Age difference in California that needs to be reported.

ppradoperez

When I found out I was pregnant I was 16 & bd was 19. He turned 20 five months ago & I turned 17 one month ago. I was concerned about his presence at the hospital since we have a very close relationship. My parents love him & approve of our relationship so they never thought about pressing charges on him since im underage. He will be totally responsible for our babygirl & will be moving in as soon as she is born. I am due in 4 days but we are afraid hospital might interfere & report the age difference so were not sure if he should be present cause of such issue. Was anyone in the same situation and didnt have a problem with hospital staff ? I am in California.

kaym6

I am not sure what the rules and laws are in California or how any of that works but wanted to say it's great your family is supportive and I hope you have a stress free delivery and that he can be there if that is what you want!

Jaylin85

California's age of consent is 18. This means that it is illegal for any person over the age of 18 to engage in a sexual activity with a person under the age of 18 regardless of whether they consent. I would just keep this in mind when you are making your plans. Good luck!

Mommyduclos

Oh man that is rough! I looked up the statutory rape laws in CA and technically anyone under the age of 18 cannot consent and therefore it would be considered statutory rape- even if BOTH parties are under 18. I can't imagine hospitals reporting every teen pregnancy to the police.... That just seems silly, but who knows. The line for a misdemeanor vs a felony seems to be 3 years of age- if he is more than 3 years older than you he *could* be charged with felony statutory rape. At least you fall into that "exemption", though obviously you wouldn't want him charged with anything. What you need to find out is if statutory rape is subject to mandatory reporting- which would require the medical personnel to local law enforcement/ child protective services. Then I suppose if you and your family don't want to press charges, clearly you don't, it would be up to the DA if they wanted to press charges or leave you be. But of course it seems filling out the new baby's birth certificate is where you are most likely to run into trouble, not necessarily having him at the hospital. He could be there and you could not totally let on that he is baby daddy, but filling out the birth certificate with both your information clearly shows illegal sexual activity. What happens if you leave that blank for now? Sucks for baby daddy, but he could be added later and better than him being charged with a sexual crime. It's frustrating that the laws are so strict in your state! The laws are much more lax in my state. I'm not sure if my post is a lot if rambling or actually helpful for you. Good luck!

Achae

It will vary by your state and locality. In our state the DA doesn't charge for 16 +\- 2 years. I'd say if you haven't been contacted by human services or cps about your pregnancy then you will be okay.

Monilee1017

PP this is what I was thinking. How is the hospital supposed to know his age if he is a visitor? They won't, the only way they will know is when you fill out the paperwork for the birth certificate. I would look more into this and have a talk about it with him. 

Latina211508

I was 17 when I got pregnant and my husband at the time 18. I personally did not have any issues with staff. It was obvious I was a younger mom but nothing ever came up. I live in southern CA but in general I do not know how the hospital takes action in those cases if any at all.

SummerOH

I would think this is only an issue if your parents wanted to do something, which they don't. There are a ton of teen pregnancies and the dads aren't getting arrested. I honestly wouldn't worry about it. Courts have more important things to do with their time. I would advise getting child support and paternity established through the courts asap. Things are great right now, and I'm sure they will continue to be, but hope for the best, plan for the worst. This also protects the father, so it's in his best interest, too.

mg137

You should contact a lawyer with experience in this area if you're worried. See if they'll take a few minutes over the phone to let you know if you should be concerned. I'd be surprised if anyone at the hospital is paying attention to and reporting stuff like this, but if you're concerned talk to someone who is competent to answer.

JanMommy2under2

Realistically I doubt they would do anything because they don't want to cause unnecessary stress to a laboring mother or to a mother that just had a baby.  My brother was 20 when he got a 15 year old pregnant, they were both at the hospital at time of delivery and nothing happened.  

DaphneMoon1

You have great advice here, but I wanted to add, it's not the medical professionals job to enforce the law. For example, if someone's tox screen comes back positive for an illegal drug, they do not call the police.

It would shock me if any medical professional asked the age of the father. Now, that doesn't mean social work or other assistance won't. Being a young first time mom, the doctor may ask social services to stop by to see if you need any assistance. This isn't to try and get anyone in trouble, it's literally to aid you.

I guess my point is, you don't have to tell anyone the age of the father. I doubt anyone will be asking but if they do, keep that info to yourself.

dancingbirdie

Cali mom here! Like others said I would just be careful. My now husband and I got pregnant when we were 17 and our baby girl was born after I had turned 18 and he turned 18 a couple months after. The hospital knew my age because of the paperwork and I listed him as the father. They never questioned me about it and here we are almost 6 years later having our second.

anightintunisia

The nurses and doctors in California (resident here!) would only contact authorities if you say that you feel unsafe or threatened around him. I also believe that if your family is alright with your relationship then the hospital staff won't mind. Like I mentioned as long as you don't seem as if you are in any danger you're good!

l4rk

Someone would need to go out of their way to report it, and then other people would need to go out of their way to press charges. People aren't going to waste the time and resources going to court if there are no other concerns.

HilaryD82

Resident of CA here. I believe if you are 16, the age difference would need to be 21. Also, you can Google this for more info. Try https://publichealth.lacounty.gov/mch/cpsp/CAChildAbuseRpt.pdf or you can Google "mandated reporting for statutory" or something like that.
I'd Google for more info on age difference that are ok. You can also see who is mandated reporters, I know social workers/therapists and teachers are. I thought doctors and nurses are too but maybe also something to look up

narissa2013

you can call your county's child protective services agency and do an anonymous consult if you want a definite answer on whether this is reportable.

MamaHolland

Latina211508 said:

I was 17 when I got pregnant and my husband at the time 18. I personally did not have any issues with staff. It was obvious I was a younger mom but nothing ever came up. I live in southern CA but in general I do not know how the hospital takes action in those cases if any at all.

This is not the same situation because @Latina211508 poster was married at the time.

ppradoperez

I didnt make it clear. Not mostly concerned about him being with me at the hospital during delivery but more worried when it gets to putting him in the birth certificate which would include his age. I went over it with two girls in my area who were in the same situation & according to one of them they had no trouble what so ever all the bd had to do was sign papers saying he will be responsible and the other girl said she didnt have him present nor in the birth certificate & when he went to visit she said he was a friend but in fear of getting in trouble. We both want to be present when she gives birth since hes so attached to our princess but we just fear that an exciting day may result in something else.

Mommyduclos

HilaryD82 said:

Resident of CA here. I believe if you are 16, the age difference would need to be 21. Also, you can Google this for more info. Try https://publichealth.lacounty.gov/mch/cpsp/CAChildAbuseRpt.pdf or you can Google "mandated reporting for statutory" or something like that.
I'd Google for more info on age difference that are ok. You can also see who is mandated reporters, I know social workers/therapists and teachers are. I thought doctors and nurses are too but maybe also something to look up

This is exactly what you need! It says that consensual sex for a person over 16 is not subject to mandatory reporting, so while still technically illegal, you or your parents would have to want to press charges for anything to get reported. This form is for LA county so if you aren't there you will probably want to find the one for your county, but if you are I'd say you are good to go, no one will report you unless you indicate it needs to be.

MollyA1011

This sounds nuts to me! Its one thing if it's causing problems but it sounds like he's being responsible and so are you about the whole thing. I sure hope you don't have any problems. You don't need that right now! Good luck momma!

ppradoperez

Thanks to all of you for your support & advice ! We will definitely risk it since its a moment all of us want to cherish. Im due in two days and hoping for the best