Monday Bitchfest (1/18)

PSUBecky23 · January 2016

Yes. I'm offended when people imply that working mothers aren't raising their own children. So weird.

noelani42 · January 2016

@jilligirl16 I think you're missing one simple fact: some women (not all, but some) would give anything to SAHM with their kiddos but just can't...those of us who are in that category already have major guilt as it is, but we know we're doing what's best for our family...we don't need anyone adding to our guilt by rubbing it in our faces that someone else is helping to raise our child...by the way, that's not the worst thing in the world- it takes a village, right? Or something like that...

mom2adoodle · January 2016

I really don't think @jilligirl16 was trying to be offensive. Poor choice of words, maybe, but not offensive.

But then again, it's a public board so everyone can interpret things as they would like. So, with that being tacit around these parts, maybe just apologize next time @jilligirl16 for not being clear in your post and keep things moving.

crispy11 · January 2016

It shouldn't matter if you are trying to be offensive. It would be nice to apologize when someone says you offended her, or in this case since we all agreed it was probably a poor use of words, just ignore it and move on. Coming back and saying that no, it wasn't a poor choice of words and you meant what you said isn't ideal, neither is blaming us.

Also saying it's your personal experience doesn't make it better. I could say in my *personal* experience, I am a working mom because I was so bored never using my mind when I stayed home during my 6 months of maternity leave. Personal experience but still not respectful of those who choose to stay home. (Also it was not true. I didn't feel that way about staying home. Love you SAHMs!)

crispy11 · January 2016

noelani42 said:
@jilligirl16 I think you're missing one simple fact: some women (not all, but some) would give anything to SAHM with their kiddos but just can't...those of us who are in that category already have major guilt as it is, but we know we're doing what's best for our family...we don't need anyone adding to our guilt by rubbing it in our faces that someone else is helping to raise our child...by the way, that's not the worst thing in the world- it takes a village, right? Or something like that...

True, but to add to this, I work 100% by choice and I still feel conflicted.

Shiva14 · January 2016

Sticky note...

HaidensMom96 · January 2016

Definitely didn't think she was starting a debate with #6. She was explaining her week.

HaidensMom96 · January 2016

Edit ** because I don't really care and this seems pointless

** deleted comment because I guess I can see how some moms would be offended.

** side note. Moms you're doing great no matter what you do.

nwshay · January 2016

WHOA! What the hell did I miss....

Image: https://www.reactiongifs.us/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/popcorn_jon_stewart.gif

HaidensMom96 · January 2016

How do you GIF!? @SDSwenson

nwshay · January 2016

I just right click on the image and say copy image and paste it right into the text box @HaidensMom96

I know there is a different way, but this way is super easy.

HaidensMom96 · January 2016

Thanks girl!

KimmySchmidt · January 2016

jilligirl16 said:

I think you all are honestly reading very much into this. When I was working, it tore me up every day knowing that my child was being cared for and being taught things by somebody else who wasn't me. And that person actually happened to be my mother, who I trust with all of my heart. And yes even though it was her, it still wasn't me and I didn't like it. Was she the only person raising my child? Absolutely not. Was I only person raising my child? Absolutely not. This is not a matter of opinion, it's a fact. Someone else was helping me raise my kid! And was spending at least 40 hours a week with my kid! And I'm sorry if you don't like it, but the fact is, I was not the only person who was raising my son. Fact. And for me, personally, I didn't like it. Now I feel better that I am able to be the only person, aside from my husband, to be raising my kid. I did not mean to offend anybody, but the fact that many of you were offended kind of raises eyebrows. If you feel happy and OK with your situations, then why are you feeling so offended by what I said? I never said anything about any of you or your personal situations or compared myself to other people. I was talking about myself. Seriously, this board is so ridiculous. Everybody loves to be offended! Lol.

QFP

KimmySchmidt · January 2016

@jilligirl16

I was willing to chalk this up before, but now you've outed yourself as an ignoramus. Let me make something clear for you: someone CARING FOR your child is different than someone RAISING your child. As a person raising a child, you make the decisions, you see to it that those decisions are enforced, you see that child from infancy through adulthood, you take that child to doctors appointments, you show up to their piano recitals and their baseball games. A day care provider enforces the decisions the parent has made, keeps the child safe in your absence. They leave when you stop paying them.

Both working mothers and stay at home mothers are raising their children.

If you want to be a SAHM because you don't want anyone else caring for your child, have a great time with that. But this pejorative talk about people leaving their kids to be raised by others can stop right now, thankyouverymuch.

618mom22boys · January 2016

Ok I feel stupid but what doe QFP mean? I've seen it a lot on other posts.

KimmySchmidt · January 2016

Also saying "for me personally" and then doling out judgement is basically the same as saying "no offense" when you know you're about to say something offensive.

Shiva14 · January 2016

@618mom22boys QFP means quote for proof, generally used to prevent someone from DD'ing (dirty deleting). Seems like this was more common "back in the day" on the bump (which I have to admit I miss -boards have slowed down so much)