Fighting Sleep

ladyofsummer

Any advice for LOs who like to fight sleep? My two week old has been doing it since shortly after we got home.

He'll get tired and start to cry and try to nurse again, but I know it's just for comfort. I've gotten to where I'll hold him and put a pacifier in his mouth, but then if I set him down he'll wake back up and we're on it again.

He's not hungry, he's just fighting sleep. He's well fed, gaining like crazy already, and he goes through the amount of wet and BM diapers he should. My FIL thinks I need to feed him every time he cries and that drives me crazy. I have a 'fed less than 30-20 mins wait an hour before feeding again and more than that wait two hours' rule when he starts to show cues, and I wake him if he ever sleeps four hours straight to feed him too.

Gas isn't the problem, he gets burped. I just can't for the life of me figure out how to get him to stop fighting sleep. He does it day and night but it's easier to handle during the day. I keep falling asleep holding him and it worries me.

willkc

My LO LOVES to fight sleep. He does the same thing you described and wants to nurse himself to sleep all the time. During the day I fight it more and rock him while basically shoving a paci in his mouth and eventually he will pass out... At night though I sometimes just give in and nurse him for 5 minutes cause I'm so tired and it puts him right to sleep. It's been really frustrating he acts like he's so hungry but when I put him on my boob he's passed out cold in 5 minutes or less. 

VitaLuna

Did you read the "cranky time" thread? That could be part of it, which is totally normal. Last night, my LO would fuss, root around, I'd latch her, she'd pull off, fuss, latch, repeat. Some babies are better about being laid down than others. DD1 was terrible about it, wouldn't let me lay her down without waking up. DD2 is better, for the most part. 

I'd get rid of your feeding "rules", though. Particularly during growth spurts, LO needs to be allowed to cluster feed, since it will trigger your body to make more milk. If I have just fed LO, I'll try other things first, but if they need to nurse, they need to nurse.  

CountryAir13

DS does the exact same thing. Almost every time he wants to go to sleep he wants to be nursed to sleep. It doesn't matter if he ate an hour ago or 10 minutes ago. He also refuses to take a pacifier.

Miss Lilac

Honestly, just feed the kid. I nurse my baby to sleep every night quite happily. Even if it's for comfort. Who cares? He's a whopping two weeks old and that's his only way of communicating with you. Maybe he really needs the comfort. Sleep and feed "training" at this stage is a losing battle. It's all on demand. Just help the little guy out and you can all get some sleep. 

ladyofsummer

I have the limit because honestly if I fed him every time he cried he'd be nearing 15 pounds instead of 9. Also, there's been a few times in the past couple of days where I gave in and he was overfed and began spitting up mid-feeding. I know my LO enough to tell when he's hungry and when he's not. I try everything before I feed him and then like @willkc said, it's 5 minutes then he's out - but he'll try to wake up if I move him.

ladyofsummer

Also he does this nearly every time he's tired - morning, afternoon and night.

VitaLuna

ladyofsummer said:

I have the limit because honestly if I fed him every time he cried he'd be nearing 15 pounds instead of 9. 

Hold up. You should absolutely NOT be limiting feeds because you're worried about LO gaining weight. He's two weeks old! It's a little horrifying that you're concerned about your LO being "too big" if you feed him on demand. 

No one is saying you have to feed him every time he cries, but if you've tried other things and nursing is what he wants, then let him nurse.

If you're seeing a lot of spit up or reflux concerns, talk to your pediatrician so they can evaluate it. It sounds like normal baby behavior to me, though. 

Miss Lilac

So you know when he needs to cluster feed versus just being fussy? Mine, now 3 weeks, has had at least 3 major cluster feeds. It's how they regulate supply and prep for a growth spurt. There's really no need to put a newborn on a diet. They won't eat themselves into obeisity. 

jordans_wife

Op I understand what you're saying and agree with you on the overfeeding thing. I've overfed my little guy too and he ended up throwing a bunch up. Fighting sleep is really common in the beginning I think. Mine still does regularly. He's getting a little better as time goes by. I have a sleeper right next to my bed. If I've tried rocking and holding him and he's still mad/fussy bc he's getting over tired then I put him in the sleeper. He can see I'm right there with him and I give him the pacifier. I put it back in if he drops it and starts fussing again. I continue to rinse repeat and comfort him but if it goes on for 30+ minutes and I'm certain it's bc he's fighting sleep then I let him fuss. I just started doing this now that he's a little bit older. If they are truly tired then this won't go on for long and they finally sleep. I always make sure he has a clean diaper before putting him down so I'm not second guessing myself. 

BabySeaTurtles

DD fights sleep like a real champion. I have resorted to the 5 S's: Swaddling (arms out), Shooshing (white noise machine), Swinging (lots of very exaggerated rocking and walking), Sucking (when I can get her to take a pacifier), Side/Stomach position (rocking her on her side before setting her down on her back). It works about half the time. The rest of the time I just comfort nurse to sleep. I am a HUGE advocate of early sleep training but 2 weeks old is way too early for anything. Just do what works.

g8trkim

ladyofsummer said:

I have the limit because honestly if I fed him every time he cried he'd be nearing 15 pounds instead of 9.

I'm really hoping you're kidding here!

Also, spitting up a couple times is hardly a reason to limit feeding him. Babies spit up. Don't make hard and fast rules based on this.

Honestly, I would just nurse to sleep. He's uncomfortable for whatever reason. Just help him out.

A&Lmommy

@ladyofsummer, Is this your first baby or have you implemented this feeding rule/sleep training before?

MississippiCatfish

I know you're a good mom and have the best of intentions. But I do agree that there is nothing wrong with comfort nursing - it is a GOOD thing! Just had this conversation with my husband this morning.  I know it's exhausting, but it's good nutrition-wise and for bonding.  We don't use pacifiers - I know this decision isn't for everyone - so we do a lot of comfort nursing in the evening! my little guy is also two weeks and has gained a pound a week, and the doctor was very happy with that. 

But it sounds like you can sometimes get him to sleep with a pacifier, he just wants to be held while sleeping? I don't think that's abnormal for a two week old. Try to remember how little he is, in the tc grand scheme of life...only two weeks! He hasn't learned how to stay asleep by himself yet - he needs your help sometimes:) trust me, I know it's frustrating, but these are things I remind myself.

have you tried a swing or wearing him in a carrier? Sometimes the movement helps.   With my second son, I had to walk around the block for 30 minutes with him in the carrier every evening and, lo and behold, I think this baby is taking to that too. Not my first choice, but doable. 

mrsc12414

Last night we transitioned dd into her room and her crib. She slept di much better !! I have started a bedtime routine which I hope works and sticks . She would wake up 8+times a night in her basinette ... Last night in her crib she woke twice to eat !