Monday Bitchfest — The Bump
January 2016 Moms

Monday Bitchfest

let it all out here 
Married 2006
DS1 2010
DS2 2013
DD1 2016

Re: Monday Bitchfest

  • Finding childcare is impossible. There are roughly 40 spots for infant care in the entire county that we live in. We are on wait lists everywhere, but they are now saying summer at the earliest. We don't live near family, so that's off the table. I'm going to try care.com, so hopefully we can find something, it's just so frustrating. 
  • @m6tonner - I totally hear you!  We've been on a couple of waiting lists for months and called to check in after LO was born - we're hearing September/October at the earliest!  :/  We may have to hire a nanny temporarily unitl a day care opens up, since there's no way I can wait that long to go back to work.

    My bitchfest for today is just sadness, really.  LO is two weeks old today and my husband is going in for his first day back at work.  Between the two of us I feel like we *finally* got into a feeding rhythm yesterday, after having such a hard time figuring out what our problems were with breastfeeding and latching and my supply, and now that we have a solid plan moving forward, he has to leave.  And he works long and odd hours, with a schedule that changes each week, so there's not much of a routine I can look forward to, as far as when he'll be home.  (And of course last night LO had one of her worst nights ever, as far as being up, being gassy, and neither of us getting much sleep, so I don't feel in the best mindset/energy level to be starting the phase where I'm on my own with her.)

    I'm going to be fine, I'm sure, but man do I wish it was normal to have a month of paternity leave.  Or even three weeks!  That extra week would really count.  DH's company gives one week paid, then he took the second week of vacation and that's really all we can do, since he needs to keep a few vacation and sick days in case LO gets sick some time once I'm back at work (I don't get any vacation or sick days with my work.)  Anyway, feeling a bit nervous and down today but trying to pump myself up and remind myself that I can do this and eventually, once things settle down a bit, I'm going to love being home by myself with LO, instead of being intimidated and scared that I'll mess something up.
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  • m6tonner said:
    Finding childcare is impossible. There are roughly 40 spots for infant care in the entire county that we live in. We are on wait lists everywhere, but they are now saying summer at the earliest. We don't live near family, so that's off the table. I'm going to try care.com, so hopefully we can find something, it's just so frustrating. 
    I had better luck overall finding an in home childcare provider (much better price, smaller environment/more attention for my baby, more flexibility). It just takes a bit of time finding one that you feel good about.
    Achae
  • @m6tonner - I totally hear you!  We've been on a couple of waiting lists for months and called to check in after LO was born - we're hearing September/October at the earliest!  :/  We may have to hire a nanny temporarily unitl a day care opens up, since there's no way I can wait that long to go back to work.

    My bitchfest for today is just sadness, really.  LO is two weeks old today and my husband is going in for his first day back at work.  Between the two of us I feel like we *finally* got into a feeding rhythm yesterday, after having such a hard time figuring out what our problems were with breastfeeding and latching and my supply, and now that we have a solid plan moving forward, he has to leave.  And he works long and odd hours, with a schedule that changes each week, so there's not much of a routine I can look forward to, as far as when he'll be home.  (And of course last night LO had one of her worst nights ever, as far as being up, being gassy, and neither of us getting much sleep, so I don't feel in the best mindset/energy level to be starting the phase where I'm on my own with her.)

    I'm going to be fine, I'm sure, but man do I wish it was normal to have a month of paternity leave.  Or even three weeks!  That extra week would really count.  DH's company gives one week paid, then he took the second week of vacation and that's really all we can do, since he needs to keep a few vacation and sick days in case LO gets sick some time once I'm back at work (I don't get any vacation or sick days with my work.)  Anyway, feeling a bit nervous and down today but trying to pump myself up and remind myself that I can do this and eventually, once things settle down a bit, I'm going to love being home by myself with LO, instead of being intimidated and scared that I'll mess something up.
    Hang in there, it will feel better! I have been alone for four weeks now (2 weeks with SO) and to be honest I've grown to enjoy just having mommy and baby time. Also, by the second week I felt like I was taking care of two Babies...workload really decreased when SO went back to work;)
    maureenmceflutterflutter
  • Mine is more sad than bitchy. This weekend I found and decided on childcare I was happy with. While this was a huge relief, I go back to work in 3 1/2 weeks and the reality just got me. I am so incredibly sad about it, I even cried about it yesterday (first post partum cry this whole time). I enjoy my job, I will get summer off (I teach), and I am comfortable with his daycare, but I just don't want to leave my baby and the thought truly makes me so sad. I am trying to figure out how to get my mind right.
  • I'm so annoyed with DH. He keeps trying to get LO to nap in the most unsafe situations. Usually propped up in a pile of pillows and blankets on the couch, sometimes on his tummy. I tell him not to, or move him once he's sleeping and he looks at me like i'm being irrational. Yes, the chances he will actually wiggle himself into a corner and suffocate are slim, but I don't want to take that risk! He said "You always assume the worst case scenario is going to happen!"... Well yea, I'm an emergency RN, I see the worst case scenario on a daily basis at work, I prefer to avoid it at home! I think the part that annoys me most is it's so simple, why fight it?

