Anyone Plan on NOT BFing?

JamieK1882

Another early discussion, but something that has been weighing on my mind.

With DD I went into the BFing journey with the attitude of I wanted to do it, and would give it my best shot, but if for some reason it didn't work out, I wouldn't beat myself up. Well, it was hard, much harder than I expected, but I was determined to give it my best. I ended up EPing for 3 months, and she ended up on breastmilk for 4 months before we switched to formula. I HATED EPing, and I had absolutely awful, recurrent clogged ducts. Like, I'm talking 2-3 week. I never developed mastitis, thankfully, but the whole experience was horrible. I ended when I was pumping once and noticed the whole bottle was filled with blood from my cracked nipple. That was the end for me.

Anyways, I'm really struggling if with whether or not I'll try again with the second. Part of me wants to, for health reasons and because I feel like I did it with DD and this LO deserves the same. However, I'm worried if I have to end up pumping again, how that will work with a LO running around. I really felt being hooked to the pump damaged some of my bonding time with her. Also, my job is not conducive to pumping, so either way I would probably quit/wean around 3 months when I return to work.

Wondering what others are planning to do....

cbamama641

Just a thought- when I had my daughter I bought a manual pump because that seemed like it would be easier to use with two wild little boys running around plus a baby! I was never stuck in one spot to pump and it was a lot quicker and easier to use than my electric pump.  In fact, I just stick with my manual pump all together and pumped until she was about 10 months old! Good luck with whatever you decide! Just feed your baby!

jeng100

I hated bfing the first time around. I had some pretty bad PPD and the stress I put on myself to bf for a year made it so much worse than it needed to be. With that said, this time I'm going into it telling myself that I will bf for as long as is comfortable. But I'm not giving myself a timeline like I did last time. 

br0co1ii

My plan is definitely to BF, but plans don't always work out. I totally understand your concerns, and don't really have much advice. Just that i wish all of us the best of luck, and hope we all have well fed, happy babies no matter how it gets done. 
Hopefully some of the other ladies have a few tips!

JamieK1882

cbamama641 said:

Just a thought- when I had my daughter I bought a manual pump because that seemed like it would be easier to use with two wild little boys running around plus a baby! I was never stuck in one spot to pump and it was a lot quicker and easier to use than my electric pump.  In fact, I just stick with my manual pump all together and pumped until she was about 10 months old! Good luck with whatever you decide! Just feed your baby!

I rented the hospital grade pump, had a Medela pump I got through insurance, AND a hand pump to use at work. I got clogged ducts with all 3, and the only way to clear them was when I could actually get baby to BF. Actually, it was the hand pump that did my nipple in, so now I'm a little scared of it haha.

PrimRoseMama

JamieK1882 said:

Another early discussion, but something that has been weighing on my mind.

With DD I went into the BFing journey with the attitude of I wanted to do it, and would give it my best shot, but if for some reason it didn't work out, I wouldn't beat myself up. Well, it was hard, much harder than I expected, but I was determined to give it my best. I ended up EPing for 3 months, and she ended up on breastmilk for 4 months before we switched to formula. I HATED EPing, and I had absolutely awful, recurrent clogged ducts. Like, I'm talking 2-3 week. I never developed mastitis, thankfully, but the whole experience was horrible. I ended when I was pumping once and noticed the whole bottle was filled with blood from my cracked nipple. That was the end for me.

Anyways, I'm really struggling if with whether or not I'll try again with the second. Part of me wants to, for health reasons and because I feel like I did it with DD and this LO deserves the same. However, I'm worried if I have to end up pumping again, how that will work with a LO running around. I really felt being hooked to the pump damaged some of my bonding time with her. Also, my job is not conducive to pumping, so either way I would probably quit/wean around 3 months when I return to work.

Wondering what others are planning to do....

I plan on EBF, but like you my first experience with BF didn't go well. We made it 4 months before my supply went completely boom. I tried EVERYTHING. Power pumping, supplements, all the tinctures, teas, lactation cookies. Water until I almost threw up. I was bound and determined not to "fail". I decided enough was enough when the sheer anxiety of feeding my child made me jump when she cried to eat. My husband basically said he was worried about my mental state at that time and my OB/midwives all said happy mom = happy baby. SO, no judgment here. I support and help all BF moms if they ask me. I support and help all FF moms or any combination of the two. Feed the baby, y'all.

