Separation issues?

codeeye

I am a FTM and although I have been pregnant before I have never been this far along (32 weeks). Yesterday I had to travel to another city about three hours away and was gone for the whole day. My SO was leaving for work when I left and in bed when I got home so I didn't see him for the whole day. This is the second time this situation as come up recently and I seem to have major clingy issues afterwards. It's like I don't want to be away from him for any given period of time. I am already off work due to back problems and literally my whole day seems to revolve around when he will be home next. I long for his lunch hour and can hardly wait for him to come home after work. Thankfully he loves the attention so I'm not annoying him haha! I'm just wondering if anyone else is feeling like this or has experienced this sort of thing before. When I asked my circle of friends most of them laughed and said they were more likely to want him to be away from them during the last trimester. I even cried when he went back to work after lunch today! Which is silly cause he will be off in 4 hours! I feel silly! 

dshannah

Omg same! DH and I have to travel this week, and I took an early flight and he's catching a later one and I'm going to pick him up from he airport tonight (we are traveling together but flying separately). Just being on different flights has me a total mess!!!

I was super mushy this morning when we said goodbye and I've felt terrible all day knowing he's a thousand miles away and I keep freaking out about whether he's been in a car accident on the way to work or there was an active shooter in his office or his flight crashes (heaven forbid)---it's only a freaking day!!! Oy.

kbrands7

Normal pregnancy hormones at work! DH was on a work trip this week and I cried the morning he left. Not pregnant, I would have been a little sad, but I wouldn't have panic-cried. I've known many women to feel more clingy towards their significant other in the third trimester.

JennyS86

My mom came to visit in Feb, and I teared up when she left.  Usually she is the one who cries, not me!!

RSaini

I thought it was just me but I'm so glad it isn't!! I feel more clingy than usual and I'm not clingy at all!! I have my moments but nothing like this!! Thanks for the reassurance ladies! 

gampster

DH and I usually take seperate vacations and this year it was so hard! We couldn't even skype because it made me weepy to see him on camera. I was gone for two weeks to see my family and even called the airline to see how much it would cost for me to come home sooner. (Way too much). Now we have been seperated for a week and he got bumped from his flight meaning an extra 24 hours apart and it's killing me!

Knottie1433777995

The other night me and my husband drove different cars home from his mother's house, and I cried the whole way home. It's only a 20 mile drive. That's how ridiculous I've been sometimes lately!

yogahh

Wow I'm the complete opposite. You know in the movies when the pregnant woman is annoyed by every. Little. Thing. Her husband does (like the way he breathes and eats)?  Yeah that's me. I wish I had these hormones instead! 

lalala2004

I wouldn't say I'm so extreme, but I've noticed a little more clinginess. Normally I wouldn't think twice about going to bed before him, but now I want him in there with me or I don't sleep as well. Same thing if I wake up and he's not in bed.

kbrands7

Lol @yogahh I get more easily annoyed with him too...but also don't want him far from me. So it's basically DH's worst nightmare when I'm in a particularly irritable mood.

Eta: a few weeks ago he asked me if I wanted him close by that day just so I could pick on him. 

jaimwags

My partner and i live and work together, different shifts but i get so overwhelmed and miserable when i know my partner finishes and i start an hour later. I thought i was just feeling sooky and clingy but i guess im not the only one.

Bltbear82

DH normally works pretty crazy hours but since January it's been insane and he leaves before 7 and gets home around 11/12. He's gone into the office every weekend since the holidays for at least 8 hours except the one we went away for. He runs the department so he's never really unavailable to approve things even when he's home. Usually it's manageable, it comes with the job and he's been in advertising for our entire relationship so long hours aren't a new thing for us. I just want to see my husband when I'm not half asleep. Being pregnant and having a toddler makes it harder because I'm so tired at night. I don't think it's pregnancy making me clingy, it's more the whole situation. But I do get annoyed more easily if it takes him awhile to respond to texts, even though I logically know he's as responsive as he can be right now. 

wsgjmw1

DH is leaving this weekend to visit his brother ... And I have already cried a dozen times since he made the plans . We haven't been apart overnight since I've been pregnant and as much as he drives me insane sometimes I am
going to miss him. I also believe the hormones make it that much harder and make me
that much more dramatic about the situation.

