Weekly Check in 2/26

lickastick

Welcome to the weekend ladies!

How far along are you? 
What is you EDD?

How are you feeling?

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?)

Rants/Raves/Questions:

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...
What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP? 
What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)?

carrieandr

How far along are you? 18 weeks tomorrow, baby girl is the size of a sweet potato
What is you EDD? July 30th

How are you feeling? Pretty good. I need to start going back to the gym now that my cold is just about gone, but I don't have the energy for it. I've been waking up about an hour and a half later than usual, too. Where is the second trimester energy I'm supposed to have???

Upcoming appointments? Anatomy scan on 3/16

Rants/Raves/Questions: I'm starting to freak out a little about my growing belly. I'm nervous that it's going to get really uncomfortable and I'm worried about the body I'll be left with when this is all over. (Stretch marks, loose belly skin, flat deflated chest...) Between the two losses and the year it took me to get to a successful pregnancy, my focus has been on the baby's health and survival. Now that she seems safe, my thoughts have wandered to myself. I suppose these are normal fears, but I don't like them. There is so much change coming all at once. A different body, a new baby, a new way of life, and whatever changes all of this will bring to my relationship with my husband. I'm overwhelmed.

GTKY:
What is something you adore about your DH? He makes me laugh.
What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)? He loves to play with kids. And they love him.

lickastick

How far along are you? 12 weeks
What is you EDD? Sept 6ish-10th

How are you feeling?  OMG Itchy belly!!! It is time for belly butter.
I've been more tired this past week than any other week. I have fallen asleep in the afternoon 3x this past week and that hasn't happen yet- until now. 

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?) The u/s yesterday went great- just one little bean in there (phew) Hr 165 and the tech said all looks good. The tech moved my due date up by 4 days which is more in line with when I ovulated. I got my carrier screen results back and I am not a carrier for any diseases of consequence, still waiting on my dh's results. Next up I should get my 1st tri screen results back soon and do NIPT.

Rants/Raves/Questions: This is starting to get real! We found our midwife and she is fantastic. I was so worried I was going to have to go with the original ones because of lack of choice, but the right woman was out there for us and we are so excited!

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...
What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP? 

My DH is so patient while I am queen of impatience. I will throw my hands up or throw an electronic across the room in an instant in frustration and he will have to come in and fix it for me. He is truly dedicated to being of service and that means that he treats me (and our kitten) like princesses. I have had to teach him over the years that he has to take care of himself, and he can't sacrifice himself to the service of others (even to me.) We were talking with the midwife and I was telling her about my postpartum recovery plan- (I hope you ladies are thinking about that  ) I was telling her how I would like to follow the Chinese Medicine recommendations and I am going to try to do nothing but sleep and feed the baby for as long as possible and hopefully for 40 days, and my DH joked that we have been practicing for that every weekend so far. 

What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)?
I think we make a pretty good team, and while I know it doesn't even begin to compare, we have had some pretty funny moments "parenting" our cat (she is so spoiled!) He is way more willing to get out an do stuff while I tend to be more on the lazy/rest at home all weekend kinda person.  He is fiercely loyal and would do anything for someone he loves. 

@CarrieandRoy While I think it is true that our bodies will never be exactly the same, there is so much we can do in pregnancy and postpartum to help us get back to a good place. No matter what type of delivery we have we can consider things like belly binding for the weeks after delivery. The food we eat postpartum will play a big roll in how we bounce back. I can't stress enough how important abdominal and pelvic floor rehab is for every woman postpartum and that starts at about 4-6weeks after a vaginal delivery and a little later for a c-sec birth. That stuff is the tangible that can be successfully influenced and truthfully our bodies know how to bounce back.

The other stuff, well....that's where we take the leap! That baby girl will teach you things that you never imagined you could learn from another being. You still have many weeks to get ready and make a plan, that's the beauty of being pregnant forever. I'm sure the STM's will have much better advice then I can give, but I know I absolutely feel overwhelmed with how life will change after baby. 

redheadbride15

@CarrieandRoy I definitely understand the feeling of being overwhelmed, and I'll reassure you that these are normal fears. I think all pregnant women, but especially FTMs, go through this. I'm not too concerned about my body - it will do what it will, and it wasn't perfect to begin with, so whatever. But the lifestyle is another story altogether. My husband and I are still newlyweds (we'll be married just barely a year when this LO arrives). I wish we had had more time for just the two of us, but age put pressure on us to conceive asap. We have other huge changes coming up too. We're buying our first house. My H is starting a new job. My career is tenuous and I worry whether I'll be able to sustain it while raising a family. I worry how I'll handle sleep deprivation, and a lack of time for myself. I worry that I won't be able to continue my hobbies (especially outdoor activities). I was single for most of my adult life and I'm so used to being alone, but now rather suddenly I have both a husband and baby depending on me.

I've been working through processing these feelings and have accepted that I just have to lean into them. Change is always scary and challenging, but I know my life will be richer for having made this decision. I know I won't regret it in my old age. Sure, things didn't work out in the perfect linear fashion that I would have designed when I was younger, but this is absolutely right. It was meant to happen. It doesn't have to be perfect, but we'll make it work.

You're gonna rock it too!

lillebowski23

How far along are you? 21 weeks 2 days
What is you EDD? July 6th

How are you feeling? Today I am wicked hungry and tired. I've not been sleeping really well this last week. I swear, i drinklinke 2 gallons of water a day and I still wake up dry at night, even with the humidifier!

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?) Very excited about the fetal anatomy scan on Monday!

Rants/Raves/Questions:

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...
What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP? 