My second experience went like a dream. So I'm hoping this third experience will go just as well. I am also with you that I really don't like pumping. If this baby has latching issues I might choose to EP but I don't know. Having two other kids to chase around makes that idea seem very unpleasant. So if I'm going to bottle feed I'd rather do it with formula, BUT since my 2 year old is still nursing and my supply seems to come in well. I might just see if I can EP if there are latch issues.

At the moment its a little bit overwhelming to try to make that decision right now. For the record, I am team #JUSTFEEDTHEBABYFORTHELOVEOFGOD. Formula or breast milk-- whatever makes the baby full and happy and fat. :P

JamieK1882

@primrosemama thanks. I'm team #feedthebaby too. I'm sure I'll switch my mind a few times before October, but the circumcision thread made me want to post. We still have some formula in the house that will be in-date when baby is born, so that is tempting...we shall see!

CopperBoom86

This will be my first and I am planning on trying. However, I'm completely terrified. 

I've always had extra sensitive boobs and nips. I'm thinking I probably won't last for long, but with all the benefits it brings, I want to at least give it a go.

And I've had several friends say they prefer a manual pump, and it allows for more freedom, so you might try that.

PrimRoseMama

JamieK1882 said:

@primrosemama thanks. I'm team #feedthebaby too. I'm sure I'll switch my mind a few times before October, but the circumcision thread made me want to post. We still have some formula in the house that will be in-date when baby is born, so that is tempting...we shall see!

Basically the only thing I say if you want to BF and baby has no l latch issues-- is that the first three months are VITAL to supply building. So I'm not against formula here and there, but you have to make sure you pump to simulate a session on the breast. So, I tell my friends in the beginning with BF-- try (key word try) not do formula for the first three months and THEN decide if you want to continue. Usually by three months into BF you will know how you feel and whether or not you want to continue.

I've done both, but I realize the first time around I didn't "give myself a chance" to commit to BF and build supply properly like I should have. That complicated matters too.

Basically, you need help and support with BF and with FF. So, I'm here if anyone wants help or encouragement either way.

gherkins

I plan to breastfeed.
Breastfeeding is HARD. But it is totally worth it if it's what you want. My daughter was a preemie and we had to exclusively pump for two months before she ever latched on. And from there it was still a struggle, as she was so little and used to a bottle that it was incredibly painful. It was worth it though. I'm convinced that BFing helped us bond in a way we weren't able to because of her early arrival. One of the most important factors for us was support. If you don't have a good support system, it makes it a million times harder. We saw a lactation consultant weekly from the day she was born until she was probably four months old. We go to a BF support group. And I educated myself extensively. 
That being said, she did have some formula. And now that I'm pregnant my supply has dropped and another mommy on our BF support group has given us almost 200oz to use at our leisure. Do what you have to do. In our case, the benefits outweighed the risks. But we had special circumstances with a preemie, and I am a stay at home mom, so I could pump when I needed to. ❤️ We're so lucky to live in a place and time where you don't have to breastfeed to keep our littles healthy! 

freckledlemonade

Oh my gosh, I could've written this post!  I had a very similar outlook with my first, that I would give it a try and if it didn't work out then so be it.  Well, post pregnancy hormones have a different idea and when I struggled I really had a hard time telling myself enough was enough.  I was worried people would judge me for stopping, I felt like a failure, and it was a really dark cloud over what was otherwise an amazing time in my life.  Lactation consultants and nurses really added to that stress and were a big part of why I really beat myself up over it.  Some LCs are great, but some really don't take the new mother's well being into account, and I've had multiple friends echo this sentiment.

I've given it a lot of thought over the past couple years, and I think I'm just going straight to ff this time around.  It's not worth the stress for me personally during what is going to already be a stressful time adding a new little person into our family.  I'm totally at peace with it, and anyone else (nurses, OB, family, etc) who disagrees with me when the time comes can suck it.  You do what's best for you, and if that's bf-ing great.  If it's ff, that's great too.

ETA: also want to be clear that this was MY experience with bf-ing, and don't want to add to the nerves of FTMs who plan to bf.  Plenty of people love it and have a great experience.  I was not one of those people, and I feel like nowadays there is a lot of pressure for moms to bf and formula is made out to be the McDonald's of baby feeding.  In hindsight I wish I wouldn't have cared so much about what others thought about how I fed my baby.

LizaKate1213

I plan to breastfeed and did with my son but I am with @PrimRoseMama on this one. I am team #feedthebabyhoweveryoudamnwellpleaseaslongasyoufeedthebaby

Kaytee1087

gherkins said:

❤️ We're so lucky to live in a place and time where you don't have to breastfeed to keep our littles healthy! 