JessicaB0627

yogahh said:

Wow I'm the complete opposite. You know in the movies when the pregnant woman is annoyed by every. Little. Thing. Her husband does (like the way he breathes and eats)?  Yeah that's me. I wish I had these hormones instead! 

Stuck in a box?

So much this! 

kp90

I'm a FTM so I don't know from past experience but sounds normal to me. I'm the same way only my SO is military and he just left this morning for the whole week so it has me bummed out and really praying nothing happens while he's gone. I depend on him a lot. I'm trying to look at the time I'll have in the evenings after work as time to work on the nursery and finish things around the house and a break from cooking... try to find the silver lining to your alone time. Hope this helps.

wamam027

kp90 said:

I'm a FTM so I don't know from past experience but sounds normal to me. I'm the same way only my SO is military and he just left this morning for the whole week so it has me bummed out and really praying nothing happens while he's gone. I depend on him a lot. I'm trying to look at the time I'll have in the evenings after work as time to work on the nursery and finish things around the house and a break from cooking... try to find the silver lining to your alone time. Hope this helps.

Totally get it, sorry you have to deal with a military SO as well. On the bright side, a week will fly by. I on the other hand, am 3 weeks into an 11 month deployment. 

JessicaB0627

ncm0328 said:

kp90 said:

I'm a FTM so I don't know from past experience but sounds normal to me. I'm the same way only my SO is military and he just left this morning for the whole week so it has me bummed out and really praying nothing happens while he's gone. I depend on him a lot. I'm trying to look at the time I'll have in the evenings after work as time to work on the nursery and finish things around the house and a break from cooking... try to find the silver lining to your alone time. Hope this helps.

Totally get it, sorry you have to deal with a military SO as well. On the bright side, a week will fly by. I on the other hand, am 3 weeks into an 11 month deployment. 

I am so sorry!! Will they be able to get your H home for a couple days when the baby is born? 

DH is supposed to leave for a 9 month deployment in October and every time I think about being home alone that long with a 3 year old and a 5 month old I have a panic attack. 

kp90

ncm0328 said:

kp90 said:

I'm a FTM so I don't know from past experience but sounds normal to me. I'm the same way only my SO is military and he just left this morning for the whole week so it has me bummed out and really praying nothing happens while he's gone. I depend on him a lot. I'm trying to look at the time I'll have in the evenings after work as time to work on the nursery and finish things around the house and a break from cooking... try to find the silver lining to your alone time. Hope this helps.

Totally get it, sorry you have to deal with a military SO as well. On the bright side, a week will fly by. I on the other hand, am 3 weeks into an 11 month deployment. 

@ncm0328 Ahhh I'm so sorry. That's awful. I can't imagine. Stay strong, I'm sure you will get through it. Seek support from friends, family or feel free to message me any time. Mine is on recall until December so he could also deploy at any given moment and its driving me crazy. Like constantly walking on eggshells. He leaves for a month out of country in June also which I am not looking forward to but things could always be worse. We are strong and independent when we need to be! Hang in there. Hugs.

wamam027

JessicaB0627 said:

ncm0328 said:

kp90 said:

I'm a FTM so I don't know from past experience but sounds normal to me. I'm the same way only my SO is military and he just left this morning for the whole week so it has me bummed out and really praying nothing happens while he's gone. I depend on him a lot. I'm trying to look at the time I'll have in the evenings after work as time to work on the nursery and finish things around the house and a break from cooking... try to find the silver lining to your alone time. Hope this helps.

Totally get it, sorry you have to deal with a military SO as well. On the bright side, a week will fly by. I on the other hand, am 3 weeks into an 11 month deployment. 

I am so sorry!! Will they be able to get your H home for a couple days when the baby is born? 

DH is supposed to leave for a 9 month deployment in October and every time I think about being home alone that long with a 3 year old and a 5 month old I have a panic attack. 