He works so hard and is totally committed to creating a simple and great life for our family. Plus, he has a great ass

What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)?

We have very different personalities but we share similar values and I believe he is fully prepared to back me uo in the realm of child rearing. 

redheadbride15

25w3d, EDD June 7th

I feel really good. Baby is now consistently active and kicking, which I find really reassuring.

No major baby news. I had a routine appointment last week which went well. My next isn't until late March.

Question: I need to find a reliable way to do some exercise because I know that that has been helping me feel good. I've officially given up running and while I love to hike I don't have enough time for that right now because I work during the week and our weekends have been overtaken by house-hunting. Who has suggestions?!?

GTKY: My H has a genuine kind, gentle, quiet soul. He always remarks on how grateful he is for the small things in life: a morning cup of coffee, a sunny day, a kiss, a moment snuggling in bed before falling asleep. I know that as a father he will be patient, never angry or judgmental, and will always show unconditional love. I'm a little more pragmatic but rough around the edges. We often joke that we will have a good cop (him)/bad cop (me) parenting strategy.

Wyattnash00

@carrieandRoy, totally normal to start to stress about your ever changing body.  It's a miracle though and the first few months, you and your hubs will be going through the motions together, almost in a fog, your body will bounce back quicker then you think.


@createillumination, best news about the ultrasound!! And equally awesome about a great midwife, things are getting real. Yay!


@redheadbride, so much going on in your life! Any luck with the house hunting? All very exciting things though, I was single most of my adult life too, it's overwhelming knowing how many people need you, but at the same time, it's such a wonderful feeling.  And after baby is born you will wonder how there was a time when this awesome person wasn't in your life.  (Full disclosure, that feeling took me a couple months;) Change is hard for everyone, and this is the biggest change in anyone's life.  It will be a new normal. Plus I feel like I've done everything in my single life that I wanted to do.  Also for working out, I know you're an outdoorsy person so this probably won't be so exciting but it's something. Bikinibodymommy.com, she was pregnant, so she has a workout for every week of her pregnancy, a quick workout with weights.


24+4


EDD: June 6


no major baby news here, for the first time this week, my body let me know I needed to slow down. Chasing a toddler, always moving, working out when he naps, I was in extreme pain.  I have a hard time listening, but not being able to walk won't help anyone. It's going to be a long 3 months.


gtky: love everyone raving about their partners! The best thing in the world is seeing your partner become a parent. It's heart melting.  My hubs is an amazing dad, so hands on, was a zillion times better with a newborn then I ever I was, I was terrified. And he had never been around a newborn.  Watching him with our son, wrestle, play, putting him on his shoulders, seeing their identical smiles, makes everything in life worth living.  Plus he has a nice ass too! And the dimples get me every time!

lickastick

@lillebowski23 that is so exciting you have your anatomy scan so soon. All the good luck!

@redheadbride that is a lot of change all at once! Wowza! Seems like you are navigating it well. If you want to try yoga, yogaglo.com is my favorite online source. They have a ton of prental classes on there. 

carrieandr

I love this board. You guys said just what I needed to hear. I keep coming across articles that tell you to love your stretch marks and postpartum body because it gave you your child. But what I needed to hear is that your body can bounce back and you can do things to help that along. And the belly binding comment reminded me that even while I'm waiting for it to bounce back, I can enjoy sleeping on my stomach and having my body be so much closer to normal just by having my uterus empty again. (Although perhaps nursing will make it uncomfortable to sleep on my stomach? But even so, eventually I will again and it will be wonderful.)

"Lean into the change" also helped me. It reminded me of something my dad taught me about roller coasters years ago. If you tense up and resist going down the hills, you'll hate it. But if you relax and lean into it, it's fun. So I'll try not to let my fear of change alter the way I experience everything. I'll probably have to keep reminding myself of this, but for now, I feel better than I did.

redheadbride15

@Wyattnash00 We've just started house-hunting and to be honest I'm finding it stressful. I'm a city person and initially thought we'd buy a condo near where we are, where I can walk everywhere I want with the baby and take public transportation to work. But I've been so disappointed learning about the state of the Boston public school system, which is apparently terrible, and because we're looking for a long-term investment it's looking more like we'll have to abscond to the suburbs. Honestly, I am a bit depressed by the whole idea (it's part of the list of massive lifestyle changes that I don't feel ready for). I really don't want to be part of the upper middle class white elitism of suburban Boston. Plus, the housing market is INSANE. We'll be very lucky if we can get an offer accepted before baby arrives.

Thanks for the exercise suggestions! I would like to try yoga @createillumination . Otherwise I'm just trying to walk a lot. Fortunately my daily commute involves a lot of walking so that keeps me moving at the very least.

lillebowski23

@redheadbride15 I do 30 mins of resistance training 3x a week (medium weights, resistance bands, body weight exercises) i do these in a gym but just ordered a bunch of bands etc from amazon so that I can continue the routine when I'm home. Here is my routine, which includes current weight machine weights. A lot of these are also knee rehab exercises.  Additionally I walk 5-7 days for 30-45 mins or more depending. I try to do it on my lunch break. Sometimes I do 2-3, 15 min walks if i can't squeeze in the whole 30-45. You could also try incline intervals on a treadmill for 30 mins to mimic hills.

