Hermit Mode

angelinthepit23

So I've totally turned into a hermit. I have no desire to leave the house or have visitors over. Tonight my best friend it taking me out for dinner to celebrate my birthday and while I like the idea of it in my head the physical thought of it isn't appealing.

I don't know if it's because now that I'm back to work I feel like I NEED to be home with him as much as I can or if I'm just babied out on people. Getting asked the same set of questions daily is getting old, it's reminiscent of when I was pregnant and got asked multiple times a day "how I was feeling."

Anyone going through this?

bellie1223

Definitely! I think it's a combination of things you mentioned:

the same questions over and over (is she cute? Yes, duh; does she sleep? No, duh.) gets so old! As when I was pregnant, just because I have a baby doesn't mean that's ALL I want to talk about, I want to hear about other stuff too, like what's going on with you...

We've barely (at 11 weeks) settled into a semblance of a routine which works for us. Working around other people's schedules complicates things; mostly just for me, because then she's really cranky at night and I'm the one who has to get up with her.

I have also found that I have no desire at this point to get dolled up. Seriously, blow drying my hair and doing make up is pretty much the last thing I want to worry about; and I only have like three good outfits that I feel comfortable breastfeeding in so when I do work up the energy to go out with friends I feel like a total schlub!

I think this is the next big hurdle to get over--figuring out how the baby fits into everyday life, I know it's not going to be the same as it was before, but I am also 100% not going to become a permanent hermit just because I had a kid. I have a few friends who did this and it drives me crazy (though now I understand how real the struggle is!)

angelinthepit23

I'm scared of being that person. I've always been someone who is completely fine being alone in my own space and I don't want to slip away to hermitville!

CheeseSticksfor4

I'm a hermit and love it!!!!! No shame here. I find I spend less money this way and we come in contact with less germs...everyone wins!

ltlitaly87

Definitely a hermit during the weekdays since I'm a stay at home mom now. But with that being said I get super stir crazy and do a ton of stuff in one day and completely over do it. I love going out and being social with friends, obviously with baby by my side, probably because I'm home bound for majority of the week. I can imagine I would be the same as you if I were still working. Wanting to soak up as much time with your LO. Heck I still do that some days being at home.

Ditto as well on the annoying questions. "Is she still nursing well?" Really awkward for me especially when asked by my father-in-law. Or my personal favorite, literally every conversation with my mom, "are her eyes still blue?" Yeah mom they are and you will be the first to know should they change. Geez.

maiatene

Uhhhh I've been in hermit mode since I was in high school lol! If given the choice of my bed or a crowded space with strangers my bed wins all the time... add kids to the mix and I really don't want to be bothered.

The only time I will go out (then and now) is if it's a total VIP experience (no lines, bottle service, best of everything) and it has to be an actual VIP event with VIPs. Anything less makes me want to poke my eyes out #firstworldproblems

VexedMommy

I'm in hermit mode and it's a combination of what the OP mentioned, natural introversion, and PPD.  I like my house.  I like my bed.  I like snuggles and Netflix and privacy.  Unfortunately, I get dragged out every weekend to event after event with SD, DD1, and my child's father.  I'm getting burned out. 

Jeenyus

I'm totally a hermit as well! My daughter is 10 weeks and has her second cold, which turns me off of socialization. I know I need to try though, so will be pushing myself to attend a mom and me class to meet some other moms.

Lolo427

For me it's weighing the hassle of getting DD ready and what her mood is versus where I'm going and what am I doing .Am I realllyyyy going to gear her up (it was 8 degrees in NH yesterday) and pack up all her stuff only to have her scream at me in the middle of a book store or semi fast restaurant? No. The answer is no. Likewise, am I going to gear her up when I can take half the time doing whatever it is that I need to do when DH watches her? Still no. I run on only necessity trips for now. Maybe when the days get longer, the sun is shining and I don't feel like I'm catching hypothermia just from the draft my windows have.

kmd91

I'm jealous of you hermits! I've got cabin fever so bad, but for the most part don't have enough excuses to go and get out of the house. I honestly go along with me neighbor when she's running errands like going to Walmart just to get out of the house. I'd love to be content with just hanging out here. But me and the little dude are always looking for a reason to go somewhere.

helsbels222

If it wasn't freezing out, I would totally be venturing out more. It's easy for me to stay in and hang with LO in my jammies when it's so cold outside.

VexedMommy

kmd91 said:

I'm jealous of you hermits! I've got cabin fever so bad, but for the most part don't have enough excuses to go and get out of the house. I honestly go along with me neighbor when she's running errands like going to Walmart just to get out of the house. I'd love to be content with just hanging out here. But me and the little dude are always looking for a reason to go somewhere.

I had cabin fever with my first daughter.  She was a spring baby and I took daily walks with her to help relieve that.  If you live somewhere that's warm enough maybe you could try that.  It's surprising how many people you can meet just out and about.  It incentivized me to actually get into real clothes, brush my hair, and try to put myself together a bit.  It really helped with PP weight loss too which helped me feel better about myself which motivated me more to take care of myself better.  It was absolutely a win win for both me and my LO.

AshFox413

I have become a hermit as well. I absolutely hate the idea of having to leave the house, so I don't! Unless we have a doctors appointment. I have gotten really good a shopping from home. I am not a big fan of having guests either. I am glad I am not the only one. Not that I felt that bad about it, but it's nice to know its normal-ish.

rachswi

I would be so much less of a hermit if it wasn't so cold and lo didn't scream like a banshee every time we put him in his car seat

dramaphile

We had plans to go to dinner tonight with my best friend and her husband, and she is having babysitter issues, so had to cancel, and I pretty much did a happy dance. Dinner would be nice, but i was not looking forward to going out to the city with all the snow on the ground. Instead, we're hibernating and watching the X Files all day before the new season premieres which sounds like a pretty perfect day.