I love that sentiment! It IS a great time that we live in that our babies can eat regardless of our ability/want to be able to BF.

I pretty much EP'ed with DD. She was a preemie and I was (am) working full time, so I felt like I was spending all my time with latching issues and worrying if she was eating enough, so I just pumped and bottle fed. It seemed like our best compromise and worked well until I went back on birth control; it TANKED my supply. Even after I changed BC types, my supply never fully recovered so we went to formula much earlier than I expected.

Knowing what I know now, I hope to do a good mix of BF/pumping and FX I can keep up my supply this time.

I echo the other ladies when I say do what you need to do to feed your baby. That's the important part!

itravelsize

I love hearing that everyone seems to be on team #justfeedthebaby. Most the newer moms I know BF and when my answer is we will give it a go and see what happens I always feel like I get the stink eye. It's not that I don't wish to BF but I know it's hard and my sister had to give up after a month or so with latching issues and bleeding nipples. I know I don't want to beat my self up if it doesn't happen but lately it seems like there is a lot of media attention on why we shouldn't shame BF while at the same time we are starting to shame FF moms. I think we all do what's best for our baby's and our selfs and as long as baby is growing who care how they feed.

Sally1990

I would like to bf but I'm sure I'll end of ffing. I ff my first two, I tried to pump with my 2nd and It was so upsetting bc it was like less than 1cc after trying and trying. So I might try to bf but I'm not sure. I loved ffing my girls! 

freckledlemonade

itravelsize said:

I love hearing that everyone seems to be on team #justfeedthebaby. Most the newer moms I know BF and when my answer is we will give it a go and see what happens I always feel like I get the stink eye. It's not that I don't wish to BF but I know it's hard and my sister had to give up after a month or so with latching issues and bleeding nipples. I know I don't want to beat my self up if it doesn't happen but lately it seems like there is a lot of media attention on why we shouldn't shame BF while at the same time we are starting to shame FF moms. I think we all do what's best for our baby's and our selfs and as long as baby is growing who care how they feed.

Agree 100%. 

kmalls

I tried BFing for two horrible, painful months with DS. Turned out I have faulty nipples (they're flat, so there's nothing for baby to latch onto) so I was forced to use a nipple shield -- which for me is the most frustrating, anxiety-inducing contraption ever invented. I ended up exclusively pumping, but after a few weeks my supply completely dried up. Switching to formula was the most emotional decision I made in those early months, mostly because of the intense pressure put on new moms to breastfeed. I will say, though, that once I made the decision to switch to formula -- and forgave myself for it -- I was a WAY happier mom than I had been up to that point. You gotta do what's best you and your family, haters be damned. 

This is time around I intend to EP for as long as possible, then switch to formula when and if I have to. And this time I won't give a single fuck what anyone has to say

klv

I had a similar outlook with my first. BF is hard! My daughter struggled to get the hang of it and by the time we thought there may be a problem she was FTT at 2 months old. Didn't I feel awful!  We started supplementing and as she grew stronger she figured it out, but my supply was gone. I was able to BF until she was 6 months with supplementing. 

I am going to try to BF again but being a teacher it will be hard to find time to pump at work. 

thepicklemonster

This will be my first so I have no idea how it's all gonna go down.  I'll try to BF but I have a feeling I will lose patience and give up pretty quickly.  Maybe I'll love it and it will go smoothly, who knows, but I can see myself hating it. Will try not to sweat it.  I was formula fed and turned out pretty awesome, IMO 

krzyriver

This will be my only child, so I would like to BF. But I have weird nipples that don't really get hard..... and a girlfriend of mine said hers are like that and she had a very difficult time BFing. So I'm not sure how that'll work....

ashleyp625

I am not sure yet. I know that it is very beneficial for baby, but I'm not super committed to it. Mostly because I only get 6 weeks off from work, and I can't see pumping going well with my teaching schedule. We will see how things go. 

dobbyisfree

I'm. Still. Breastfeeding. I was expecting him to stop many times. When I stopped pumping at work. When I went on nutrisystem and cut my calories. When he started eating a lot. Nope nope nope. Milk. All the time. 3 long feeds and then lots of wanting a sip and yelling while moving my clothes. He's 19 months. I feel bad forcing him to wean, because I know how good it is for him, but I wish he would just decide he was over it.

artcheese

Breast feeding is hard. The biggest thing that helps make breast feeding successful is a engaged and supportive partner.

For all the new moms that are thinking they want to breast feed, please sign up for a class on it and have your partners join.

