The complain about your significant other thread

rnyland1

I know we have many threads for complaining, but thought it might be nice to have one just for complaining about our significant others especially since the other threads get quite long.

So, what has your DH, BF, or SO said or done recently that annoys the crap out of you?

I could go on for days, but my husband told me that his New Year's resolution was to put himself first, and start doing more for himself....ummm, what?! I think I threw up a little when I heard him say that, especially when I feel as though I carry most of the weight when in comes to childcare and housework/cooking, in addition to having a full time job/being the breadwinner. I never get as much as a minute "for myself." Ugh. Men!

missmelanie02

Yes! DH thinks that you can control pregnancy symptoms. Food cravings/aversions, mood swings, fatigue. What!!? I wish!! Drives me insane

DominiqueU

My main complaint about my DH is that he cannot seem to comprehend how much my boobs freaking hurt right now. Leave them alone! Uggghhhh.

I was actually just thinking of starting a thread where we can talk about the GOOD things our SOs do. I love to complain as much as the next pregnant gal, but it might be a good idea to also remember that we let these people knock us up for a reason. Any thoughts?

rnyland1

DominiqueU said:

My main complaint about my DH is that he cannot seem to comprehend how much my boobs freaking hurt right now. Leave them alone! Uggghhhh.

I was actually just thinking of starting a thread where we can talk about the GOOD things our SOs do. I love to complain as much as the next pregnant gal, but it might be a good idea to also remember that we let these people knock us up for a reason. Any thoughts?

I'm sure that would be a great idea! Could be the hormones but I don't have anything to add to that type of thread at the moment lol. I don't like complaining about my DH to family members and friends personally, so I thought a thread here would be good

DominiqueU

@rnyland1 I think the hormones are probably forcing us all to have overly lovely moments and overly annoyed moments, so having both threads will cover all the bases of SO directed emotion.

MDmomma1217

DH has been pretty great and helpful, but it annoys the crap out of me when he thinks the solution to my MS is to just force myself to eat. He keeps saying "You have to think of food like medicine, you just have to force yourself to eat it." I know he's worried because I've lost weight (although nowhere near the amount that I lost with DD) and he is trying to make sure I'm healthy. But to tell me to eat when I'm puking several times a day and NOTHING seems appetizing gets really old after a while.

stillcozy

@MDmomma1217 ugh that would get so irritating!

crixiegirl

My DH is wonderful for the most part, but damn stop trying to hump me all the time when I tell you I don't feel well and leave me alone when we're in bed so I can sleep!! Also, he needs to figure out the snoring thing..he went to the doc for a checkup and I told him the only thing I want him to ask is about his snoring and what does he say when he gets home... "I forgot" ugh wtf!!?

rnyland1

DominiqueU said:

@rnyland1 I think the hormones are probably forcing us all to have overly lovely moments and overly annoyed moments, so having both threads will cover all the bases of SO directed emotion.

Glad a lot of people have supportive SO's that they can brag about! Much better than the alternative. In my last BMC for when my first son was born, there was a lot more baby daddy drama. Every relationship has some ups and down; unfortunately for my DH and I we are definitely in more of a rough patch currently...so very few if any lovely moments for us. Maybe when I actually start being more visibly pregnant he will step up a bit? I hope so anyway!

stillcozy

rnyland1 said:

DominiqueU said:

@rnyland1 I think the hormones are probably forcing us all to have overly lovely moments and overly annoyed moments, so having both threads will cover all the bases of SO directed emotion.

Glad a lot of people have supportive SO's that they can brag about! Much better than the alternative. In my last BMC for when my first son was born, there was a lot more baby daddy drama. Every relationship has some ups and down; unfortunately for my DH and I we are definitely in more of a rough patch currently...so very few if any lovely moments for us. Maybe when I actually start being more visibly pregnant he will step up a bit? I hope so anyway!

Is this your first and does he have a book for dads about pregnancy? It really helped my husband.

rnyland1

Lindsayleigh1989 said:

rnyland1 said:

DominiqueU said:

@rnyland1 I think the hormones are probably forcing us all to have overly lovely moments and overly annoyed moments, so having both threads will cover all the bases of SO directed emotion.

Glad a lot of people have supportive SO's that they can brag about! Much better than the alternative. In my last BMC for when my first son was born, there was

Is this your first and does he have a book for dads about pregnancy? It really helped my husband.

