We asked my parents, his parents, and my sister and her husband to make are they are up to date and get it if they aren't. No one had any issue. I basically decided that I am not going to give AF about asking anyone who wants to be around the baby during those two months. If you have personal issues with getting vaccinated, fine, but you don't get to see my baby. My mom said that in the "old days" people just didn't bring their babies around people while they built up immunity or waited for vaccines, so I already feel nice enough sharing mine with a few people and I don't think it's a lot to ask them to be healthy when see her.
My husband and I got into a fight about this yesterday. My mom is coming the first two weeks after the baby is born and his mother will come for one week when my mom leaves. The doctor told us we both need to get it which of course he's on board with... but after doing additional research I said I thought both of our mothers should get it as they'll be in constant contact with the baby for those first few weeks. My mom is my mom and I'm fine with telling her/asking her anything and she'll be fine with it, but my husband REFUSES to ask his mom. He said we're not going to be "those people" and he'd rather his mom never visit than ask her to get the shot. I said, what about asking people to use hand sanitizer before holding the baby? Or if someone is sick to not allow them to visit? And he told me I was insane!! His brother and sister in law have a 2 year old and 4 year old and brought them both to visit his mom in the hospital after surgery when they ALL had sinus colds. Obviously I cannot assume others will make responsible choices and I have to have rules!! Am I seriously insane for wanting our mothers to get the shots, and requesting sick people don't visit !?! I know it's being cautious, but what's wrong with being cautious with a newborn? I've spent the last seven months of my life following every strict and overprotective guideline for caring for my baby and I don't have a right to ask our family to take precautions as well! If you can't tell, I am apparently still mad about this!!
Kit&Cat I think you're 100% in the right to ask your family to abide by your rules, if that's vaccinations and no sick people it's your call! You have to decide what's best for your LO. Honestly I would not go through your DH asking your MIL, give her a call to check in, tell her while at your OB appointment they mentioned anyone in close contact with your baby before 2 months needs to get the booster. Your DH sounds like he's making assumptions, talk to her and she might have no problem with it. You're not being "those people" you're taking care of your baby! Just like you haven't been drinking or eating rare meat for the past 7 months!
@kit&cat you're definitely not crazy. The mothers should get the vaccine if they're going to have that much contact with LO, and family/friends need ground rules if they don't follow common courtesy around a newborn on their own. Respiratory and gastrointestinal illnesses can be extremely dangerous to newborns.
My husband and I got into a fight about this yesterday. My mom is coming the first two weeks after the baby is born and his mother will come for one week when my mom leaves. The doctor told us we both need to get it which of course he's on board with... but after doing additional research I said I thought both of our mothers should get it as they'll be in constant contact with the baby for those first few weeks. My mom is my mom and I'm fine with telling her/asking her anything and she'll be fine with it, but my husband REFUSES to ask his mom. He said we're not going to be "those people" and he'd rather his mom never visit than ask her to get the shot. I said, what about asking people to use hand sanitizer before holding the baby? Or if someone is sick to not allow them to visit? And he told me I was insane!! His brother and sister in law have a 2 year old and 4 year old and brought them both to visit his mom in the hospital after surgery when they ALL had sinus colds. Obviously I cannot assume others will make responsible choices and I have to have rules!! Am I seriously insane for wanting our mothers to get the shots, and requesting sick people don't visit !?! I know it's being cautious, but what's wrong with being cautious with a newborn? I've spent the last seven months of my life following every strict and overprotective guideline for caring for my baby and I don't have a right to ask our family to take precautions as well! If you can't tell, I am apparently still mad about this!!
My SO is pro-vaccinations but he HATES asking people to get them before they see the baby. So I did it. Like you, I just called my Mom and was like - if you're going to fly the 3000 miles to be here with us and the new baby, you might as well get the boosters since, you know, I will lock you in a room sans baby if you don't. To which my mother laughed and said of course she'd get the boosters - no skin off her nose, easy peasy. And furthermore, she'd round up any stray family members and make them get it too (my Mom is awesome). But my SO hemmed and hawed and put off telling his Mom. So I just emailed her and said that the doctor and the CDC said this was the way to do it, so if she could also, that would be best. And she wrote back with she'd check with her doctor to see if she could, so I suppose that's taken care of? Of course, she CCd my SO on her reply email, because of course she did, but SO was like "Oh good, you did this, thanks." when he read it, so meh.
Point being: Just mention that it's highly recommended by your OB/GYN, or cite some sort of policy atthe hospital (mine actually has a policy of requiring any adults that visit for prolonged periods to be vaccinated and not be sick).
Reviving this... for those that have asked family visitors that will be around baby to get their TDAP booster: I have some IL's that have yet to get theirs. EDD is in 3 days, if he comes in the next week should I bar them from visiting? I read it takes 2 weeks for your body to build up antibodies from the vaccine.
