Another DH rant...

ATolentino89

Grrr. It's 8pm and DH has the radio blaring and is mad when I ask him to turn it down so DS can go to sleep. I swear he refuses to acknowledge that everything changed because we had a baby. He was mad because I asked him to empty the dishwasher. He has a light load on days he goes to school.

Then again he is making dinner b

maybe I'm just grumpy from lack of sleep. 

2winterbabies

Nothing wrong with asking for help. You're tired too. 

BethP321

Mine goes something like this: "I work all day, so I don't have to help with the baby whatsoever."  Umm..  Not that I think of my baby as a 'job' but i don't get a break (and I also work a job so he can't hold that against me anymore)!!!!  He gets to come home and relax, while I don't get a break, even when he's home.  Thank god we live with his mom or I would be pulling my hair right about now.  She at least gets to relieve me for an hour or so to shower.  We did all the work during the pregnancy, I guess it doesn't end.

celainev

LO always cries as soon as I sit down to eat. So tonight I just stared at DH until he got the hint that he is allowed to console him during dinner too... It doesn't always have to be me.... He tried to give me a "let him cry it out" speech but I shot him down.

BUT mine is a huge help around the house, so I can't complain about that... I'm sorry your husband can be crappy...  

2winterbabies

BethP321 said:

Mine goes something like this: "I work all day, so I don't have to help with the baby whatsoever."  Umm..  Not that I think of my baby as a 'job' but i don't get a break (and I also work a job so he can't hold that against me anymore)!!!!  He gets to come home and relax, while I don't get a break, even when he's home.  Thank god we live with his mom or I would be pulling my hair right about now.  She at least gets to relieve me for an hour or so to shower.  We did all the work during the pregnancy, I guess it doesn't end.

This is my DH to the point. I don't get what they are thinking. 

ammnam14

DH has his moments for sure. Last night was terrible. DD got up every two hours and I was exhausted. When she started stirring at 7 I wanted DH to get up with her. Noooo, I look over and his pillow is covering his head. I wanted to punch him in the throat! He's getting better, but come on man lol.

dec15mum

My SO doesn't even wake up during the night to look after DS. I've done the night job since he was born and a few days ago I was out with a friend alone for the first time in ages! (Even though SO works and still goes out) and I had to come home because DS was crying and he didn't know what to do despite me phoning him and telling him...
This happens when I try to bath too

mltarrio

My DH is amazing, so I feel bad even complaining, but the man has NEVER washed a bottle.... EVER. I am back at work and pumping, and she takes 3-4 bottles a day, and every night I have to come home and wash them. I don't get it. He will change a poopy diaper, he will do regular dishes, but cleaning a bottle is beyond him. 

ATolentino89

Oh man, it's bittersweet to see I'm not alone. @chaelainev every time i sit down to eat ,DS cries too! I usually always have him on my boob with a plate in my other hand or sitting next to me. The only time I get to enjoy my food is when I take leftovers to work the next day. 
He usually cooks dinner and attempts to clean up the kitchen after while I tend to DS but sometimes he can barely move (40% disabled veteran at 28 years old)  

celainev

ATolentino89 said:

Oh man, it's bittersweet to see I'm not alone. @chaelainev every time i sit down to eat ,DS cries too! I usually always have him on my boob with a plate in my other hand or sitting next to me. The only time I get to enjoy my food is when I take leftovers to work the next day. 
He usually cooks dinner and attempts to clean up the kitchen after while I tend to DS but sometimes he can barely move (40% disabled veteran at 28 years old)  

It's hard. I love cooking and get excited about the meals I make, but most of the time I have to either shovel them down, or I skip eating all together. (Which I know is bad) but I just can't eat when LO is crying.... And since he's bottle fed it takes two hands.

ssn109

Mine promised he would help more when I went back to work. Last night was the first time he got up during the night, but only because he fell asleep on the couch in the same room as the baby. So when I walked out to warm a bottle, DH said here you go, I'm going back to bed. It was 3:15, I had already been up to pump at 12:30 and was going to have to get up again at 4:30. This was after I handed the baby back to him last night so I could get myself ready for work and to do my last pump before bed, and he legit asked why he had to take the baby back. He seriously doesn't seem to care that I can only really get things done jn the evening when he's home. And we won't even talk about the complete lack of support for my efforts to keep my supply up by pumping in addition to BFing...all he does is bitch about it. He's not the one who has to hook up to the stupid machine or the one with raw nipples from pumping so damn much.