Lindsayleigh1989 said:

rnyland1 said:

DominiqueU said:

@rnyland1 I think the hormones are probably forcing us all to have overly lovely moments and overly annoyed moments, so having both threads will cover all the bases of SO directed emotion.

Glad a lot of people have supportive SO's that they can brag about! Much better than the alternative. In my last BMC for when my first son was born, there was a lot more baby daddy drama. Every relationship has some ups and down; unfortunately for my DH and I we are definitely in more of a rough patch currently...so very few if any lovely moments for us. Maybe when I actually start being more visibly pregnant he will step up a bit? I hope so anyway!

Is this your first and does he have a book for dads about pregnancy? It really helped my husband.

Lindsayleigh1989 said:

rnyland1 said:

DominiqueU said:

@rnyland1 I think the hormones are probably forcing us all to have overly lovely moments and overly annoyed moments, so having both threads will cover all the bases of SO directed emotion.

Glad a lot of people have supportive SO's that they can brag about! Much better than the alternative. In my last BMC for when my first son was born, there was a lot more baby daddy drama. Every relationship has some ups and down; unfortunately for my DH and I we are definitely in more of a rough patch currently...so very few if any lovely moments for us. Maybe when I actually start being more visibly pregnant he will step up a bit? I hope so anyway!

Is this your first and does he have a book for dads about pregnancy? It really helped my husband.

This is our second child and his FOURTH since he has 2 kids from a previous marriage that didn't work out. So he definitely knows a lot about pregnancy/babies, he just doesn't care about much else but himself sometimes. I'm worried we're headed in the same direction

ncm1919

We both work from home. Usually my husband had beautiful work boundaries and leaves me alone. He had his own office while I work at the kitchen table.

I have my sales kickoff this weekend and I have to do a mountain or prep work. I have to complete 5 courses along with tests that I have to pass. I swear to all that's holy he is walking around, cooking, talking to me when I'm clearly working and listening to lessons with headphones in.

Serenity now

soberkfell

My "DH" just had the balls to say that "I have had almost no 'me' time this week, and with juggling so much at work, I need that time to keep things balanced." 1) THE MINUTE I started the bedtime routine with DS each evening this week AT 7:00 PM, H was down in the basement playing his baseball video game for at least 2 hours. 2) When did juggling so much at work start to include designing baseball cards in Paint and Excel and reading 37 lists on Buzzfeed a day? 3) I'm mainly pissed because I never complain about not getting alone time. But he acts like a small child about it. I have to ask permission to go out to dinner with friends because it might inconvenience him to have to watch our son and not get enough time to himself, but it's OK for the sick pregnant chick to chase a toddler around the entire time without a break so you can sit on your ass in the basement playing video games. ...and dinner better still be on the table when he's hungry! Tired of looking forward to the weekends to spend time with my family only to end up feeling like a single parent.

blissylissy86

My lovely husband does not understand why although I have only gained 2 pounds I need some maternity clothes. He is honestly confused by this. Now I am a big girl, so it is more difficult to see the changes in my body than it would if I were a smaller person, but come on!

mamafox14

blissylissy86 said:

My lovely husband does not understand why although I have only gained 2 pounds I need some maternity clothes. He is honestly confused by this. Now I am a big girl, so it is more difficult to see the changes in my body than it would if I were a smaller person, but come on!

Psh that is ridiculous! I've lost 10 pounds and I still had to get maternity pants last week because my regular pants were cutting into my damn uterus!

LadyFleck

I am the opposite when it comes to the "not wanting your husband to hump you all the time." My husband and I have opposite schedules and we have very limited time to get it on. For a long time it's been only weekend mornings, but recently it's been only every other weekend, which I completely understand but am not particularly happy about.

This past weekend was prime opportunity and we were laying in bed cuddling when he just gets up and goes downstairs. It was full on rejection. I was so upset, I couldn't decide between punching him in the face or crying like a baby. Since domestic violence is a criminal offense, I chose the latter and spent my whole day crying (hormones amiright?).

Don't reject a pregnant woman who already feels like crap about her body and needs to get some.

MamaBish

I made bbq chicken last night, one of my favorite foods ever. In the middle of dinner, he says he thinks it tastes funny (it doesn't) and he's worried something is wrong with it. Implying that I shouldn't eat it. Of course, I've already scarfed down half of it and it tastes fine to me. But what happens? My mind starts to worry. What if he's right??!

