Vacation

CFK

My son is 2 1/2 years old and my husband wants to take him on vacation with his parents to Florida (we live in the Midwest).  I am invited but I cannot get the time off from work and we have a 6 month old as well.  I don't really want my son's first vacation (and plane trip) to be without me -- plus, I don't feel ready for him to be that far away from me (I trust my husband and in-laws, but neither has been the primary caregiver for my son since he was born).  My husband rarely gets time off work, but has the time to go to Florida and wants to take him.  Am I being unreasonable by saying no?

Sarcasm101

Yes, I think you are. He is your husband's child also. You will have plenty of other opportunities to take a family vacation. And I first plane ride is something I would happily miss.  

Bigboobsmcgee

Sarcasm101 said:

Yes, I think you are. He is your husband's child also. You will have plenty of other opportunities to take a family vacation. And I first plane ride is something I would happily miss.  

Dude. All of this. 100%. Find a way to go with or let them go and be happy for them.

atcwag

I would have similar feelings, but I also agree that this is unreasonable. I'd let them go and be happy they get to spend some one on one time together.

tracij12

I would probably feel the same, but ultimately would discuss my feelings with H and come to a decision together. Doesn't seem like a decision that one parent would make alone.

If the decision was to have them go and there was absolutely no way I could swing it, I'd probably be pushing for him to take the little one as well and enjoy my week alone (I'm halfway joking)

FWIW, plane travel with a toddler is seriously not fun. I don't think I could pay my husband to take my oldest daughter on a flight/trip without me so major props to your H.

dufferoo

Man, I don't think your feelings are that unreasonable. I'm pretty attached to my children and would also have a hard time being separated from my toddler for a whole week. This would definitely be something my husband and I would be discussing, making pro/con lists, etc. If you ultimately decide not to split up for vacation this time, it might be a great time to start planning a family vacation that you can ALL enjoy!

Bigboobsmcgee

dufferoo said:

Man, I don't think your feelings are that unreasonable. I'm pretty attached to my children and would also have a hard time being separated from my toddler for a whole week. This would definitely be something my husband and I would be discussing, making pro/con lists, etc. If you ultimately decide not to split up for vacation this time, it might be a great time to start planning a family vacation that you can ALL enjoy!

Same here. I've never been away from my kids for more than 24 hours and I'd have a really hard time with this too. I'd probably do just about anything to avoid having to be away from my kids for a whole week but I would never tell my husband he couldn't do something with his kids. I would find a way to get off work so I could be there too or we just take vacations together.

SLGILL1978

I don't think your feelings are unreasonable. It's natural as you are the primary care giver. Actually saying no, would make it unreasonable. Let him get some father/son bonding time and you can get some extra bonding time with your baby. I just think that you should put yourself in your husband's place. Think of how he feels when he misses out on family things going on due to work responsibilities. 

CFK

Thanks to all.  I should have been a little clearer in my original post.  My H and I had previously discussed this--his parents have a condo in FL and go there quite a bit and asked us to go a number of times (so there are plenty of opportunities for us to go).  We both (together) decided that we would wait until our oldest was a bit older so we could all enjoy the experience together.  His parents are really nice, but they have in the past done things that we do not like, nothing too big but little things (for example, they give our son LOTS of sweets when he over their house even after we have asked them not too and they have taken him out on a boat with other people without asking us when he was very young).  In short, I am uncomfortable with them watching him alone for long periods of time so far away, which would likely be the case in Florida since my husband would undoubtedly (and deservedly) like to relax a little himself.  We talked through it and decided that we would plan a time this spring when we could all go.  (I think that a daddy-son day when he missed his nap made my H rethink his desire to go alone just as much as our discussion, but we are on the same page now about going as a family sometime soon).  Thanks again