Don't tell my hubby....

maiatene

... I think I want more children lol!

It's funny to me because growing up in didn't want any, and after my son I said I would be open to being pregnant again because I didn't embrace my first one properly (ie I didn't wear maternity clothes at all, no official pictures, things like that). I have a boy and a girl, which most would consider perfect, but I think I miss being pregnant... not the constant peeing and 10 months of worrying if I'm going to make it to my due date but the awww I'm a mummie look at the baby kick my ribs feelings.

The only reason I hesitate is because I would then have 2 of 1 and 1 of the other, which would then make me want a 4th (I'm obsessed with symmetry lol). Oh and the whole financial thing because daycare and school is expensive in NYC.

Anyone else have a secret they are keeping from their hubby?

itstheblackwidowbaby

I'm the opposite in a way. We're not sure if we want another or not and even if we do that bridge is several years away...

Anyway, I'm plotting his vasectomy. If/when we're done I'll be damned if I'm on birth control until menopause. It's a sneaky plan involving a slow suggestion since I don't see him taking kindly to the thought of surgery. Kind of like a long drawn out non-dream Inception.

flas

Well it's not a secret with us. We have been discussing it on and off because some days when I feel like I can't take it anymore I say no way to a fourth and then some days I miss being pregnant and kind of want to add another. We said we were done and I thought I was but every once and awhile I can't help but think about it. Thankfully there have been enough cons that we are certain a fourth is not happening, especially since we have 2 boys and 1 girl already and we have no way to 100% guarantee another girl. DH will be getting snipped soon and that will finally be the end of it for us.

doodleoodle

I'm keeping a secret too... I don't want another baby lol. At first I openly said that I didn't, but my husband became adamant about having another. So now I'm saying that I definitely want another and talking about it all the time and guess what? Now he isn't so sure mwahahaha maybe if I push him too far he'll get a vasectomy. Great idea @itstheblackwidowbaby

makeoutside7

I only want one more. Not for me personally but so that my daughter has a sibling. Growing up I had 4 sisters and 2 brothers. We are all very close and I want that for my daughter. But seriously just one more. I hated being pregnant any I'm not even gonna talk about my traumatic birthing experience....

kwaldy

I want another... I seriously miss being pregnant (call me crazy) and I love the little baby phase. I've got an older stepdaughter (6 y.o) but I'd love for LO to have a sibling closer in age to her. Except I just got the nexplanon and DH wants to wait a while between babies. We shall see!

cdepperschmidt

I want another...eventually. I'm thinking maybe spring 2018. This is only baby #1. However, I'm torn. Do I want two kids? Three? Or do I want to be one of the families with lots of kids. I guess we'll take it one at a time. The only thing that keeps me from wanting lots of kids is all the major judgement you get with more than like three kids...and my student loans...stupid bills.

wulfpackgirl

I always wanted more than one but now I don't know. I don't want to pregnant again and the newborn phase is so exhausting. Little man is finally starting to sleep almost thru the night. My husband definitely wants another one. I do want my LO to have a sibling but then I think how exhausting two would be bc we would have to have them close due to my age. I miss having free time and me time. If we just had one I could devote more time to little man and maybe have a little time for me. Decisions decisions....

Escheffler34

Not a secret but this is our first and I totally want like four kids haha. Hopefully we will financially be able to have that many! :P
Eta also I wish I could be a sahm. I NEVER thought I'd say that, but now that he's here that's how I feel. Husband knows this and we would like to make it happen one day. Wish we won that powerball haha

NovemberSno

Were planning on trying for our fourth in April of this year!

As for my secret. I hate basketball. Lol. I pretend to like it for my DH but since the baby has come I have less patience to pretend lol. Luckily he also has less time to watch it. Ahh...man so disappointed we can't watch as much as before...OH WELL!!!

sadyy131

If it was up to me I would have twenty kids. I weirdly enjoyed my pregnancy and am so obsessed with my LO I can't imagine not having another. I personally would wait a few years so I can can graduate college, but SO wants to wait ten, IF at all we have another. He always said he was one and done, but after having LO he said maybe another in ten years. I feel like that is way too big of an age gap, but I'm getting Mirena for now so we will see. I grew up in a big family and loved having a lot of siblings. But I also obviously want to be able to finically support more than one child.

