Infertility

Dealing with a long wait

This is more a vent than anything else.  We did our stims and ER, but only ended up with a single embryo (which was a surprise because we only had 2 mature eggs after ER).  Since we only have this one shot, the wait is FOREVER.  Since we're doing FET, we're talking about a month for a wash cycle, then 6 weeks after that before they do the embryo transfer, then 2 weeks to figure out if we're pregnant (I think?), and then 3 months to ensure it actually sticks.  That's late April for knowing if it worked, and July before we know we're out of the woods.  How do people deal with this?  I feel like it's worse because I know we just have a the one shot before we have to figure out if we really want to do IVF again (we're leaning toward no).  It's a lot of pressure on me and my little Han Solo.

I guess on the plus side I'm starting a new job, so that should start distracting me... :)

Re: Dealing with a long wait

  • I'm really sorry about the waiting game. I understand a little bit as I'm in my first TWW since September. I had to do the retrieval then separate FET as well, and I hope the wait goes by as quickly as possible. I love than you called your snowflake HanSolo. Be sure to take breaks from social media and even boards like this when you feel everyone is moving forward but you. I had to do that. Keeping my fx for you!
  • The waiting is torture. Big (creepy internet) hugs!

    ***TW****MC mentioned & BFP mentioned***


    me 38 DH 39.  
    TTC#1 since July 2014
    AMH 0.1, DOR, Poor responder
    Moved to Prague, Czech Republic for IVF
    2 Natural IVF cycles, 3 full IVF cycles, 4 transfers, 1 BFP - heard heartbeat at 6w5d
    Diagnosed MMC at 9w1d on 11/30/15
    Headed back home to Colorado 12/12/15

    DE attempt in Czech Republic!! 

    March trip to Prague canceled due to Pancreatitis. :sob:
    Headed to Prague April 30
    3 different donors resulted in 1 PGS tested embryo and 1 fresh embryo
    2 embryo's transferred (from 2 different donors) on 5/10/16
    BFP on 5/15/16 at 5dp5dt
    Beta 1 = 81 at 8dp5dt, Beta 2 = 295 at 10dp5dt, Beta 3 = 891 at 12dt5dt. Beta 4 = 2114 at 14dp5dt, Beta 5 = 4916 at 16dp5dt, Beta 6 = 13252 at 19dp5dt
    Heartbeat at 6w5d 133BPM <3
    We are having a GIRL!!! Due Jan 26, 2017


    BabyFruit Ticker

    My blog: www.wearethehammitts.blogspot.com

    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
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  • I'm sorry to hear you have to wait that long.
    For me it help with a time plan, and only look at the next step.
    I hopped back from July, back to April, back to the 2WW, back to the 6weeks and focus on the cleansing process.
    Once I had reached my goal/ date from that process I would focus on the next step.
    The process doesn't get shorter, but because I only looked at the 'step' I was in, it made it easier to conquer.
    Keeping my FX.

    **********************************************************************************************************************************

    Daisypath Happy Birthday tickers Lilypie Maternity tickers



  • RipleyLV426RipleyLV426 member
    edited January 2016
    @TheLabyrinth Waiting is the worst part of all of these fertility treatments. I could take the injections, constant bloodwork/ultrasound, and the progesterone migraines and nausea, if it didn't take so damn long to find if it worked or not! Waiting 2 weeks, to just get slapped in the face by AF month after month, is one of the biggest trials I've had in my life. I tried going to support groups, but found it toxic, because everyone was as angry and jealous as I was. I needed a place to vent, but to also discuss and accept. Which is why I'm glad I found this place. I'd be scared too if I only had one embryo! But since you've hence forth named him Han Solo, and me being a die hard Star Wars fan, I KNOW it'll work! Han solo takes s**t from NO uterus! He implants and grows where damn well please! 
    *BFP and Loss Warning*

    Married 10/01/11 to my partner in crime
    TTC #1 since 01/15 
    Me: PCOS 
    3 cycles of Clomid + TI - BFN
    IUI #1 Femara + Ovidrel - BFP!!!
    MC 07/15
    IUI #2-4 Femara + Ovidrel +Crinone - BFFN >:(
    IUI #5-6 Follistim + Ovidrel + Crinone - BFFN!
      IUI #7 Follistim + Ganirelix + Ovidrel + Prometrium + Baby Aspirin - BFP! PLEASE STICK!!!
    1/25 Beta #1: 389, #2: 940! IT'S TWINS! 
    TEAM DOUBLE PINK!!!! <3
                               