I really don't enjoy breast feeding that much and luckily didn't have too hard of a time with it. One thing is, it is sooo convenient. You don't have to worry about bottles and formula when traveling/ day excursions. As long as you are there, your babies food is there. 

Now I have to always make sure my diaper bag has random snacks in it should my son go in to Hangry mode.

UponAStar16

I would like to BF but would gladly supplement and/or switch to formula if that is the better choice. I get the benefits of both sides but, at the risk of sounding completely immature, some breastfeeding stories sound like it can be pretty horrific. I guess I just haven't read far enough in these magical books, and my friends' "breast is best"-type posts omit any mention of cracked and bleeding nipples...

krzyriver

@UponAStar16 I hear coconut oil really helps with the nipple issues. My friend went thru hell with her first, refused to breast feed her second. But she bought coconut oil to breast feed her third and never had any problems

kaimee072712

I am definitely not. Because I cant. Long story short I had a bilateral mastectomy in my 20's. I felt really guilty when I had my son but had to realize that Had I not  gone through with the surgery me nor my son would be here now. My son is a normal 3.5 year old. There would be nothing different about him had I could breast fed him. 

nsquaredlife13

For those of you who are flat out just not wanting to do it... is it something you'd at least consider trying? I definitely agree that fed is best, and even if it's only for a few weeks, breast milk pretty amazing for your little loves. I was not sure I'd want to do it for more than 3 months, but once we got into our groove, I never wanted to stop. I'm going on 14 months EBF with my little guy, and while we've had our shares of ups and downs, it's mostly been ups. I also have had to wear a nipple shield 100% of the time (never had to deal with cracked nipples--yay!) and I work full time so I've had to pump. It's work, but I love it. I'm dreading the day I won't BF my little guy, and now Number Two.

Again, you have to do what is best for you and your family. Most important is that your baby is fed and healthy. Just wanted to throw my $0.02 out there for whatever it's worth.

coffee89

On the fence. With DS he had a bad latch, and had horrible reflux and allergies. It seemed like every time we fixed one issue another popped up. I was eliminating foods out of my diet so fast that it was killing my supply. Around 3 or 4 months I decided I was done crying and being puked on and started a long formula journey. (One that led to 9 different feeding combos before settling on one that he was on until 18 months).

I'll try with this baby, but I'm not going to hurt me or my child if they have the same problems that DS did (and likely they will). I went through a lot of depression during BF and after quitting because our journey was so rough, but a fed happy baby is best.

gherkins

For those of you who "want to try," you should definitely sign up for a BF class before baby comes and push hard for immediate skin to skin for at least an hour when baby is born (this is possible with c-sections too!). A good support team is very important, but if a nurse is trying to help you and you're still not getting it, ask for a certified lactation consultant. I know SO many nurses who think they give great advice, but it doesn't help or is contradictory to what a IBCLC would say. Not everyone has problems, and it seems like a lot of first time moms think they do. It can be hard. But it isn't always hard. Especially if you educate yourself and have a healthy baby. And the health benefits are really innumerable. 
For those of you who don't want to try or can't. I'm so glad we have formula and donor milk available to keep your babies fed! Having a healthy baby is what's most important, and don't let others get to you. A sane mommy is more important than a zombie mommy who can't even interact with their babe.
Feed the babies. Boobs or bottles or both. 
I am proud of my BF journey with my first. It was hard. But it was worth it for us. She had some formula and donor milk along the way. She went on a nursing strike at 9mo and never went back to the breast. I pump for her and put it in a sippy now at 11 months. But I decided it was important to ME for her to have that milk. And if it's important to anyone else, I want them to know it CAN (in almost all cases) be done. 

emmaaa

Since this is my first, I don't know what is going to work for me. I plan to and would like to BF. However, I know some women struggle with it and I don't want to put too much stress on myself along with everything else that comes with a new baby.

_darth

Depends if my RA needs active management after the baby is born. If it does, the damage to me from delaying treatment far outweighs any benefits my baby would get from BF. Honestly, I am not too stressed about it. Formula is excellent these days. 

kmtz89

I plan to BF. Formula is about $15 a can here which will break the bank quick. The infant/toddler orphanage I work at has a homemade formula recipe but we don't switch the babies to that until about 3 months. 
I'm also hoping that if BFing goes well for me I will be able to supplement the baby home for the preemies/low immune system. A "normal" birthweight here in Tanzania is only about 2.5 kg and so breast milk can do wonders for these little ones. 