It may be overprotective but I really do want people to get the booster if they want to visit. I asked them to get it months ago. Is dousing them in hand sanitizer sufficient so that I'm not the crazy new mom? Or do I just say sorry come back when you're vaccinated? What would you do?
If I'm not mistaken, the tdap vaccine lasts 10 years for adults, right? So a person wouldn't need one if they've been jabbed in the last decade.
Per a pediatrician I spoke to, many people mistakenly believe they had the TDAP 10 years ago but may have only received a tetanus shot. It was more common back then to not necessarily have the combined vaccine. Those who had it in the last 5 years should be okay but it is best for them to check with their provider to see what they actually received. And if in doubt it is best to have an updated vaccine.
Everyone in my family is on board with getting it- what helped was that last year my town had a whooping cough and a measles outbreak and I talked to them about how they were my baby's heard so they needed to protect him. Now we just need to actually go and do it
Forgot to actually weigh in on vaccine. All grandparents, siblings (and spouses) and a few close friends will all have had TDAP prior to handling our LO. Most had it about 2 years ago when others were having children so timing wise it isn't an issue and the pediatrician okay'd it. I'll likely try to limit holding etc from others for the first few weeks regardless but otherwise will keep babyganics sanitizer close by just in case.
I don't quite understand the pushback for this vaccine given the vast amount of research and medical recommendations on the matter.... But ... Another option for someone who refuses to get an updated vaccine would be for them to have labwork done to check immunity. Again, not really a time saver nor a savings but someone with strong feelings on the matter could go that route and prove they aren't potentially dangerous.
I'm glad this came up. It reminded me to send out a family-wide email about vaccines. My SIL is an anti-vaxxer and yet she made MH and me get TDAP before we met my niece when she was born. Well, guess who hasn't been immunized and had whooping cough this winter? Very same niece. I don't think she's had MMR or polio vaccines or anything...and they plan to visit this summer. OY! So I figure I can send a family-wide email and just include them in it. Everyone else will be game, it's just the nutters I have to deal with gingerly.
My FIL (who is a doctor) will not get his...he said he's had it in the past 10 years so he is covered. I worry that he didn't actually get TDAP, but just the tetanus shot. And besides, 10 years is a long time and there may be different strains of pertussis out there that weren't being spread 5 years ago. I'm finding conflicting information on the CDC website...they say adults should only get the TDAP once, but then they also say that after 4 years, only 3-4 people out of 10 still have protective antibodies. So...kind of feeling confused and worried about pressing the issue. My parents went ahead and got theirs anyways, so I just don't see what the big deal is about getting a shot that may or may not be needed but may mean the difference in my baby's health.
DH flips out everytime I ask him about this. His mom who will be around ALOT after the baby is here, checked and had one exactly 10 years ago. I've been asking them to get updated since EASTER and because I ask him to check in once or twice a week he ends up flipping out , shouting and calling ME the drama queen. Baby is due on Monday. Come on people get your act together!!
When my sister had her babies, I felt actually honored that she wanted me to get the tdap shot, because she wanted me most around her new baby. I felt a sense of responsibility to the new baby.
I don't know why people get so upset about it. If it helps prevent a dangerous condition, I'm all for it. Imagine refusing, to get the shot, but still demand to see the baby...then baby getting sick, how awful would you feel.
This time I got it at 32 weeks and actually got a little sick, but was fine after a few days.
So after a little threat about not allowing him to go out and play with his friends today without asking his mom first he did ask, she got it last week and he apologized for being such a jerk. Just glad it is all over with and LO will be protected. At least from whopping cough!
Re: How important is Tdap for visiting adults?
Point being: Just mention that it's highly recommended by your OB/GYN, or cite some sort of policy atthe hospital (mine actually has a policy of requiring any adults that visit for prolonged periods to be vaccinated and not be sick).
It may be overprotective but I really do want people to get the booster if they want to visit. I asked them to get it months ago. Is dousing them in hand sanitizer sufficient so that I'm not the crazy new mom? Or do I just say sorry come back when you're vaccinated? What would you do?
Now we just need to actually go and do it
I don't quite understand the pushback for this vaccine given the vast amount of research and medical recommendations on the matter.... But ... Another option for someone who refuses to get an updated vaccine would be for them to have labwork done to check immunity. Again, not really a time saver nor a savings but someone with strong feelings on the matter could go that route and prove they aren't potentially dangerous.
I don't know why people get so upset about it. If it helps prevent a dangerous condition, I'm all for it. Imagine refusing, to get the shot, but still demand to see the baby...then baby getting sick, how awful would you feel.
This time I got it at 32 weeks and actually got a little sick, but was fine after a few days.
Disclaimer- I don't like the use of the word fetus here but I think it gets the point across