      
                                     
                               
                                                      
      Pregnancy Ticker
  • @TheLabyrinth Waiting is the worst part of all of these fertility treatments. I could take the injections, constant bloodwork/ultrasound, and the progesterone migraines and nausea, if it didn't take so damn long to find if it worked or not! Waiting 2 weeks, to just get slapped in the face by AF month after month, is one of the biggest trials I've had in my life. I tried going to support groups, but found it toxic, because everyone was as angry and jealous as I was. I needed a place to vent, but to also discuss and accept. Which is why I'm glad I found this place. I'd be scared too if I only had one embryo! But since you've hence forth named him Han Solo, and me being a die hard Star Wars fan, I KNOW it'll work! Han solo takes s**t from NO uterus! He implants and grows where damn well please! 
    Oh my gosh @RipleyLV426 - you made my morning.... on so many levels. Truth about the "toxicity" of that kind of "support environment". I find online a better balance of positive and wallowing. It's important to wallow, but also important to pick ourselves back up. But Han Solo takes s**t from NO uterus... omg...dying. 

    @TheLabyrinth - I'm busy as heck and find that a good distraction, but no matter what, the wait is just plain torture... whenever I DO have a free moment... infertility is usually top of mind. I'm so happy to be moving forward, but it never seems to be fast enough. Patience.... whoooooosaaaaahhhhh (i tell myself). No words of wisdom here, just commiserating ;)

    ---
    Started TTC April 2011
    Me: 32, DH: 32
    Diagnosis: Endometriosis

    • 2012 - 3 Rounds clomid - all BFN
    • 2013 - 1 Fresh IVF with 2 day 3 embryos - BFN
    • 2014 - 1 Frozen IVF with 2 day 5 embryos - BFN
    • Took a long break, continuing trying naturally
    • Feb 2016 - Biopsy = Endo, DH sperm improved from 1% to 6% morphology
    • March 2016 - Fresh IVF cycle with acupuncture & intralipids: 20 eggs retrieved (17 mature), 7 ICSI'd fertilized, 9 naturally fertilized. 16 total embryos!
    • April 8th - 2 embryos (1ICSI and 1 Natural) transferred. (7 blastocysts frozen), April 18th - Beta = BFN
    • Sept 23rd - Lupron Depot Injection for Endo control
    • Nov 15th 2016 - Started daily Lupron Injections for upcoming FET
    • Nov 22 - Baseline US/BW - Intralipid Infusion - Start Meds for FET with immune protocol
    • Dec 16th FET transfer of 3 embryos (1 - AA, 2 - BB)
    • TW below
    • Dec 22nd - first ever bfp (very faint lines FRER & cheapie)
    • Dec 27th Beta = 192, Dec 29th Beta = 379
    • EDD - Sept 5th 2017

    - - -
    I'm a YouTube vlogger who talks about Infertility, IVF and Endometriosis. Check it out here!
    Follow along at http://liv4today.blog
    Instagram @liv4todayvlog 


  • @RipleyLV426 That was brilliant!  I also love your "One does not simply relax and get pregnant."  The number of times that people have told me their random story about how someone they knew was trying and trying and then took a month off from infertility treatments and got pregnant, makes me want to strangle them!  Since we've gone off BC 5 years ago and there certainly wasn't any "stress" early on, this advice makes my eye twitch.  Life is not a RomCom!

    I hope to stay busy and take my mind off of it.  My new job may take me to Europe, so I'm pumped!  I appreciate everyone's kind words.
  • @oxinfree @TheLabyrinth *Takes a bow* Thank you, thank you! I'll be here all weekend, try the veal! And 100% If one more person tells me to relax, I'll stab them in the face with whatever is in arms reach...I've just resorted to giving people the murder face, while in a raised voice saying "HOW SUPER AWESOME FOR THEM". It's one of those things people don't get. If you've been through it, you get it! If you haven't, you don't! Not their fault, just a fact. But that's why we are here for each other! To talk about our stress and worries....And our super weird and mean thoughts at times too. 