30x clamshells, seated with level 5 band
30x squatting sides-steps with band around knees
20x body weight squats with band around knees
10x ea side single -leg squats with upper body stability
10x bodyweight squats with no band
20x calf raises on a balance pad
3x ea side single leg stand on balance pad or board 30 sec ea leg
2x12 modified push-ups
20x ea As, Ws (w/ Band) Vs, (on balance pad 5# weight)
20x bicep curls
20x tricep dips
2x12 @ 45# Lat Pull Down (recovering from L trap injury in 2015)
2x12 @ 300# Leg Press
2x12 @ 30# Leg Extension (Knee sprain April/Sept 2015 recovery)
2x12 @ 65# Hamstring curl
2x12 @ 40# Upper Back/Rowing
Pec/Calf Stretch
25x Bridges
10x ea side hold for 5 sec Bird-Dog
12x Standing crunches
12x ea side leg slides

Sporty1216

How far along are you? 11w 4d
What is you EDD? 9/12--but will probably do a repeat c-section on the 7th, unless baby has other ideas and decides to come early!

How are you feeling? Pretty darn good! I am still so tired, but that may partly just be life with a full time job and a toddler. I've managed to stay awake to watch one movie with DH this week, and that's a real improvement over the past few months.  Ha!

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?) I have my 12 week appointment on Monday.  We're not doing any of the screenings, so it'll just be a weight, BP, doppler, chat visit, but I CANNOT wait for the doppler.  I want the reassurance of hearing that little heartbeat again.  And then we're going to feel free to go public--as in, I'm shopping for maternity clothes, I will wear maternity shirts (the blump wants it!), and I will let folks know in person (and maybe via FB) that we're expecting a new addition in September.  Monday really cannot get here fast enough (but I can't say that to DH because, though he shares my excitement, he hates when I wish away a weekend).

Rants/Raves/Questions: No real rants or raves--other than that my kiddo has slept through the night three times in the last three weeks! This is a record.  I hope it becomes a trend.  As much as I love snuggling him in the night, I'll be glad when that is the rare exception rather than the rule. I keep trying to figure out how that's going to work once I am ensconced in a snoogle... Hm.

Also, re: the body stuff. I will say that this time, I'm totally looking into belly binding! Especially post-c-section because my scar made a funny little "under belly" and I'd like to see if I can help get rid of that this time around.  I also want to add to the chorus of your body can bounce back.  I did NOTHING special and I returned to my pre-pregnancy weight within about 6 months. I did not return to my pre-pregnancy shape, but if I'd put some effort into it, that may have been more of a possibility. I, frankly, just enjoyed letting my body be what it was going to be.  It was (is?) squishy (be ready for that post-partum.  An empty uterus that is still stretched out is a weird experience and kind of spongy. I wasn't ready for that.  It was strange, but okay once I got used to it and it only lasted for a relatively short while.  Our uteruses are incredible.) and great for snuggling a new little baby.  I didn't want to rush weight loss because I was nursing and didn't want to affect my supply by cutting calories (plus, I suck at will power).  This time, since it is likely our last, I may find myself being a little more anxious to work toward getting toned up, etc., but I just plan to take it as it comes.  Mommy bodies are beautiful--even if they take some getting used to.  And I do think you have some options for how your post-partum body works, as others have pointed out. Anyway.  Ramble, ramble.  But our bodies really are amazing.

Oh, and @redheadbride15 -- my DH and I got married recently too--so when our first came, we had been married just about 1.5 years and now we'll be adding a second before our 4th anniversary.  It is a lot to go from being single for most of our lives to being married and being parents.  But, like you said, I wouldn't have it any other way.  Would it have been great to have some more time to just be married? Absolutely.  But we figure we can have that time when the kids are grown.   You guys will do great, I'm sure!

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...
What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP? I love his loyalty and his smile.  I was just telling a friend today that my DH isn't great at getting cards, etc., but I have let him know it's important to me, so he is getting better.  The primary message in every single one is that he feels so lucky that he gets to do life with me forever.  I couldn't ask for better than that! There is so much comfort and freedom and love in that reassurance that this is our plan--through thick and thin.  I love that.

What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)? My DH will be the first one to tell you that patience is not his strong suit.  But to see how patient and sweet he is with our LO is awesome.  I love how he loves to snuggle our little guy.  At this point, LO is more interested in being on the move, but when they do get sweet snuggle time, it's great to see.

PS--you're all wonderful! Happy Friday!

redheadbride15

@lillebowski23 That's an awesome list! Thanks! I have been walking a lot - at least 30 min/day on top of the walking that I usually do as part of my commute, but it just doesn't FEEL like a cardiovascular workout (even now when I'm pregnant I barely even breathe fast walking up a hill). I've never really done a weight routine because hiking and backpacking has always kept me strong, but I do have some free weights at home (5lb and 10lb). I'm wondering if I should get some bands too - I'd love your suggestions about what to get. I should have made a note that I absolutely abhor gyms, so whatever I can do at home is best. Also, can I hire you as my personal trainer?!?

carrieandr

I've heard that nursing actually helps your uterus shrink up again. Our bodies really are amazing, when you think about it.

My doctor told me that at my age, I should try to get pregnant again soon after my first. I wish I could have lots of time to get back in shape and also take care of an infant without dealing with morning sickness and fatigue. But I'll be 38 when she's born and who knows how long it will take to get pregnant or if I'll have more losses. So the doctor is right that I shouldn't wait. I'm curious how soon he means, though.

Wyattnash00

As an ex MA teacher @redheadbride15, BPS is terrible, though it will be a whole until your little one is in public school, could ease into the move to suburbia?! Plus towns like Milton and Arlington 'can' be affordable, give you a mix of city/suburb and have decent schools.

redheadbride15

Wyattnash00 said:

As an ex MA teacher @redheadbride15, BPS is terrible, though it will be a whole until your little one is in public school, could ease into the move to suburbia?! Plus towns like Milton and Arlington 'can' be affordable, give you a mix of city/suburb and have decent schools.

