DH and I have been spinning our wheels on this so I'm putting it to other experienced mama's for fresh perspective.
My BIL is getting married next month on a nighttime cruise ship 2 hours out of town. He wants us to drive up to stay with he and his fiance the day before the wedding, then on the day of the wedding the ship departs/wedding starts right at DD's bedtime and doesn't return until 11:30pm. Their invitation explicitly asks not to bring children under the age of 10 for this reason. Agreed. However, they want us to bring DD (she'll be 7 months). Once the ship docks at 11:30pm we will travel the 2 hours back home, and be heading straight for the airport for a 5am flight out of state for a family reunion. As you can imagine, I'm very concerned about wreaking this kind of havoc on DD's sleep schedule as she is a scheduled baby and doesn't do well when her naps/feedings/bedtime are thrown off. DH thinks "playing it by ear" and trying to keep her awake for the wedding will work out fine. I think she will be a living terror if not that night, certainly the next day while we're traveling.
My DH's ideal scenario is to for us all to stay with his brother starting the night before the wedding, then bring her to the wedding and try to keep her distracted and awake for the event. He understandably wants his side of the family to meet her. DH thinks we can bring her stroller and let her sleep in it in or baby wear her in the middle of the reception. He says she does well sleeping through noise. I agree with this during the day but not so much at night. At bedtime, we play soft music for her to fall asleep to and stay quiet in the living room to avoid waking her.
My ideal scenario would be for us to drive there for the wedding the morning of, and to leave her home in the care of family until we get back that night. That way, she will be in her own bed and her schedule will be adhered to. We will still be able to witness my BIL's wedding and the baby will be well-rested for the following day.
What would you all do? Really hoping some unbiased opinions will help us out here!