    *BFP and Loss Warning*

    Married 10/01/11 to my partner in crime
    TTC #1 since 01/15 
    Me: PCOS 
    3 cycles of Clomid + TI - BFN
    IUI #1 Femara + Ovidrel - BFP!!!
    MC 07/15
    IUI #2-4 Femara + Ovidrel +Crinone - BFFN >:(
    IUI #5-6 Follistim + Ovidrel + Crinone - BFFN!
      IUI #7 Follistim + Ganirelix + Ovidrel + Prometrium + Baby Aspirin - BFP! PLEASE STICK!!!
    1/25 Beta #1: 389, #2: 940! IT'S TWINS! 
    TEAM DOUBLE PINK!!!! <3
                               
      
                                     
                               
                                                      
      Pregnancy Ticker
  • But can we just punch someone just one time @RipleyLV426 ? Do we hold a get out jail free card on being an asshole at least once because of what we've been through? I have one friend who doesn't want kids so she's like the super extreme of not getting it, and will show me a newborn baby pic of people I don't know. I'm like Why are you showing me this? To remind me I suck at procreating? Wtf. Just one time I'd like to clobber her then just walk away as if no biggie or a totally normal response. I feel like I'm owed that. Haha.
    ---
    Started TTC April 2011
    Me: 32, DH: 32
    Diagnosis: Endometriosis

    • 2012 - 3 Rounds clomid - all BFN
    • 2013 - 1 Fresh IVF with 2 day 3 embryos - BFN
    • 2014 - 1 Frozen IVF with 2 day 5 embryos - BFN
    • Took a long break, continuing trying naturally
    • Feb 2016 - Biopsy = Endo, DH sperm improved from 1% to 6% morphology
    • March 2016 - Fresh IVF cycle with acupuncture & intralipids: 20 eggs retrieved (17 mature), 7 ICSI'd fertilized, 9 naturally fertilized. 16 total embryos!
    • April 8th - 2 embryos (1ICSI and 1 Natural) transferred. (7 blastocysts frozen), April 18th - Beta = BFN
    • Sept 23rd - Lupron Depot Injection for Endo control
    • Nov 15th 2016 - Started daily Lupron Injections for upcoming FET
    • Nov 22 - Baseline US/BW - Intralipid Infusion - Start Meds for FET with immune protocol
    • Dec 16th FET transfer of 3 embryos (1 - AA, 2 - BB)
    • TW below
    • Dec 22nd - first ever bfp (very faint lines FRER & cheapie)
    • Dec 27th Beta = 192, Dec 29th Beta = 379
    • EDD - Sept 5th 2017

    - - -
    I'm a YouTube vlogger who talks about Infertility, IVF and Endometriosis. Check it out here!
    Follow along at http://liv4today.blog
    Instagram @liv4todayvlog 


  • Oh I had a friend who HATES kids, and one day she decided to call me up and give her opinion on everything. AND I QUOTE!!: You know you can't drink when you're pregnant, right? You will have to get up before 10 o'clock when you have a baby (I get up around 7am usually). And I know postpartum depression runs in your family badly, but you can't take your depression meds after you have a baby, because if you don't breastfeed for the first year, the baby will get sick all the time, and that will be your fault. Tell your husband I'll move in with you both to make sure you take proper care of your baby. You just have a lot of growing up to do....All of those things she said to me in a 20 minute phone call. She tore apart every little bit of confidence I had. And THAT is why I hate people sometimes...The f**king arrogance. 
    *BFP and Loss Warning*

    Married 10/01/11 to my partner in crime
    TTC #1 since 01/15 
    Me: PCOS 
    3 cycles of Clomid + TI - BFN
    IUI #1 Femara + Ovidrel - BFP!!!
    MC 07/15
    IUI #2-4 Femara + Ovidrel +Crinone - BFFN >:(
    IUI #5-6 Follistim + Ovidrel + Crinone - BFFN!
      IUI #7 Follistim + Ganirelix + Ovidrel + Prometrium + Baby Aspirin - BFP! PLEASE STICK!!!
    1/25 Beta #1: 389, #2: 940! IT'S TWINS! 
    TEAM DOUBLE PINK!!!! <3
                               
      
                                     
                               
                                                      
      Pregnancy Ticker
  • oh my god @RipleyLV426 ... is this a good friend!? mine is too, but I've been distancing myself from her. Just not on the same wavelengths and not supportive so a one-way relationship. What's the point!?
    ---
    Started TTC April 2011
    Me: 32, DH: 32
    Diagnosis: Endometriosis