Arlington is our current front-runner (though "affordable" is a joke - the median house listing is currently >$650k. It has become one of the most competitive housing markets in the country). I think Milton won't work as well for our commutes. We have discussed the possibility of staying in the city for a few more years, but at the same time it seems like the right time in our lives to make a long-term investment in a house. We're already past the point in our lives where the idea of a starter home makes sense. We don't expect our incomes to increase much, interest rates are low right now, and housing prices are only going to continue to go up.

I'm just dismayed that BPS can be so bad when the city is full of SO many rich people. I get angry that such bureaucracy exists to prevent improvement in the system and that the middle class won't or can't support public education. I don't want to be one of the sell-outs.

Wyattnash00

It's a moral dilemma for sure.  Agree with age and the starter home.  I didn't realize Arlington became that pricey, good lord. We're looking in the south shore, near hubs family, also seems to be the most affordable in the state. 

Piperella

How far along are you? What is you EDD? 8w5d EDD is Oct. 2nd

How are you feeling? Still exhausted (can I lay my head down as I type this?) but other than that, no real symptoms.  I did have a moment of anxiety about a specific issue, but DH helped me through it, so I feel victorious right now.

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?) I had two ultrasounds this week.  On Monday it was with the nurse for the ob intake.. I didn't enjoy it at all.  I felt like the nurse was totally discouraging of NIPTs and all she wanted me to do was the NT. My appt. with my RE was bumped up to Wednesday this week, and I loved seeing how much the baby had grown.  I saw hands and feet!  at 8w3d, baby was 19.6mm with a heartbeat of 180 and is still a day ahead.

Rants/Raves/Questions:  Rant:  I really didn't care for the nurse I saw at the appointment, so I'm hoping I can switch nurses.  I like my doctor a lot.. but want to be able to change the nurse.

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...
What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP? 
What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)?
I adore my DH's wit, something that only happens to me between 2am-3am and when sleeping.  He's able to have a "discussion" with anyone, and be persuasive and I love watching the magic happen.  It's great when I get into arguments with my dad.  

Well, he already has changed a diaper before, so he's way ahead on the baby knowledge than I am. I have never ever changed a diaper.  I don't know how he is going to be as a parent. I'm looking forward to finding out.  I think he'll miss all the time he has to play computer games with his friends.  I think I am in for more of a rude awakening than he is though if I'm honest.

Sporty1216

@CarrieandRoy --all of what you said is why I didn't stress too much about getting things all sorted out body-wise post-partum. I was 39 when LO was born. We started trying for #2 when he was 8 months old. I ended up taking a year, so I'll be 41 when this one comes. But, just take it as it comes. You, your DH, and your doctor will all have a better sense of when you want to start working on #2 once #1 is here! (Easier said than done, I know. I'm a total planner and have been figuring out how to make our small
house work with 2 or more kids since I was pregnant with #1!)

Sporty1216

@CarrieandRoy --all of what you said is why I didn't stress too much about getting things all sorted out body-wise post-partum. I was 39 when LO was born. We started trying for #2 when he was 8 months old. It ended up taking a year to get pregnant, so I'll be 41 when this one comes. But, to the extent that you're able, I'd say try to just take it all as it comes. You, your DH, and your doctor will all have a better sense of when you want to start working on #2 once #1 is here! (Easier said than done, I know. I'm a total planner and have been figuring out how to make our small
house work with 2 or more kids since I was pregnant with #1!)

mthoomom

How far along are you?   35 weeks +
What is you EDD?  March 31

How are you feeling?  Hungry. Yesterday I went into the grocery store to grab a few things for dinner, and ended up buying butter pecan ice-cream, strawberries, raspberries, cashews, and cranberry sauce to satiate my cravings! It probably didn't help that my teenage son was encouraging me to buy whatever I wanted... I have also been feeling cramp-y and contraction-y, which is good, because I feel like I need a refresher on those sensations so I won't be knocked off my feet when I go into labor. 

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?)  I've gone from big to huge in the past week! My 36 week appointment is in a few days, and I will find out if baby is head down (pretty sure he is, kicks are all in the ribs) and if I have the dreaded group B strep  

Rants/Raves/Questions: Rave: The Zantac I've been taking for heartburn is a miracle drug. Instead of waking up multiple times a night, I am getting a full 5 hours in a row before my heartburn wakes me up. I'm so happy I asked my midwife about medications instead of continuing to suffer. Rant: My round ligament pain is now worse than ever. When LO punches that area it hurts so badly that it takes my breath away! It is definitely one pregnancy symptom I won't miss. 

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...
What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP? 
What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)?

Okay, huge brag alert!!! My DH is amazing because at age 23, he actively jumped into parenting my sons with both feet. He has always treated them as though they were his own, and refers to them in conversation as "my sons." He has made sure they have had structure and routine in their lives, helps them with their math, and nags them to do the things they are supposed to do. My children are excelling in school, and I give him the majority of the credit for that. He has never once complained about spending time, money, or energy on my kids. I can't wait to see him with our infant son so he can realize his dream of being "the dad" 100% of the time. 

@CarrieandRoy Our bodies are so good at bouncing back from pregnancy! I had my first two children 18 months apart, and I was in better shape after the second was one born than before.

@createillumination You always have the best advice. I really enjoy reading what you have to say.

