And the "Mother of the Year" award goes to...

MissMheMhe

Not me! Last week we took DS to his 2 month appt and his weight was low. He was only up .5 oz from his weight check 2 weeks prior! So we had to start supplementing. I've been doing weighted feeds every feeding to see how much breastmilk he is getting from me. Turns out, barely 1 oz at most feedings! Early morning and mid afternoon were better at 3-4 oz. Talk about a terrible feeling! I've basically been starving my child. He was getting just enough to maintain, not gain weight. I felt so disgusted with myself! 
Well, we've been supplementing with pumped milk and a little formula because I can't produce enough for him every feeding. This kid was 9lbs 6.5oz last Wednesday. This morning he was 10lbs 5oz!!! Almost 1 pound in 5 days!! I'm working so hard to keep my supply up (fenugreek, flaxseed oil, oatmeal, mothers milk tea, gatorade, coconut water, coconut oil and tons of plain old H2O.) The only thing I haven't tried yet is a malt beverage. I'm determined to give my boy something from my body. Studies show as little as 50ml of breastmilk a day is enough to provide antibodies and all the goodness of liquid gold. We still nurse through the night and first thing in the morning, so he is getting more than that. I feel so much better now knowing he is growing and getting all the nourishment he needs!

Kimberlyain

I know how you feel but you can't get down on yourself. You are doing everything possible to increase your supply. You are an amazing mother because you are trying to do what is best for your baby! 

MissMheMhe

Thank you! I've been feeling better and better as I watched him gain these past several days. I was in tears after the appt, but now I feel better after I realized I'm giving him exactly what he needs! 

stephanienjer

As someone once told me, you'll find what works, and it will work for you. It doesn't matter if it works for anyone else. 
I can feel for you. Thanks to an undiagnosed tongue tie, and the "rule" that you introduce nothing but breast the for the first month, my daughter lost 1.5 pounds in the first 4 days at home. We knew she wasn't getting enough--she would scream and cry for hours until she was exhausted. The LC kept pushing us to keep trying breast only. I wanted to go out and buy a pump and bottle feed (I knew I was producing,) but the LC discouraged that. Turns out, I had a bad LC. My doctor told me exactly to do that. Pump. Bottle feed. We're at 8 weeks now, and my supply just never came in (I could get .5 oz after pumping for an hour. That's just too stressful.)
I've gotten over the guilt of formula feeding. LO and I have bonded. She's getting what she needs. It's OK.
Trust your instincts. What is right for you IS right for you.

JandJ62914

I experienced something very similar so I've been there and completely empathize with you right now. When DD was born she weighed 8lb 4oz. Then at her 2 week appointment she was down to 7lb 3oz! She had been eating constantly in the days leading up to her appointment so I was expecting her to have gained a lot. Nope!

The pediatrician, LC, and I eventually figured out that she was gobbling up the foremilk and leaving behind the hindmilk. So not only was she leaving behind fat and calories, but it then caused my supply to drop drastically. So my baby was hungry and even though she was eating constantly she never got enough to satiate her. I felt AWFUL and guilty, like I wasn't even meeting my baby's most needs. I can completely understand how crappy it feels to find out your baby isn't gaining weight like he's supposed to! 

I started to pump after every feeding and supplement with formula. I also drink Mother's Milk tea. Eventually my supply did build back up and I haven't had to supplement in 3 weeks now. I actually just had her two month check up and she's up to 10 lb 7oz! So keep doing what you're doing and hopefully you can build up your supply. If not, then however your baby gets his nourishment is okay! What matters at the end of the day is that he's getting the nourishment be needs and that he knows he's loved and cared for, all of which you're doing. I'm glad you're feeling better about it! 

maureenmce

Oh gosh, I was in such a similar spot - my LO was only getting .2 oz from me after 20 minutes on the breast!  Do not beat yourself up at all - it is incredibly hard to tell without a weighted feed how much a baby is getting from the breast.  I saw multiple doctors and lactation consultants who waved away my concerns until they finally did a weighted feed and realized there was a significant supply issue.  Since then, we've been doing a mix of formula and whatever breast milk I can manage to get and baby is doing great since supplementing.  She's a little behind percentile wise (around 10%) because she had a rough start until we figured out the problem, but our pediatrician is really happy with her progress and overall health.  And it sounds like your baby has already gained a lot of weight and is on the healthy path!  

nackie

I'm in a similar situation.  DS was 8 lbs 13 oz at birth and today, at 7 weeks, he was 10 even.  We're meeting with another LC later this week, hopefully she can help.  The one we met with when he was three weeks told me he was getting plenty of milk at each feeding, but that obviously isn't the case.  For now we're supplementing after each round of nursing.

