

Neikoda

Aphillips95 That's exactly how DH and I are too. It took me ranting and raving about the holidays yesterday for him to finally talk about how he felt overwhelmed and terrible that there wasn't more he could do to help me through this TTC journey.

ChaoticWolf

@Aphillips95 I'm so sorry you're going through this. It really sucks having to see other bumps while TTC. Creepy internet hugs sent your way. 

However I do have one thing to say and it's that sometimes people lie to cover up that they're TTC (I just haven't corrected my families assumptions about when we want kids, therefore lying by omission) or they just flat out change their mind. Your SIL actually sounds like me in some ways. I am so awkward around other people's kids it's not even funny.

Until a few months ago DH and I were adamantly TTA because we'd always been people who never pictured kids in the immediate future. Then the baby fever it, and good lord it hit us hard and fast. We both went from shuddering at toddlers' tantrums and awkwardly holding newborns, to gazing wistfully at the baby aisles in the store and watching FB for bump updates from our KU friends. Most of our families would be shocked that we even want kids, let alone want them right now. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is, you definitely have a right to be upset (and I would be too), but just consider that there might be other factors at play. 

thj101

@aphillips95 *hugs to you*  I know how that feels!  My SIL just looks at her husband and gets pregnant.  1st one was on the 1st try, and the other 2 were conceived while she was on the BCP.  3 kids by 31 for her... and I'm 29 and just starting... no pressure.

ETA last sentence

redheeler

@TotororyInLove I get that, and id
complately understand if she was trying and had changed her mind (how she's speaking now though, im still not 100% sure she knows exactly what she's getting herself in for though) it's more that because I've never seen her want kids, or interact well with kids, and I don't know if they were trying, or even trying for months, the rational side of my mind keeps telling me that it's a possibility, but the BSC/depressed side keeps saying "why her and not me"

ChaoticWolf

@Aphillips95 Oh I get that whole BSC side that whispers in my ear stuff like that too. Like when a girl I know who's younger than me decided to get married a week before me, even though I'd been engaged for three years and she for ten months, and then announces she's KU right before my TTC start date. I totally (totorory) get that. Like in a "It's not your turn stop trying to one up me" kind of way, even though she probably doesn't even think that way. 

I just also know that if I was to announce that I was KU or TTC right now, everyone I know would think I'd gone nuts because of my attitudes in the past. Everyone would also probably have CPS on speed-dial because they've never seen me as competent with kids. I just think that most people I know happen to have very ill-mannered brats with no discipline lol.