    • 2012 - 3 Rounds clomid - all BFN
    • 2013 - 1 Fresh IVF with 2 day 3 embryos - BFN
    • 2014 - 1 Frozen IVF with 2 day 5 embryos - BFN
    • Took a long break, continuing trying naturally
    • Feb 2016 - Biopsy = Endo, DH sperm improved from 1% to 6% morphology
    • March 2016 - Fresh IVF cycle with acupuncture & intralipids: 20 eggs retrieved (17 mature), 7 ICSI'd fertilized, 9 naturally fertilized. 16 total embryos!
    • April 8th - 2 embryos (1ICSI and 1 Natural) transferred. (7 blastocysts frozen), April 18th - Beta = BFN
    • Sept 23rd - Lupron Depot Injection for Endo control
    • Nov 15th 2016 - Started daily Lupron Injections for upcoming FET
    • Nov 22 - Baseline US/BW - Intralipid Infusion - Start Meds for FET with immune protocol
    • Dec 16th FET transfer of 3 embryos (1 - AA, 2 - BB)
    • TW below
    • Dec 22nd - first ever bfp (very faint lines FRER & cheapie)
    • Dec 27th Beta = 192, Dec 29th Beta = 379
    • EDD - Sept 5th 2017

    - - -
    I'm a YouTube vlogger who talks about Infertility, IVF and Endometriosis. Check it out here!
    Follow along at http://liv4today.blog
    Instagram @liv4todayvlog 


  • @oxinfree She WAS a good friend. But after that, I slowly distanced myself from her. She tries to contact me all the time, but honestly I don't want to look at her stupid face. And I think if someone isn't willing to at least try to be supportive, even if it's in their own way, then that friendship might not be worth it. It's hard dealing with friends that you've always been there for, and then when it's their turn to be supportive, the bail. 
    *BFP and Loss Warning*

    Married 10/01/11 to my partner in crime
    TTC #1 since 01/15 
    Me: PCOS 
    3 cycles of Clomid + TI - BFN
    IUI #1 Femara + Ovidrel - BFP!!!
    MC 07/15
    IUI #2-4 Femara + Ovidrel +Crinone - BFFN >:(
    IUI #5-6 Follistim + Ovidrel + Crinone - BFFN!
      IUI #7 Follistim + Ganirelix + Ovidrel + Prometrium + Baby Aspirin - BFP! PLEASE STICK!!!
    1/25 Beta #1: 389, #2: 940! IT'S TWINS! 
    TEAM DOUBLE PINK!!!! <3
                               
      
                                     
                               
                                                      
      Pregnancy Ticker
  • absolutely! @RipleyLV426 I share your sentiment exactly. I feel like I'm realizing just how one sided a lot of my relationships with friends are, or have been all these years. I feel like a lot of them liked our friendships because I was happy to be in a supportive role. But with some of those friends, now that I need the support they either don't know how to give it, don't have the capacity, or just plain don't want to. It's sad, but I have some amazing friends too, so better to invest in those friendships instead. 
    ---
    Started TTC April 2011
    Me: 32, DH: 32
    Diagnosis: Endometriosis

    • 2012 - 3 Rounds clomid - all BFN
    • 2013 - 1 Fresh IVF with 2 day 3 embryos - BFN
    • 2014 - 1 Frozen IVF with 2 day 5 embryos - BFN
    • Took a long break, continuing trying naturally
    • Feb 2016 - Biopsy = Endo, DH sperm improved from 1% to 6% morphology
    • March 2016 - Fresh IVF cycle with acupuncture & intralipids: 20 eggs retrieved (17 mature), 7 ICSI'd fertilized, 9 naturally fertilized. 16 total embryos!
    • April 8th - 2 embryos (1ICSI and 1 Natural) transferred. (7 blastocysts frozen), April 18th - Beta = BFN
    • Sept 23rd - Lupron Depot Injection for Endo control
    • Nov 15th 2016 - Started daily Lupron Injections for upcoming FET
    • Nov 22 - Baseline US/BW - Intralipid Infusion - Start Meds for FET with immune protocol
    • Dec 16th FET transfer of 3 embryos (1 - AA, 2 - BB)
    • TW below
    • Dec 22nd - first ever bfp (very faint lines FRER & cheapie)
    • Dec 27th Beta = 192, Dec 29th Beta = 379
    • EDD - Sept 5th 2017

    - - -
    I'm a YouTube vlogger who talks about Infertility, IVF and Endometriosis. Check it out here!
    Follow along at http://liv4today.blog
    Instagram @liv4todayvlog 


  • @oxinfree EXACTLY! Trials and tribulations really sort out the good and the bad.
    *BFP and Loss Warning*