love-mom-life

DH has YET to change a diaper!!!! Ugh! He refuses. DD is 11 weeks. And it's all me. I'm a SAHM and he travels Monday-Thursday and is sometimes gone for 2-3 weeks at a time. And then when he's home, he doesn't think I need help at all. I cook, clean, shop, the list goes on. I'm so angry

ATolentino89

@xmasbaby15 that's rough! DH will at least change one diaper m-t-w and all day Saturday. But yeah, when he does help me clean or cook he does it all half assed so I have to go behind him and finish every time. 

redfallon

chaelainev said:

ATolentino89 said:

Oh man, it's bittersweet to see I'm not alone. @chaelainev every time i sit down to eat ,DS cries too! I usually always have him on my boob with a plate in my other hand or sitting next to me. The only time I get to enjoy my food is when I take leftovers to work the next day. 
He usually cooks dinner and attempts to clean up the kitchen after while I tend to DS but sometimes he can barely move (40% disabled veteran at 28 years old)  

It's hard. I love cooking and get excited about the meals I make, but most of the time I have to either shovel them down, or I skip eating all together. (Which I know is bad) but I just can't eat when LO is crying.... And since he's bottle fed it takes two hands.

<span><span class="vanilla-mention-@">@chaelainev&nbsp;</span></span>&nbsp;&nbsp; I put LO in a bouncer chair (on the couch next to me) or high chair (with a rolled up baby blanket behind his head and tucked at his sides) that is reclined to feed with a bottle. That's how I get to have a hand free!<br><br>We have this bouncer and this high chair:<br><a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="https://www.toysrus.com/buy/baby-bouncers/fisher-price-my-little-snugapuppy-deluxe-bouncer-x7313-19346216" title="Link: https://www.toysrus.com/buy/baby-bouncers/fisher-price-my-little-snugapuppy-deluxe-bouncer-x7313-19346216">https://www.toysrus.com/buy/baby-bouncers/fisher-price-my-little-snugapuppy-deluxe-bouncer-x7313-19346216</a><br><br><a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="https://www.sears.com/carter-s-whale-of-a-time-high-chair/p-04924695000P" title="Link: https://www.sears.com/carter-s-whale-of-a-time-high-chair/p-04924695000P">https://www.sears.com/carter-s-whale-of-a-time-high-chair/p-04924695000P</a><br>

celainev

@redfallon thanks so much! I'll take a look at those!

redfallon

chaelainev said:

@redfallon thanks so much! I'll take a look at those!

You're welcome! The bouncer chair was a life saver with DD and now with DS. It helps out so much. Our most-used baby item with both kids, for sure.

oregonmommy-2

@xmasbaby15 my husband swore he would not change diapers while I was pregnant.. Now he changes them all the time! He told me the other day "I don't mind changing his diapers because I love him." My husband watches our little guy while I'm at work though so he has to do everything! I am very blunt though and I made it very clear that we are BOTH parents which means we are both on duty 24/7.. 

BethP321

Mine also refuses to change diapers (tonight he layed on the couch while his MOM changed a super explodey diaper, playing on his phone).  He gets so mad at me for making us late when we leave the house, but usually it's because I'm the one who has to get baby ready, change his diaper, change his clothes, give him a bottle, pack the diaper bag, put him in the car seat, ALL while trying to get MYSELF ready at the same time.

And don't even get me started on dinner time...  We sit down to eat and baby starts fussing and daddy won't even move a muscle.  Really?  No wonder mama bear's porridge was cold.  

And even tonight he wouldn't watch baby for ten minutes so I could shower. He said "I have to go to bed so I can work tomorrow" (it's always the work excuse) and I got so upset I refused to give him the baby and went to another room.  An HOUR later he's still sitting in the same position on the couch, clearly not in bed or sleeping.

Not that I'm anywhere near a single mom (I don't know how you ladies do it) but it certainly feels like I am, I feel so alone.  We had a huge blow up fight a few weeks ago and he swore and promised he would help... That lasted about a week, if that.  I'm done.

okay sorry, that was longer than I thought.  I need to journal or vent some of these mama hormones out of my system.

BrookeBrown2015

My dh doesn't even have the work excuse. He just straight out says I have the boobs so I'm supposed to take care of him. And yeah, I breastfeed (mostly) but he just means I should do it all because I am the woman.