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
    Achaeflutterflutteressentialpeace
  • The Bump wants their Q&A section to be so awesome and yet every time I try to check it out I get 404 PAGE NOT FOUND. Well fine, screw your Q&A. I guess adding bold and italics to posts is more important than a functioning app? Screw off, TB.
    TRA0816melturz
  • My parents have already canceled Easter dinner this year. 
    My sons first Easter- their first Easter with a grandchild. 
    Why? 
    To take my 79 year old grandma and her sister to Florida for a family reunion.... 
    We (the kids) aren't even invited... 

    My dad said "he won't remember it anyway" 

    my grandma also guilted my mom into taking them by saying "I feel like this is going to be my last easter"
  • I'm at my wits end, because my baby won't nap. She'll take 2 maybe 3 naps that are 20-30 minutes each, and that's it. The rest of the time she needs to be held and walked around. My Fitbit has recorded the miles I walk around our kitchen island every day. By the afternoon she's exhausted and crabby, but still won't nap. Then she's miserable for my husband once he gets home. I feel awful for him, because she's always in a terrible mood for him. 
    She sleeps ok at night, so I've really been able to deal with it. But today I broke. 
    flutterflutter
  • If your vagina went back to normal after birth I'm jealous, I'm 7 weeks post delivery and at my 6 week appt was told to "take it easy another 4 weeks and if I'm still in pain make an appointment to come back in" so that's fun. 
  • I started on and off bleeding the day before my 6 week post visit... which sucks. But I'm not crampy or anything, so I have no idea if this is STILL pp bleeding, or if this is my period. But my OB doesn't want me to have BC until after my first period. 

    Let's just say, that was also the plan after my son... then 12 weeks pp, tada! Now I have kids 13 months apart. So, yeah... let's not wait, doc.
  • We had to spend the night in the hospital Saturday and all day Sunday. My boyfriend slept literally the entire time we were there. Then didn't help at all last night and slept. (Usual he never gets up) then had the nerve to give me a hard time about asking him to watch the baby so I could take a nap today. 
  • I'm still up every 2/3 hours to change and feed my girl. Sometimes I'm up with her for 2 hours because shes gassy or just completely wide awake 
    Last nite it was a 2 hour stent of fussy gassy crying and fighting sleep. After the first hour i woke hubby up to help me out. This morning he looked at me and said "that was a really rough night. I hardly slept"
    Screw you dude! You don't even know!
    Jackass slept till 9:30
    I totally feel you! I was nice enough to head to the nursery and close the door so DH could sleep last night during our 2 hour gassy fit. Then this morning at 8 when LO was awake for the day, DH looked at me like I was evil when I woke him up to take LO so I could sleep a little more. Later today, I asked why he didnt sleep well.. He didn't even know we spent 2 hours awake in the nursery... If he didnt make me a delicious dinner while I put LO to be this evening I may have slapped him.
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • BarrettJ89BarrettJ89 member
    edited February 2016
    Thank goodness it's not just my SO who is completely clueless on what it's like to be awake half the night (or more) then busting ass all day... he had the balls to tell me the other day that I wouldn't last one day at his desk job, but staying home with our littles would be "fun." This weekend I took his daughter and left him home with the littles for maybe 2 hours and he ranted and raved and full on bitched about how DS kept getting into things and intentionally caused trouble and that the baby wouldn't quit screaming. 

    No shit, Sherlock. Welcome to my every day. 
    flutterfluttermom2be2016kwentelaMamabeagle
  • I started on and off bleeding the day before my 6 week post visit... which sucks. But I'm not crampy or anything, so I have no idea if this is STILL pp bleeding, or if this is my period. But my OB doesn't want me to have BC until after my first period. 

