Signing a contract for a new job - help!

HulaCherry

After ten years working in our family business, my company had the opportunity to merge with one of our competitors. It's an incredible opportunity for me and the rest of our staff. My mom is retiring, and she knows I'm pregnant, but none of my co-workers do or anyone involved in this business transaction. I'm 9 weeks and actually going to my first appointment today to see the little bean. I'm full of tons of emotions today as another huge chapter of my life is about to come to a close. They want me to sign a one year contract with them, which I'm fine with. I just never worried about an employer being upset about my wonderful news since I've always worked for family. I have a friend going through a very hard time right now at her job because she's pregnant - which is disgusting and would make me reevaluate who I worked for. 

The question is - when do I have to tell them? 

PugsandKisses

Most people do not tell until the end of 1st trimester, when the risk of miscarriage is lower.

meggyme

Most companies request at least 30 days notice, but I think most people tell when they start showing. Unless you have severe morning sickness or other complications, in which case you may have to tell earlier.

dolewhipper

I told my boss at 13 weeks, when I started showing. I would wait as long as humanly possible. 

missshanab

Yes, you do NOT have to tell them until you are ready or 30-60 days before any leave is requested. Some HR representatives will "trick" you into thinking you have to tell them immediately. This isn't true. If it is not affecting your attendance, they don't need to know.

HulaCherry

Thank you all for your advice.  I don't want them to think I was being deceitful by not revealing my pregnancy, but I don't really think it is any of their business.  If it affected our business transaction, that would be grounds for discrimination.  I will definitely wait until after the first trimester is over with to say anything and make sure everything is going great with the baby.

kyraaD

you can tell them whenever you want.
i personally told my boss right away so he would understand if I was calling in sick or needed more time off than usual for appointments & such. but i didnt tell anyone else until end of 1st Tri (week 14) because it's the riskiest part of pregnancy. i didn't want something to go wrong & then have to explain over & over what happened when people asked about the pregnancy. but that's just me!

1faceinacrowd

It's very common to wait until the 12th or 13th week of pregnancy to tell your employer. Don't feel like you're hiding something from them; pregnancy is a personal matter and unless it's affecting your attendance, there's no need to tell them right away. 

mouse1029

This is a different situation because it's almost like you're starting a new job. Usually you in to be in your position 12 months before you're eligible for FMLA. I may actually tell them so it can be part of your contract.

HulaCherry

@mouse1029 I am supposed to review contract terms tomorrow.  Hopefully the company has a maternity leave policy.  While 90% of the employees are men, I would think they would have to take this into consideration.  I don't think I'm comfortable telling them at our meeting.  My job performance will not be affected. 

NHKx2

When you HAVE to tell them is likely different than when you may choose to tell them. Check your contract. In the UK, for example, I wasn't contractually obligated to tell my employer until like week 25 of pregnancy. 

mcklough

I agree that since your company is being bought out by another company that you may want to tell them if their company policies don't already have maternity leave. You won't legally qualify for FMLA since you won't be there a year and they could deny any leave beyond regular sick/vacation.

It shouldn't effect the company merger but I'm pretty sure the law is on their "side" when it comes to any kind of leave if you are in the US. You could also speak with the lawyers handling the merger because there may be state specific things or they might be able to write up something that existing employees should be grandfathered in to FMLA rights

HulaCherry

@mcklough I am seeing the contract today, and plan on asking to take it to review tonight. That is an excellent idea about having all of our existing employees grandfathered into FMLA rights.  We have employees that have been here 20+ years that will be a part of this merger. 

delujm0

Due to the potential maternity leave ramifications here...i would probably tell them ASAP, before signing the contract, because if you will not qualify for FMLA for some reason (depending on the size of these companies, they might be small enough to not even fall under FMLA guidelines at all) you could negotiate a maternity leave into your employment contract.

cls2019

Hi there! 1st congrats. I just left my company of 6 yrs to start a new job (little did I know that I was pregnant 5 wks pregnant when accepting the position and moving). Nevertheless my DH was supportive of our change and we forged ahead. Bc of the company/industry I now work in I had to tell them the 1 wk of employment (bc of safety etc.- I was 8wks). I got much support from the team that it was overwhelming and can only thank God for my good fortune. Even with out FMLA I still have 8-12wks mat leave. I would suggest that you speak with your HR team whenever you feel comfortable. Remember you cannot be fired just bc you are pregnant and I wish you well.

stillcozy

I told my supervisor when I was struggling a lot with ms. I would still sign your contract they can't punish you for it. I hope they will be supportive to you when they find out

HulaCherry

After many delays, we sign tomorrow.  I'm going to wait another week to tell them as I've just gone through all of my 11 week blood tests.  Even though our baby was bouncing around, waving, and showing a strong heartbeat, we really want to feel like everything is going well before I tell my new employer. It's a unique situation, but they've been entertaining me with lunches and dinners, and so my husband has had an opportunity to meet them as well.  He feels really good since meeting them that their reaction will be positive.  Thanks again for all of the support and encouragement!

stillcozy

Hope all continue to go well for you!
Eta: my only suggestion is maybe wait two weeks that way your at the end of the first tri and it seems more like you were waiting for that then just waiting to sign the contract if that makes sense?

mrsman2018

I have a job interview this week and won't be letting them know. I am only 5.5 weeks pregnant, so I don't feel it is any of their business. In Canada we are not obligated to tell our employer. 
Good luck. 

sonbonsbun

I had the same issue, two days after I found out I needed to resign my contract for another year. Once you sign there is nothing they can really do, you can't by punished for being pregnant! Out of respect to them (the company) I'm telling them in a week (when I'm 12 weeks) this just gives them time to plan. Just an FYI they don't need to resign your contract after a year though. Or that's just how it is in Canada...

kristah2

I just took a new job. I signed the paperwork about 2 weeks ago. Found out I was pregnant last Thursday. I actually haven't even started yet. My course starts on March 7th. 
Ive thought about what I'm going to do as well. It's illegal to fire someone because they are pregnant so my plan now is to go in and work my ass off until I have to tell them (once I cant hide it anymore) and then continue to work my ass off until I go on leave so they have a very positive memory of me and my work ethic and will be excited for me to come back. 
I also have a probationary period so I'm trying to wait until the end of that just so they don't get upset and find another reason to get rid of me. Ill be 4.5 months then so hopefully I can dress to hide a bump for a while! 

soxfan9968

kristah2

Hahaha! Didn't even see the original date came up at the top from a recent comment. Well I feel foolish!