Ceridwen77

We discussed being OAD and DH is definitely in that boat. I really enjoyed my pregnancy, but did not do well with the lack of sleep during the first 6 weeks. I'd love my LO to have a sibling though, but I'm also older so I have to keep my AMA in mind, as I wouldn't want another child for a bit.

sacrazy

For the longest time my husband and I wanted two kids, but while I was pregnant we had a lot of discussions on if we thought it was financially and environmentally responsible. Having just the one will make things so much easier, we can both focus our energy on her and we will be able to provide more and give her experiences she may not otherwise have if we needed to split our resources.

I could, however, see myself pregnant and having another child if we were more financially stable. I miss being pregnant, it was a wonderful experience, one I wouldn't trade for the world.

Betsbrock84

This is my fourth child. I love being pregnant and I love babies. That being said, I do not want another child. I am exhausted. 4 is my limit. I am sad and happy because my husband will be snipped in 2 weeks so it will be finalized. No more talking about whether or not we can afford another one. Deep down I really want 6 kids but I think it would drain me emotionally and physically.

lyankowi

I could of been one and done but opps...definitely done at two.

threatlevelmidnight

I've always wanted 6 kids. LO is 6 weeks old and that hasn't changed. DH originally wanted 2 but we settled on 4. I overheard someone asking DH how many kids we will have and he said "4 or 5" so if we have 5 I will be like "eh what's one more?" Lol. Love babies and big families.

hlz128

It's not a secret for us that I want another baby. I have 4brothers and 4sisters. I want my son to have a sibling because mine mean so much to me. DH was all for having another one until DS was born and since he is one of five. Now he is all for having only him. He has talked about a vesictomy...sadly...
I'm currently on the pill but I've fantasized about stopping it and hoping we get pregnant again...however I would feel like a huge a**hole if I deceived my husband like that. So I definitely wouldn't, but it's crossed my evil mind.

helsbels222

I loved being pregnant! My pregnancies were easy, I was real lucky. During this pregnancy, I was already talking about having one more after. Since I am older, I wanted to have another rather soon. SO was all for it but after LO arrived, he says "so we're done now, right?" He feels one of each brings a nice equal balance to our family. He's right because I would totally want to try for a fourth. Also, after the crying non stop and staying up all night some nights, I realize I am getting too old for this crap and just want this phase to be over. We are so done!

Cook3133

I almost secretly hope we have an "oops" in the next 3 years and it is my miracle baby girl I've always wanted, but that's more of a dream I guess. I am more than happy with my 4 boys to be done having babies (plus 2 older step sons so after 6 boys I doubt I would get a girl anyway

rubirubi89

The secret is actually from everyone else except DH, we tell everyone that we are one and done but I want another one so bad. We decided we're waiting a couple of years and talk about it again then. I'm preparing a hell of a speech to convince him then. lol

mamavbs

flas said:

Well it's not a secret with us. We have been discussing it on and off because some days when I feel like I can't take it anymore I say no way to a fourth and then some days I miss being pregnant and kind of want to add another. We said we were done and I thought I was but every once and awhile I can't help but think about it. Thankfully there have been enough cons that we are certain a fourth is not happening, especially since we have 2 boys and 1 girl already and we have no way to 100% guarantee another girl. DH will be getting snipped soon and that will finally be the end of it for us.

I could have written this. Even down to the two boys and one girl. This is my story!!! I get a LOT of people telling me "you'll definitely have another" too, which pisses me off beyond belief. The fact they don't believe that il stop at three, may actually be the thing that stops me at three!!!


@itstheblackwidowbaby yes for inception. Slowly slowly planting those seeds. I've done birth control since I was 16... It's about time he has a go

GoogleMD

itstheblackwidowbaby said:

I'm the opposite in a way. We're not sure if we want another or not and even if we do that bridge is several years away...

Anyway, I'm plotting his vasectomy. If/when we're done I'll be damned if I'm on birth control until menopause. It's a sneaky plan involving a slow suggestion since I don't see him taking kindly to the thought of surgery. Kind of like a long drawn out non-dream Inception.