    Let's just say, that was also the plan after my son... then 12 weeks pp, tada! Now I have kids 13 months apart. So, yeah... let's not wait, doc.
    Really? She won't give you BC until after your first period??? That seems so weird. My Dr. gave me the pill to start at 4 weeks pp. They call it the mini pill and it doesn't have estrogen so it's safe while BFing. I would talk to your doc again, especially with your 2 littles so close already.
    flutterflutterAchae
  • Cricket99 said:
    I started on and off bleeding the day before my 6 week post visit... which sucks. But I'm not crampy or anything, so I have no idea if this is STILL pp bleeding, or if this is my period. But my OB doesn't want me to have BC until after my first period. 

    Let's just say, that was also the plan after my son... then 12 weeks pp, tada! Now I have kids 13 months apart. So, yeah... let's not wait, doc.
    Really? She won't give you BC until after your first period??? That seems so weird. My Dr. gave me the pill to start at 4 weeks pp. They call it the mini pill and it doesn't have estrogen so it's safe while BFing. I would talk to your doc again, especially with your 2 littles so close already.
    Lurker from d15:) I get what she is saying... My doctor did my prescription at my 6w pp but I had to wait to start them till after I finally got my first period. She said by waiting to take them (the Sunday after your period) your body will
    be as regular as possible and my period would come closer to when it actually is supposed to. 
    She did say I could have started it that day, but the odds of a period being regular were slim to none and it could have made me a bigger emotional mess than I already was/am. 

    Theliops
  • @BarrettJ89 That sucks your OB won't let you begin the pill.  I had my 6 w PP check up weeks ago on a Friday and mine just told me to dump the first 2 pills and start on that following Sunday.  

    Also, I love when DH asks me in the mornings; "Did Griffin sleep this whole time?" No, he didn't.  I am just WAY more quiet at getting him out of the bassinet and making his feedings as quiet as can be.  I shouldn't complain, because he does get up for 1 of his 2 nightly feedings and DS doesn't usually have any issues going back down to bed, regardless if he cries or not, but COME ON! Just once, I'd like to not be woken up by the baby crying because you decided to change his diaper and then go warm up the bottle.  It makes the process extend about 5 minutes longer, which gives a nice window of opportunity for DS to lose his shit, because he's hungry. 
    Hipshaker
  • Oh my gosh, I'm right with you girlfriend. Dad's okay during the day but come midnight feedings, he can't be bothered. His is excuse is always, well he's yours. You wanted him, so I gave him to you. The worst part is hearing him on the phone with his buddies talking about how raising a baby is so tiring, ugh!!! Really, when does mom get to sleep??
  • Cricket99 said:
    I started on and off bleeding the day before my 6 week post visit... which sucks. But I'm not crampy or anything, so I have no idea if this is STILL pp bleeding, or if this is my period. But my OB doesn't want me to have BC until after my first period. 

    Let's just say, that was also the plan after my son... then 12 weeks pp, tada! Now I have kids 13 months apart. So, yeah... let's not wait, doc.
    Really? She won't give you BC until after your first period??? That seems so weird. My Dr. gave me the pill to start at 4 weeks pp. They call it the mini pill and it doesn't have estrogen so it's safe while BFing. I would talk to your doc again, especially with your 2 littles so close already.
    I didn't have my first period after DD for 9 months. I'd be looking into an alternative bc if you can't start the pill now. 
  • I'm wondering if it's different because I'm going for an IUD (Mirena)? Sorry, forgot that detail. I told him I'm pretty against the pill because doing anything at the same time daily is absolutely setting me up for failure. I'm lucky if I remember to take my daily medication at all, let alone the same time. Hell, I can't even remember what day of the week it is! I'm a sleep deprived, mentally exhausted, hot mess these days ;)
    kwentelaapinkpelican
  • Jessdub10Jessdub10 member
    edited February 2016
    Ah, that does seem weird esp. for an IUD because it's not like a pill that you would take according to your cycle... I'm scheduled to have the copper IUD done at my 6 week pp appt. period or not. My Dr. also offered the mini pill at my 4 week pp appt. to use until then, but I declined because there is no way I trust myself to take it at the same time every day.
    Eta - sure it's Tuesday, but yes to all the above about husbands thinking they are not getting enough sleep - I've been getting 3-5 hrs total here and there, plus somehow I'm supposed to put two kids to bed at the same time? Meanwhile dh is obliviously crashed on the couch...
    Hipshaker
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