We have had a handful of young homeless mothers stay with us while we help them get on their feet again and the size/health differences in their children from the formula fed babies we care for is crazy noticeable. I mean I'm all for just #feedthebaby but breast milk is like liquid gold, and if it's an option I am absolutely going to push to make it work.

JamieK1882

At the risk of sounding defensive, I did want to add that with my first, DH and I did take a breastfeeding class, and I had numerous LC consults. I didn't give up, which is why I ended up EPing, which for me, was miserable. The reason behind my post was to get some opinions on what to do with #2. If BFing works out,  I would love to do that, but really don't think I can do EPing again, especially with another toddler running around. I also have a fear of the recurrent clogged ducts. I was constantly in pain and miserable, and it definitely didn't help my "baby blues." (never went as far as to get diagnosed with PPD, but I definitely had some hormonal-related sadness going on which was not good)

kmalls

kmolleltz said:

I plan to BF. Formula is about $15 a can here which will break the bank quick. The infant/toddler orphanage I work at has a homemade formula recipe but we don't switch the babies to that until about 3 months. 
I'm also hoping that if BFing goes well for me I will be able to supplement the baby home for the preemies/low immune system. A "normal" birthweight here in Tanzania is only about 2.5 kg and so breast milk can do wonders for these little ones. 

We have had a handful of young homeless mothers stay with us while we help them get on their feet again and the size/health differences in their children from the formula fed babies we care for is crazy noticeable. I mean I'm all for just #feedthebaby but breast milk is like liquid gold, and if it's an option I am absolutely going to push to make it work.

It's even more expensive here in the US! $16.99/can or $38 for a box of two (larger) refills. It definitely gets expensive, fast. 

To to your other point about the effects of breastmilk on the children you see. I've written and rewritten a response to this a few times as I'm struggling with getting the right tone, but I think it comes down to this: the situation you see every day in an orphanage in Tanzania is very different from the reality of many mothers in more economically developed countries. I don't doubt for one second that breastfed babies there do have an advantage over formula fed, but I think a lot of that has to do with outside factors: access to clean water, the ability to sterilize bottles between feedings and the ability to purchase enough formula to keep baby healthy. 

I just didn't want first-time moms here to read your post and panic that if they formula feed, their baby won't be as healthy as a breastfed baby. Yes, breastmilk is liquid gold but formula can be, too. With clean water, sanitary conditions and the financial ability to provide enough formula, those babies are not at any disadvantage. 

CTRMommyof4

Absolutely will not BF. I have not breastfed any of my kids. 

kmtz89

kmalls said:

kmolleltz said:

I plan to BF. Formula is about $15 a can here which will break the bank quick. The infant/toddler orphanage I work at has a homemade formula recipe but we don't switch the babies to that until about 3 months. 
I'm also hoping that if BFing goes well for me I will be able to supplement the baby home for the preemies/low immune system. A "normal" birthweight here in Tanzania is only about 2.5 kg and so breast milk can do wonders for these little ones. 

We have had a handful of young homeless mothers stay with us while we help them get on their feet again and the size/health differences in their children from the formula fed babies we care for is crazy noticeable. I mean I'm all for just #feedthebaby but breast milk is like liquid gold, and if it's an option I am absolutely going to push to make it work.

It's even more expensive here in the US! $16.99/can or $38 for a box of two (larger) refills. It definitely gets expensive, fast. 

To to your other point about the effects of breastmilk on the children you see. I've written and rewritten a response to this a few times as I'm struggling with getting the right tone, but I think it comes down to this: the situation you see every day in an orphanage in Tanzania is very different from the reality of many mothers in more economically developed countries. I don't doubt for one second that breastfed babies there do have an advantage over formula fed, but I think a lot of that has to do with outside factors: access to clean water, the ability to sterilize bottles between feedings and the ability to purchase enough formula to keep baby healthy. 

I just didn't want first-time moms here to read your post and panic that if they formula feed, their baby won't be as healthy as a breastfed baby. Yes, breastmilk is liquid gold but formula can be, too. With clean water, sanitary conditions and the financial ability to provide enough formula, those babies are not at any disadvantage. 

I do understand that. Formula fed babies can do just fine, I get that as well. But even with our children being fed at least every 2 hours (in the first few months) up to basically whenever they are hungry (I'm taking 10 infants under 6 months to about 3-4 caregivers at any given time) the majority of them are smaller than breast fed age mates. We operate with western standard as far as cleanliness/sterilization/clean water. And eventually those babies do balance out once they start on regular food, and again I am not saying EVERY SINGLE formula fed baby is smaller, some are fat chunks, (regarding those I care for). 