@lillebowski23 Happy anatomy scan to you! Are you going to find out the sex? 

redheadbride15

@CarrieandRoy I've already started thinking about #2 as well. I hate being in such a rush and I want to focus on one thing at a time, but I also know that I want two children and realistically, we will have to start trying as soon as possible. I haven't discussed this with my doctor, but DH and I have discussed it at length and we don't plan on resuming birth control at all after delivery. I figure if I'm breastfeeding my period won't return for a while, and if the time to conception for #1 is a good indicator then it's very unlikely we'll be able to conceive before a year PP. If we are successful then I the youngest I would be when #2 is born will be 40.

emgee27

How far along are you?  32 +5
What is you EDD?  April 17th

How are you feeling?  still feeling great! Little bit of back soreness in the morning but I have been sleeping so much better lately. Like wake-up-in-a-puddle-of-drool good.  Some feet swelling, yuck.

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?)  had my 2 week check up this week and the midwife was a teeny bit concerned that I gained more than I usually do between check ups but thought it might be too much sodium since my BP was still normal and my urine sample was fine. I have definitely been eating fatty foods. No shame in admitting I had had KFC the night before my appointment, and for breakfast that day. Oops, stupid cravings.  Been keeping it clean and drinking lots of water this week!

Rants/Raves/Questions:  My husband's office threw us a baby shower this week and it was so lovely and SO generous! He has been there for 12 years and they absolutely adore him so it was very sweet to see them go all out for him. They were quite excited to throw a 'man-shower' and invited me to join in. I just can't get over all the love for our first little one.

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...
What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP? 
What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)?
It's cheesy to say but he is truly my better half. He is patient and kind and generous and compassionate. Something I adore is he calls me out on my BS - he is direct and never lets things build up or be ignored. It was hard for me when we first started dating because it's a hard to own your mistakes and downfalls. But it has made us stronger, we don't have to mince words and feel free and strong to express how we really feel with each other. Obviously we do this with kindness and don't speak harshly to each other, but we always know where we stand, our wants and needs are easily communicated and acknowledged by the other person. It makes life so much easier and has allowed us to know each other very well.

He will be a great parent because he is always curious about the world and wants to learn new things. He reads more than anyone I know, about anything and everything. I love that he will pass on this curiosity and love of learning and I can't wait to watch him teaching our little one all sorts of things!

@createillumination I have to agree that you always share such great words and advice. I enjoy reading your comments as well.

@CarrieandRoy I know you have gotten some great advice, I just wanted to let you know I sympathize. I found it much easier to 'let go' once my body actually started making some big changes. I found the positives much easier once I was there (like what a relief to eat a giant plate of food and not have to suck it in - I couldn't even if I tried!)  As you have heard from others, it sounds like we will be able to bounce back later so I'm willing to worry about it later! 

@redheadbride15 I'm trying not to think too much about it now, but I'll also have to think about how soon I want to get preggo again after this baby. I'll be 36 when the baby is born and I had to take Clomid due to PCOS to regulate my cycles. Although it ended up being pretty simple once I started Clomid, I'm worried about what my PP hormones are going to do to my body and cycle afterwards. Plus breastfeeding. I'm pretty much in the same boat as you regarding BC and wanting 2 kids....I guess I'll cross that bridge, just sympathizing!

@lillebowski23  Hope you have a great scan! Exciting!

emsmama15

How far along are you? 13w4d
What is you EDD? August 29, but c-section will (hopefully) be the week of August 15 (38 weeks)

How are you feeling? Pregnancy wise - still very few symptoms.  A little heartburn here and there, round ligament pain sometimes when I stand up too fast, difficulty staying asleep at night.  I'm recovering from strep throat and a HORRIBLE sinus infection.  Oh the pain!  I've never had such a bad one.  Tylenol is just NOT cutting it.  I was actually thinking that if I wasn't pregnant, I'd take a percocet or something!!  Even ibuprofen and some sudafed would probably have helped.  Oh well.  I'm feeling like I may survive!!  

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?)  Had my NIPT drawn yesterday and my NT scan today.  It was SO AMAZING to see two fully formed babies in there.  I have posterior placentas on both, so I do think the little taps I've been feeling are the babies.  Helped that "A" gave me a little thump during the ultrasound and it correlated to a little jump on the screen too.  I believe it now.    I see my OB next week for a routine follow-up.  I'm having my glucose, Hgb A1C, and TSH drawn in a few weeks.  I don't FEEL like I have gestational diabetes (it made me really sick with my daughter), but I can't imagine I'll escape it with twins after needing insulin at week 17 with a singleton.  

Rants/Raves/Questions:  I just want my immune system to kick in again soon!  GRR!!

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...
What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP?  I adore that I hit the lottery with my hubby.  He was totally worth the wait (we met when I was 36).  He is the most caring guy I've ever met.  He will go out of his way to do little gestures for me to brighten my day.  One example, I'm craving orange juice and I adore the specific kind of orange juice that Starbucks carries for $4 per small bottle.  It tastes like oranges.  YUM!  Anyway, more often than not, he stops on his way home to get me a bottle.  He's just a total sweetie!  I love him...
What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)?  He's so good with our daughter.  Way more patient than I am.  He lets her crawl all over him and do his hair.  He's just a really good girl dad.  I love to see them cuddled on the couch at the end of the day.  

@CarrieandRoy - it's tough to not know what will come with your post-pregnancy body.  Just know, it won't be the same, but it can be similar.  I was going to just wait till after my second to lose the extra flab, but then I ended up needing IVF and had to get to a certain weight.  I was pretty surprised at how well my body got the weight off when it needed to!

redheadbride15 - I know how you feel.  We had our first two weeks before our first anniversary and now, we'll be married four years and have THREE kids.  After being alone for so long, it's an adjustment for both of us.  But, we're growing together and learning how to do all this together.  If you have the right partner, you can just enjoy the ride!