It's not looking like it, no. He's navy so unfortunately unless it's considered a medical emergency, they typically just announce the birth on the ship intercom and that's that. I just got diagnosed with pre-eclampsia and my mom is literally as far across the country as she could be, we just got to VA in December so I really only have one friend that I know and her husband is deployed and she's got a 3 month old. My mom is going to fly out when I get some sort of notice from my dr regarding when it might be baby time, hopefully given the circumstances I get at least a little notice cause she's a 5 hour drive from an airport and at least a 6 hour flight from me, they don't offer nonstop flights. It's a big mess, but it's the military so at some point you learn to expect it and just deal! It's all good, everything will work out regardless. Sorry you're having to deal with deployment in October with two small kids, it's not easy when you're by yourself, throwing one baby let alone two kids makes it even more of a roller coaster. Hang in there! The way I see it, the hectic aspect of babies/kids will (hopefully) make time fly by more quickly!! 

wamam027

kp90 said:

ncm0328 said:

kp90 said:

I'm a FTM so I don't know from past experience but sounds normal to me. I'm the same way only my SO is military and he just left this morning for the whole week so it has me bummed out and really praying nothing happens while he's gone. I depend on him a lot. I'm trying to look at the time I'll have in the evenings after work as time to work on the nursery and finish things around the house and a break from cooking... try to find the silver lining to your alone time. Hope this helps.

Totally get it, sorry you have to deal with a military SO as well. On the bright side, a week will fly by. I on the other hand, am 3 weeks into an 11 month deployment. 

@ncm0328 Ahhh I'm so sorry. That's awful. I can't imagine. Stay strong, I'm sure you will get through it. Seek support from friends, family or feel free to message me any time. Mine is on recall until December so he could also deploy at any given moment and its driving me crazy. Like constantly walking on eggshells. He leaves for a month out of country in June also which I am not looking forward to but things could always be worse. We are strong and independent when we need to be! Hang in there. Hugs.

They always seem to send them at the most convenient of times don't they?! Sorry that he will be gone in June and is on recall until December, they have a way of keeping families anxious about last minute periods of separation. Thanks and hugs to you too! 

vinerie

I would be of course very upset if my husband was gone for months on end! You military wives/SOs take on a lot!!

I'm not clingy right now, but that being said, both of us have been extra lovey-dovey lately. Lots of "I love yous" and extra long, lingering kisses and adoring statements like "I'm so glad I'm married to you." lol. I know, it's mushy. Still, my husband texted me to ask if it was okay if he stayed late at work on Tuesday and I casually said "of course not" while internally being all "Yes!! Alone time on the couch!" 

southerngirlgetsfit

I so know where you are coming from. My husband works seven days away, then seven days home. He's been doing this the entire time we've been married and 6 of the 7 years we've been together. I've gotten used to it years ago, and it really works for us. I'm a loner, so I NEED my time to myself. 

Well for the past month or so, every week when he leaves I am fine when he tells me goodbye at about 4am (I guess I'm half asleep lol..) but as soon as I'm up for the day and it hits me that the house is empty, I burst into tears. I'm fine by the second day, but for whatever reason, it's making me so emotional the closer to my due date I get.

I had a little scare this week and had to go into the hospital to be monitored and thankfully he was home. But at one point, I thought about what I would've done if he wasn't home this week and I burst into tears again! Pregnancy hormones, I tell ya..

kp90

southerngirlgetsfit said:

I so know where you are coming from. My husband works seven days away, then seven days home. He's been doing this the entire time we've been married and 6 of the 7 years we've been together. I've gotten used to it years ago, and it really works for us. I'm a loner, so I NEED my time to myself. 

Well for the past month or so, every week when he leaves I am fine when he tells me goodbye at about 4am (I guess I'm half asleep lol..) but as soon as I'm up for the day and it hits me that the house is empty, I burst into tears. I'm fine by the second day, but for whatever reason, it's making me so emotional the closer to my due date I get.

I had a little scare this week and had to go into the hospital to be monitored and thankfully he was home. But at one point, I thought about what I would've done if he wasn't home this week and I burst into tears again! Pregnancy hormones, I tell ya..

They are a real B!

I find myself sobbing uncontrollably over things I normally would not cry like that over. So fun.