What I guess I'm trying to say mostly is I am all for breast feeding. And if you can breast feed/or express you should try. There are many Tanzanian women I work with who actually think in America (or Europe) no one breast feeds! Because all the see is media that portrays formula feeding.

(Not meaning to shame formula feeders)

LGW2015

FTM here but I will definitely BF as long as I can. Obviously some people can't due to medical issues or bc of working or whatnot. But if I'm able, I absolutely will. Not bashing those who formula feed, but there are significant advantages health-wise for momma and baby to BF. Again, this is if all goes well and you're not having physical/emotional/other struggles, etc that make it worth it not to. 

JamieK1882

Idk if I'm reading too much into this, but I disrespectfully disagree with some of the statements made. Sometimes women physically can BF/express milk, but other instances may make it not the best solution for the family. As I've said before more power to those who can breastfeed, but I also don't want to see any shaming to those who choose not to.

LGW2015

@JamieK1882 I think everyone on here has been very respectful and most if not all have acknowledged that it really depends on what works best for mom, baby and family.

JamieK1882

@lgw2015 my comment wasn't aimed at your comment at all. I actually was typing at the same time as you. Yes, everyone has been respectful; however I do feel there have been some underlying tones of "well if you can, you should because it's best."

freckledlemonade

kmolleltz said:

kmalls said:

kmolleltz said:

I plan to BF. Formula is about $15 a can here which will break the bank quick. The infant/toddler orphanage I work at has a homemade formula recipe but we don't switch the babies to that until about 3 months. 
I'm also hoping that if BFing goes well for me I will be able to supplement the baby home for the preemies/low immune system. A "normal" birthweight here in Tanzania is only about 2.5 kg and so breast milk can do wonders for these little ones. 

We have had a handful of young homeless mothers stay with us while we help them get on their feet again and the size/health differences in their children from the formula fed babies we care for is crazy noticeable. I mean I'm all for just #feedthebaby but breast milk is like liquid gold, and if it's an option I am absolutely going to push to make it work.

It's even more expensive here in the US! $16.99/can or $38 for a box of two (larger) refills. It definitely gets expensive, fast. 

To to your other point about the effects of breastmilk on the children you see. I've written and rewritten a response to this a few times as I'm struggling with getting the right tone, but I think it comes down to this: the situation you see every day in an orphanage in Tanzania is very different from the reality of many mothers in more economically developed countries. I don't doubt for one second that breastfed babies there do have an advantage over formula fed, but I think a lot of that has to do with outside factors: access to clean water, the ability to sterilize bottles between feedings and the ability to purchase enough formula to keep baby healthy. 

I just didn't want first-time moms here to read your post and panic that if they formula feed, their baby won't be as healthy as a breastfed baby. Yes, breastmilk is liquid gold but formula can be, too. With clean water, sanitary conditions and the financial ability to provide enough formula, those babies are not at any disadvantage. 

I do understand that. Formula fed babies can do just fine, I get that as well. But even with our children being fed at least every 2 hours (in the first few months) up to basically whenever they are hungry (I'm taking 10 infants under 6 months to about 3-4 caregivers at any given time) the majority of them are smaller than breast fed age mates. We operate with western standard as far as cleanliness/sterilization/clean water. And eventually those babies do balance out once they start on regular food, and again I am not saying EVERY SINGLE formula fed baby is smaller, some are fat chunks, (regarding those I care for). 

What I guess I'm trying to say mostly is I am all for breast feeding. And if you can breast feed/or express you should try. There are many Tanzanian women I work with who actually think in America (or Europe) no one breast feeds! Because all the see is media that portrays formula feeding.

(Not meaning to shame formula feeders)

I get what you're saying, but I think that when you start to insinuate that breast fed babies will be healthier, it starts to touch a nerve.  I think that's where people need to be careful when having discussions about it.  I think often ff moms are made to feel like they aren't doing the best for their babies, and it just isn't true.  I also feel that often it is the opposite in the US.  I remember being on the bump with my first and many moms were having a hard time having their babies' weight gains compared to that of ff babies' gains, and often their pediatricians were recommending they supplement, when in fact sometimes breast fed babies just gain at a slower (but still healthy) weight. 

I also respectfully disagree that just because you can breast feed, you should to try.  You don't need to have a reason to not bf.  If it's not for you, then that's totally fine.  And if you want to try, that's great too!  I think often women who don't bf feel the need to rationalize it to others.  NO.  Your body, your baby.