To all, I do NOT want to pin any of my issues on anyone else, but I just want to say don't wait!!!  I stopped breastfeeding at 8 months, got my period back at 10 months, and then tried for 19 months for these babies.  Give your body time to recover and then get trying again!!  I will say this, I thought I'd be trying again at 6 months, but I was having so much fun with my daughter at that point, I didn't want to!  Good luck all.  I totally get thinking about the next one before this one is even here.  

Sporty1216

@emsmama15 --hooray for a great appointment and feeling the babies! I can't wait for that!

@createillumination--I meant to say earlier that I'm thrilled that your appointment went well and that you got to finally see baby!

re: breastfeeding and periods--I exclusively breastfed and mine still came back at 8 weeks. So you just never know! I hope it stays away longer for me this time!

also, I was too chicken to share my blump last week, but feel braver today. My body seems to know what is coming. The blump was not this big at 11.5 weeks last time! (Also, I'm mobile, so we'll see how the image works or not)

BernieRae

How far along are you? 9 weeks 3 days
What is you EDD? 9/27

How are you feeling? I feel good when I'm eating so I eat a lot and then feel full and sick. I think next week I'll buy some larger bras. It's time. I googled "pregnancy rage" earlier this week after yelling at my husband like a bratty teenager.

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?) Scan on Monday with RE and then appt at OB's with NP on Tuesday. @Sporty1216 I'm wishing the weekend away a bit too!

Rants/Raves/Questions: We had an out of town guest last night and she brought me English Toffee. Come back anytime

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...

@createillumination THANK YOU for this question! When I feel off/sick/etc I just want to be in my own space and don't want to be touched at all. This, and my hormonal grumpiness has meant not much quality time together. I know our relationship needs to be a priority so reflecting on what I love about him is a good start.

What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP? I'm way too content with the same old same old. DH moves us forward and makes sure we have adventures. 
What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)? He's great with our dog. Hope that means something

lillebowski23

I love reading everyone's check ins! @mthoomom we found out the sex at the Panorama: we're having a girl!

@Sporty1216 cute bump and footsies!

@redheadbride15 If you and your family move closer to Braintree, I'd love to train you! (Especially after we settle in with our LO!) It also helps if you are over 75 since that is typically my demograhic.

Also, I started workout routine thread if anyone else wants to share what they have done. I know we'd had a couple of threads talking about physical activity, I wanted something a little more specific

BernieRae

@redheadbride15 - good luck with the house hunting! Are you obsessed with the Redfin app yet? We purchased our first home about a year and half ago in a very competitive market. It was hard work! We had full priced offers completely ignored. It sounds cheesy, but we wrote a letter to the sellers of our home and I think that helped. Although we also wrote letters to the sellers of other houses and that didn't work, so who knows!  I love our house and city, but schools are terrible here too in the neighborhoods that we can afford. I wasn't willing to consider schools at the time because I didn't know if a child would really come along. Not sure what we'll end up doing...  

gemini2005

How far along are you? 
28 weeks

What is you EDD?
May 20, 2016

How are you feeling?
Pretty good most days but still suffering from insomnia often.  I feel heavy and slow but I'm in full-blown nesting mode so I've gotten tons of things done.  DH is building a wall across our bedroom to give the new baby her own room.  I can't wait to start decorations and putting the nursery together.  It should be done by Sunday.

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?)
I passed my glucose test with flying colors but my thyroid numbers are still low despite the increase in meds.  I'm not sure if they will ever get regulated at this point.  My next appointment is at 30 weeks and hopefully I will get an appointment for a growth scan after that.

Rants/raves/questions:
I am still trying to find time to read the hypnobirthing birth and listen to the CD.  I'm not sure if it will be helpful but I feel like I should give it a chance.  I really want to have a natural birth and experience a non-medicated labor.  I was induced these past two times so hopefully I can avoid that too.

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...
What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP? 
I am always blown away by how intelligent DH is.  He is so detail-oriented and always gives everything his best.  I'm the total opposite (artsy, messy, bad with money lol) so I fully appreciate him!
What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)?
i think it's amazing how DH engages the kids in their own made up games.  He loves to spend time with them and they adore him.

carrieandr

@emgee27 it gives me hope that you've been sleeping puddle-of-drool good. I've been having trouble lately with aches, pains and my awkward growing belly, so I was worried that would only get worse. Fingers crossed that my drool puddle will come!

tiffanyhr

Just catching up on all the check ins! Hope everyone had a good week! 

How far along are you?  12 wks 4 days

What is your EDD? 9/6

How are you feeling?  Starting to get some energy back but this week DS got a pretty bad cough and hasn't been sleeping much...there goes that energy! 

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?)  doc said I can stop with the progesterone suppositories! Yay! nothing else going on till my 14 wk appointment. 

Rants/Raves/Questions:  Ok so this is a little scary...I'm a teacher at a middle school and recently a student (not one of mine) has been making death threats against one of the teachers and some of his fellow students. He brags about what a great shooter he is and how he goes to the range on the weekends. He has a history of making threats and episodes of depression. Admins haven't done much about it in the past but this time the police are involved. We teachers are terrified they're going to let him come back to school and many are saying if he comes back then they will call out sick. I'm freaking out because I'm pregnant and teach a class across the hall from this kid. WTF does it take to keep a kid like this out of our school??

GTKY: What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP?  What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)?

DH is a saint. Always thinks of others before himself and always does the right thing. We are very different personalities but see eye to eye on core values and how to raise kids. Neither of us are "newborn people", but I've seen him grow into being the best dad ever of our toddler/now preschooler. 