I stop eating the chicken, neither of us gets sick. The chicken was fine.

noelietrex

DH has started snoring recently. We have no idea why. It's his pregnancy symptom. Last night he woke me with HUGE LOUD snores at 3am. He rolled over and went back to sleep. I stayed up making to do lists until 5:30am, then got up at 7. Pregnancy insomnia is hard enough. WTF is this snoring?! How do I make it stop?! Heading to the drugs store for breathe right strips and ear plugs after work... Just WTH? Did he gain weight? Is he allergic to the pregnancy pillow? WHY???

elldel

noelietrex said:

DH has started snoring recently. We have no idea why. It's his pregnancy symptom. Last night he woke me with HUGE LOUD snores at 3am. He rolled over and went back to sleep. I stayed up making to do lists until 5:30am, then got up at 7. Pregnancy insomnia is hard enough. WTF is this snoring?! How do I make it stop?! Heading to the drugs store for breathe right strips and ear plugs after work... Just WTH? Did he gain weight? Is he allergic to the pregnancy pillow? WHY???

My husband is a snorer too. He got some breathe-right strips and a mouth guard thingie that seems to help, but I personally think he needs to see his doc. He usually wakes me up once or twice a night with his loud ass snores, and then of course the insomnia kicks in. For a while, I'd just get up and go into the guest room to try and fall back asleep. Lately, though, I guess he's realized it's a problem, because he'll volunteer to take the guest room instead. Sucks not sleeping next to him, but at least I'm getting some rest finally.

TiffRox81

So my husband is between jobs...which is another complaint entirely.....and yesterday decided he'd take the liberty of picking out, buying and painting the baby's room. We've had a LOT of discussion on what we both like, so I wasn't concerned. However, when I came home and saw the blue'ish grey walls, instead of "elephant" grey as we discussed, I was kind of upset!!! We talked about adding stripes to one wall, to give it some pizzaz. He did a few stripes at the top of two walls that parallel each other. It just wasn't what I felt like either of us had envisioned, so needless to say my reaction was a little harsh. I looked at it again this morning, and no amount of light changed the fact that it's more blue than grey. I'm thinking I'm thinking to even the score, I'm choosing the theme! We talked owls, koalas or sheep, as we're trying to stay gender neutral. Well I want sheep and he doesn't love that idea. I think sheep it is!

MrsRo731

@TiffRox81 - To be honest, it's REALLY hard to find a true grey paint color. DH and I tried a few times and they either had a green hue or blue hue; we ended up painting our living room about 3 times because of this. Is it possible he was trying to do something nice and just ended up with the wrong color by accident? I could be totally off - just throwing that out there! 

TiffRox81

@MrsRo731 Oh yes, it definitely wasn't intentional. I think my main source of irritation is I said I would have liked to have at least gone to help pick things out! It is what it is, and it's grown on me a tad overnight. Maybe we'll just go with grey furniture!

soberkfell

I agree with @MrsRo731 - it's difficult to find a grey without a hue of another color. Our nursery is currently grey, but it has a purple hue to it. I think your choices in furniture, curtains, any wall-hangings, and complementary colors in the room can help in tricking your eye into not seeing the blue tint as much.

TiffRox81

Ok well I'm glad we're not alone. You're right - this just gives us an opportunity to use the grey of our choice for window treatments, etc. It'll work out. The new running joke is this bedroom is now a blue'ish grey, the guest bathroom is a teal blue, and the other guest bedroom is total baby blue!! We're team green, but I've said I think these are all signs it's gotta be a boy, LOL!

ncm1919

For future use, we painted our entire house Benjamin Moore Smoke embers and love it. Great grey that stays pretty true to the sample.

rnyland1

Welp, just got off the phone after an "argument" with H...by argument I mean listening to him yell at me about various things. This of course happened after a very rough day at work...and I'm still getting nasty texts from H...ack. So now I'm just sitting in The YMCA parking lot by myself and crying hoping that he'll forget about whatever he was mad about soon. Sad day

stillcozy

@rnyland1 sorry that happened been there do your best to not let it ruin your night and if he continues speak your mind! Or write an email or letter to him. This has been my go to lately as I get just as explosive if not more so then him and it's helped me channel my feelings read them and give them to him if necessary or toss them if I realize it was a non issue but I'm sorry you are having a rough night! Hope he apologizes!