I did not agree to making a baby until we agreed on the end game ( him getting decommissioned ). I carried/will carry and birth our children, he can get snipped. It is a much easier procedure for men anyways.

Rumor has it, there will be male BC on thr market late 2018. A monthly pill.

AmoLovesAud

I originally wanted 3, but now being in the throws of the newborn phase I am so very done. I was an OC and I loved it, I'd be fine just having my one precious little girl. I also hated being pregnant, even though i had a fairly easy and healthy pregnancy, I don't miss it and I'd be fine never doing it again. DH wants one more, though, so he has a lot of convincing to do, and a long wait, I don't want 2 in diapers! DH also wants to try for a bit of a career change late next year, personally I think it'd be for the best if we wait till that is mostly figured out before getting pregnant again. But if we have another, I have to have a RCS, so I'll just get my tubes tied whIle they're in there.

VexedMommy

AmoLovesAud said:

I originally wanted 3, but now being in the throws of the newborn phase I am so very done. I was an OC and I loved it, I'd be fine just having my one precious little girl. I also hated being pregnant, even though i had a fairly easy and healthy pregnancy, I don't miss it and I'd be fine never doing it again. DH wants one more, though, so he has a lot of convincing to do, and a long wait, I don't want 2 in diapers! DH also wants to try for a bit of a career change late next year, personally I think it'd be for the best if we wait till that is mostly figured out before getting pregnant again. But if we have another, I have to have a RCS, so I'll just get my tubes tied whIle they're in there.

I really disliked being pregnant the first time.  I was 21 and the first of my friends to experience it.  I was overwhelmed and didn't deal that well with it.  The second time was so much better.  I knew what to expect and was actually able to marvel at the changes in my body instead of panicking over them.  Not trying to convince you.  I swore I would be one and done, but my bf's doctors were a bit premature in saying he couldn't have kids and surprise!  lol.

MercyC1130

I'm so undecided if I ever another baby. I used to think I wanted three. But I'm not a fan of pregnancy. At all.
This newborn phase is great and all, but the thought of everdoing it all over is exhausting. Plus, my so isn't exactly a great newborn-phase dad.
Plus I'm selfish maybe, but I want my body back.
I want to drink here and there, and the thought of not being able to for another couple years is daunting.
That's not all that important but... It's the little things..
Buuut, like some pp had said, I want my lo to have siblings.
Maybe I'll just make sure he's super close to his cousins!

My so is so ambiguous if he wants another also. I'm curious now to find out for sure.

JLW0504

I told DH that I could do this one more time and I thought he was going to have a heart attack. He is adamant about Maddie being our last but, I'm not so sure. I'm keeping my options open for us....unless he gets a vasectomy...

segorman17

I loved my pregnancy, and I have loved being a mom to our 12 week old. I even loved the sleepless nights and endless crying. Maybe it's a new mom high or something, but all I can think about is how much I want another LO.During my pregnancy I would think how I couldn't wait to do it again! I actually get sad sometimes bc we are not actively trying. If I had it my way, we would start trying now; but my reasonable side says we need to wait until LO is a year old and we are better prepared.

doodleoodle

I'm reviving this thread because I'm having a change of heart... I initially wanted to be one and done. I'm ashamed to say that even though I have the sweetest, most beautiful baby in the world I don't think I'm a "baby" person. I think I'm a toddler person. I'm very blessed to be staying at home with my sweet babe, but the days can get lonely and I find that I'm reminding myself daily that it will be more fun soon. I can't wait until she's old enough to really play with. The fact that I'm not enjoying this stage as much as I should be is totally my fault. I'm too high strung about her and I know it. Everything has to be be perfect for fear that she will grow up feeling unloved, or something. I've been thinking about what it will be like when she's older. Things like tea parties and when the best time to take her on her first Disney trip would be... And then I think, the older she gets will she be lonely for a sibling? Won't she eventually have more fun daily and enjoy family vacations more with a playmate? It will be so stressful for a couple of years, but now I'm thinking of an 18 month age gap so that they will always be close enough in age to relate to one another and family activities can be planned around the same age group. Am I totally insane??