@redheadbride15 - house hunting can be both fun and stressful! Think about the major things you must have and separate them from things you could do without (for now). Don't let anyone convince you to settle on something you're not completely comfortable with!

@sporty1216 - love that bump! 

Mamafesto

How far along are you? 14w (yay for 2nd tri!)
What is you EDD? 8/24-8/28 ish

How are you feeling? Great, other than a bum knee from slamming it into the coffee table. It's getting slowly better with icing, taping and rest, but it means I can't start going to my prenantal yoga class which I loved last time and have to keep my walking at a minimum right now.

Any baby news (tests results/scans/upcoming appointments?) Nothing since the awesome news that baby is chromosomally normal! Next appt is in 2.5 weeks for my regular midwife check up and doppler. We'll schedule the anatomy scan then.

Rants/Raves/Questions: DS is turing 3 this coming week and I am feeling really emotional about how quickly he's grown up. It's such a good reminder to savor every moment with your babies because you blink and before you know it they're a walking, talking, (somewhat) independent human. It's so bittersweet...

GTKY: We all know that our partners can be a little clueless at times, especially if they are a man who has never experienced pregnancy hormones. BUT...
What is something you adore about your DH/SO/DP?
How affectionate he is. There is not a day that has gone by in our 14+ years together that he has not told me how much he loves me and how beautiful I am. And also, that he makes me laugh every day. I can't stay mad at him longer than a few minutes before he has me cracking a smile over something silly he says.

What do you think will make them a great parent (or why are they already a great parent)?
DP is an amazing father. I never really wanted children and over our years together, despite the fact that DP always said he was supportive of my choice to not have kids even though he had always wanted them, I just thought more and more about how tragic it would be for this man not to get the opportunity to be a father. I was completely right. He is a partner in every sense of the word when it comes to child rearing and I seriously could not do it without him. I also love that he regularly hugs, kisses and tells DS how much he loves him. My father rarely showed me affection when I was little and I could count on one hand the times he told me he loved me. I'm glad that my son will never question how much he's loved by both of his parents.

@redheadbride15, my DP is definitely the permissive, laid back parent, whereas I am the hard-a$$, so I'm definitely with you on the good cop/bad cop thing. It works though, because we're a united front and back each other up! Good luck with the house hunt, it's so easy to obsess over...

@createillumination, so glad to hear your scan went well! It's such a relief and makes it so much more tangible to see the LO wiggling away.

@gemini2005, I hear great things about hypnobirthing, although I didn't look into it with my DS. I read some Ina May Gaskin that was filled with really empowering stories about natural childbirth experiences. I also read Birthing from Within. What I took away from my reading was to do what felt right for my body and to imagine letting go and opening up with each contraction. Luckily, it worked for me and I had a very empowering experience that I will cherish for the rest of my life! It also helped to have an incredible doula that was also a masseuse (I had back labor and she massaged me basically through the entire labor).

@CarrieandRoy, your anxiety about the changes your body is going through are totally normal. PP have already given you really good advice, but I would just add that it's not a definite that you'll be flabby, stretch-marked, and saggy postpartum. For example, stretch marks are hereditary and not every one gets them. Also, you may very well be one of those women whose bodies bounce right back with breast-feeding. I was lucky enough to get away with no stretch marking and got down to pre-pregnancy weight quickly. However, I unexpectedly ended up with rather smaller boobs than I started out with before breastfeeding. They were like saggy little pouches for a while right after I stopped bf (thankfully, they filled out a little after, but still were a cup size smaller and I wasn't big to begin with). Anyway, the point is, no use stressing about it now, you just never know what you'll get at the end of this journey, but it is all worth it in the end!

@Sporty1216, good luck with your appointment on Monday! Love the bump!

lickastick

@Sporty1216 Cute cute bump! I love that you are wearing your LO! I'm a bit further behind as a FTM but I can't wait until I can share. 

@tiffanyhr holy sh%$ that is so scary! I am sorry that that is happening right there so close to you, you must be terrified! While ultimately the school and the boy's parents should really be taking responsibility for the situation, you still have to be protected. I know it might seem small but what I would do is use a mantra that revolves around peace every time I felt fear about the situation, or saw the kid, or was worried while in my room across the hall. Something like: "peace begins with me" or "I am the peace within" or "I am willing to see peace instead of this." 

I like to think it works like this...have you ever seen someone you know and DON'T want to talk to and the only thing you are thinking in your head is "please don't look over hear," "please don't see me," "I don't want to talk to you" or something to that effect? And what usually happens in that situation...the person looks right at you and strolls on over. It's like the strongest feeling we have is what we are attracting in our little private universe. They call this the law of attraction (if you have ever heard of it.) So according to the law of attracting, if your strongest feeling in the situation is a feeling of peace maybe it can offer you a slightly stronger protection then if your primary feeling is something else. It's like magnetizing the peace towards you (and baby) and giving you that extra buffer between you and this crazy crazy world. 

I have had such great results from using this technique in my own life. I used to complain ALL-THE-TIME and I was always getting the crankiest bank teller, the worst seat on the plane, things were always wrong because that's all I ever talked about and knew to expect. Slowly slowly over time and re-thinking my world, things have shifted so much for the better. Now I'm the person getting the free upgrade and the nicest people to help me (except when I am talking to my health insurance- still working on that one- ha!) 