agradi

I came home from work to a very drunk boyfriend who has to be at work at 4:30 in the morning... That's annoying enough but to top it off we started fighting when all I wanted to do was eat dinner and go to bed. Apparently I'm just a fucking mooch who is milking my feeling like shit all the time... Cool bro, go kick rocks. I wish he would get how God damn hard it is to function when all you want to do is puke and sleep!

stillcozy

agradi said:

I came home from work to a very drunk boyfriend who has to be at work at 4:30 in the morning... That's annoying enough but to top it off we started fighting when all I wanted to do was eat dinner and go to bed. Apparently I'm just a fucking mooch who is milking my feeling like shit all the time... Cool bro, go kick rocks. I wish he would get how God damn hard it is to function when all you want to do is puke and sleep!

Sounds like he needs to grow the hell up who gets drunk when they have to work early the next day? Ugh tell him off when he is sober.

agradi

@Lindsayleigh1989 he is normally really good about it. Idk what the hell got into him last night but we are still not on great terms. It's pretty cool

rnyland1

Lindsayleigh1989 said:

@rnyland1 sorry that happened been there do your best to not let it ruin your night and if he continues speak your mind! Or write an email or letter to him. This has been my go to lately as I get just as explosive if not more so then him and it's helped me channel my feelings read them and give them to him if necessary or toss them if I realize it was a non issue but I'm sorry you are having a rough night! Hope he apologizes!

Thanks! I guess he says he doesn't feel loved and appreciated enough...for me I just get caught up in the daily grind: work, taking care of kid, pets, housework, meals, bills, general exhaustion due to pregnancy...so yeah I don't sit there and thank him and give him balloons every time he does something for our family. But I understand too that he probably feels neglected. Not sure what I can do to improve the situation. Will take any advice though!

MrsRo731

@rnyland1 - This is going to sound so cheesy but DH and I have started trying to thank each other for little things more; for example, the other night he took DD out for dinner to give me some time to relax after work because I was feeling shitty. I thanked him. It sounds really dumb but just thanking him (and him thanking me, too!) has helped us both feel much more appreciated. I hope things get better for you; it's very stressful on a relationship having children. ((hugs))

afrazer521

So not appropriate for a public forum but I have no one to talk to at the moment and am so fucking furious and upset I need to put this somewhere into the universe. I just caught my husband cheating. Again. He wanted to "play a computer game" and I went to get something and saw him getting sexually provocative pictures from someone he "found on snapchat". Now according to him he has never physically cheated but has done this multiple times. When I had ds he left me in the hospital while I was recovering from my c section and ds was in the nicu and went home and swapped nudes with a teenager. He told her he was single, no kids and was 17. At the time he was 27. I was leaving him when I found out I was pregnant with this one and decided stupidly to give it one more shot for the sake of the baby and ds. I'm such a fucking idiot. This is the nail in the coffin. His excuse? I was paranoid he was doing things behind my back so he decided to do it. Wtf. I can't even think right now I'm so beyond detroyed. Who the hell does this to their pregnant wife. So ladies, it looks like I'm going this pregnancy alone and am now going to be a single mother. Yay me.

stillcozy

@afrazer521 I'm so sorry to hear that. It is absolutely disgusting what he has done and there is no excuse for it. You have us internet strangers at least myself for support if you need it!

afrazer521

Appreciate it. I had to take anxiety meds even though I purposely wasn't before I went into full mental breakdown. I honestly can't fathom what kind of man would do that.

rakel88

@afrazer521 I'm so sorry. Unfathomable that, no matter what he thought you were doing, he would think engaging in that behavior is ok. Regardless of whether he physically cheated, if it's a second offense like that, your reaction to it is totally warranted, in my opinion. Like @Lindsayleigh1989 said, you've got support from us internet strangers.

Taymiller

@afrazer521 - I am so sorry

MrsRo731

@afrazer521 - I'm so sorry he's putting you through this. 

agradi

@afrazer521 you'll kick ass doing it alone! If he is such a crappy partner, you'll be better off.

fantasticmrsfox

@afrazer521 I'm so sorry

PinkLady2015

@afrazer521 well that fucking blows. Just know that we're all here to support you in whatever decisions you have to make. Do you have friends or family that can help you through this shit time???