    Married 10/01/11 to my partner in crime
    TTC #1 since 01/15 
    Me: PCOS 
    3 cycles of Clomid + TI - BFN
    IUI #1 Femara + Ovidrel - BFP!!!
    MC 07/15
    IUI #2-4 Femara + Ovidrel +Crinone - BFFN >:(
    IUI #5-6 Follistim + Ovidrel + Crinone - BFFN!
      IUI #7 Follistim + Ganirelix + Ovidrel + Prometrium + Baby Aspirin - BFP! PLEASE STICK!!!
    1/25 Beta #1: 389, #2: 940! IT'S TWINS! 
    TEAM DOUBLE PINK!!!! <3
                               
      
                                     
                               
                                                      
      Pregnancy Ticker
  • PiperellaPiperella member
    edited January 2016
    *bfp mentioned but I want to join your post some more*

    I want to YELL and SLAP the people on fb that are like "Blizzard - Jan. 2016 / Baby Boom - Oct. 2016".  I want to tell them it's not always just that easy to wait for the appropriate shut-in weather to have a baby.  I've worked for years through infertility to get where I am and don't want to be associated with the others.  Those of us going through infertility know the amount of planning, medications, injections, ultrasounds, bloodwork, etc. that goes into the ability just to be in a TWW.  I just get so riled up with others thinking getting pregnant is the equivalent of snapping their fingers.
  • Just jumping on here to say I got the "relax and you'll get pregnant" thing a couple days ago -- nothing bugs me more! Let's all just drop the fertility treatments and head to the Caribbean for a vacation, right? Wouldn't that be better to spend our time and money on if all we had to do was relax?? Grr. OK... that is all. :)
    Me: 33, PCOS with anovulation
    DH: 36, No known issues
    TTC since 11/2014
    1000mg Metformin daily

    Oct-Dec 2015: Letrozole 5mg, Ovidrel, TI = BFN x 2
    Feb-May 2016: Letrozole 5mg, Ovidrel, TI, Prometrium = BFN x 3
    August 2016: Clomid 100mg no response, Letrozole 5mg, Ovidrel, TI, Prometrium = BFN

  • When someone tells me to just relax I want to punch the in the face!!! If it were just that easy!
  • I think there are so many people where having babies was super simple.  I've had friends get pregnant in their first month trying (or on their honeymoon) that have warned me that if we decide to have kids that we will probably get pregnant "super fast!"  They mean well and I don't tell everyone one about what's going on with us, but it's frustrating to hear about all these fertility goddesses. 

    When I'm feeling really bitter and small, I get mad about hearing someone who isn't in the healthiest state/doesn't exercise, is older than me, has some other medical issue, etc. that gets pregnant no problem.  I am the picture of health and family history looks good (same for SO).  But then I squash those horrible, petty thoughts.....I think.
  • @TheLabyrinth I totally agree with you about feeling bitter towards those who are unhealthy who get pregnant easily. It irks me too. Especially when it is overweight people. I try to get in at least 45 minutes 6 days a week of exercise and watch what I eat to stay at a healthy weight, yet you can eat doughnuts and pizza, weigh over 200 pounds and still get pregnant! I usually am unsuccessful at squashing those thoughts.
    About us:
    Me - 28, Lean PCOS
    DH - 31
    Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
    Blog: ourbinarystar.com

    FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!

  • @AandDM2014As someone who weighs over 200 pounds (But has busted her ass and has lost 40 pounds so far) I can see the anger. I worked out everyday, ate perfect, stopped smoking and drinking, and yet I go to walmart and some HUGE lady on a jazzy scooter has 3 kids running around with her. I'm no skinny minnie! (Don't hate on us chunkie monkies) I'm a size 12-14, but when people put no effort in at all and get pregnant, it definitely chaps my ass. 
    *BFP and Loss Warning*

    Married 10/01/11 to my partner in crime
    TTC #1 since 01/15 
    Me: PCOS 
    3 cycles of Clomid + TI - BFN
    IUI #1 Femara + Ovidrel - BFP!!!
    MC 07/15
    IUI #2-4 Femara + Ovidrel +Crinone - BFFN >:(
    IUI #5-6 Follistim + Ovidrel + Crinone - BFFN!
      IUI #7 Follistim + Ganirelix + Ovidrel + Prometrium + Baby Aspirin - BFP! PLEASE STICK!!!
    1/25 Beta #1: 389, #2: 940! IT'S TWINS! 
    TEAM DOUBLE PINK!!!! <3
                               
      
                                     
                               
                                                      
      Pregnancy Ticker
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