Of course no one in your school should have to experience gun violence, just like no being anywhere should have to.  Everyday in my meditation I pray that each person on this planet will experience inner peace and true happiness. I've come to learn that peace does begin with me, and my little piece of the world is where I can exert the most influence and it spirals outwards in everyone that I come in contact with. I tell my LO in my uterus all the time that peace begins with me, and I only hope my LO will have to do even less work then I did to surpass the limitations of negative thinking.  

I serious hope this gets resolved before anything happens, and listen to your gut! Take care of you and LO!

jilligan14

@tiffanyhr - OMG, this sounds so scary! Definitely protect yourself and do what it takes to stay safe. Hopefully this kid won't be allowed back into school anytime soon.

@CarrieandRoy - I'm feeling some similar feelings to you. I've never been overweight in my life and have always been super active. In fact, my job depends on me staying fit (being able to climb fabrics, flip in the air, etc.). I also plan on trying for another baby soon after this one (I'll be almost 37 when I deliver). I feel like my whole world is changing and I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever perform again...I may never have the time to get that level of fitness back after a couple of pregnancies and running around after small humans. I know there are sacrifices that need to happen once you become a parent, part of me is okay with this, but another part of me is sad for the life I'm leaving behind. I have no idea what my body will be like, feel like, look like, etc. after this birth (and future ones) and already I feel like so much change has occurred. I'm trying to embrace these new changes to the best of my ability, by slowing down a bit, being more nurturing to myself, rubbing coconut oil over my expanding belly, thinking about how fulfilling having a family will be, etc. But it is hard. There's just so much change happening and the baby isn't even here yet! It's reassuring to know that I'm not the only one feeling like this.

It's so great reading everyone's updates! I love being a part of this group so much!!

And on to my update...

I'm 16 weeks, 2 days!

EDD is 8/10 based on LMP, 8/11 based on ovulation

Feeling pretty good! Still get some bouts of nausea, some headaches, a bit of cramping here and there, but my appetite is back, I have more energy and am feeling more like myself these days.

Next OB visit is March 4. Can't wait to hear that heartbeat again!

Rant: I'm doing our taxes (both DH and I are self-employed) and it's soooooo time consuming! Plus DH is like the absent-minded professor and leaves his stuff strewn all over the office. I can't find anything important and went digging through his desk and found unopened statements from 2013!! I got so upset and told him he's no longer allowed to touch any kind of statement or bill - they all have to go to me directly. Sometimes the mess and clutter just really gets to me. ARGH!

Okay, now that I got that rant out of my system I can say what I DO like about my DH....He's a wonderful cook and is always trying to come up with perfect meals and treats for me to eat (I have a lot of food allergies so it's a challenge). He's also been so wonderful with helping satisfy my cravings. I wanted blueberry muffins the other night and within an hour, poof - there they were! He makes me breakfast pretty much every morning (I'm not that best in the morning so this is the only way to guarantee that I actually eat!) and is just a real sweetie. I don't know what I would do without him.

I know he's going to be a great dad because he's already singing little songs to the bean and gets all teary-eyed whenever he sees him bouncing away on the ultrasound screen. He's wanted kids for such a long time (so have I) and it's so incredible to see this dream finally unfolding. At our last ultrasound appointment he said to the technician, "This is by far the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me." The technician looked confused and said, "Oh?" to which DH replied, "Yeah. Growing a baby for me." It was so precious.

carrieandr

@tiffanyhr that's frightening! I hope he doesn't come back!

@jilligan14 It's comforting to know I'm not the only one feeling this way. The thought of looking in the mirror and not recognizing myself is scary. This is the me that I've known forever. Perhaps I had my unaltered adult body for too long. It's hard to part with it.

Here's a bump update:

Sporty1216

@tiffanyhr -- terrifying! I hope they keep him out of school... We have a potentially scary situation developing at my workplace too and I just keep hoping and praying that the person in question manages to never get so upset that he does something really terrifying.  But even the thought of it as a possibility makes going to work unpleasant--and it's a place I should enjoy being, really.  Anyway. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with that...

@createillumination--I keep meaning to say congrats on finding THE midwife! Woot!

@carrieandroy--LOVE that bump! So cute.

Wyattnash00

You look adorable @carrieandRoy!!

BernieRae

@tiffanyhr So sorry that you are going through that! I hope some kind of resolution can be made so that you and your coworkers can begin to feel safe. Do you have a union advocating for you that could be of help? Also hope that kid and his family get some support. Sad and scary situation

@carrieandroy - I'm sorry you've been feeling overwhelmed with all of the changes that will happen including those to your body. That  you're taking all of that into consideration and aware of what might be challenging probably puts you ahead of the game. Hopefully thinking things through now and making some goals/plans will make things a bit easier after baby arrives. I've loved hearing everyone's great advice on this. This is something I hadn't thought too much about, but now I feel a bit more prepared if I begin to have the same worries. 

carrieandr

@BernieRae your comment made me feel better too! You guys are so good at this.

carrieandr

Oh, and I wanted to clarify that the bump doesn't bother me (aside from my fear that I might have months of discomfort and trouble sleeping ahead of me). It's what I'll be left with afterward that scares me.

redheadbride15

CarrieandRoy said:

Oh, and I wanted to clarify that the bump doesn't bother me (aside from my fear that I might have months of discomfort and trouble sleeping ahead of me). It's what I'll be left with afterward that scares me.

I was scared of the discomfort too, but honestly I haven't had any at all. In fact, I feel terrific and often forget that I'm pregnant (unless baby is kicking, or if I catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror, or try to tie my shoes). Granted, it's still early (25.5 weeks) but I really thought it would have started by now. I think staying active and keeping my weight gain on the moderate end is helping a lot.