Jtk13

doodleoodle said:

I'm reviving this thread because I'm having a change of heart... I initially wanted to be one and done. I'm ashamed to say that even though I have the sweetest, most beautiful baby in the world I don't think I'm a "baby" person. I think I'm a toddler person. I'm very blessed to be staying at home with my sweet babe, but the days can get lonely and I find that I'm reminding myself daily that it will be more fun soon. I can't wait until she's old enough to really play with. The fact that I'm not enjoying this stage as much as I should be is totally my fault. I'm too high strung about her and I know it. Everything has to be be perfect for fear that she will grow up feeling unloved, or something. I've been thinking about what it will be like when she's older. Things like tea parties and when the best time to take her on her first Disney trip would be... And then I think, the older she gets will she be lonely for a sibling? Won't she eventually have more fun daily and enjoy family vacations more with a playmate? It will be so stressful for a couple of years, but now I'm thinking of an 18 month age gap so that they will always be close enough in age to relate to one another and family activities can be planned around the same age group. Am I totally insane??

You're not insane! I feel the same way. I adore my daughter but I don't love the newborn phase. I'm a SAHM and don't live close to my family so I am super lonely. We are also dealing with bad reflux and I am on an insane elimination diet that sucks. I do not want to do it again but I grew up in a big family and loved it so I am having more for her. I think being an only child would be lonely and sad! 

Also, my DH wants 4! I keep telling him that he can carry and deliver two if he wants that many. 

doodleoodle

@Jtk13 that makes me feel better. Thanks! I could not even imagine 4 lol bless his heart

Ceridwen77

doodleoodle said:

I'm reviving this thread because I'm having a change of heart... I initially wanted to be one and done. I'm ashamed to say that even though I have the sweetest, most beautiful baby in the world I don't think I'm a "baby" person. I think I'm a toddler person. I'm very blessed to be staying at home with my sweet babe, but the days can get lonely and I find that I'm reminding myself daily that it will be more fun soon. I can't wait until she's old enough to really play with. The fact that I'm not enjoying this stage as much as I should be is totally my fault. I'm too high strung about her and I know it. Everything has to be be perfect for fear that she will grow up feeling unloved, or something. I've been thinking about what it will be like when she's older. Things like tea parties and when the best time to take her on her first Disney trip would be... And then I think, the older she gets will she be lonely for a sibling? Won't she eventually have more fun daily and enjoy family vacations more with a playmate? It will be so stressful for a couple of years, but now I'm thinking of an 18 month age gap so that they will always be close enough in age to relate to one another and family activities can be planned around the same age group. Am I totally insane??

I wanted to be OAD too, but I am just loving this mommy thing so much. I can't imagine never going through this baby phase again. And I worry about when she's older, when DH and I are gone, she won't have any family. My problem is DH is completely set on being OAD, and I'm AMA. I'll start to put a bug in his ear at the end of the year, though, to see where that goes. 

doodleoodle

Ceridwen77 said:

doodleoodle said:

I'm reviving this thread because I'm having a change of heart... I initially wanted to be one and done. I'm ashamed to say that even though I have the sweetest, most beautiful baby in the world I don't think I'm a "baby" person. I think I'm a toddler person. I'm very blessed to be staying at home with my sweet babe, but the days can get lonely and I find that I'm reminding myself daily that it will be more fun soon. I can't wait until she's old enough to really play with. The fact that I'm not enjoying this stage as much as I should be is totally my fault. I'm too high strung about her and I know it. Everything has to be be perfect for fear that she will grow up feeling unloved, or something. I've been thinking about what it will be like when she's older. Things like tea parties and when the best time to take her on her first Disney trip would be... And then I think, the older she gets will she be lonely for a sibling? Won't she eventually have more fun daily and enjoy family vacations more with a playmate? It will be so stressful for a couple of years, but now I'm thinking of an 18 month age gap so that they will always be close enough in age to relate to one another and family activities can be planned around the same age group. Am I totally insane??

I wanted to be OAD too, but I am just loving this mommy thing so much. I can't imagine never going through this baby phase again. And I worry about when she's older, when DH and I are gone, she won't have any family. My problem is DH is completely set on being OAD, and I'm AMA. I'll start to put a bug in his ear at the end of the year, though, to see where that goes. 

Tell him you want three more and then after six months or so say you will compromise and agree to just have one more lol You've got to make him think he's winning!