Ebiejay

I would have been in the same position, but due to a surgery I had a few years ago we knew I would likely have issues so we were able to be on top of it. We had pediatrician appointment the day after we brought him home to weigh him (good job, he'd lost 10% of his weight already and had been crying all night cos he'd been so hungry so I know how you feel, I felt like a terrible mother for starving him) and had appointments with LCs. I'm still supplementing, but I don't feel bad because I'm working hard to provide the breastmilk I can. He's putting weight on now and seems happy, and he's starting eating less from the bottle so I'm hoping that means he's getting more from me!

You should be proud you're doing what you can, and don't feel bad, there's no way you could have known. There's nothing wrong with formula either! Have you tried making lactation cookies? I love them, and find them so easy to grab as a night snack after a feed.

Blueyedsky

You got this! It sounds like baby is getting everything he can from you try to relax!

In other mother-of-the-year news, my baby was extremely fussy the other day and barely slept all morning and afternoon. During this time, I drank over a liter of an off brand soda I thought was fruit punch flavor. I didn't even think to check for caffeine until later that night. Yeah turns out it was a knock of for mountain dew red, and had other energy compounds in it as well as a crap ton of caffeine. I know some babies are fine with it, but mine was obviously not! Ladies and gentlemen, your mother of the year.

KimC2010

Mine isn't quite as serious but my dd was in her car seat while we were in the drive-thru line at Dairy Queen for some ice cream and she was screaming, which she does a lot if the car isn't moving, so we didn't check on her.  She continued crying while we were driving after getting our ice cream.  When we got out at my in-laws' house we found out why she was crying so hard, her headband had fallen down and was covering her eyes.  Oops!

2winterbabies

stephanienjer said:

As someone once told me, you'll find what works, and it will work for you. It doesn't matter if it works for anyone else. 
I can feel for you. Thanks to an undiagnosed tongue tie, and the "rule" that you introduce nothing but breast the for the first month, my daughter lost 1.5 pounds in the first 4 days at home. We knew she wasn't getting enough--she would scream and cry for hours until she was exhausted. The LC kept pushing us to keep trying breast only. I wanted to go out and buy a pump and bottle feed (I knew I was producing,) but the LC discouraged that. Turns out, I had a bad LC. My doctor told me exactly to do that. Pump. Bottle feed. We're at 8 weeks now, and my supply just never came in (I could get .5 oz after pumping for an hour. That's just too stressful.)
I've gotten over the guilt of formula feeding. LO and I have bonded. She's getting what she needs. It's OK.
Trust your instincts. What is right for you IS right for you.

Yep. Exactly what happened to me. I was EBF then DD was spitting up like crazy from my horrible dieting. Doctor suggested to pump and my supply never came in. 1st pump was 5 oz from breast. Great! 2nd time barely .5 oz from both breasts and that was that! How discouraging and guilty I felt! I look at formula as a life saver now....without it I couldn't nourish DD, I don't feel guilty anymore about FF.

MissMheMhe

Thank you everyone for sharing your stories! Motherhood is hard! But I know we are all doing our very best!

jem8407

The support displayed by everyone is beautiful. I am so honored to be a January Bumpie with you ladies. 
That being said, I think many Mothers will struggle and mentally beat themselves up over perceived issues. Whether it is V or C birth, BF or FF, staying home or daycare; I have a true gut feeling that everyone on here is doing the right thing. Let's keep up the women's intuition and positivity! We are slaying Motherhood no matter what. 

KimC2010

Yep we are all unique our situations are different and our babies are all individuals.  Each one of us is doing the best we can. If your baby is growing and thriving, then you are awesome. 

mekaswifestyle

Don't ever feel bad for making a mistake like that! You figured out the problem and started working hard to fix it! I understand how you feel though my baby has to have soy and we wanted so badly to breastfeed but he couldn't tolerate it no matter what I did! Your baby has a great mom!

sni5

I had the same issue , pumping after every feed and if required then formula , very rarely I reach a stage to give formula , I have been drinking the mothers milk tea twice and the fenugreek capsules too , I do see the supply go up but how many times did u drink the tea and capsules ?